Disclaimer #1: I do not own any characters from "The Walking Dead." They are the property of Robert Kirkman, Glenn Mazzera and AMC. No money is changing hands in the writing, reading or distribution of this story.

Disclaimer #2: All original characters, including those based upon information graciously supplied by my readers, and the actions and beliefs of those original characters, are of my own interpretations and should not be assumed to completely represent, as a whole, the individual who agreed to become part of this story.

Special Thanks to:VeritasKym, Jezebella Corvus, Day of the Dead Tattoo Girl, Kay012js, Equal-Opportunity-Reader, The Boney King of Nowhere, BeingLolaStar, RainbowShelby, Melanthia Chase, Alec1116 and Artificial Hero for agreeing to influence this story! Thank all of you of you for reading, reviewing and making "Badass and Beauty" what is has become!

Author's Note: Chapter 1 is the warm up and scene setter; I don't like that I couldn't get all of your suggestions in this one, but you will meet some "familiar" characters and/or see some familiar things in the next few chapters! This is meant to be funny, intriguing and eventually, kinda sexy! But mostly, I hope you all laugh! (And bonus points to whoever translates the French!)

Special Credits: "Drunk On You" by Luke Bryan – Drywall & Kym's theme…

Guns and Roses

Chapter 1 – …cottonwood fallin' like snow in July…Sunset, riverside, four wheel drives…

"Tell me more about him!" Kym was so enthusiastic about this double date, finally having some legitimate reason for hanging out with her older sister, that wasn't going to get her somehow run off if things started going well between Grace and her date for the evening. Nope, this time, Kim had her own date too…something she had an oddly good feeling about, though she couldn't describe why. Didn't matter that she had no idea who her date was…in fact, she didn't even know who it was Grace was going out with either…and Grace wasn't being real talkative.

But, it was going to be good to get out…Kym was taking her camera and everything…had been inspired by the new billboard across the street from their house to start documenting the people she hung out with and had a good time with in photographs. It appealed to her artsy side, and hey, maybe if she were lucky, her date would turn out to be just a hot as was the muscled up, shirtless hunk with the fox-sharp face with the little mole sitting just off to the left of his perfect mouth, modeling those designer French jeans that Kym had been staring at every night when she got into bed! A long shot probably…men didn't really look all sculpted and strong like that, not without some airbrushing…at least, Kym had never been lucky enough to have arms like the ones hanging off of that jeans modeling hunk wrapped around her…she'd never reached up and grabbed a handful of big, muscled shoulders like the one's blue jean boy was sporting…and her fingers had never walked down a set of six pack abs as prominent as steps in a staircase, that lead straight to the tantalizing darkness that concealed just what was filling out the front of those French jeans…

Whew! Kym's eyes darted up a moment and she stole a quick glance of her imagined boyfriend, 15 feet tall in black and white, staring back at her through the window from across the street, with a smug smirk like he had a surprise for her…but Kym knew she was going to have to let go of blue jean boy if she was really going to give her date the chance he at least deserved to impress her…because blue jean boy was a tough act to follow! So…yeah, whatever Grace could tell her about who it was Kym was going out with tonight would sure help to break the hold that blue jean boy had over Kym right now…but Grace was ignoring her…or, maybe Grace was off on another ozone expedition…Kym had to admit that her older sister had been acting kind of distracted and odd lately…and Kym was pretty sure she knew why, but she wasn't about to say anything. Nope, she just wanted more info on her date! "Hey!" She called over to Grace. "What's he like? This guy you set me up with?"

Grace sort of jumped, clearly deep in her own thoughts and self-wallowing up until now. "Oh, he's…a real…down to earth kinda guy." She finally answered, but she sounded sort of like she meant what she'd said in a much different way than what the words usually implied…but she didn't explain; she was too preoccupied staring at herself in her own mirror, standing there with the waist band of her ripped up skinny jeans with all the studs on the back pockets pulled down to about the ridge of her hip, and Grace's blue eyes and her finger played gently at the big gauze patch taped to her side. Whatever was under it seemed to be really weighing heavily on her…probably some embarrassing new tattoo, knowing Grace…but Grace had seemed to really be mooning over it ever since two nights ago when she'd snuck into the house late, wavy, chestnut hair a mess and the side seam of her fitted plaid shirt ripped and her hand clutching that same place where the gauze pad was now above her hip…and Grace had smelled all over of that no good Merle Dixon…whom Grace hadn't spoken of since that night…yeah, Kym's money was on embarrassing tattoo; something her sister had gotten in tribute to a man who had once again dumped her, or that Grace had dumped herself one more time.

