This is my Christmas present to the fandom. Special shout out to all of those who encourage me often. I know how you all feel about babies so here is a fic where Harvey and Donna have a newborn. There is a lot of family drama, a little bit of cute moments between Harvey and Donna, & comedy ensues.
James Gordon Specter was born at 3:37am on December 2nd, 2013, weighing in at 7lbs and 1oz.
December 23rd, 2013
The blinker illuminates the dash and the tick sounds in a steady rhythm as Harvey turns into the neighborhood of Donna's parent's house. The neighborhood is so bright that Harvey almost considers reaching for his sunglasses even though the sky is dark, but he doesn't. He squints in an attempt to shield his eyes while still looking at the road.
Donna catches him and: "you're squinting. You need glasses."
"It looks like Santa threw up on the whole damn neighborhood," he counters. "Shit." The words have barely left his mouth when the back of Donna's hand has smacked into his arm. He shoots a narrowed gaze in her direction but is adamant about keeping his eyes on the snowy street in front of him.
Her palm presses against his khakis and slide towards his knee, "watch your mouth."
"Excuse me, Miss, Goddamn It You Bastard," he mimics the words that he's heard directed at him too many times to count over the last few weeks. "I didn't realize we were on a verbal cleanse."
"If you swear in front of my mother she will try to steal our son," Donna warns.
Harvey chuckles and for a moment she appreciates his laughter. She remembers a time when he barely laughed at all and how it used to burn in her chest even after the work day had ended and she was home alone in her apartment. His laughter comes easier now, but so does his arrogance. Even that is softer somehow. She wonders if maybe it was like for him the way it was for her - if the gratification of being with her touched his very soul.
He side eyes her and grins in that way that etches onto her skin. "Bring it on."
"She's stolen children before," Donna teases.
Harvey laughs again, softer this time, "you're making your mother sound like a very scary person."
"She's terrifying," she counters.
He stops at a stop sign in front of her parents' cul de sac and looks at her, "I could believe it."
"I know what you're implying but I'll choose to ignore it this time," she says with finality.
"Such a forgiving woman," Harvey comments.
She rolls her eyes in return, he doesn't have to look at her to know that. He's always been impressed by how well she knows him, but she doesn't know how well he knows her. Sometimes he likes to keep that a secret and surprise her. She's always able to mask her surprise but he can still tell.
"Which one is theirs?"
She sighs heavily and reverberates in her chest, "the one that looks like the elves decorated."
He can't tell if the sigh indicates embarrassment on her parents' behalf or annoyance at him. He thinks he'll chalk it up to embarrassment just to push the envelope a little bit. He always has liked living dangerously.
He pulls into her parents' driveway, taking note that they are the last ones to arrive, and wonders if they were saving that spot in the driveway just for them or if it was saved for something else. He releases a breath he doesn't know he's holding as he shifts a gaze towards her, his face lit up with multi-colored light bulbs hanging off of the house. She hasn't yet noticed him staring and it's in the moments where he feels invisible that he feels like he's the luckiest. A year ago his life was totally different.
A year ago, he and Scottie had just broken up. Donna was barely speaking to him. Of course she was doing her job and she was doing it just as well as she always had, but that familiarity was different. The simple things between them were missing and he didn't know how to get them back. In the course of deciding to try having a kid together and actually succeeding, they managed to fall in love with each other. Or maybe they managed to unveil a love that had always existed between them.
Christmas last year had been welcoming even though he wasn't attached to the family. Christmas last year had been them revealing the news that they were going to try to have a kid together and having to listen to her entire family tell them how it was a horrible idea. He supposed that this year will be when they tell them that they live together, that they're together - everything that her family has been telling her should happen but hasn't.
Or, hadn't. Not yet anyway. He can't wait to hear what they have to say this time.
The car is barely parked before Donna's mother is running towards it. Okay, she isn't quite running but she has a pretty good pace going for an old lady. She isn't that old but Harvey likes to poke fun at her age anyway. Of course this is all done the right way – behind her back and to Donna's face. He isn't an idiot when it comes to women. Besides, Donna would kill him if he said anything to make his family not love him.
"I thought we were past the awkward dating stage," he mumbles.
