So this is a new story. I got the idea for it while re-watching Inuyasha from the beginning. I want the chapters to be long so updates might be once a week. My main story is "Am I Too Late" a bleach fan fiction featuring Ulquiorra and Orihime. So check that out. This is rated MA in some areas but mainly M. I will clearly label where the MA begins and ends. Do not read if that stuff upsets you or you're underage.
I will only say this once,
I DO NOT OWN INUYASHA OR ANY CHARACTERS. THEY BELONG TO THEIR CREATORS.
Hope you guys enjoy.
If You Only Knew
Chapter 1- Always Her
It's always been about her. She was the pretty one, the smart one, the fun one. Nobody ever took a second look at me. I was forever in my sisters shadow. I wasn't without my qualities, but people just gravitated towards her so naturally. I wasn't jealous, I pitied her actually. She had all this pressure to be someone, she was just so fake that no one saw her true colors. But because no one bothered with me, I was free to do whatever I wanted. The only problem, I couldn't have who I wanted.
Inuyasha and I have been friends forever. But he always wanted Kikiyo. They had dated a little bit his freshman and sophomore year in high school, but she had ended it, and now he wanted her back. I could understand. I could relate to being heartbroken. I was heartbroken every time I looked at him. But, I was happy being his friend. It was enough. Now that I was a junior in high school, I had vowed to make a few much needed changes. I wasn't going to pine after something that obviously was never meant to happen.
Today, I was walking to the mall to go meet with Sango and her boyfriend. I didn't really want to hang out with Miroku. He was always kind of pervy. But Sango loved him and said he was only joking around. I liked him. He was cool. Just a little much sometimes.
As I was walking, I had my ear phones in listening to In This Moment. They were a rock/metal band with a female lead singer that could really belt it out. And don't get me started with the lyrics to some of their songs. Even from their old albums, they had a way of making you relate to the song in some way. Honestly, rock music has to be my favorite genre, but I listen to everything. Except rap. Rap I just… can't. Some are okay, I just can't listen to it all the time.
A few days ago, Inuyasha and I were in my room listening to music while I helped him with his math homework. Yes, I was a year under him, but he was hopeless when it came to math. Anyway, we were listening to 'Perfect' by My Darkest Days…
~FLASHBACK~
"Ugh. Some of their songs just hit the nail on the head." Inuyasha said, starting to sing along.
I was fine right before I met her.
Never hurt and nothing could control me.
You know I tried but I can't regret her.
She's the first. Ask anyone who knows me.
Terrified that she'd find my heart and break it.
Paralyzed by the thought of her with someone else.
I wish I woulda known.
I shouldn't have fallen in love with her.
It been nothing but trouble till now.
I shouldn't have fallen in love at all.
But I couldn't stop myself.
What gives her the right to tear up my life?
How dare she be so perfect.
What did I do to deserve this?
Never let her go, how dare she be so perfect.
"Don't tell me you're gonna be one of those lamos?" I laughed.
I just had to keep up with the act. I can't let him know how hurt I am. He's such an idiot. He was always blind to anyone and everyone except Kikiyo. He gave others attention, but his heart was with her and always would be.
"Hey. I'm not lame ok? It just sucks. I thought we were gonna go to prom, college, get married, a family. All of that. Guess we'll never know."
"Lame. Now pay attention or you're going to fail your math test tomorrow."
He was distracted as usual. I sighed to myself. Maybe one day, a guy will love me like he loves my sister. I laugh to myself. Yeah, like that'd ever happen. He would have to have a ton of brain damage. Or he would have to be blind. If someone didn't notice my sister, I'd probably die of shock. I spent 3 hours trying to get Inuyasha to pay attention, but the moment Kikiyo came home, I knew I lost the war. He left my room with barely a nod in my direction. Back to being invisible. Oh happy happy joy joy.
~END FLASHBACK~
I saw Sango and Miroku at the entrance of the mall. I waved to them to let them know I was here. I envied Sango. She was always noticed. Her dark brown hair going to the middle of her back, legs that never ended, hour glass shape. I always felt plain next to her. And today, she made me feel even more plain. She was wearing a black mini skirt, a shirt that had butterflies going up one side with lace over her cleavage and high heeled boots that came up halfway to her knees and that made her legs look even longer. Where I was wearing a black, form fitting shirt that had an angel wing on one side and blue jeans that I have deluded myself into thinking they made me look like I have an ass. I don't. At all.