But Kym wasn't wasting her time thinking about Merle Dixon right now, she was too excited about her date, sitting at her vanity and putting all her skills as a make-up artist to work on her face, bound and determined to be the prettiest girl her date had ever seen…or that blue jean boy had ever smirked smugly at…whichever. But, back to reality…whoever Grace was going out with tonight, he'd had a friend…or whatever, who had also been in need of a date…and Grace had assured Kym that she'd like this guy…and Kym was hoping she could believe that…even if part of this double date was feeling more like if Grace hadn't found someone to go out with her date's mysterious friend, then that would have been a deal breaker.

Kym didn't even know guys did that…but whatever…if nothing else, Kym would have done anything to discourage her sister away from Merle Dixon…and since Grace hadn't said his name at all in the last two days, Kim felt that she could assume her sister wasn't going out with Merle Dixon tonight, that Grace was moving on…and that was the real reason Kym wasn't too opposed to this blind date she'd been set up on. Anything to get Grace away from Merle once and for all…Grace and Merle…hmm…Kym had to admit, there was some chemistry between those two…unfortunately, it was the same type of chemistry that gave rise to things like napalm and mustard gas…

"Hey, before you go crazy pulling outfits and asking me what I think, I should go ahead and tell you that what you have on right now will do just fine." Grace turned away from the mirror and said. "Think of this as…something relaxed…you know, nothing real high falootin'…that's not who we're going out with tonight," but then Grace kind of sighed as she sat down on her bed. "Not by a long shot."

Kym should have been suspicious at that point, and she kind of was, but she was more struck by the outfit recommendation, looking down at the clothes she was wearing and then over at her sister like Grace was crazy. "I can't wear this on a date, Grace! An old tattered up pair of cutoffs and this tied up T-shirt that I dripped homemade wine all over? Are you kidding?"

"Tonight you can," Grace insisted, then sat forward, staring at herself in her mirror again, her posture stiff. "Like I said…relaxed…" only Grace looked anything but relaxed, particularly when she went to toying with that gauze pad on her side again. "Just, don't worry, okay Kymmi? You're a beautiful, long haired, green eyed, brunette with a nice rack, long legs and sparkly little labret where a beauty mark should be…you won't need to dress all fancy to impress your man."

Kym smiled…but she really should be digging deeper into this, despite that she didn't want to…not just yet anyway…what was so wrong with just feeling good…for a little while longer? She was going out with a "down to earth guy" who apparently impressed easily…hmm…yeah, Kym was definitely going to have to dig more…but…later…for now, she liked being excited and wanted that to continue while it could…before Grace inevitably said whatever it was she was going to say to ruin this whole thing…ah well, at least there was always blue jean boy! But Kym just smiled…Grace hadn't ruined this date yet. "So, is he nice?"

Grace gave a harrumphing kind of laugh that Kym already didn't like. "He's…good looking."

"That's not what I asked." Kym reminded, reaching for a different make-up brush and getting more and more worried…but that kind of got Kym's hopes up, because hey, blue jean boy was good looking, too! "Is he nice?"

At that Grace looked interminably guilty and fell back onto her bed with a groaning shout. "Alright, the only reason I'm coming clean here is because you're my sister, and I owe you the truth…but don't think for a minute that you're backing out on me tonight, because I need you to be there!" She sighed and then just shook her head, "It's Daryl, okay? You're date tonight is Daryl!"

Kym felt like she'd been slapped in the face. "What?" She shouted back at Grace. "Daryl? Like Merle's little brother, Daryl? The one even Merle describes as 'cockeyed?' That Daryl?"

Grace sat up again, rolling her eyes. "That's just Merle's description, okay? I never said Daryl was 'cockeyed,' so who are you going to believe? Merle? Or your own sister?"

"I have a better question," Kym countered, not liking how Grace was trying to sell Daryl to her…Daryl, whom Kym had never met or seen, but knew via Merle's adjectives. "Why is it I have to go out with Daryl tonight?"

One more time Grace sighed, had her 'I don't wanna talk about how I screwed up' face on, but Grace knew she was going to have to make with the details this time. She got to her feet again, put her hands on her hips…toying with that gauze pad again. "Look, something…happened…between Merle and me a few nights ago, and it scared us both pretty bad…and now he's mad and I'm confused, and we're both still scared…and I just really need to talk to him about it, but he's been avoiding me…so when I finally got him to call me back, and I suggested we go out, just to talk, he got all redneck on me, figured he had me when he went and said the only way I'd be seeing him for a date ever again was if I could find someone to go out with his 'cockeyed' brother too."

