Guess who's back with a multiple chapter story? :) It's very different from what I've posted before, but I hope you still like it.
Were crushes supposed to be nerve-racking? Before Slade, she wasn't capable of making relationships- much less romantic ones. All her mistakes and accidents kept her running so much that attaching to others was never an option. She hadn't even known Beast Boy long enough to decide if she would date him though they were fast friends.
She corrected her thoughts. She learned she could never date him when he told everyone her secret.
But now, here she was. It was the first time in a few years that she had somewhere to stay and she had stayed long enough to learn about the one other person she was living with. And somewhere along the polite greetings and endless training and short conversations, she had grown from being uneasy in fear to uneasy with butterflies.
He would walk by and she would dart her eyes in a constant confusion as to if she was gawking at him or avoiding him. He would readjust her stance in training and her heart would thump in her ears. He would talk about something, anything, and the stupid teenage voice in her head would rise up. He's talking to me. Maybe he likes me.
But then he would walk away and she had to call bullshit on her hopeful thoughts.
If someone asked her why she had a crush on Slade, she wouldn't even have a good explanation. Besides the obvious changes in the way her heart raced or her stomach fluttered, there was no, "I like him because of this," or "I think he's great because of that." It was just there. It wasn't a decision or a progression. It sprung on her and she was stuck with it.
Liking your master who was decades older than you wasn't exactly an ideal situation, but the excitement that came with it was enough for her to wave off what was wrong about it. The adrenaline rushes and hope that she had never felt before was addicting and she embraced the high. During the day, she would let it fill her system on the subtle interactions, trying to push their conversations longer, trying to learn more about him. At night, she would toss and turn at what she was doing to her head. He's not going to love you. He's not going to care about you like that. What do you have to give to him?
She admitted to doing a lot of weak things. She considered this pining one of the worst.
And yet, well, here she was. Following him like a puppy, obeying all his rules, disobeying them when she wanted attention. He would never notice- she would die of embarrassment if he ever noticed- but it was enough. Attaching like this to someone like she never had before even if the feelings weren't shared. It was enough for someone as lonely as her.
Plans did not go accordingly and that made him more fret more than anything. The original outline of his ideas were basic and simple and impossible to stray from: (1) convince Terra to work for him, (2) train her enough that she could control her powers, (3) send her to spy on the Titans, and (4) annihilate the Titans. Complicated steps yes, but he knew that if he could manage it, the world would be in his hands.
Nothing had gone wrong. But what came to be of this plan made him fear the safety of the rest of it.
Step one was no problem, but that was when he barely knew Terra. When she was just a girl he watched destroy the world and meant nothing to him in terms of a person. But as step two started, he slowly came to realize that turning this girl into his weapon would take more control of his heart, not just his power. The subtle things she did: the way she darted her eyes, her fragile smile, the way she tried to initiate conversation without quite knowing what to say. At first it was annoying, but as time went on and she became a person instead of a killing machine, he learned to be interested in the way she was.
Please review! I sort of have an idea as to where I'm going with this, but not a very solid one.