"Hey Kagome. So, I have a surprise for you!" Sango approached me excitedly.
I eyed her suspiciously. This can't be good. It hardly ever is. Last time she had been this excited, I ended up being the laughing stock of the cafeteria. She had told me that someone wanted to talk to me, it was my sister. Who, then promptly, dumped her lunch tray all over me. I was mortified. Why she did it, I'll never know.
"Anyway. Inuyasha decided to come at the last minute. But that's not the surprise. You know Koga? The basketball player? Well apparently, he's been crushing on you for a while and I gave him your number."
Oh great. She's trying to set up her forever alone friend again. It never ended well. They always wanted to hang out with me to get to my sister. Or they were just creeps. But I liked Koga. He was cool, cute and funny. Maybe this wouldn't be such a bad thing. I thought, nodding to her. I did say I was going to make some changes and try and move on.
"Ok. Maybe I'll finally not be the third wheel." I joked.
"Aw. Is Kags finally getting a boyfriend?"
God. He has a way of sneaking up on me and scaring the shit out of me. But, in his defense, I was partially deaf from blaring my music just a minute ago. I turned to look at him. His amber eyes as captivating as ever, his silver hair shining in the sunlight, his dog ears as adorable as ever. A red t-shirt, and black baggy jeans suited him. As always, he looked like a god.
"Maybe. We will see if Koga even calls me."
Inuyashas eyes grew wide. He didn't like him. Everyone knew that. They were always going after one another in one way or another. They couldn't even be in the same class. Inuyasha and Koga almost always got into a fist fight whenever they could. I wondered how this was gonna work out. Just then, my phone gave off a little tweet. I got a text.
Hey Kagome. It's Koga. I was wondering if you wanted to go see a movie and maybe have dinner with me tomorrow night?
Sure. Sounds like fun. You pick the movie and I pick the restaurant. Sound good?
Yeah that sounds great. I'll pick you up at 7. See you tomorrow.
See yah
"So tomorrow night huh?" Inuyasha said, behind me.
"You know it's rude to read over someone's shoulders." I scolded.
He just shrugged and walked off. Typical. He's so rude. Sometimes, I didn't even know what I saw in him. But I'm used to it.
"So it's set up for tomorrow night. Now I just gotta figure out what to wear." I laughed, catching up to Sango, hooking my arms in hers.
"It's a good thing we're at the mall then." She giggled.
With that, we left the guys to follow behind us. We went to 5 different stores before I finally settled on a black dress with a red stripe going under to cleavage to the bottom of the dress, which came down to my knees halfway. I got a pair of heeled combat boots. I could wear them whenever, they're that awesome. Looking back, the guys were lost in their conversation. I wondered what they were talking about. It didn't matter. They weren't paying attention to us anyway.
~INUYASHAS POV~
I have been in love with her since the day I met her. I was just drawn to her. We have been friends since we were kids. She's always been there for me through everything. She was a force of nature. She was beautiful and she never noticed just how many guys wanted her. I would scare away most of them. She was totally dense when guys hit on her or even tried to flirt with her. I wanted her, but she never wanted me.
I had started dating Kikiyo a couple years ago, but I wasn't completely into it. And Kikiyo ended it, knowing I could never be who she wanted me to be. I couldn't be that guy to her. She couldn't stand that I was a half demon. She wanted me to be a full human. Kagome always accepted me for who I was. I was who I wanted to be for Kagome and for myself. And now, she was going on a date with Koga. I can't stand that guy. Why did it have to be him? Why did she want him and not me?
I watched the girls looking for a dress for her date. She looked amazing in everything she tried on. She could make a garbage bag look good. She was smiling and laughing. I could spend forever looking at her smile. I wanted to be the reason she smiled so brightly. I would do anything, give anything to see her smile. For the rest of my life.
But I messed it up. I dated her sister and now whenever I talked about a future, she thought I meant Kikiyo. I am such an idiot. How can I make this right? I wracked my brain for a solution. Nothing came to mind. I hated hearing her be so excited and happy about a date with another guy, it felt like a punch to the gut. Repeatedly.
I told Miroku that I'd be right back. Heading to the jewelry store, I had found the perfect present months ago. I just now saved up enough to pay for it. They had already engraved it for me too. It was a simple silver locket in the shape of a heart, on one side was a picture of me and the other side was her picture. The pictures were of us when we were kids. On the front of the heart it had "I LOVE YOU" and on the back "ALWAYS FOREVER". I knew she would like it. She doesn't like expensive, flashy things. And we always tell each other we love one another. I am the only one that means it romantically.
