A Life Of Romance With Luna Lovegood
Luna Lovegood was first and foremost a Ravenclaw at heart. Forays into life's unknown situations often found her either going, or resisting the urge to go to the library to look up the answers to her problems. Which is how she landed herself in this situation.
She, Luna Lovegood, had been asked on a date with a Hufflepuff in her year. She had said yes because he was very nice and seemed to not mind helping the first years with their troubles. She agreed that it was troubling that the firsties were unable to see the one eyed Dembledoes that hung around them and caused anxiety.
So she had agreed to accompany the boy, Mark Cooper, on a date. Since Harry was still fighting the silly battle against Lord Voldemort and the ministry's army of goblin eaters, they were unable to leave the grounds of the castle.
This was not all that disappointing. Mark had said that he had called in a few favors and arranged for them to have a nice quiet evening in the Room of Requirement.
Which led to where she was now: Hogwarts' Library. She had never been on a date before. In the essence of a true Ravenclaw, she decided to research the topic. The library had a medium sized section devoted to romance novels that would be perfect to help her understand what was going to happen during a date and how to get ready for it.
She had debated briefly about asking another girl what you do on dates but quickly dismissed that idea. The girls in Ravenclaw were all very mean to her. They still stole her things and occasionally "spilled" things on her homework or "borrowed" her books.
Ginny, still reeling over her sudden breakup with Harry, was known to burst into tears when someone mentioned dating. This would start a bout of hysterics that could last for up to a half hour. Luna just did not want to undergo the hysterics, she was nervous enough about this whole dating thing.
The students were encouraged to go to the head girl with all of their problems. Luna had tried that but was alarmed to note all of the Beezleboots hovering around her and had left in a hurry, absently suggesting arsenic as the best cure as she hurried away from the Slytherin. The girl had looked puzzled but had nodded her acceptance of the advice.
She scanned the shelves eagerly. Quickly deciding on "The White Witch and the Dark Beast", she removed it from the shelf. She sat at a nearby table and set her brilliant mind to the task of reading the book. Once she was finished, she realized that her understanding would not be complete until she had read several more of the books. Determined to make her date a smashing success, she set to the task with fervor.
Luna sat at her mirror and began the process of getting ready for her date. Absently putting on her customary minor amounts of makeup, she wondered what to do with her hair. She was already in the outfit that she was going to wear for the date, a grey skirt and a blue blouse that seemed to make her eyes bluer. She thought back to the romance novels. Using her photographic memory, she remembered a scene from "A Night With the Werewolves". In it, the heroine was getting ready to go to a ball before she was kidnapped by a group of roving werewolves. The main character had set her hair in an elegant chignon with a bit of hair to frame her face.
Decided, Luna happily began her final preparations.
Walking up the final set of stairs to the Room of Requirement, Luna was pleased to notice Mark's jaw drop. Her clothing shoed that she did not have a body to be ashamed of and her hair framed her face, just like the books said. Finally, approaching the last remaining distance between them, she said a greeting and waited.
"Um…er… Luna?" Mark said hesitantly.
"Yes Mark," she answered politely. He should know who she was by now, they had spent six years in the same school.
"Why are you wearing a picture frame on your head?" he asked. Indeed she was. She had picked a pretty bronze frame off of the castle wall after shooing its inhabitant away. She had then artfully strung her hair around it.
"Because I wanted to frame my face," she replied in the exact same tone that one comments about the contents of your last meal.
"Oh," replied Mark. And that was that.
Luna was pleased. Her last date had went so well, that Mark had asked for a second date. He said that they were going to be doing something slightly athletic and that walking shoes would be necessary. So she had picked up the book "Across the Mountains for Love" and had promptly read it and all that she could find like it.
She had decided on a white button down shit and a pair of cut off pants that ended at her knees. She had debated what to wear on her feet before decided on a pair of white trainers and some socks. Knowing the various authors' recurring mentions of "white ankle socks", she pulled out her wand and began to wave it around. And straightening her shirt, she left for the Room of Requirement.
Mark was surprised to see Luna approach him looking almost normal. There was only one strange thing about her outfit and that was her socks. Feeling glad that she had left her hair down, the pair exchanged greetings before inquiring about her socks. They were white and had peach colored blobs all over them. They also came up to the middle of Luna's shins.
"What's on your socks?" he asked curiously.
"Why they are ankle socks of course," she replied instantly. Mark squinted and was able to determine that her socks did appear to be covered in ankles. He opened his mouth to ask why her socks were covered in ankle when she continued. "I had done some research and it appears that boys have some obsession with white ankle socks. It must mean ones like these because everyone knows that those plain white socks that come a little above your ankle went out of style years ago. I thought that this is what the author meant. I did want to make you happy after our last date went so fabulously. What are we going to do today?"
Luna had officially passed beyond pleased. Her last date had been wonderful. They had enjoyed a bit of snorkack hunting in the room generated version of Sweden before having a picnic. She had gotten her first kiss. They were having their next date tonight.
It was a Halloween ball. Almost the entire school was going to be there. Even the younger years were going to attend. She hoped that there would be no fairy ghosts at the dance tonight. While the living fairies were peaceful, the fairy ghosts were evil and in league with the Ministry.
All of the books that she had read mentioned dresses that highlighted cleavage. She was already wearing dress robes, now she just needed to highlight her cleavage. With a wave of a wand she conjured up what she would need.
With a smile, she met Mark outside of Ravenclaw Tower. Mark greeted her and then looked at her chest in confusion.
"What did you do to your…"he waved a hand absently about his chest area. Luna frowned at her boyfriend. Wasn't it obvious? She looked down at the bright yellow streaks on the skin of her chest.
"I highlighted my cleavage for you! It was simple. Apparently muggles have these tools called a highlighter that does all of the work for you. Did you know you had a Dingbinger hovering about your head?" Mark looked at Luna in disbelief. He was Muggleborn after all.
"Is that a bad thing?" he asked warily. These purebloods sure had some funny customs.
"No, I think that it is just fine," Luna replied happily.
So… you just read that and decided that was unusual. But I was reading some very popular fics and noticed how everything was "frame her face" this and "white ankle socks" that and "highlighted her" something. In my typical view of things, get some new hairstyles, went out of style SO long ago, and I think that the significant other would notice the mentioned body part regardless, respectively. So I decided to break into parody. This ma show up again later as I notice these things more. But this story will begin to be random ficletts and drabbles.