"So you 'found' me?" Kym yelled, couldn't believe she was hearing this…so much for being excited about her date…her date was Daryl Dixon! Cockeyed Daryl Dixon! And Kym just bet that Merle's little brother didn't hold a candle to blue jean boy!

"You were closest!" Grace yelled back, somewhat apologetically, but not enough, having to dodge the hair brush that Kym threw at her.

"I don't believe you'd do this to your own sister!" Kym yelled back again, and looked around for something else to throw at Grace. "What is the big deal if Merle doesn't want to see you? That's a good thing, Grace! You're no good for him! He's no good for you!" But just then Kym caught sight of that gauze pad under Grace's shirt and she sighed. "It's just a tattoo, Grace. What could it say? 'Merle forever, forever Merle?' Just…get it removed…permanent's not permanent anymore! Ink doesn't mean you have to stay with a guy!"

But Grace's face went serious and she looked across the room at Kym gravely. "It's not a tattoo." She said, and sort of had to compose herself before she went on. "It's a bite mark."

"What?" Kym got to her feet and ran to her sister like she had some idea she was just going to rip off that gauze pad and have a look for herself; a bite mark didn't make any damn sense! "How did you get bit? And by what?" Grace may have seemed really shook up by it, but to Kym, it was just strange…but then, Merle and Grace always had been strange. What the heck had they done two nights ago that ended up with Grace having a bite mark and had also put Grace and Merle in such a "scared and confused" state?

But Grace still wasn't getting into it, pushing past the whole "bite mark" admission and moving into pleading mode. "Just, please don't bail on me, Kym! I need you to go out with Daryl! I know you don't understand me and Merle, or even like me with Merle…I get it, I do…it's a pathetic relationship and I deserve better…he's old enough to be my father, he's loud and boisterous and backwards and racist and a womanizer who's cheated on me with Jezebella, Kay, Julie, Lola, Shelby, Amy, Ellie, Jae, some woman who had the initials E.O.R. embroidered on her silk Vickie's that I found shoved in his glove compartment, and even that girl with the Day of Dead tattoo. And he does like a good snort of something illegal, dangerous and controlled…but," and Grace sighed again, looked at Kym so forlornly. "We really did it this time…we're in some real trouble here…and if me and Merle don't talk about this, then it could be the end…and I don't want that, even if he'll never be anything more than some redneck asshole. I love him, Kym! So please…help me keep my man!"

Part 2 - Roll down the windows, turn it on up…Pour a little Crown in a Dixie cup…Get the party started…

"I ain't understand what the hell I'm doin' this for!" Daryl grumbled, elbow propped up on the open passenger's side window of Merle's late model, primer and rust covered, crew cab pick-up. "I don't want no part 'a your Grace problem! She's crazy! I don't know whatja spend time with her for! Ain't no one in King County what don't get the feelin' somethin' bad's gonna happen when they see the two 'a ya's together, and that's usually how it goes, too! You do remember back ta' when she blowed up the propane tank to our trailer cuz you was messin' with…everythin' in a skirt?"

But Merle kep' on 'a drivin', never once made a grab for the chrome plated, fully illuminated, rebel flag emblazoned suicide knob what Merle'd clamped to the steering wheel to make for to turn the truck around. They was on their way…and no matter how reluctant Merle'd been seemin' 'bout seeing Grace, Merle weren't backin' down. He looked over at Daryl and give him a good scowl. "Ain't gotta whole lotta choices left no more with Gracie, son. Really let her get me treed this time…just gotta find my way outta it, and that means yer gonna help me."

"Damn it," Daryl growled, knowin' he'd always be there to help his brother with whatever it were what Merle needed help with…but why'd it require a sacrifice like this'n? "Cain't I help you without havin' to go on some stupid date?" He snarled, gettin' cagier. "Christ, Merle; I been with girls, but I don't date! I ain't never been on no date!"

Merle give a low, alligator type 'a growl. "I know that! Hell, it weren't for pussy, I wouldna put up with this shit my own-self! And maybe if you wasn't so cockeyed, you'd have more of a social life. But since you ain't nothin' but a cockeyed, scruffy faced, scrawny little waif, then it's gotta be up ta' me ta' see that ya get yerself some some-ways, and this is how we's gonna do it!" Merle replied, but looked straight ahead as he drove, ignoring the piece of white gauze pad taped to his forearm even as he scratched at it with the hand that didn't hold the steering wheel…somethin' was up with that gauze pad…weren't like Merle to keep a wound bandaged like he'd been keepin' this one under wraps; were almost like he was hidin' it from hisself.