Donna unbuckles her seat belt and cracks her car door. "I guess we're about to find out."
"Oh joy," he grunts. He looks at her with a narrowed gaze, which seems to direct her attention towards him. The question settles on her lips, but it never passes in the air between them. "I wish you would let me help you."
Donna rolls her eyes, "I'm fine, Harvey. It's been three weeks."
"You still can't have sex," he mutters in annoyance.
She nearly punches him. "One more week. You're so impatient."
He shrugs and grins. "I'm a man who knows what he wants and I want it now."
"You always want it. You're a dad now," she points it, "about time you learn some self-control."
"But there's this really attractive woman I work with," he reasons.
"She just had a baby."
"She's still hot," he argues.
"You're clearly delusional," she laughs.
He sighs and shakes his head, but grins in spite of himself. Donna's mother practically peels the car door on Donna's side over. Donna's father hovers in the doorway like he can't decide if he wants to share his wife's enthusiasm or just blow it all off. Harvey knows what it's like to deal with a Paulsen woman every day but he's sure that the two women couldn't be more different.
Donna, unlike her mother, was reluctant to have children. She honestly wasn't even sure that it was something that she wanted until she realized that it was almost too late. She approached her friend Harvey with a proposal, one that would tie their lives together until the day that one of them dies. Harvey can't even explain the whirlwind of the last year, but most of the events were extremely unexpected.
"Donna Evelyn Paulsen, you are on the list," Donna's mother barks in way of greeting.
Donna sighs. "What list is that, Mom?"
"You know exactly what list I'm talking about, young lady, and don't think I'm going to say it in front of the baby."
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Donna insists.
"You don't even tell us that you had the baby until almost three weeks after-" her mother looks so mad that from the other side of the car Harvey nearly falls out of the cracked door, "I could strangle you. I can't believe that you did this to me – to us! Your father is so upset about this that he can't even come out here."
Donna looks up at her father and sees him laughing. She isn't even amused by this. "Congratulations. You're a grandmother again."
"Don't be coy with me."
"You don't even want to say hello to the father of my child?"
The older Paulsen woman paints a smile on her face just for his benefit, "hello, Harvey."
"Hello, Evelyn," he replies, giving her a smile wave.
"Can we get out of the car, please, Mother?" She asks. Donna tosses Harvey an eye roll and he just shrugs in response.
Her mother begrudgingly takes a step back to make room and almost immediately peeks into the back seat of the car. Evelyn's face presses against the glass in an effort to get a good look at the baby. Donna is already so done with the line of questioning and there is going to be so much more before the holiday is over.
The house that she grew up in is lined with clear icicle lights, a snowman display on the right side of the front yard and Santa's sleigh on the left side. Their house, as long as Donna can remember, has always been the brightest in the cul de sac. They only want to spread the cheer. Her parents have always adopted joy and cheer around the holidays, no matter how bad things in their life have been. Even as a kid, Donna remembers it being that way.
Her parents could be on the verge of splitting up but the Christmas season always renews their vigor for life and for happiness. It almost always as though the arguments that built between them over the months had never even existed. Donna always envied that kind of relationship, the kind that withstands everything because they are two people who can be happy and excited. That's why Donna tries to find excitement from every angle. Harvey isn't much like that.
She's really glad that she can count on her parents to bring Christmas joy. However, since James was born, Harvey has been more like that. He was the one who couldn't wait for Christmas. He was the one who wanted to go shopping for the gifts. He even wanted to decorate the apartment with so many decorations that they could see it from the sky.
His excitement has been contagious for her though. Even when she's felt tired and like she isn't getting enough sleep Harvey seems to rub off on her. She doesn't know how he could possibly be feeling so rested after being woken up countless times throughout the night. She supposes that she could just be sleeping lighter for fear that she will sleep through James waking up and the possibility of no one hearing him. She likes to think of it as mother's intuition but she's probably just going crazy.
There's a comfort that she gets from being in her parents' home. Despite the fact that everyone is circling the new baby (and inadvertently Harvey since he won't put the 3 week down nor will he let anyone else hold him), they've all still managed to be a bit snobby towards her. If it's for the same reason her mother is upset with her then no one has yet said anything. She'd really appreciate them all saying a little something to get it out of their system because she's beginning to feel isolated and wondering why she even came at all.
