Keladry of Mindelan watched as her best friend, the one she loved, sailed away. Sailed away to a new life, where he would be married, to a woman who was not she, as much as she had wished, at one time, that it were. Even now, some corner of her mind wished it, despite the way he had hurt her. Despite everything that had happened. Her rational thoughts told her to move on, to get over him, but that one little part, rebelled; refused to stop loving him. So she continues to care for him, even as he left her.
She watched as he left, with little more than a wave as he wrapped his arm around his soon-to-be wife, as the only man that she has ever loved, the only one she ever will, left. Inside, she mourned for the loss, but her expression gave away nothing. She would not let it. She hid everything away from her Yamani mask, not willing to let anyone see her pain.
As the days passed, all she could do was practice, for if she weren't practicing, she would remember. Remember everything of the past, everything they had shared, and feel all the pain. She refused to give into her thoughts, her memories. So she spent her time on the practice courts, fighting all her energy, hopes, everything, away. She counted the days passing by, incredibly lonely without her best friend. She truthfully had no clue as to what to do, and absolutely hated herself for it. She knew she had to move on. It was how she was going to that she had no clue of. So she just practiced alone, waiting for his return, knowing that when he did, he would be married to another woman. Each time she thought that, there was a pain in her heart as sharp as any blade.
She remembered, even though she tried not to, how happy they had been. Those wonderful years. She tried to hold them close and push them as far away from her mind as possible at the same time. She remembered how safe she had felt, being held in his arms, a feeling that had never before been there, and now how alone she was. And she hated him for it. Hated how he had given her love, only to rip it away, to go back to his original plans, acting as if she, as if they, had never happened. That cut as deeply as any blade.
She had lost so many, during the war. So many gone that she had cared about, that she had needed. Yet he had been there through it all, helping her when needed, comforting her. She had loved him, more than she had believed possible. While everything around her was changing, he was the one she constantly tried to hold on to.
Even now, she found herself lost in the mere memory of his eyes. That deep, beautiful green that had been so loving, caring, and protecting. She thought she was safe from everything when she was with him. But who could save her from him? Still she felt as if she couldn't live without him.
She remembered the first time she actually admitted her love for him. The war, as always, was on her mind, plans for battle for the next day, thoughts of those who had died. Then he had kissed her, and all of it rushed away, and for the first time in so long, she was at peace. Nothing plagued her mind. And it wasn't right. He had no right to make her love him as she did, then marry someone else.
She loved him so much. So much that it hurt. Of course, why wouldn't it? But now, it was over. Still, it was all, everything, she had known, or at least thought she had known, for the past three years. He was her rock, the one solid thing throughout that awful time that had kept her together, kept her sane. He was the one she held on to through everything. And now she had to let go, a feat that seemed almost impossible.
It hurt. She ached. She loved him. She wanted that love she had for him back- he didn't deserve it. And she wanted his love. She wanted him. But no-she wouldn't do anything to get him back. He had his chance, and he had thrown it away. She would not give in.
As she lay in her bed at night, she would look up at the stars and remember. She remembered how they had stayed, cuddled up before the fire, and watched the stars. He was her shooting star. He left her life just as quickly as he came in, fulfilling a dream, making her wish for more. And that was a thing that she would never forgive him for.
So, how'd you like? Really sucky? Idk. For those of you that didn't understand it, Kel is in love with Neal. During the war, they were together, and she thought they were in love. However, the minute the war was over, he was going to marry Yuki, just as he had planned. By the way, they were sailing to the Yamani Islands to get married. However, Kel was not going. I know, she most likely would, but oh well. So, hope you liked.
So, yeah. I revised it, so it included no song lyrics. I'm surprised actually that it turned out half decent. Lol. But I'm going to make a group under MSN or Yahoo with all my songfics so, if you like, you can read them. I'm quite attached. Lol. I will probably also add more there for this story. So, if anyone is interested, I will add more about it when I alter the next songfic. Also, anyone who would be interested in posting songfics there can email me!