Title: Harm and Mac Get Psychoanalyzed
Author: rooster dawn
Classification: Harm/Mac
Spoiler: Death Watch, Bud's wet down
Disclaimers: The characters of JAG are the property of Donald Bellisario and Bellisarius Production, Inc. Used without permission. No copyright infringement intended. May be reproduce if unchanged, author given full credit, and no financial transaction is involved.
Summary: Harm and Mac go undercover as a married couple. Under analysis they are made to face how they feel about each other.
Feedback is greatly appreciated and welcomed.
part one
2000 hours
McMurphy's Bar
It was a Friday night. Both Bud and Harriet had recently been promoted, Bud to full Lieutenant and Harriet to Lieutenant Junior Grade. As was the tradition of the navy Bud and Harriet were throwing a wet down party. They invited the JAG staff and their families to McMurphy's Bar after work.
The party had been going on for about an hour. Four women; Carolyn, Harriet, Jordan and Mac, had manage to get together at one of the tables. They were sitting around talking about what was important in life, a good man and a family.
They talked about how lucky Harriet was to have Bud and little Aj in her life. It was something that they all wanted someday. They continued on this venue until the subject of Harm came up. They all agreed that he was the real deal and a prized catch.
"So Jordan, how's Harm in bed?" asked Carolyn. She had always dreamed about what it would be like to be with Harm.
"I'm sure that Sarah can tell you as well as I can." replied an embarrassed Jordan.
She thought this might be a good time to find out a little more about the Harm and Mac dynamic. Had they been together as a couple at one time? How did they really feel about each other? She suspected there more to their relationship than friendship.
She had noticed the interaction between the two of them. They had to be more than friends or wished they were. Everyone she had ever talked to had commented to her about how they were when they were together. Harm never wanted to talk to her about his relationship with Mac or how he felt about her.
She had remembered talking with Harriet about them one time. It seemed that Mac had followed Harm to Russia in search of his father last year. Harriet had told her that they were very close until a man name Chris showed up.
Mac had killed him in self defense, but afterwards Harm had been quite distant from Mac. She wondered what it was all about. Harm wouldn't talk to her about it, he told her that it was up to Mac to tell her.
"What! What was that? How would I possibly know how Harm is in bed? I've never dated Harm." replied a shocked Mac wondering how she was pulled into this conversation.
"Come on Sarah, you have traveled all over the world with him. You've been to Russia, Iran, Columbia, Japan, Italy, Ireland, Panama etc....... " argued Carolyn.
"Sure I've traveled to all those places with Harm, but I have never slept with him in the terms that you're referring about. We've slept in the same room together several times, and recently in different bunks on a sub with fifty other men.
I even spent the night in his arms once in the mountains after I was shot by poachers. But I've never slept with him as you are implying." explained Mac hoping that they believed her.
"Come on Sarah, you want us to believe that you have never slept with Harm." disputed Carolyn.
"I have never slept with him. I swear Jordie. I would never do anything to take him away from you. I'm ..... I'm ..... taking a break away from men. I've joined ..... a mental nunnery." wailed Mac wondering why Carolyn was doing this to her. She was suppose to be her friend.
"I think thou protests too much my dear Sarah." laughed Carolyn. She loved putting Mac on the spot.
"I know he's only mine until you decide you want him Sarah. You are the only one he truly loves. I think he's only dating me until you are emotionally ready for a relationship." added Jordan.
"I'm not sure about that. He has always told me that all he wants with me is a professional relationship, not a romantic one." replied Mac. God she wished what Jordan was telling her was really true.
"That's only because he's afraid he'll lose you if you're not ready for a romantic relationship and it doesn't work out. I believe that he is trying to avoid the pressure of having that kind of relationship with you until you are ready to have one." explained Jordan sadly.
As much as she hated to admit it, she knew it was true. And being here with Harm's friends tonight confirmed that fact. She saw the way he kept looking at Mac. He never looked at her in that manner.
"Ma'am, you know that you love him. We all can see it by the way that you look at him and talk to him." chirped Harriet wondering why her friend couldn't see the truth.