Brandon, her only brother and her oldest sibling, stands tall at 6'3". He's a basketball coach at a high school in New Jersey, and Donna utilizes every opportunity to make fun of him for moving to New Jersey even if it was for a job. He laughs politely because he's a gentleman, but he's lost his youth. He no longer knows how to joke around with his little sisters. She didn't get it when she was younger because he is only 4 years older, but she gets it now that she's an adult. She really can't stand the way acts like he's better than everyone when he really isn't, but his wife encourages the behavior. From her outsiders view, they've been on the rocks for the last three years. Rebecca, his wife of twenty-seven years, has had a drink in her hand almost the whole time. They have both lost their filters and don't seem to be bothering to keep their bickering to a minimum. Donna thinks their five kids must have a hell of a time being around the two of them.
Donna's older sister Cindy is loud as ever. Her husband Michael is the same way, but at least they are pleasant to be around. Their two kids, Bryce and Bianca, are nice and pretty well behaved but Donna hasn't spent much time with them. Cindy really likes to give Donna a hard time, but Donna can hold her own. As the only redhead with the rest of the family being blonde, her sister often made fun of her like older sister do. But Donna was annoying for the sake of being annoying. She was an excellent little sister.
Donna is closest to Amy, her little sister, but Amy's 6 year old son has no respect for anybody. Donna knows that Harvey won't put up with that. It doesn't help that Amy brings men in and out of Zachary's life. She doesn't even know this new guy's name. Is it Scott? Steve? She doesn't fucking know. What she does know is that Harvey has been patient with James, but James is a newborn. Any kind of behavior that Zachary displays and Harvey doesn't agree with could set him off. Last year, Harvey's reaction almost had Donna believing that it would be a better idea not to go through this with him. Not that she could blame Harvey though. Amy really doesn't enforce any rules on him.
Donna can't wait because by the time their Christmas Eve traditions even start her mother's siblings will be here with their kids. How do they even fit fifty people in one house? This house isn't really that big. Not even all of the presents she and Harvey bought could fit in or near the tree in the family room. She doesn't even understand how they all managed to have separate bedrooms growing up. Her parents must have done some pretty shady things to keep them all happy as children.
It's her father's fault probably, for being the only child of an only child and inheriting family money. They have a six bedroom house with two living rooms and a pretty awesome basement (not to mention, the largest dining room she's ever seen in built into a home). It's always decorated appropriately and her father does it all on his own. She wonders how the two of them can even stand to live in this huge house alone.
Fleetingly, Donna silently wishes James good luck this Christmas, Buddy because she's afraid of all the crazy her family has to offer.
"Mommy's family is crazy," Harvey tells James as he lays the baby down on the bed, "they're loud and they all talk at the same time, but we love Mommy anyway, don't we?"
The baby coos and Harvey doesn't even consider that he's basically just talking to himself. "One day I'm going to ask Mommy to marry me and your only job is to get her to say yes."
"How much effort do you think that will take?" Donna's voice nearly makes him jump out of his skin.
"Jesus Christ," he breathes.
"Donna, actually," she corrects playfully.
"It's rude to listen in on other people's conversations," Harvey points out.
"Oh, I wasn't listening. I was just walking down the hallway and I overheard you," she replies as she stretches out on the bed beside the baby, "if you don't want what you're saying to be heard, maybe you should talk a bit quieter."
He stares at her for a moment, challenging her as an eyebrow slowly raises on his forehead – "when has that ever stopped you from listening in on my conversations?"
"Oh yeah," she says slowly, "I do do that."
"Oh yeah," he mocks. He kneels on the floor in front of James and leans on his arms. Donna's hand comes up onto the baby's stomach. Harvey wonders if both of them being present is making James fall back to sleep. "I told you that we should have called them."
"Why are you so worried about it? They still like you. I'm on their shit list," Donna points out.
He smirks, "don't curse in front of the baby."
"Oh please," she says with a laugh. Silence grows between them for a few moments and he just takes a moment to listen to her breathe. She rolls onto her back and stares at the ceiling. Harvey feels badly about giving her a hard time, but she's always in good spirits. Even right after pushing out a baby she was ready to go toe-to-toe with him. She turns her head to look at him; "they're going to flip when we tell them."
