Not so Good Absolutely Safe Capsule 5

Disclaimer: You know damn well.

Begin!

"I'll just duck into my 'Absolutely Safe Capsule' for the time being. While I'm in there, no sort of attack whatsoever will affect me. You're probably thinking to yourself, 'Yeah, right! There's no such thing as absolutely safe.' But there is, and this is it! The capsule I tricked Dr. Andonuts and the Mr. Saturns into making for me! Me! ALL ME! *cough, cough*" said Porky, the Pig King, as he entered the Absolutely Safe Capsule. To his complete surprise and embarrassment, he tried to go into the capsule… only to find out that his large stomach would not allow him to. He tried to wiggle his way in, but he was simply too fat for the machine to let him in. He sighed loudly, and put a communication device on the ground, which revealed D. Andonuts, the scientist from 199X that Porky forced to work for him. "OK, Andonuts, we've been together for 3 years now, and all that time, not one of your machines has proved to be malfunctioning or unsatisfactory, correct?"

"Why, yes King P. Every one of my inventions that I have ever built for you has ever let you down." Dr. Andonuts proudly replied.

"OK, good, good. Now just one question… DO YOU THINK THIS IS SOME KIND OF JOKE?!" Porky suddenly began shouting. "I tell you to build me an indestructible, unquestionably safe capsule that I can get into when I'm in a bad situation, and what do you do?"

"…Um… I'm afraid I don't-"

"You build an indestructible unquestionably safe capsule that, apparently, I can't get my fat ass into! I mean, come on! You're better than that!"

"Well Pig King, I did build that for you a while a go, so there is a chance you just gained too much weight in the timeline." Dr. Andonuts tried to reason.

"Bullshit! You made that capsule for me like 2 days ago! There's no God damn way I could have gained 10 lbs. in those short 2 days!" Porky shouted, hearing snickering from behind him. He turned around to see Lucas, Kumatora, Duster, and even Boney, trying not to laugh. "Oh, so you think this is funny, do you?"

"I'm sorry, this is just to freaking funny not to laugh." said Lucas.

"It's really no surprise you can't get in the capsule, tubby." said Kumatora.

"Even if you didn't gain any weight, you wouldn't fit into that thing." said Duster.

"Woof! Woof! *You need some laxatives, pall!*" barked Boney.

"So you all think this is funny?" King P asked, and all 4 of them nodded simultaneously. "Hm… Andonuts, what would have happened if I went into the capsule?"

"Um… then you would be trapped there for all eternity. Why?" asked the scientist. Suddenly, Porky got an evil smile on his face.

XXX

"Hey! What are you doing?!" shouted Kumatora as Porky tried to shove all 4 companions in the capsule at once.

"In, you, go!" he shouted, finally squeezing all 4 of Lucas and co. into the small, cramped sphere, and closed the door, locking all 4 of them in the prison for all eternity. "…Oh, my God… I won… I actually won…" He suddenly ran out to the Masked Man before he could pull the needle, bear hugged him, kissed him on the check, and shouted, "I actually won!" No one in New Pork City could really tell you what else happened that day, except that they saw their king jumping up and down, shouting about how he won.

"…Wait a minute." said the Masked Man, still underground. Because Porky only cared about how he actually won something, he no longer cared about the Dragon. "I killed hundreds of people, burned a lot of property, and even train through this 'Needle Course' just to find out it was all for nothing?!... FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU UUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

Moral: Never make fun of another person's predicament, unless you're willing to suffer the same thing, but even worse.

Q: Which would you rather me do first, a Pokemon Fanfiction, or another random song parody?