They all look over to Harm. They noticed that he was watching them. They started giggling. He smiled back at them and waved to them. He wondered what was going on with them. Were they talking about him?
"I will admit that I have feelings for him, but I don't know if it is love? It really doesn't matter because Harm won't do anything about it. He always talks about the regulations against fraternization in the same chain of command." countered Mac with resignation.
"I think it all comes down to not wanting to commit to anyone. He's afraid that he's going to lose your friendship." explained Jordan.
"Remember what happened when he was dating Annie. When it didn't work out Annie didn't want to have anything to do with him. They were good friends before they started dating, but now they aren't even friends anymore.
Harm can't even see Josh. You know how much he loved spending time with him. He went through the same pain as a child as Josh is going through. He knows what it feels like to lose a father." reasoned Carolyn.
"That's true. I know you are right, but ..... " Mac tried to argued.
"Besides the no fraternization regulations are designed to discouraged casual sexual relations between men and women serving together during times of war in combat situations. They weren't meant to discourage two people who are in love.
Look at Harriet and Bud. The Admiral allowed them to work together and develop a loving relationship. They were allowed to get married and continue to work together. The chain of command issues are only dealt with for paperwork purposes." continued Carolyn.
"True, but Bud and Harriet have been known to act out a lot at work, which have been quite disturbing to everyone. I don't believe the Admiral would like to see a repeat performance from another couple." argued Mac.
"That may be true Sarah, but you can't let what other people and policy determine whom you are going to fall in love with. So anyway Sarah, when was the first time you knew that you were in love with Harm?" asked Carolyn with a sly smile.
"This should be interesting." commented an interested Jordan. She knew Harm and Mac were close. Maybe if Mac was forced to deal with her feelings with Harm everyone would be happy.
"Me? Why are we now talking about how I really feel about Harm?" asked a stunned Mac. Talking about her feelings was not going to get Harm to want her moaned Mac to herself.
"Because Harm is our favorite hunk to talk about. And since we all know he really wants you, we want to talk about your relationship with him." grinned Carolyn.
With a sense of resignation Mac decide to play along.
"Okay then, there was an instant physical attraction the first time we met in the White House Rose Garden. He had just received the Distinguish Flying Cross Medal. You have to respect anyone who has earned one of them.
So I was already pump before I even met him. So when I did meet him for the first time he was standing there in his dress whites and gold wings. He was tall and drop dead gorgeous. My heart began to beat faster as I looked up at him.
I couldn't believe it when he looked into my eyes as if he was searching for my soul. When the Admiral asked us if we knew each other. I said no and he said yes. I was confused.
It was like he was trying to tell me we were long lost soul mates who had finally found each other again. After a few seconds he gave me one of those smiles that we all love. My heart started to beat even faster. It took every ounce of my being not to succumb to his charms." smiled Mac as she told her story.
"Yeah, he does have a great smile and he is very charming when he wants something." agreed Carolyn.
"He then started putting his incredible charms to work. He said dress whites and gold wings would get a naval aviator anything he wants all the time." continued Mac with a gleam in her eyes.
"Wow! That's incredible! What happened next Ma'am?" asked Harriet. Mac looked at her as if to ask her why can't you call me Mac or Sarah like everyone else.
"It took all my self resolve and military bearing not to cave in to him. I couldn't let him know that he could get his way that easily. That all he had to do was smile and I would do anything." continued Mac.
"So what did you say to him Ma'am?" asked Harriet. She was really getting into the story as well as Carolyn and Jordan.
"It's Sarah or Mac, Harriet." sighed Mac.
"I told him that dress whites and gold wings were highly over rated Commander. It might work on weak minded naval women, but it doesn't work on ass kicking marines. I was scared that he could hear my knees knocking." smiled Mac.
"Ooh! That must have knocked him down a peg or two?" teased Carolyn.
"What did he do Ma'am?" begged Harriet for more.
"He just smiled at me and said we'll just have to see about that. I felt my knees buckle a little more when he said that. I don't know how I was able to move when the time came to get into the car." replied Mac.