"Maybe, maybe not," he disagrees with a shrug. "Or are you just afraid of the big I told you so?"
"Afraid? I got nothin' to be afraid of, baby," she jests.
"You're ready to go home," he nearly shrieks, "I can see it on your face every time someone comes up and goes 'You look great, for just having a baby' with disdain. You hate everything about what's happening here."
"I do not," she disagrees, "I just want his first Christmas to be perfect."
"It'll be perfect," Harvey replies softly. He pushes himself to his feet and stretches out onto the bed beside her. He presses his fingers against her arm that's above her head and slides his hand up to her own. "And if it isn't, we just won't tell him about it."
She laughs a little. It's quiet, but the movement in her chest rattles against his. He can feel the transfer of movement through their bodies and that makes him smile, too. She looks up at him with her big brown eyes and he almost forgets what it was like before they were ever together. He lightly presses his lips against hers. It's brief and barely enough to tie him over until they can actually tell her family.
His hand slides down the length of her and comes to rest at her hip (she takes in a sharp breath and he almost thinks that her eyes glaze over for a brief moment, but he attributes that to his own desires). His thumb slips just beneath the hem of her sweater and brushes over the skin at her waistline. She thinks that he really needs to stop.
Donna gets distracted by the way that James is sleeping, fists balled and lips pouting just a bit. She had hoped that their son would sleep like Harvey because at least he looks graceful, but James doesn't. The baby sleeps like her, always right on the verge of taking up the whole bed. She wonders how Harvey even manages to put up with her at night.
"So, when I was listening in to you talking to the baby-"
"I thought you weren't listening in," he interjects.
She shrugs, "old habits die hard."
He gives her a pass. "We'll work on it then."
"Anyway," she says, giving him a look indicating that she will probably never stop listening in on his private conversations, "you might have mentioned marriage."
"Maybe, maybe not," he admits. He shrugs like he doesn't want to make it a thing. She knows based on his demeanor that he's been thinking about it. "It was just a thought."
"Why are you being so ambiguous about this subject?" She accuses.
He sighs. "I haven't exactly been the most forthcoming with my personal feelings over the years, Donna. It isn't like I'm trying to shy away from this conversation. It's just that I don't want to make promises that I can't keep. You know me better than anyone, and you know that I don't go for anything that I'm not absolutely certain of."
"Bullshit, Harvey," she mutters through gritted teeth.
She begins to pull away from him, but he can't let her. His fingers wrap around her wrist on instinct and she pauses just inches away from crawling off of the bed. "Wait; please don't get mad at me over this. I'm not going anywhere. You already have me, okay? I'm not going anywhere."
"You don't have to be with me just because we have a baby together, Harvey. Us being together was never part of the conditions," she points out.
He smiles softly, reassuringly, "I'm not. I'm with you because I love you – because I want to be."
She doesn't say anything. He's pretty sure that she's about to cry. He isn't sure that he can handle seeing her cry right now – not because of something that he said or did. She's been so much more sensitive these past few months, more vulnerable. Maybe that's what made him feel like he could open up to her and express the feelings that he had kept buried. Her exposing herself made him feel okay with exposing himself.
His palm finds her cheek and his thumb sweeps over her cheekbone just in case she's already crying. "I don't love you because of James. I loved you long before that and we both know it. I just felt like I could expose that part of me to you because you exposed yourself to me. I mean, we have to admit that we were very good at convincing ourselves that we didn't have feelings for each other."
"You're not supposed to make me cry," she mutters as a tear slips down her cheek.
"I was trying to keep you from crying," he replies. She chokes on a laugh which prompts him to laugh a little, too. He doesn't know how to deal with all of her emotions. She was once predictable enough that he could read her like an open book, but since the pregnancy he's always blindsided. The wetness of her cheek sticks to his fingertips and he feels bad. "You know I've never been very good at seeing you cry."
"I know," she acknowledges, "I just still have those hormone things."
"Those things," he teases. "They don't seem like they're ever going away."
