So, I am sure you're all mad at me. I would be, too. In my defense, I had already re-written all of the chapters and was almost finished with the last one when my computer hard-drive crashed, making me lose everything. Needless to say, I said, fuck this. But then I continued receiving reviews and pm's, which inspired me to start over. I've re-done EVERYTHING. All of the chapters. I've combined the last chapter with a new part of the story added in. Chapters 2, 3, and 4 have been combined. This whole story should be almost like a brand new read, just refreshed. I hope you all enjoy the new Welcome to Camp Konoha, it's been far too long. I apologize. 3 Please, let me know what you think.

~ohscrewthename

Disclaimer: It's pretty obvious I don't own it if I'm writing fan fiction on it.

Activity 1

"Oh, no you don't. You can't make me go to camp again. No way. I'm sorry mother, but I'm putting my foot down."

I do just that. The impact practically shakes the whole house.

She's not sending me back there. She can whip me, verbally assault me, or stop making me pancakes every Sunday morning for all I care.

But I will never go back to that hell hole.

Never.

I blow some long, rebellious pink bangs out of my eyes and readjust my scarlet head band, my mint orbs locking with mom's deeper set. I fan myself with my heavy black cotton t-shirt, puffing the thick air onto my damp, perspiring skin.

It's all her fault that I'm sweating. We've been, no, she's been bitching for about two hours straight.

Her voice, or the heat…

I don't know which will make me pass out first.

And there goes my hair again. Always falling in my face.

Mom clears her throat at me expectantly. Like she's waiting for me to offer some detailed explanation as to why I'm so dead against this place.

I don't offer one.

"I'm not going Mom, so you're just going to have to deal with it. This is so ridiculous!" I slick back a few hairs from my perspiring brow again.

Why isn't the air conditioning working, anyway?

She looks to be wondering the same. Yeah, mom, I saw that bead of sweat dripping down the side of your face. I bet you want to wipe it. Bet you don't want to look weak.

You think you can stare me into submission.

Bring it.

"Don't you take the tone of voice with me, young lady," So says stereotypical TV mom, "you're going to camp this summer and that is final, you got that?"

Oh, I've got it, mom. Doesn't mean I have to keep it.

I make sure to fold my arms and furrow my brows.

She hates when I do that.

"Sakura..." Mom shifts around uncomfortably. She then finally succumbs to the heat, wiping at her brow with her shirt sleeve.

Round 5 is coming. I can feel it.

Tightening the fold of my arms, I'm both surprised and annoyed by her determination. For a normal jet-lagged person, a trip to South Korea and back within two days would have left them asleep on their ass.

Why the urgency?

Mom shifts her weight onto her other foot, practically the definition of exhaustion. Purple circles cradle her eyes like crescent moons. Her legs look like they're about to buckle..

It's better that she's weak. I'll have an easier time winning.

"Sakura, I have a flight for France tomorrow afternoon, I don't have time to bicker with you. I just don't feel comfortable leaving you at home by yourself anymore."

"I can't come with?"

"You know the answer to that, it's only for people with-"

"Yeah, yeah," I cut her off, "secret clearance."

"My coworkers can't go through legal transactions without me, you understand, Sakura."

She starts to smile at me, but yawns in the middle. "My job is very demanding."

I feel my fists clench.

You didn't give birth to work, Mom. You gave birth to me.

"Fuck your job."

I immediately bite my tongue. It slipped out.

"Sakura, I don't tolerate that language!"

Too late to go back now.

"Yet you can tolerate leaving me alone for your precious work? You can tolerate long flights? You can tolerate being your bosses' bitch?!" My knuckles pops.

"That's not true!" Mom raises her whole arm in the air and slams her fist into the wall.

I tense up, glad it was the wall and not me.

She blinks for a second, hand sliding down. "I'm sorry Sakura, I'm…just…"

Self-centered?

"…Tired. That's all. I've had to work so much and…I feel bad about leaving you here with nothing to do. I assumed you would have jumped at the chance for a trip away from home."

"For Paris, mom. Not for some kiddy camp. Besides," I brush off some forehead sweat, "You haven't had a problem with me staying home these past couple summers."