Everyone laughed when they heard what Mac had to say. They all agreed that it would be very hard to stand up to the charms of Harmon Rabb Jr. when he wanted you. They all looked over to Harm. Harm wondered why they were laughing and looking at him at the same time. He just smiled back at them. Mac went on with the story.
"So you and Harm went to Arizona after your uncle. Was Harm even aware that you were going after your uncle?" asked Carolyn.
"No, but he found out about it quickly enough. He was going to go with the federal agents in the helicopter in one direction. I was going off in another direction in the car. I guess I didn't wait long enough because he saw that I wasn't going in the right direction.
He had the pilot set the helicopter down by me and got into the car. He thought I knew something that he didn't. I had to tell him why I was going in the direction that I was and I had to take him with me." replied Mac.
"Well Harm is pretty smart when he wants to be." declared Carolyn.
"Please don't ever tell him that. His ego is big enough already." pleaded Mac.
"So what happen next Ma'am?" asked Harriet.
"Well a couple of hours down the road Harm decided to change vehicles. He thought Webb had put a bug in our vehicle. He rented this old beat up pickup with a cap on the back and a bed inside.
He said we could pretend that we were a couple and that he was my boyfriend so my uncle wouldn't become suspicious." smiled Mac. I didn't want to pretend Mac thought to herself.
"Really, he never told me that part of the story. I guess his desire for you started from the beginning Sarah, ha, ha, ha ..... " Jordan pretending to be amused with this new info.
"Please Jordie, you know how he is. He likes a challenge. I had rejected him and all his charms in front of the Admiral and Bud. All he really wanted was to take control of the situation under his conditions." pleaded Mac hoping that Jordan would understand.
"You also have to understand that I looked like his dead girlfriend. He was going to ask her to marry him before she died. That was only a few months before we met. He was confused. He was thinking of Diane."
"So what did you do Ma'am?" asked Harriet. She was really enjoying this story. Bud had told her the story of how Harm and Mac met. Somehow she knew Bud miss all the interesting parts.
"You see Harriet, since we were after my uncle and his men, I was the one in control because my uncle would only deal with me. Harm thought that if my uncle believed that he was my boyfriend, then my uncle would be more willing to deal with him. He wouldn't need me then." explained Mac.
"So what did you do?" asked Carolyn.
"I wasn't going to let Harm walk over me that easily on the first case that we worked on together. So I pulled out my gun on Harm and told my uncle he was a government agent and not my boyfriend." replied Mac with a smug look on her face.
"I bet he wasn't too happy about that." commented Jordan with a smile. She knew Mac was right. Harm was a control freak. It wasn't easy for him to let others do things.
"No he wasn't, but all he did was smile. So I got to negotiate with my uncle about the return of the document he had stolen. My uncle was still hesitant because he was worried about me and my career.
Harm told him that there were always other choices and that he would defend him in court if he gave back the document. Even though my uncle was found guilty Harm did get him the lightest sentence possible. Harm earned my total respect that day." smiled Mac.
"But that's not the only thing that happen Sarah." alluded Carolyn.
"Really? What happen next?" asked Jordan curiously.
"Well two of my uncle's men rebelled and took my uncle and me prisoners. As my uncle was taking off in the helicopter, somehow Harm got loose from his ropes. He ran over to the helicopter and grabbed one of the landing struts as it was leaving the ground.
We were over 500 feet above the ground and he's fighting with one of the men to get into the helicopter as he's holding on with one arm." replied Mac quietly. It wasn't one of her pleasant memories, but it did tell her that Harm would do anything to keep her safe.
"What happen next Sarah?" asked Carolyn.
"I fought with the other man knocking him out with the butt of a rifle." replied Mac remorsefully.
"Oh No! What happen next?" asked Harriet.
"Harm managed to pulled the man he was fighting out of the helicopter and he fell to the ground below. I reach down to pull Harm into the helicopter.
He reached up and with a big flyboy smile on his face. He asked for permission to come aboard. I had to smile when he asked me for permission. I knew right then Harm was a very special squid." smiled Mac as a dreamy look came across her face.