He offers her a small smile before closing the space between them and pressing his lips against her left cheek, then her right. Her eyelids flutter closed and she feels every ounce of reassurance that he's trying to send her. He's up to something though. He's always up to something. His lips find hers in a kiss and she sighs against his mouth.
"Oh my god!" Donna's five year old niece Bianca screams from the doorway.
Donna sharply looks behind her before the little redheaded girl can take off down the hallway in a run. Harvey laughs and slides his hands around Donna's waist. She smacks him in the chest really hard right before Bianca screamsthey were kissing! from halfway down the staircase.
"Well, I guess that solves that problem," Harvey comments. Donna rolls her eyes so hard that it hurts Harvey's skull.
Donna bounces her son up and down in her arms as he releases a shrill mixture of screaming and crying that has been bouncing off of the walls for nearly ten minutes straight. Harvey had reluctantly excused himself when Evelyn came storming in about four minutes ago and Donna has been having a staring match ever since. She's sure that the movement is a bit more aggressive than soothing, which she feels awful about.
"Do you want to go first or should I?" Donna finally barks. She can't take the staring and the crying at the same time. It's driving her insane.
"First you don't tell us that you even had the baby, now this?" Evelyn counters with equal force.
Donna laughs bitterly. "I didn't call, be mad at me about that, but don't be mad at me about this."
"About this," her mother mocks excessively, "THIS is not the whole issue. The issue here, Donna, is that you decided to move to the city and keep secrets from this family. You had a baby and didn't bother to tell me. You have a boyfriend and kept that from us. You said this baby plan would work because you two weren't romantically involved."
"We weren't, okay? We had sex a total of four times before I was pregnant and that was to have a baby in the first place." She's afraid that she's shouting, that this argument is a becoming everybody's business and not just theirs. The struggle of trying to have a conversation in the presence of a screaming newborn. "I wasn't keeping things from you. It isn't that simple."
"It never is with you," her mother comments snidely.
"I don't understand why you're so mad," Donna sighs angrily, attempting to rearrange James in hopes that it will help his discomfort, "it's Harvey. You like Harvey."
Evelyn glares. "Yeah, well, I don't like you very much right now."
"We both know that if I had told you that I was going into labor a month early that you would have freaked out. You would have made Dad drive you into the city at the speed of a mad man and you would have tried to control the entire situation undeniably driving me and Harvey both so insane that we probably would never get the hang of the parenting thing, not to mention any routine that we would have tried to get for the three of us would have been shot," Donna rambles. "Harvey and I have enough trouble conceding control to one another without any more control freaks in the room."
"You have always been my most difficult child," her mother mumbles, "you're brilliant but you refuse to concede to anybody."
"Now that's just not true," Donna disagrees. James still screams and she's just moments away from yelling at Harvey to get him to control the situation. She doesn't throw her hands up in the air often and she's great at multitasking, but these aren't just two small fires to put out – these are two forest fires set ablaze and moving at the speed of sound. "Look, after I got pregnant things were…strained and complicated between us. We weren't trying to turn it into anything romantic. I just, I moved in with him so that he wouldn't miss all of the pregnancy things and so that he could help me if I needed it. He told me how he felt about me one night, okay? He came home a little drunk and upset because none of this had happened the way that he wanted it to. That's when he told me. He told me that he had always pictured it being different when we had a kid."
"And just like that?" Evelyn sits on the bed like she's preparing herself a tornado.
Donna smiles softly and runs her hand over James' face. She lightly shakes her head; "not even. I slapped him so hard that it almost left a bruise. I told him that I hated him for putting me in this position, for allowing it to get this far when he knew he had feelings for me. I threatened to leave him – to leave work, to leave the city – and to come home to be with you and Dad. He just wouldn't let me. He fought like hell to get me to stay. I was just scared, Mom. I was scared because I knew it made everything even more complicated but everything else was a blur after that. I'm with him because I love him. Because he loves me. We're going to make this work."
"That's what your sister said," Evelyn mumbles, "yet we had to prepare another place at the table to fit in her new boyfriend of three months."
"I'm not my sister and this isn't some guy I've known for ninety days," Donna reminds her mother, "this is my boss, my best friend, the one person I couldn't imagine not being in my life other than you guys. This is Harvey and this is us. We didn't go into this on a whim, Mom. We went into this knowing everything that was at risk and everything that was to gain. We didn't make this decision lightly."
