Author's Note: Okay so hi guys. This is my first story and I'm really excited about it. But since it is my first story just bare with me and it would completely awesome if you could review! So clearly this concept if from the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. I love this movie and I love Jackie and Hyde so it just makes sense to put the two together. But I promise that I will try to make this Jackie and Hyde style the best that I possibly can. So there a few changes in my version of the story. It is based when Hyde, Eric, Donna, Fez, and Kelso are seniors and Jackie is a junior. In my version Donna still goes to Point Place High, Kelso and Jackie never dated, and Jackie's dad isn't in jail. Besides that I tried to keep everything That 70's Show original. Well anyways I hope you enjoy.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything. I do not own That 70's Show or How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. I do not own the characters or anything like that. If I did own it then I can promise you that season 8 would have a Jackie and Hyde wedding and there would be no strippers in the making of the show but whatever.
Chapter 1-The Bet
Point Place High School was like any other high school. It had its cliques: the jocks, the cheerleaders, the geeks, the band geeks, the burnouts, the misfits, the goody goods and so on. Everyone stuck to their little social groups and never strayed too far because it would have screwed up everything the small town kids knew and relied on.
But all of this changed when a certain preppy cheerleader princess and a Zen burnout rebel made a bet. They didn't know it then but their innocent yet challenging bet would forever change them and the whole function of Point Place High School.
It all started on December 15, 1977...
Jackie Burkhardt was considered one of the most popular, hottest, and richest girl at Point Place High, and she didn't let anyone forget that. Even if her life wasn't as perfect as she made it seem, but no one had to know that. And it was easy keeping her actual home life a secret since her so called "friends" were just a bunch of shallow cheerleaders who would back stab her the second they had ammunition. That's all Jackie knew and therefore assumed that's how all friends were so there was no reason to complain.
Jackie and her friends were sitting at the popular lunch table discussing who the Head Cheerleader should be next year. The Head Cheerleader now was Michelle Wellington who was the most popular and desirable senior that every guy wanted to do it with and every girl wanted to be her or hit her with a stick; depending on what time of the month it was. At least...almost everyone.
Jackie was a junior so it only made sense that she would become the Head Cheerleader next year. And she was determined as hell to get that title. She has been kissing ass to Michelle since she was announced Head Cheerleader last year and Jackie Burkhardt wasn't one to kiss ass but made an exception in this case. She has never wanted anything so much in her whole 17 years of living. If she became Head Cheerleader then she would be even more popular and more desirable than she is now and maybe her own mother would be proud enough to come home from her 5 month vacation in Mexico to see her, or her daddy would come to one of her games instead of just staying in his office with his 20 year old secretary. Just maybe...
"Ahem, Sally if you are finished smacking on that greasy cheeseburger then I can finish my sentence about who I am considering as the Head Cheerleader next year?" Michelle hissed at her so called best friend, Sally.
Sally blushed and nodded sheepishly as she put her cheeseburger down. Michelle smiled snobbishly and continued, "Perfect. Now as I was saying being Head Cheerleader is a very important responsibility and needs to go to someone who eats, sleeps, and breathes cheerleading" Jackie sat at the edge of her seat smiling like a 5 year old kid on Christmas morning. "Someone who is no uggo" Jackie Burkhardt "Who people will fear and never try to mess with the order of things" Meeee Jackie Burkhardt "And needs to be known as the most popular girl in Point Place." MEEE! JACKIE FREAKING BURKHARDT MEEEE! "And that person is obviously..."
Michelle couldn't finish her sentence because Rachel Zimmerman opened her big slutty mouth, "Oh well of course I will accept your offer as Head Cheerleader, Michelle. I mean who else would you give it to." Rachel said as giving Jackie the smuggest look in the history of Point Place High.
Jackie couldn't take it anymore, "No no no! You don't deserve to be Head Cheerleader! It's obviously going to be me. In case you haven't noticed Rachel," Jackie hissed her name with as much venom as her 95 pound body could. "Michelle did not say that the Head Cheerleader had to be the biggest slut at Point Place!"
"UHHH, Excuse me! You mousy little bitch! You're not exactly known for your virtue either"
"And who exactly have I lost my "virtue" to?"
"Oh, please Jackie everyone knows you totally did it with Brad in the janitor closet! You basically worship the ground he walks on!"
"I WOULD NEVER DO IT IN A JANITOR CLOSET!" Jackie yelled in her signature high pitch shrill voice. How dare this bitch think she would actually do it in a place where Yucky Carl the Janitor basically lived. "And I do not worship other people. They worship me. And I told you that I didn't sleep with Brad."