She rubs her temples. "I've never had enough time to bring it up to you, that's why. I've often pictured quite a few things that you could be doing without my parental supervision."

Parent? When did she ever supervise me?

"Well jeez, mom, since you know me so well, what do you think I do when you're never here?" My voice lowers a nasty octave, "Do I guzzle vodka from your not-so-secret supply? Rob banks or shoot people? Maybe I have some random guy plunge his dick into me if I'm not too busy?"

Mom's face drains, eyes turning icy. "You've just proven that you're too immature to handle staying home by yourself. Don't test my anger."

Anger from my lack of respect, or because I know where her alcohol trove is?

"Yeah mom," I spit, "because it is just SO friggin' dangerous sitting on the couch and watching TV all day. For the love of Buddha, I could, like, totally sprain my thumb by pressing the remote the wrong way!"

Mom's lips tighten into a line. I keep going.

"I mean, I don't know where I would go if I ever got a paper cut from my Crayola Coloring Book! And I have no clue what the number for 9-1-1 is!"

The fan overhead suddenly whirs with new life, rotating noisily. The power is back on, I suppose.

I welcome the breeze.

Mom apparently welcomes it as well, because her expression relaxes.

She's going to try sweet-talking me.

"I know it may seem like I'm overreacting, Sakura, but I really don't want anything bad happening to you," Here she drops back onto the ugly floral sofa she loves so much and pats the seat next to her, to which I begrudgingly join her as she continues, "And as your parent, I'm held responsible for anything having to do with you, and that includes decisions I deem the best. Besides, you're older now. What are you, seventeen? I'm sure camp will be different for you."

I stiffen. She doesn't even know my age.

"I don't think so, mom."

"Then tell me why camp was so miserable, then." Mom unexpectedly slips her warm hand on my shoulder. I try to keep my shoulders relaxed, not wanting to ruin her good mood. "Don't worry, I'll understand."

Biting my lip, I give her a dubious look.

I was never exactly accustomed to talking to her. Her government job has always kept her busy at all hours, and the only time I ever talked to her was when she was hurriedly rushing me to daycare, school, and after-school care.

Still, I could give it a go.

"Okay…"

..

"How preposterous! It's been two years, I expect you to be the bigger person and swallow your insecurities!"

I grit my teeth and look up.

The damn ceiling would probably understand me better than her.

Suddenly, her weight lifts from the adjoining cushion. The ruffling of heavy pages makes me jerk my head.

A phone book. She's looking up the camp's number.

Pretending like I've seen nothing, I stand and loftily walk to my bedroom, keeping silent even when she bitchily turns the phone speaker on.

She thinks I'll helplessly listen to her scheduling my fate.

Pulling my door halfway open in anticipation, I listen to the slow, steady rhythm of the phone dialing. After a few moments, it clicks, and a muffle creates slight static before a woman answers:

"Hello, this is a representative of Camp-"

Shoving the door forward, I slam it shut as hard as possible. I open it again, then slam harder the second round. Then a third.

Mom's voice escalates. I slam again.

Another. Even louder.

Finally, I hear her shut the speaker off. Then another slam.
From her bedroom door, not me.

Winning.

My face throbs with angry self-satisfaction. Wiping the moisture from my palms, I flop onto my bed to cool off.

A gossip magazine is resting halfway on my night stand, and I take it up. A blonde bimbo of a woman I don't recognize is on the cover, her headline being: "Party Girl's Tips On How to Look Sexy!"

She looks like Ino. The girl who made camp hell for me.

So yeah, this particular bitch had the typical bleached hair, tanned skin, big chest, and sparkling blue eyes. Eyes that she'd constantly brag about.

Unfortunately, I had the displeasure of waking up early in the morning to use the bathroom. Thus my walking into a slightly ajar stall and catching Ino in the act of sliding contacts over her eyes.

Dark, evil, shit-colored eyes.

I suppose she was trying to do it before anyone else woke up. Obviously, she wasn't too happy to see me.

She sweetly threatened-slash-promised to make the rest of my stay miserable. Me being the saint I am, I wouldn't have told, but Ino wasn't the type to take chances. She needed to show some beef to back up her burger.