"I love you, Sweetheart, but you really make me mad sometimes," Evelyn says.
A smile tugs at the corners of Evelyn's mouth and it makes the tension in Donna's shoulders release a little. Now if she could just put out this other fire screaming in her arms. "The feeling is mutual."
"Good," Evelyn says. A full blown smile spreads across her features. Donna shakes her head and rolls her eyes. She knows exactly where she gets her attitude from. "Now, give him to me. Let Grandma handle this."
Donna sighs in relief, "I thought you'd never ask."
She passes her 3 week old child over to her mother and silently prays that the woman has a bit more magic in her after all these years. James is only her ninth grandchild, she's pretty well versed in the grandmother role. Donna is really glad that giving her grandchildren wasn't a burden placed on her. She watches her mother soothe James. He's still crying, but he isn't piercing her eardrums anymore.
"Come here," Evelyn says suddenly, "I'll teach you my secret."
Donna descends the stairs to a living room full of people. Her toe catches on one of the steps as she comes to a stop and settles on her heel at the step just below it. Her hand clenches the wooden rail kind of tightly as she takes in the group of people in front of her. A few of her nieces and nephews are in the living room, some still haven't arrived because they haven't left their dorm yet, but the younger ones have disappeared downstairs in the basement where they're all camping out. She forgot how full the house would be and she feels guilty for bringing a screaming baby into it rather than finding a hotel.
Donna can already tell that this is going to be a fun four days. Everyone is in the living room except for Harvey. He bailed on her. He brought her and their 3 week old son to her parents' and left them there. She can't believe that he didn't take them with him.
"Where's my," Donna starts but hesitates because she can't decide what word best describes Harvey. She can't think what the most casual way to refer to him is. Her boss? Her friend? Her boyfriend? Her baby daddy? They really need to figure that out. She swallows the thick film of saliva that has gathered in the base of her throat and clutches the baby monitor tighter. "Where's Harvey?"
Cindy grins and eyes her little sister cheekily. "He's in the kitchen."
"By himself?" Donna says slowly.
"Yeah," Amy supplies, "but don't go in there. He already yelled at all of us."
Donna laughs. "He wouldn't yell at me."
"Suit yourself," Michael says like a challenge.
Donna could never back down from a challenge. She smirks and heads towards the kitchen, already prepared for him to tell her to go away but knowing that she's going to ignore him. The door swings closed behind her and alerts him of someone's approach. He's standing over the stove and it makes her wonder what the hell he could be up to.
She slides her hands around his waist, "what are you doing that you've decided no one else is allowed in here?"
"I'm cooking dinner," he says with a small shrug.
An eyebrow lifts on her forehead, "for twenty-two people? Do you even know how much work that is?"
"It's nothing. The bigger question here is: how did the talk go?"
She sighs as he takes the baby monitor out of her hand and sets it on the counter. He turns around to face her, stepping more towards her and away from the stove. Her back hits the island. She almost allows herself to get lost in the distraction of his hips pressed against hers. He almost asks again because he knows what she's thinking.
"It was okay, I guess. We came to an understanding," she explains.
He smirks just a little. "And what was that?"
Donna smirks. "I'm not quite sure."
"You never listen," he comments. She shakes her head and rolls her eyes at him while squeezing his sides. He lifts a hand and brushes the hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. "Is she going to forgive you?"
"She showed me her baby calming secret," she replies with a grin, "I'll show you later."
"You'll show me on me or on the baby?" He asks suggestively.
She looks at him pointedly and lightly shakes her head. "Are you feeling neglected?"
"You're distracting me from cooking dinner," he replies. She laughs a little at his efforts to avoid the subject matter which only solidifies in her mind that he is. She feels a little guilty about that, that the baby has made her unable to give him the attention that he needs. But he is very high maintenance when it comes to her. "I told everyone else to leave. You shouldn't be in here. That's setting a bad example."
"Need I remind you that I just gave birth to your child three weeks ago?"
"Trust me, Babe, I haven't forgotten," he counters, "but you can't keep using that to get your way. It isn't fair. I can't ever do anything that big for you."