"Oh yeah? Then why did you walk out of the Janitor Closet with Brad and with your clothes all wrinkled and hair all out of place? Plus Brad told the whole football team that you guys did it! Are you calling Brad a liar? Are you calling Michelle's little beloved brother a liar? Huh, are you Jackie?"
'Danm it!' Jackie thought. There was no way that Jackie could tell them the truth. I mean maybe they would understand. Ha, who was she kidding? If Jackie told them what really happened in the janitor closet then everyone in Point Place High would know by the next day!
Jackie stared at Michelle and saw that she was waiting for an answer and Jackie had to think of something quick. "Rachel that's not the point. Michelle was trying to announce her final decision before you rudely interrupted her."
Michelle smiled, "Thank you Jackie. I did make my decision and it was one of you two," Michelle said as she pointed between Jackie and Rachel. "But now I think that maybe I was a little haste in my decision."
Jackie and Rachel's mouths dropped while all the other cheerleaders snickered. Michelle just smiled like the Evil Queen, "Rachel you need to learn to keep your umm legs close. I don't need to hear how I chose the sluttiest girl in Point Place to uphold my legacy as Head Cheerleader." Rachel actually looked like she was on the verge of tears, but Jackie couldn't help a half smile form on her face. However, that smile soon disappeared when Michelle switched her gaze from Rachel to Jackie.
"And Jackie, I don't appreciate how you would apply that my brother lied or even would want to deny being with him, because lets be real you aren't one to have boyfriends. You flirt and tease a lot but never commit, and that scares me. If you can't commit to a boyfriend than how can you commit to being Head Cheerleader."
Jackie could not believe that NOT being a slut would bite her in the ass. There is no winning for any girl in high school; you were either too much of a slut like Rachel or not enough of a slut like Jackie.
Jackie had to think quickly, "Michelle I am so sorry that I made those umm accusations about Brad. But there is a reason for why I don't stay too long with a boyfriend."
"Oh yeah, and what is that?" Michelle said while crossing her arms on her chest.
"Ummmm, you see I have this ummm rule that I can't date a guy for longer than 4 days because ummm I don't want them to fall in love with me. Because lets be real any longer than that and any guy would be obsessed with me! By day 7 they are basically a goner. Umm just like you Michelle! I mean Jason was basically head over heels about you only after 5 days." Jackie held onto her breath waiting for Michelle to respond.
"Mhm, and how exactly do you manage to get these guys not to fall in love with you. If you are so irresistible than just simply breaking it off with them cannot possibly be enough?"
"Well, Michelle that's easy! It's basically in every Cosmo ever made: "How to Lose a Guy." You know, you get really clingy, start talking about the future too soon, and take away their masculinity even though half the guys here cannot be considered men." Jackie babbled really fast, as she usually does when she's lying straight from her ass.
"Do you have one of these "How To" articles for us to see, Jackie?"
"Yeah, there should be one in my bag. But I don't see how this has anything to do with your decision about Head Ch..." Jackie was interrupted when Michelle spatted out "Are you questioning me, Jackie?"
"Of course not!" Jackie frantically searched in her unicorn backpack for her Cosmo and prayed it had a "How to" article inside of it. "Here it is." Jackie handed it to Michelle, who snapped it out of Jackie's tiny grasp and didn't even say thank you. But Jackie was too nervous to care.
All the cheerleaders herded over Michelle and looked for the article that Jackie based her dating philosophy on. A freshman spotted it and the girls started listing the bullet points.
"Ha, Karen no wonder Craig dumped you! Almost every one of these tips of how to keep your guy and you did the complete opposite of them" Sally mocked Karen. And basically every other cheerleader spatted out venomous comments like those. Jackie was too busy staring at Michelle, trying to figure out what she was thinking.
"Oh my god, number 7 says that by giving them a makeover is a deal breaker. Can you imagine one of the guys at our school with a makeover? I would love to see those pictures" a sophomore Paige gushed to Karen. But Michelle heard her comment and looked at Jackie with an evil grin.
"Girls, I think that we should make Miss too lovable Burkhardt prove that she is as committed to this squad as she says she is."
"I am! Michelle all I have ever wanted was to become the Head Cheerleader. I will do anything to prove it to you." Jackie said while holding her tears.
"I'm glad to hear that Jackie because you see a lot of people in this school have forgotten that cheerleaders rule this school and that we should be treated like royalty. So if Jackie is able to make an example of someone who is dumb enough to question my...I mean our power over the school then I will have faith that Jackie can lead the cheerleaders."
"Yes, fine! I will do it." Jackie said automatically.
