Manny stared out the small, oval window at the clouds that threatened snow. It had been over a year since she'd seen clouds like that. She sighed at the realization that for the first time in five years, she was going to have a white Christmas. That was the worst thing about L.A., no snow.
The pilot came on announcing that they'd be landing in just a few minutes and that everyone should return to their seat and fasten their seatbelts. Manny put up the fold down tray in front of her and clipped it into place before buckling her seatbelt and preparing herself for the landing. She wasn't a big fan of flying and the landing was always the worst part.
Once the plane was firmly on the ground, she made her way down the terminal and into the airport. She scanned the crowd for her parents but spotted instead a very familiar blonde grinning from ear to ear, a cardboard in her hands with Manny's name spelled out in big, bold, black letters. Manny laughed, crossing the crowded platform and embracing her friend.
"It's about time you brought your famous butt back home," another familiar voice teased.
Manny pulled away to find herself looking into the blue eyes of Sean Cameron. She'd heard that he made it back from Iraq safe and sound the previous year and had popped the question to Emma. Manny picked up her best friend's hand and stared at the rock on her ring finger.
"I'm so happy for you guys," she enthused with a genuine smile, though there was a small tug on her heart at the emptiness her own love life had acquired.
"You'll have to promise to come home for the wedding. You have to promise to be my maid of honor," Emma insisted, linking elbows with her best friend.
Manny chuckled, slinging her carry on bag over her shoulder, "I wouldn't dream of missing it."
"Let's go get the rest of your bags," Sean interrupted, stepping aside and letting the two girls lead the way arm in arm.
Outside the weather was freezing, which wasn't a big surprise for December in Toronto. There were several inches of snow on the ground and the snow clouds had already begun their assault as flurries began to flutter down.
"We're over here," Sean said, motioning to a dark SUV parked in the loading zone.
Manny followed her old friends to their car and loaded her luggage into the trunk before climbing into the backseat. Emma slid in next to her and Sean followed several seconds later, putting the key into the ignition and starting the car.
"It really is good to have you home," Emma replied. "I've got so much to tell you and I could really use your help on some of the wedding planning. You're back for two weeks right?"
Manny nodded, grateful to be surrounded by old friends. She hadn't realized how much she missed her best friend's smile or the way that Emma's face lit up when she caught Sean's eyes in the rearview mirror. It was nice to be home.
"How are your Mom and Mr. Simpson?" Manny asked, leaning her head over on Emma's shoulder they way she'd often done when they were growing up.
"Good, although they've got their hands full with Jack. He got in trouble three times at school last week and broke one of the neighbor's windows with a rock. I swear I don't know where he gets it from."
"Toby's teaching at the school now," Sean added, he's eyes switching quickly from the road to the rearview mirror then back again. "He's helping Mr. S with the media immersion classes."
"And Liberty just got back from Seattle. She brought pictures of little J.T., which isn't his real name but if you could see the pictures you'd understand why we call him that. I swear, Manny, he's the spitting image of J.T."
Manny smiled fondly at the mention of her old friends and the flood of memories that came rushing back. She had her complaints about her past, about her childhood but she wouldn't have changed her group of friends for anything.
"Darcy and Peter got married," Emma continued. "But I'm not sure that's going to last. I saw him at a French restaurant in downtown Toronto with Heather Sinclair's little sister just last week and they didn't look like they were discussing business."
"And Spinner owns The Dot now." Sean added.
"Wow! It sounds like everyone's doing well," Manny replied, her head reeling from all the information being thrown at her.
"Mostly everyone…" Emma offered with a weak smile, her brown eyes meeting Sean's in the rearview mirror. A silent message that Manny wasn't privy to. Emma bit into her lip, a sure sign that the news to come wasn't good then softly added, "Craig had a relapse. He's back in rehab but this time he's in Toronto."
Craig. She hadn't heard his name mentioned in over a year. He made it back to Toronto right before her graduation but he didn't come back for her, he came back for Ellie. At the time she didn't care. She was in a whirlwind relationship with Jason Hogart and had barely given Craig's reappearance a second thought.
Then about a year ago she saw a poster in one of L.A.'s elite clubs about an upcoming concert featuring new rising star Craig Manning but she forced herself to stay away. He had broken her heart on more than one occasion and with Manny's life finally coming together and her acting career taking off, she feared another encounter with Craig would throw it off its axes.
"Manny?" Emma questioned, concern creasing her blonde brow.
"I can't say I'm too surprised." Manny replied with a soft, sad smile. "He never was very good at making good decisions."