I won't go into details.

I'll just say that a few of the male counselors' had suddenly grown very close to me after I'd supposedly written them "smutty" love notes.

This stacks on top of all the other girls' constant need to compete.

Shallow, shallow competing. Each girl trying to make herself prettier than the next, like some kind of catty, unspoken competition. The dirty looks, the backstabbing, the drama.

The need to out-shine each other to feel good about themselves'.

To top it all off, we always had to be up so fucking early.

I mean, what was the point of getting up at ungodly hours of the morning just to take a dip in an ice cold lake filled with fish shit?

If the sun isn't up, why the hell should I be?

Rolling onto my side, I can clearly hear myself asking that very same question of a counselor. After he had finished laughing at my completely humorless question, he'd explained that we should swim early in the morning to become closer to nature- to "experience nature at its peak".

The peak of what? I had asked. The peak of hypothermia?

Maybe this year they'll lay me out in the sun all day to experience the wonders of skin cancer.

But anywhore.

The fact that mom is turning a deaf ear to how unhealthy the environment was at the camp proves how little she actually gives a shit.

Or doesn't give a shit.

Closing my eyes, I visualize the rain that begins pattering against my window. I feel my shoulders slowly dropping down.

Then I suppose I must have fallen asleep. My throat is dry and slightly sore in the back, which only happens when I snore.

I feel around for my cell phone on the nightstand, the magazine sliding to the floor. My fingers touch something chunky and solid. I grab for it groggily as I bring my knees to my chest.

5 a.m.

I rub my eyes. Seriously?

I'll be damned if my body isn't already preparing for early camp mornings.

Sliding off the side of my bed, I pick my way around the obstacle course of crap in my room before making it to my door. I pull it open, but find my path blocked by something large and solid.

Jumping back in fright, I instantly flip the light switch.

Is it mom guarding the door?!

A black, vacant suitcase at my feet drags me back down to sanity. I almost wish it had been mom. Then I could I have "accidentally" stepped on her.

A suitcase means her mind is made up.

Grabbing the suitcase sulkily, I lug it into my room and flip it open. Yanking out my drawers, I dump all of my sexy panties, bras, clothes, bikinis, and pajamas into it waterfall style.

No point in folding any of it, they'll just go through my stuff, anyway. The older they get, the more creative they are in their tortures.

On that thought, I also stuff in a miniature medical kit, aspirin, and sleeping pills.

The last one will come in handy should I ever consider giving up hope.

I throw in anything else that crosses my mind: Makeup, my favorite pillow and blanket, suntan lotion, shaving cream, razor blades (multiple uses, there), hair products, brush, comb, snacks, deodorant, etc.

Just as I toss in some tampons, my stomach lets out a growl. Feeling pretty sure that I've been at this for over two hours, I shove my suitcase to the side and head to the kitchen.

I need food that'll actually stay down.

My fingers wrap around a pear, and I also pull out a slice from the bread bin. I'm too lazy to cook, so I take my strange breakfast back to my room. I try to pull out some last-minute ideas on how to get my mom to change her mind. All I end up doing is zoning out on my DS and gorging.

I hear my mom banging around, cursing about being late for something. Oops. Was I supposed to wake you up for that nine o'clock flight, mom?

Feeling somewhat gratified, I yank on a lemon colored tank top and a pair of navy shorts, pink ankle socks, and my white tennis shoes. I dab on concealer, curl and coat my lashes with mascara, slick on some lip gloss. All the while enjoying my mom's frantic footwork.

I do a quick turn. The shorts are short, the tank is low-cut, and my makeup and I might just be sexy enough to last the whole day.

Because everyone would prefer to die looking hot, right?

HONK!

With a start, I drop my hairbrush and run to the window.

Great, she's already in the damn car.

Which means we'd both be right on schedule.

HONK!

Suddenly, I lose my phone.

HONK!

I find it.

Then I misplace it again.

HONK HONK!

My teeth still feel fuzzy. I'd better brush them again.

And there I go dropping the cap!

HOOONNNNK!

Feeling the corners of my mouth lift, I finally emerge from the house and lug my suitcase into the trunk. Mom is glaring at me through the window. I don't bother hiding the smile on my face as I plop into the seat next to her.