"Good, but here are the rules. I have to choose your guy, you have to lose him in at least 7 days or at the most 10 days, document your days and find proof of the embarrassing things that you made him do, and then at the Christmas dance you tell the whole school how you made that sucker a pawn in our game." Michelle said with a revengeful tone that worried Jackie.
"Um okay I will do that." Jackie felt uneasy about making a fool of a poor guy that clearly made the bad decision in making Michelle Wellington his enemy. But she would get over it if it meant to beat that slut Rachel and more importantly become Head Cheerleader. "So who exactly is your victim...I mean choice for me?"
A couple of cheerleaders spat out names: "Ricky"..."Sam"..."nooo the guy who wears a lot of makeup"..."Jeremy..."
Michelle didn't look like she heard any of them. She stared across the cafeteria and had her gaze at her target, "Oh, I know exactly who to choose."
Jackie cocked her head to see who Michelle was looking at. She was staring at the table of misfits who seemed like they didn't have anything in common except for their occasional red, puffy eyes. There was the skinny kid, the foreign one, the red headed girl who wore too much plaid, the pretty boy, and the scruffy rebel.
'Oh, I hope it's the clueless, pretty one.' Jackie thought even though she knew exactly who Michelle was talking about. 'Crap!' was Jackie's last thought until Michelle said his name.
At the same time on the other side of Point Place High Cafeteria
"Uhhhhhh! Donna why has everyone seen your boobs but me? It's not fair!" Kelso pouted.
"Man, shut up and stop acting like a baby!" Hyde said annoyed.
Kelso can be so dumb sometimes that it made Hyde wonder why he was friends with him. Then he remembered that Kelso's stupidity usually made a good laugh for Hyde. Plus, he knew that the gang wouldn't be the same if any of them were missing.
Besides Kelso, there was Fez; the foreign kid who was sometimes a little bit too much of a perv for Hyde's taste and that's saying a lot cause I mean Hyde is a horny 18 year old, but Fez was fun to hang around.
Hyde had his best friend, Eric, who was really more like his brother. He had his quirks like his stupid Star Wars obsession but the group would fall apart without the skinny spaz.
They had Donna who was the incredibly hot chick that hung around with the losers because she was cool and not like the other stuck up girls at Point Place. For a long time Hyde once thought that he and Donna would have worked out but she belonged with Eric. And that was cool with Hyde because he had no time for serious relationships and never wanted them; so he never did.
And Hyde, well he was just the Zen kid who was always wearing his aviators and didn't trust the government. Besides that, Hyde never said too much so no one expected him to say anything, which is how Hyde liked it.
"Kelso stop being a dillhole! Aren't you dating Pam Macy? Or did you guys break up for the hundredth time again?" Donna said pissed.
"Just because I am dating Pam doesn't mean I can't stare at other girls boobs! Geez Donna!""
"Man, all of you guys suck! Are all guys crappy boyfriends?" Donna started beating her food with her fork and looked majorly pissed.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Hyde asked. Trying to figure out how he got involved into this. "Danm it, Foreman what did you do now?"
"Nothing, man! Donna what's wrong?" Eric asked scared of her answer
"What's wrong? What's wrong? Eric you can be such a dillhole sometimes! How about how you haven't told your parents yet about our engagement? How about how you weren't man enough to tell your parents on Thanksgiving like you promised? You should be parading me at your house and telling your parents how god danm happy you are to be with me and they can go to hell if they don't approve. And the rest of you guys aren't any better! Kelso is a cheating bastard. Yeah, I know its Pam Macy and she's a bitch but she doesn't deserve to be cheated on! And fez you only want a girlfriend so you can get in her pants and free candy. How about being with a girl because you love her or at least care about her? And Hyde you don't even bother yourself with girlfriends. You just sleep with them and then ditch them. I bet you don't even know how to be in a relationship yet actually be in love with a girl! So like I said ALL OF YOU GUYS SUCK!"
When Donna finished all of the guys didn't know what the hell to say. Fez looked scared as hell, Kelso looked confused, Eric looked like a mix between guilty and scared, while Hyde just looked mad.
Hyde figured Donna was doing that thing when she was being a girl; you know venting out their feelings and shit like that. Donna didn't really have any friends who were girls so occasionally the guys had to take her random outbursts. But this time Donna went too far by saying that Hyde couldn't be in a relationship.
"Ummm, Donna I'm sor..." Eric started but couldn't finish his apology because Hyde cut him off.