That piece 'a gauze 'a taped to Merle's big forearm were a curious 'nuff thing to make Daryl ignore the "cockeyed" comment…and the "scrawny" one too…maybe Merle were bigger, but Daryl weren't "scrawny"…but mostly it were the 'cockeyed' part what stuck with Daryl…he hated it when Merle calt' him "cockeyed"…talkin' like Daryl was some sorta retard…but there were too much on Daryl's mind now to challenge none 'a what Merle'd said. Daryl had a date…weren't no gettin' outta it…and all cuz his brother his crazy-ass, on again, off again, romance with Grace had once again gone south.

But the strangest part was that Merle and Grace had seemed to be doin' just fine for a stretch of 'bout two weeks…no key marks and slashed tires on Merle's truck, no drivin' by to piss in Grace's mailbox at 4:00am, no calls from Grace to 911 'bout Merle harborin' a weapon 'a mass destruction, what turned out to be nothin' more 'an Merle's usual contagiousness with the Clap, no sneakin' over to Grace's barn in the middle 'a the night to back up the cart full 'a horse manure and empty it onto Grace's car, no propane tanks bein' blowed up…things was actually good between 'em for once…and then all of a sudden, Merle stumbles into the trailer two nights ago, pale faced and holdin' his hand over the spot a gauze pad now covered, and Daryl found hisself facin' an uncomfortable evening…with some strange chick.

"So this girl," Daryl sighed, realizing they were more than half way to Grace's place by now. "She good lookin'?"

Merle shrugged, his own thoughts clearly on a lotta things other than fightin'. "Grace says she's 'nice.'"

"'Nice'," Daryl repeated in a flustered tone. "Fuck!" And he punched the door panel.

"Hey now, boy!" Merle growled louder than Daryl ever coulda. "You best stop ta' punchin' my truck and get it straight in your cockeyed head that yer gonna do whatever you gotta do to help me get the hell outta this thing what I done got myself into with Grace! You hear me, boy?"

But before Daryl coulda answered or protested none, he watched Merle's eyes take sight 'a somethin', openin' up wide, Merle's expression more shocked 'an Daryl'd ever knowed it to be before. What were wrong with his brother? What on God's earth had Merle laid eyes on…and then Daryl'd seen it himself…right across from Grace's house…big as anythin'…

Merle stopped the truck right there in the middle 'a the road and turned straight at Daryl. "You wanna try explainin' 'at?" And he shifted one 'a them big shoulders up at the picture on the billboard, big as a school bus, the no shirt…and the jeans…and the, all a' everythin' that Daryl was turnin' the hell away from.

"What?" Daryl asked, like he didn't see nothin', but that weren't gonna work, so he finally just took a gander up ta' the billboard hisself, determined to get outta this some ways. "You some kinda ad exec now?"

But Merle just leveled a look at him and growled again. "You some kinda fancy pants, pretty boy, faggot jean wearin' model, now?" Merle glanced up at the billboard again, but only briefly, lookin' away again quick like it hurt him to see it. "I give ya what I thought was a good talkin' ta' not so very long back 'bout this kinda shit!" And then Merle went and stole another look at the billboard, long enough to read the ad. "'Embrasse Mes Cul" jeans'... ils vont vous donner envie de!" Merle repeated, more than impressed, in all the wrong ways. "What the fuckin' hell that means, boy?"

But Daryl just bowed up, ducked his head and was determined to get through this…but his date tonight was suddenly feelin' like a step up from where he was right now. "Why you askin' me for? I don't talk French!" He insisted, and he didn't…even if he knowed what it was that billboard said. "And whatja lookin' at? That ain't me!"

Merle shook his head though, as staunch as what Daryl was. "Sure looks like you, boy! Looks like you in a little pair a fairy britches!"

Fairy britches…God damn it! Daryl growled hisself. "Merle, it ain't—"

"Shut up!" Merle growled back, even louder, but then got quiet, mutterin' to hisself and a rubbin' where that gauze was on his arm. "I cain't be dealin' whichya and all yer sissy-boy proclivities right now! You cockeyed little pussy!" He hollered, and then shook his head, puttin' his big foot back on the gas and grabbin' that Reb flag suicide knob as he slowly turned the truck towards Grace's driveway, still shakin' his head and still mutterin'. "Boy had hisself a brain, he'd prolly just take it out 'an play with it…" but Merle didn't look towards Daryl as he talked, his eyes was square on Grace's house, his head still shakin'. "And he's all I got what to help me save the damn world!"