"I've been calling you for the past ten minutes, Sakura."

I click my seat belt into place. "Oh, really? All I heard was honking."

Pop.

"Isn't the scenery beautiful, Sakura?" Mom sing-songs.

I stick my finger in my ear. Not sure if it's to shut my mom out or to keep my ears from popping.

"What gorgeous mountains- and would you look at those trees!"

Pop.

May it all burn in hell.

Grimacing at the window, I spy a white rectangle. As our car approaches, it turns into a sign with faded green letters:

WELCOME TO CAMP KONOHA!

Konoha?

Where the hell did mom take me, Hawaii?

"Uhhh…mom?"

No answer.

"I think we went the wrong way."

She looks straight past the wheel, lips tight.

"Mom?"

"Mom!"

The car grinds to a halt, perfectly positioned in a dirt parking lot. Barely turning off the engine, she rises quickly from her seat and slams the door behind her. Scraping sounds come from the back. She's taking out my suitcase.

Awkwardly following behind her, I receive the suitcase from her outstretched hand and give her a look. She shoots it back with a big smile.

"I've thought long and hard about what to do with you, Sakura." Her words seem misplaced with her face, "I've decided that you need something different."

I stiffen.

'Do with me'?

"What is this place, exactly?"

"Camp Konoha for girls."

Raising my brows, I glance ahead of me, looking past the sign where the campground is. A big building, with cabins lined up in neat rows forming U-shapes around it. And no people.

I suppose I'm missing the big welcoming assembly.

"You can create fresh memories here," She continues, "without being reminded of any past mishaps. What do you think?"

I can see she's holding her breath. Maybe she did listen to what I had to say, somewhat.

"I guess I'll live." I fib.

Mom's eyes crinkle approvingly before she draws me to her.

It takes me the full moment to realize that she's hugging me, but by then she's already pulled away. I still feel the warmth from her embrace, a feeling that hasn't surfaced in three years. My eyes start to sting.

The roar of an engine makes me blink the water away. I turn to see her arm sticking out the window, moving back and forth.

She certainly wastes no time.

I wave back, glad I stuffed a face towel in our bathroom sink and left the tap on.

"Enjoy the flood, mom!

Mom beams. "I love you too, be good, honey!"

Vehicle is too loud. Damn.

Turning my back to her, I adjust the grip on my suitcase, using my free hand to rub at my eyes.

The stupid dust must already be getting to me, or something.

Gravel crunches, indicating the movement of her car. More dust gets in my eyes, so I begin walking away. As I move along, her tires grow quieter and quieter.

Now there's only the sound of sneakers on dirt.

Loose hair whips around me as I climb, blowing strands into my mouth as I concentrate on a dark, drab building peeking out from above the hill. It's the big one I saw earlier, and I'm pretty sure that it's the registration office.

The moment I reach level ground, a sound like a slamming door echoes throughout the area. Whirring towards the general direction of the sound, I note that it's nothing but a teenage boy exiting his cabin.

Shaking my head at my overreaction, I continue walking, gaining my confidence back with every step. I'm being ridiculous, it was only a stupid guy that-

I stop walking.

A boy. Here?

My eyes swirl from the ground, to the cabin, before accidentally connecting with the eyes of that very same boy, who's now only a few feet away. Staring back at me.

Mouth open. Eyes wide.

His lips move. I continue to gawk.

Could this guy be one of those perverts they talk about on the news?

Light blue eyes and jeans, white t-shirt, spiked blonde hair, tanned skin, sculpted arms and legs. Boyish face, but adorable. He reminds me of Jesse McCartney back in his hay day. I had such a crush on Jesse.

Quite attractive for a rapist.

"I said, are you lost?" He asks, walking closer.

My ears function again.

Same with my feet, because I start running like hell.

My feet thud against the earth, but the rhythm sounds different- another set of feet pounding. Glancing over my shoulder, I see him closing in.

About to catch me.

I realize how ridiculous I'm being. He could be a relative of another camper here. A son of a counselor.

And I jump on the rapist wagon and ride with it?