I headed back towards Miroku and the girls. Miroku was trying to sneak a peek into the fitting rooms. He's such a perv. I grabbed him by his shoulder and dragged him off, giving the girls privacy. If Sango had caught him, he'd be a dead man. I flinched for him, knowing her slaps hurt a lot. He sure knew how to pass her off. I almost felt sorry for him. Almost.
"What's the big idea? Are you trying to get yourself killed?" I asked him.
"My heart sings with any touch of hers. I cannot help myself but to gaze upon her beauty." He replied. "Surely you feel the same about Kagome."
Of course he would drag my feelings for Kagome into this. He thinks I'm a pussy for not getting the girl I loved. He got his girl, but only after a few years of constant bugging, well, courting. But he was bugging her. There was no living with either of them now. They were inseperable. And they were lovey dovey to the point of making anyone nauseas.
"You're one to talk. You annoyed Sango for years until she agreed to finally be your girlfriend." I snickered.
"At least I had the balls to go for the girl I wanted to be with." Miroku said. "You know she loves you back. Anybody with eyes can see that you guys love each other."
"Hey. Me and Kagome have been friends for a long time. I can't just ruin that because you call me a coward. And quit makin up lies." He was pissing me off.
"What's he a coward for now? Don't tell me he's going to try to get Kikiyo back." Sango popped up behind us.
"Yeah, I am so not helping with that one."
Oh great. Now she thinks I'm after her sister again. No Kagome, we are talking about you. Maybe I should just grow a pair and tell her. I just wished she would just get over her insecurities. She was amazing in her own right. She just couldn't see it.
"Hey! It's not like that!"
"Me doth think the lad protestith too much." Miroku said in a sing songy voice.
He's gonna die today if he keeps this up. How can he say things like that around her? Shes just gonna think everyones poking fun at her. She always did. After a couple more hours of walking around the mall, we decide to head home. I was going to walk with Kagome so I could give her my present I got for her. Sango and Miroku were gonna go do lord knows what.
The walk home was silent at first, I could only hear her blaring her music. I could hear it as though I was the one wearing the headphones. She was gonna go deaf if she kept her music up that high. She did love her music though. When she thought no one was around, she would belt it out and dance around. She was a talented singer, and a decent dancer. Ok, she sucked at dancing. She was horrible, but it made her happy. I felt the box with the locket in my pocket. I had to give it to her. So I picked her up bridal style, and took off into a run towards the park. It was her favorite place, under a weeping willow tree. Or to be more exact, in the weeping willow. She liked sitting up in the high branches, reading, listening to her music. If you couldn't find her, you just needed to look up.
"Hey! What's the big idea, Yash?!"
I ignored her yells of surprise. I made my way up the tree, picking a sturdy branch, I put her down. She looked up at me with her chocolate eyes, I could spend forever looking into them. I reached into my pocket for the locket, handing the box to her. I sat down next to her, pulling out her headphones. She looked at me and back at the box.
"Just open it already."
She nodded. Slowly opening the box like it was one of those prank snakes. When she had the box opened, her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped. I take it she likes it. I grabbed the locket and put the necklace around her neck. She looked beautiful with my present around her neck. The tiny silver chain against her ivory skin, the heart dipping down to just at her collarbone. I couldn't have picked a better gift.
"Thanks Yash. What'd you get it for? It's not my birthday for a few more months."
I ran my hand through my hair. What do I tell her? I can't exactly say I got it for her to show her how much she means to me. Maybe I am a pansy. My ears twitch back and forth on my head. I'm taking too long to answer her. Oh god why can't I just tell her?
"Meh. I got it for you because I saw it and thought it'd look good on you."
"Thanks again, Yash." She smiled up at me, wrapping her arms around me and giving me a kiss on my cheek. She felt so right in my arms.
"I love you, you know." I steeled myself for her response.
"I know. I love you too."
I looked at her. No. I mean I really love you, you dense girl. Why must you be so difficult? I sighed deeply, looking over the park. I guess it was time for me to come up with some sort of plan. I will make you understand just how much you mean to me, Kagome.
The next day
~KAGOMES POV~
I looked at myself in the mirror. I guess this will have to make do. I was wearing the black dress and heeled combat boots I bought the day before. I kept my hair down but had curled it slightly making it appear wavy. The make up I wore was light, natural colors that brought out my eyes, and lip gloss that gave my lips a dash of pink color. It would have to do. I was never one to wear make up anyway. I didn't want to be everyone else's version of pretty.