"Look, man I don't know what crap you and Foreman are going through but don't drag me into it. I can be with a chick for longer than one night, Alright Donna! I just choose not to because I don't want to deal with their PMS crap like how Foreman has to deal with yours!" Hyde spatted and everyone's eyes just widened.
Kelso yelled, "BURN!""
While Fez cowered lower in his seat and said, "Aiiiiii."
"Man, Nooooo!" Eric screamed at Hyde.
"My PMS crap? You know what Hyde you can go to hell!" Donna was starting to get up to leave from her seat when Eric grabbed her arm.
"C'mon Donna! Hyde didn't mean it. Right Hyde?" Eric asked hoping that Hyde would just agree for Eric's sake. But Hyde just sat in his seat with his arms crossed and just staring at Foreman with a blank expression.
"Typical Hyde. Just sit there acting like you don't give a crap. When the truth is you are just too much of a pansy to admit that I was right. You know what it's probably best that you don't get with a girl because you wouldn't even know how to treat her right. God you are just like Bu..." Donna stopped herself when she realized what she was just about to say.
But she didn't have to finish her sentence because everyone knew who she was going to say.
Hyde's whole body stiffened when he realized who Donna was going to mention. Was she really going to say that he was like his good for nothing father? Hyde could be an asshole and didn't like sharing his feelings but he was nothing like Bud. He would never abandon his kids or the mother of his child and he sure as hell wouldn't lay a hand on his...No danm it.
"Why don't you finish what you started Pinciotti? Tell me how I am just like Bud. Cause that's who you were going to say, right? C'mon, I dare you."
"Look Hyde I'm sorry. I just...it's just. I guess I took my frustration out on you." Hyde thought it was finally over but then Donna started talking again. Man, chicks just don't know when to quit it. "But you have to admit you have never had a steady girlfriend and have never even tried. I know you say you don't want one but one day you might and if you don't start now then you may never know how to treat a girl. And I think that's a real shame because then you won't ever know what it's like to be in love." Donna said her last statement while looking at Eric all lovey dovey.
"Awe Donna shucks" Eric said in his sarcastic yet loving way to Donna. Soon they were making out and it was disgusting the crap out of Hyde.
"Whatever man. I know I can totally get any girl and keep her if I really wanted to."
Donna parted from Eric and smiled at Hyde, "Oh yeah? You wanna bet on it?"
"A what?" Hyde was scared where this was going.
"You heard me. A bet. What? Is the great Zen master actually a big chicken?" Donna said knowing that the last word would get to Hyde.
"BURN!" Kelso said with his signature smile.
"I am not a chicken, Pinciotti. But what kind of bet are we talking here?"
"Okay tough guy. I bet that you cannot find a girl and stay with her for more than 3...no 7 ...no not until the Christmas dance which is ten days away." Donna said with a grin on her face thinking that Hyde would back out.
"Fine." was all Hyde said.
Everyone looked at Hyde dumbfounded because none of them actually thought that he would agree to something so un-Hyde like.
But Donna saw this as an opportunity. "Okay but there are rules."
Hyde scoffed "Ha, there always are with you chicks. Alright let's hear them."
"You have to start dating her by tomorrow and last until at least the Christmas party. She cannot be any girl you have done it with before. Hell, actually I have to pick her. And you have to take her on at least two dates besides the dance. Do we have a deal?"
'Hell freaking no' was all Hyde can think in his head but he couldn't back down now. Hyde finally grunted, "Fine but I have conditions too. She can't be an uggo or one of your feminist friends. And if I win you have to do something." Hyde said with a smirk.
"And what would that be?"
"If I make it with the chick till Christmas then you have to...you have to..." Hyde was completely stuck. He had no idea what he could make Donna do without sounding to much of an ass but yet would be as humiliating as what he was just about to do. And then he finally got it. Hyde smirked devilishly. "You have to be our" pointing to each of the guys in the gang, "personal slave for 10 days. Do whatever we say without question" Hyde noticed Eric looked panicky, "except for anything pervy" both Fez and Kelso pouted while Eric looked relieved. "Unless you want to." Hyde finished hoping that Donna would back down.
Donna's eyes widened at Hyde's conditions. She couldn't believe what he actually just said and she wanted to just say no but then he would win. And Donna had too much pride for that. But man was she going to make him pay. "Fine!" Donna said.
"Oh this is going to be good." Kelso said.
"This sounds dirty so I approve." Fez said
"I don't think this is a good idea but you guys never listen to me anyway so good luck man." Eric said nervously.
Hyde cursed himself for agreeing to this but he usually made bad decisions so why should today be any different. "Alright, let's just get this over with. Who is the chick going to be?"