Halting my feet with embarrassment, I move to the side just in time for Jesse to slide past me.

"Jeez, you run fast!"

Remaining silent, I give him time to recover himself from the sudden stop. It takes only the motion of brushing his pants off and re-adjusting the blue headband around his forehead before he brings his focus back to me.

"Wanna explain why you're following me?" I hear myself snap.

He grins. A smile that could make a crowd faint.

"Because you looked lost and scared."

I steady myself and glare.

This guy must be delusional. He's lost.

"Is this Camp Konoha?" I ask in monotone.

"Yup."

"Then I'm not lost."

Jesse looks at me peculiarly, scratching at the side of his head. What a dumb blonde.

Maybe I should simplify things for him.

"This is Camp Konoha for girls."

"BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

I watch him enjoy his sick joke, my face growing hot.

Not even an hour at this camp has gone by and I already feel awkward. Thankfully, he stops laughing long enough to speak normally.

"You know something?"

"I know a lot of things."

"'You won't know this."

"Try me."

"Okay then," He smiles, "I like you!"

I look at him in subtle wonder. What a weirdo.

This guy likes me and he doesn't even know me. I should be running for the police.

So why the hell am I so flattered right now!?

"I'm Naruto Uzumaki. You?"

"Sakura Haruno."

"Wanna know something else, Sakura?"

I cross one foot over the other one, feeling bashful and nervous and attracted all at once.

"Sure."

"This is a camp for boys."

It can't be.

"No it isn't."

Soggy noodles become my arms and leg. His lips start moving again. I've tuned them out.

More lies?

No. This guy had no reason to lie.

I need answers.

Pushing past him, I take the last few strides across the field until I've pushed forward the heavy registration doors. A quick glance to the right reveals an information desk.

My vision begins falling sideways as something solid blocks me, and my eyes skim past a neon cone positioned on the floor saying something about "caution".

"Whoa there!"

A large hand connected to a string-bean arm lifts me by the shoulder off the linoleum. I look up into possibly one of the largest sets of eyebrows I've ever seen. Above them, jet-black hair is cut into the shape of a bowl. Below, smiley black eyes and a wide grin, although not wide enough to proportion out those thick brows of his.

I move my shoulder out of his grip and take a step or five back.

His smile lessens. "You must be Sakura Haruno!"

He knows my name. Which means he's been expecting me.

Take that, Jesse.

"Yes, that's me!" I smile big.

"My name is Counselor Gai, but you may simply call me… GAI-SAMA!"

He flips his hair out of his eyes and strikes a model-like pose.

I think I even see sparkles surrounding him.

The sooner I confirm what this place is the sooner I can ditch this freak.

"So, is this a co-ed camp, or what?"

Gai gestures to a plaid chair next to him.

"No thank you. Is it all male, then, or female?"

"Have a seat, Sakura." He pats the chair with his hand.

I shake my head. "Where are the girls?"

"Just sit down."

"I don't want to. What's going on?"

Gai sighs and gives me a knowing look. "Listen to yourself. I can't talk to you unless you sit and calm down."

I take notice of my fast breathing.

He's right. I need to chill out.

Gingerly, I lower myself into the chair next to him. My eyes don't leave his weird looking face.

"This camp," He looks me in the eye, "is for males."

My mind rids itself of all sensible English.

"….adgiohghadg…"

"Now, I know that this must be hard, but it won't be so bad!"

So that boy was telling the truth after all. Why didn't this man tell my mom that in the first place?!

Seeing I'm unresponsive, Gai fills in the blanks for me.

My mother wanted to enroll me. She called him. He was half asleep on the clock, but answered anyway. She never mentioned my gender, only my name. He thought she's said Zachary. He's terribly sorry.

"Don't be sorry, it's all a misunderstanding." I reassure him, "My mom will come get me and it'll all straighten out."

"If I recall, your mother told me she'd be in Paris."

That's right. The flight she was rushing around for.

"Do you have any friends or relatives that can pick you up?"

"No."

"Well, no need to worry. We'll be happy to have you!"

Have me?

"Unfortunately, all of the rooms are full. But don't worry- even though the boys are friendly enough, we'll still keep a special eye on you. I'm sure you'll like it here." He holds his hand out to me for a shake.