I was finished getting ready for my date with Koga. Now it was just a waiting game on if he would show up. He was already a half hour late. I checked my phone for any missed calls or messages. Nope. Nothing. I knew this would happen. I'm just that stupid girl no one wants to be around. I sighed to myself. Well now what am I going to do? My phone rang. It was Inuyasha. I quickly answered.
"Hey Yash. What's going on?"
"Figured I'd call and see if you needed a rescue yet."
"Funny you mention it. Koga never showed up."
"What'd you expect? He's a dumbass. So how about I pick you up and we go dancing? You know, karaoke, dancing, drinks. It'll be fun."
"OK. Might as well. I'm already dressed."
"Good. I'm outside. Hurry up and get out here."
Inuyasha hung up, and I grabbed my clutch with my fake ID. Apparently, I'm going to need it tonight. Inuyasha always seems to come to my rescue at just the right times. He was a god send. I didn't know what I'd do without him. When I stepped outside, there was Inuyasha waiting for me in all his godly splendor. He wore a red silk shirt, and black baggy jeans. A little more dressed up than usual. I touched the locket at my throat, my heart pounding for the man in front of me. His eyes grew wide and I did a little twirl, showing off my dress. I hoped he liked it.
We decided to walk instead of drive. We were going to be having a drink or two and it's always better to be safe than sorry. We talked about school, sports, the new Call of Duty that was going to be coming out. Yea, I play video games. And I'm pretty beast at them too. I was almost always on top of the lobby leaderboard. Inuyasha and I always competed to be on top. It was funny most of the time, till he tries going against me and he gets raped. (Raping in a video game is getting knifed from behind and winning matches with most or none of the opposite team going positive.) I was just too good for him to beat. It was at this time Inuyasha stopped walking and turned to me.
"Kagome. You look beautiful tonight. Well, all the time and I just…I need you to understand...I love you." He had a slight blush creeping up his cheeks. My heart stopped. Is he…serious? No, he's not. He's just saying that like he always does.
"I know. I love you too." I smiled up to him.
"No, you don't know."
He grabbed my arm and pulled me into his arms, crashing his lips to mine. It takes a minute for me to realize what's happening. He's kissing me?! Oh my god. I might just die right here, right now. I gain the courage to kiss him back. His lips feel soft and smooth against mine. He broke off the kiss, and looked into my eyes, as if searching for something.
"Now do you see?" he whispered.
So many thoughts ran through my head. What to think. What to feel. Should I be this happy or was he taking pity on me? My head was swimming with so many thoughts. I felt like I was soaring for a crash landing. It wasn't fair that he could have this affect on me. After standing around for a while, we started walking again. I quickly texted Sango to come meet us. I seriously needed to talk to her about what happened. Hopefully, she would understand the 911.
When we got to the club, we showed our ID's and walked in. The music was loud and I could feel the vibrations through my entire body. We headed to the bar and ordered our drinks. Inuyasha got a rum and coke. I got a root beer yummy. A little bit of Dr. Mcgillicuddy's vanilla and root 100, or root beer soda if you didn't want a full alcoholic drink, and a splash of cream. It tasted just like a root beer float. You couldn't even taste the alcohol in the drink, so it was dangerous to drink. But, I had Inuyasha with me.
While I waited for Sango, we danced. It was mainly me standing in the middle of the dance floor being jostled around my everyone else, but it was fun nonetheless. Inuyasha was a natural, he liked partying and being around people, it wasn't my scene but I was happy to be here with him. I was happy to be anywhere with him. I suddenly got grabbed from behind, shocked turning around I saw Sango and automatically gave her a hug. Pulling her away from the dance floor, she told Miroku to get her a drink. I dragged her to the only place to have a decently heard conversation, the bathroom.
"Oh my god, thank you for coming so quickly."
"Well you did say it was an emergency. What's up? What happened to your date with Koga?"
I gave her a quick run through of tonight's events. When I got to the part about Inuyasha kissing me, she was somexcited she was jumping up and down. She was squeezing the hell out of my arm, going on and on about how she was so happy for me. That Inuyasha finally came to his senses. We left the bathroom to find the guys. We couldn't see them anywhere.
"On second thought, let's just go dance. Come on." Sango said, quickly. Grabbing my arm to turn me around.