Donna honestly had no idea who to pick. She scoped out the cafeteria who met both her and Hyde's conditions but who would also give Hyde hell. 'Hmm Katie is in the drama club, but Stacey did get all lovey dovey with her boy toys. Danm it none of these girls are what Hyde deserves,' Donna thought.
She finally spotted the cheerleader table and had the best evil idea ever. Now all she had to do was pick the perfect cheerleader to give Hyde hell. That's when a tiny brunette caught her attention because she looked like she was walking towards the table but then stopped and ran back to her minions. She knew exactly who the girl was and her reputation. Oh Hyde was going to pay!
Donna was smiling and Hyde figured that she was looking at the chick she was going to choose. Hyde turned around and saw she was staring at the cheerleaders table. "You wouldn't!" Hyde exclaimed.
"Oh but I would Hyde!" Donna said.
Back at the Cheerleader's table
"Steven Hyde" Michelle said with an evil grin on her face.
Jackie heard a mixture of responses: "Ewww he's got a beard."….."Who?"…."Oh my god he is so hot!"…."His name is Steven? I just always thought Hyde was his first name?"…"I thought he was in jail?"….."Oooo a bad boy!"…"The one who is always wearing those cheap sunglasses?"
But for once Jackie was completely speechless. She would never go for a guy like Hyde. I mean he was pretty cute if you look behind all his scruffiness but he was too complicated for Jackie. She wasn't sure what his deal was since he was always wearing those glasses. Plus she knew that he was known to just bang and leave. Danm it.
But Jackie tried to play it cool. "Okay Steven Hyde it is."
"Well what are you waiting for? Now, Jackie!" Michelle ordered.
Jackie's eyes widened as if she was a deer caught in headlights. "Now?" Jackie asked sheepishly praying that she misheard Michelle. But Michelle simply nodded.
All the girls were staring at Jackie. So she spun around and started taking baby steps to where Steven was sitting but then stopped when she saw the red head stare right at Jackie. 'I can't do this.' Jackie thought and ran back to the Cheerleaders table.
Back to the gang
"Hyde your new girlfriend will be no other than the spoiled, rich, won't shut her mouth, cheerleader; Jackie Burkhardt." Donna said looking quite pleased with herself and at Hyde's reaction.
"Awe man Donna she's really hot! I wanna do it with her!" Cried Kelso.
"Hyde you are going to be dating a goddess. You lucky bastard!" Fez said.
"Okay, Donna maybe that's going a bit too..." Eric stopped talking when Donna gave him 'if you don't stop talking you are not having sex tonight mister' look. Eric just looked down and said "Sorry man," to Hyde.
Hyde wanted to figure out something about this chick that broke one of the rules but he came up with nothing. Jackie was certainly no uggo. In fact she was probably the hottest girl at Point Place High in Hyde's opinion, although he would never admit that. And she was definitely no feminist, that girl practically screamed-marrying a guy for his money and using that money to pay for maids so she could lounge by the pool.-Hyde never said that she couldn't be a cheerleader even though he really should of, especially since his last encounter with a cheerleader.
Hyde finally broke his silence and muttered, "Danm it." And started walking toward the danm cheerleader's table but he stopped when he saw Jackie turn her head and look at him. He panicked and made a quick left to the cafeteria line. Maybe chocolate pudding would make this day less crappy.
Back at the Cheerleaders Table
Jackie was just going to say that she couldn't do it, at least not with Steven Hyde but before Jackie could get a word out, Michelle beat her to the punch. "Jackie if you can't do this simple task at all then I have no choice but to kick you off the cheerleader's squad COMPLETELY." Michelle said as she towered over Jackie.
Jackie could feel her heart stop when she heard those words come out of Michelle's mouth. So with no other threatening words needed Jackie turned back around to walk over to his table, when she saw he was already half way to her. The second she looked up at him he turned straight to the cafeteria line.
'Weird.' Jackie thought. But just shrugged that thought out of her mind and went straight after him.
Cafeteria Line
It was the middle of lunch so no one was on line and Hyde had a few seconds to compose himself after he freaked out and bolted out of this ridiculous bet that Donna created just to piss him off. Hyde saw the last chocolate pudding and went to go grab it. Just as he was about to take it, a tiny hand was placed on top of his over the pudding cup.
Hyde looked over and saw it was no other than Jackie Burkhardt.
"Hi." Jackie said while batting her eyes.
"Hey." Hyde said with his mysterious zen tone.
Both smiled believing that they were the one in control and thought:
'Oh, Steven Hyde I am going to make you wish you never met me.'
'Ha Jackie you are totally gonna fall hard for me.'