I look up at him in horror. His smile falters when he sees my face.

What. A. Complete. Moron.

He may as well be saying: Hi Sakura, I've screwed you over and there's nothing you can do. Let's shake on it!

I sit on my hands and glare at him.

He squirms uncomfortably in his chair. "Well, uh, would you like something to eat? The guys are eating an early dinner in the cafeteria."

I'd like to rip those eyebrows off his face, but unfortunately, my stomach growls audibly at the mention of dinner.

Gai beams like I've done it on purpose. "Wonderful! Before you do that, though, take this map and find your cabin. I assume you've brought a suitcase that needs to be stored away, correct?"

I wiggle the empty hands under my butt. At some point outside, I must have dropped my luggage during my frantic sprint.

"Your cabin is number 32. And like I said, we'd give you your own, but we're full at the moment."

Wait a minute.

"I'll be sharing? With guys?!"

Gai nods. "Yes, but no worries. We'll go in for regular checkups on you. You're perfectly safe here."

So now he's bringing my safety into discussion.

Fan-fucking-tastic.

"I'm trying to make things as easy as possible for you." Gai pulls a key out of his pocket, unlocking a filing bin. "If you can't get a ride home, I'm just letting you know that things will be perfectly welcoming here, Sakura."

Shoving back my chair, I snatch the map from him. "I'll find a ride home, don't even bother!"

He pulls out a file and starts leafing through various papers. "I know this situation is difficult, and I apologize for my lack of professionalism in handling the situation with your mother. You will be fully reimbursed for your money, and your entire stay here will be completely on the camp's expenses."

I don't give two shits about my mother's money.

"Like any of that is supposed to make me better."

"You have every right to be angry. We will try to accommodate anything you need. The activities here will keep you busy, at the very least."

Another paper is produced. I take it from him and scan the words quickly.

A list of activities.

"Your mother selected all of them for you herself. On it will be the days and times of each. I really do apologize again, Sakura, and I hope you'll-"

The phone starts ringing, and Gai turns his attention from me to pick it up.

Sure, he's perfectly awake for that phone call.

Disgusted, I turn away. Better to leave now than to get in trouble on my first day for punching a counselor in the face. Shoving the schedule and map into my pocket, I pull open the big double doors and inhale the fresh air.

No sign of Jesse.

Both my shoulder bag and suitcase are laying in the dirt halfway down the field.

Thankfully untouched.

After hauling them up, I make my way toward the cluster of cabins, counting down to find my number.

34…

33…

32!

I twist my key in and pull open the wooden door.

My roommates must be baby tornadoes.

There is crap absolutely everywhere. Dirty magazines litter the floor, accompanied by tissues and wrappers, and empty cartons of cigarettes. A glass pipe catches the light underneath a bunk.

Either the occupants are buried under all of this crap, or they're out for the day.

I'm guessing the former.

At least the size of the cabin is sufficient. A plain square room with two bunk beds, one to the left and one to the right. In the back of the room and between the bunks is a desk with a black chair. Two big black chests are tucked under each bottom bunk. The other two chests are positioned on either side of the desk. Probably for our stuff.

I'm going to assume that the lower right bunk bed is mine, since that is the only bed clear of debris.

Plunking down my suitcase, I get to work. After setting up my blanket and pillow, I get lazy and just dump the rest of my suitcase into the empty trunk. I immediately lock it with the custom key provided and attach it to my cabin key chain.

After tucking my shoulder bag into my empty suitcase, I shove both of them next to the chest beneath the bunk and pull out my map.

I've dragged out time enough. The only thing I can occupy myself with now is going to the cafeteria. So I do.

It wasn't hard to find out all. Turns out, it's just to the left of the main office building.

I pull down my shorts a little and pick up my top, wondering why I didn't change first.

Too late now, though. I hear laughing voices approaching from behind me. A group of three boys walking straight for the cafeteria. Eager to avoid them, I make the mistake of abruptly slamming open the front doors to the lunch room.

Now every pair of eyes in that room are on me.

And so ends chapter 1 remake. Hope you enjoyed. ^^