It was too late. I saw what she didn't want me to see. I was the biggest fool in the world. I didn't know she was here, but here she was, my sister in Inuyashas arms. They were kissing, he had her arms in his hands. I could feel my heart shatter into tiny pieces. I really was a fool. Nothing could ever change that. I ripped the locket from around my neck, breaking the chain. I didn't care. I threw it to the floor, turned and left. Sango calling after me, but I just ignored her. I needed to get out of here. It's always her. It's never me, it's just always her. She had everything I ever wanted, but could never have.
Cause if this is love, baby, I want out
I will light up the sky as we burn it down
I know you can't bear it, but let me say
Yes, I know it's better this way
If this is love baby I want out
My phone rang in my clutch. I laughed to myself. I really did pick the best ring tone for him. "I want out" by Young Guns. I hit ignore, only to receive another call shortly after. I hit ignore again and turned it off. I don't feel like talking to him. Not at all. Not ever again. I had had enough. More than enough. A girl could only handle so much heartbreak. I kept walking aimlessly for what felt like forever. After some time had passed, I headed home. It was way too late to be out at this time of night.
When I got home, I kicked off my shoes and headed up the stairs to my room. I closed the door behind me, starting to take off my dress. After I got on my pajama bottoms and a tank top, I noticed the locket Inuyasha gave me on my dresser. I picked it up, admiring it for a minute before putting it in my jewelry box. Why did he do that to me? Am I that easy? No. Only when it came to him. I pulled out my phone turning it back on. I sent a quick text to Sango letting her know I was home safe. I had 15 voicemails, I'm going to assume they're from Inuyasha. I ignore the voicemails, turning my phone on silent and putting it on my dresser. Crawling into bed, I close my eyes.
That's when the tears came. I couldn't hold them back anymore. It was just too much to handle. I berated myself for ever falling for a guy like him. I thought I knew him, but apparently, I didn't. Not at all. Not even a little bit. He was a hell of an imposter. That's when I felt a hand lightly stroking my hair. I looked up from the corner of my eye. It was the man of the hour. How dare he come in my room this late at night after what he did. I narrowed my eyes at him. I slapped him. And when he didn't do anything about it, I punched his chest close to a dozen times. Since he was a half demon, it probably felt more annoying than anything.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing here?! Kikiyo's down the hall, so just go fuck with her like I know you want to."
"I'm not leaving. What did you see?"
"Everything. You and her kissing. I left after that eye full."
"So you didn't see me push her away?"
I punched him as hard as I could. I think I broke my hand. I was very angry and hurt by everything that happened, I needed to let off some steam. He grabbed my arms and pinned them to the bed, getting on top of me, pinning me to the bed. He kept his weight off me by kneeling on his knees, but he was close enough that I couldn't move. He was too close.
"She kissed me and I pushed her away." He looked directly into my eyes.
"You're such a liar. You've always wanted Kikiyo. Ever since we were kids."
"No. You always assumed that. I always wanted you."
I looked at him. He can't be serious. This has to be some kind of trick or prank. It sounds exactly like something my sister would do. She would get some sick and twisted pleasure from something like this. I shake my head. I don't believe this. I must be dreaming, or losing my mind.
"Yo… you're… just lying to me! Why would it take you this long to tell me?"
"Because. I'm a coward and you deserve so much better."
He let go of one of my arms and cupped my face with his free hand. Lowering his head, he gave me my second kiss of the night. Only this time, it was more passionate, filled with an urgency to convey a world of feelings. I placed my free hand against his cheek. I was such a fool. Even if this was a cruel trick, I would gladly, selfishly, take whatever I could get from him for however long he would let me. I was a glutton for punishment. He ended the kiss, stroking my hair. He looked me in the eyes. I hoped he was sincere.
"I still don't believe you."
"That's why I'm going to spend everyday proving to you how much you mean to me." He said, kissing me again.
"Promise?"
"Promise." He grinned.
I'm going to hold you to that promise Inuyasha. Just please be careful. I've been in love with you since we were kids. I don't think I will ever love someone as much as I love you. Inuyasha moved to my side and curled up behind me. His lean, muscular arm around my waist, the other under my head to use as a pillow. We talked while he held me, until I fell asleep. I could get used to this.
Ok. Here is the first chapter. Yes it's demons, half demons and humans. They're just in our time. I simply just adore Inuyasha's puppy ears. That simple. Anyways. Questions, comments, and constructive criticism is always welcome. Thanks for reading.