"He's not with Ellie anymore," Emma hedged, ignoring the warning glare Sean was shooting at her reflection. "Ellie's actually dating Jay which was a complete surprise to all of us."
Manny's brow arched in disbelief. Ellie and Jay, now that was an awkward pairing! "I thought Jay was dating Mia," she added.
"They broke up last year. She said she was tired of waiting around for a commitment."
"If that's what she was waiting for then she was definitely dating the wrong person," Manny chuckled.
Emma nodded in agreement. She warned Mia a number of times about Jay's wandering eye and commitment issues. They had been the same lectures she'd given Manny in high school when she'd gone down that road herself.
Manny turned her attention to the window and the scenery flying by outside it, as memories of her past flashed behind her eyes. Her first date with Craig that she'd thought had been so perfect but looking back now had really been a disaster. She thought about the abortion and how disappointed Craig had been, about his surprise visit at the end of her junior year and then his return a few months later with an addiction that had changed him into someone she didn't recognize, someone she didn't like very much. And still there was a part of her heart that still held him on a pedestal, that still remembered him as that gawky, curly haired teen that had snuck her and Emma into the grade eight dance.
"He asked about you," Emma offered, drawing Manny's attention back to the conversation.
"Who?" she asked, shaking the fog from her memory away.
"Craig. He asked about you." Emma explained, searching her friend's soft brown eyes for a reaction.
"Craig and I were over a long time ago, Em. I can't go there again. I won't." Manny insisted.
"But Manny…"
"Emma," Sean warned from the front seat.
"Fine," Emma sighed, sinking back against the seat. "I just thought you might drop by and see him, you know, in the spirit of the holidays."
-0-0-
Manny sat in her old bedroom, still painted light pink from her childhood, listening to the sound of her mother humming as she prepared their Christmas Eve feast. Manny should have been helping but she'd gotten distracted by a box of old photographs that were now strewn out on the floor in front of her, pictures of her, and Emma, and J.T. at the park when they were five. Then another picture several years later with Liberty and Toby added into the group and of course pictures from all the various school dances and spirit squad events that she had made it a priority to attend. At the bottom of the box was a picture of her and Craig taken right after they'd gotten back together junior year, the youngsters in the photograph looked so in love, so crazy in love that it was hard to believe they would end up the way they had.
Manny ran a finger along the jaw line of the Kodak Craig, a million what if's running through her head. The funny thing about first loves is that they tend to stick with you, long after the relationship disolves. She carefully placed the pictures back in the box with the exception of the Craig one then put the lid back on and slid it back under her bed before standing up.
"Mama," Manny called as she made her way into the kitchen. "I have to step out for a few minutes but I'll be back in time for dinner."
Her mother nodded, "Just be sure to be back before four Manuela. You know how your Papa gets if it isn't served right on time."
Manny smiled fondly. She use to hate the way her parents ran on a precise schedule dinner at four sharp, bed before eleven. Growing up it had driven her crazy but now it was definitely nice to be home.
She kissed her mother's cheek then slid into her jacket before heading out of the small apartment and down the street to the bus stop on the corner. She caught the number four across town to the rehab center Emma had managed to drop the name of five times in the last week.
The brick building looked nothing like she expected. It reminded her more of a home than a center for troubled adults. The inside smelled of cinnamon and gingerbread, a large, decorated, tree stood in the center of the room giving it a more homey feel.
"Can I help you?" a dark haired female asked with a warm, friendly smile.
"Yes," Manny replied, taking several steps closer and returning the lady's smile. "I'm looking for Craig Manning, he's a patient here."
The woman nodded, picking up a phone and calling for Craig over a loud speaker that echoed off the white washed walls. Manny's cheeks flamed embarrassment at the announcement and she began to second guess her decision.
"I told you, you couldn't live without me Karen," Craig's flirtatious voice teased, drawing Manny's attention away from her embarrassment and over towards Craig's familiar face.
"Manny," he asked in shock. "What…I…I thought you lived in L.A."
Manny smiled uneasily, "I do. I'm home for the holidays and Emma told me you were here."
Craig nodded, stepping closer and taking in Manny's familiar presence. "It's good to see you," he added.
Manny swallowed the lump in her throat as Karen, the receptionist, cleared hers and pointed to a spring of mistletoe hanging above their heads. Her eyes met Craig's, his tongue tracing the thin line of his lips and she inadvertently took a step forward tilting her chin up.
He kissed her softly, his hands cupping her face in tender affection and Manny was transported to a time when their relationship had been good, when their love had been innocent and pure, when it had been enough. She kissed him back winding her gloved fingers into the fabric of his tee shirt and savoring the moment. In the spirit of the holiday, what was the harm in a little kiss?