She gets it. She gets that he's putting in the effort to keep her balanced, to keep her from being too aggressive with everyone. She really wasn't prepared for all the aggression that would come with having a baby or any other feelings that would stir inside of her. She had physically prepared but she couldn't have prepared her feelings for this. She feels so incredibly guilty that she's been on the warpath. She hopes she hasn't been like this for 3 whole weeks.
Harvey's hands press into the counter behind her and she finds herself caught between them. She isn't going to complain about it, not when the father of her child is so damn good-looking. Besides, she needs to show or tell him somehow that she appreciates everything he's done for her.
"You did though," she says, "you gave me a baby when you didn't have to. You stayed when anyone else would have run away."
"I would do anything you asked me to," he replies. She's going to cry again.
"Not anything," she corrects.
He hooks a finger beneath her chin and lifts it, directing her gaze to hers. "Anything you asked me to. I can't lose you."
"Harvey," she replies, her voice shaking, "you're going to make me cry again."
He laughs in the bellows of his throat. "That seems to be easy to do these days."
"Don't be callous," she practically whines.
"I love you, but you can't be in here anymore."
Her hands find his biceps and she squeezes, his muscles flexing beneath her fingertips. The waiting after the baby isn't just difficult for him, but she hasn't admitted that just yet. They're still kind of new at being in a relationship and the physical aspect of a relationship is the only part they haven't spent years exhausting. She already knows everything about him.
"Fine, I'll leave," she sulks, "but don't think you've seen the last of me."
His mouth touches her temple for just a moment before he leans forward a little more. His chest presses against hers and forces her to arch her back as he leans down. He kisses her cheek, jaw, then her mouth. His lips are warm against hers, soft and comforting. Her fingers tighten into his muscles, the black sweater wrapped around him soft against her palm.
"You're distracting me," he says softly against her mouth.
She absently licks her lips as she grins, her tongue inadvertently touching his lips. She slips at of his grasp even though he's reluctant to let her leave. She tosses him a glance over his shoulder.
"You're feeding me to the wild animals, I hope you know."
"You'll survive," he counters. He looks like he's been teased into exhaustion. Surely she doesn't kiss that good.
"Love you, too," she calls. He stands a little taller at this regardless of the fact that her words were lined with sarcasm.
"Oh, Harvey, this food is so good," Rebecca slurs from her seat at the other side of the table.
Harvey doesn't immediately acknowledge her. He just furrows his eyebrows and glances at Donna. They happen to look at each other at the same time. Their eyes lock and he thinks that their silent conversation could probably be weird to everyone else at the table.
Donna's hand finds his right leg beneath the table and she squeezes his thigh. He lightly shakes his head and leans back in his seat. "It's just chili. It isn't really all that difficult."
"It may have been better than mine," Frank, Donna's father, chimes in.
"Don't tell him that," Donna nearly pleads.
Harvey stares at her dumbfounded for a moment before he reaches for her hand. Cindy smirks knowingly and laughs. "Come on, Sis. Give the man some credit."
"Believe me, he gets the credit when the credit is due," Donna retorts, "besides, nobody's chili is better than Daddy's."
Harvey almost laughs.
"Oh god," Brandon adds, "Dad's chili is so spicy. My ass burns for a week after eating it." Evelyn looks at her oldest pointedly. Brandon smirks back at his mother. "Here's to hoping that not everyone needs the bathroom at the same time tonight."
"I don't need to hear about your bathroom habits," Donna grimaces.
Amy gags for effect. "You're grossing me out."
"You're gross," Brandon retaliates with a grin. It's playful bantering that Harvey remembers being part of when he was a kid, up until the ripe age of 16 anyway. That's when everything in his life changed.
Rebecca outwardly groans. "Ugh, why don't you two get a room already?"
Everyone at the table stills almost immediately and directs their gaze at Brandon's wayward wife. Harvey gulps like he's the one in trouble. Donna squeezes his hand like she saw this kind of thing coming from a mile away. She barely mentions her brother's beloved anyway and now he understands why.
"Rebecca," Brandon says, fuming, "can I speak to you outside, please?"
"It's ten degrees," she whines, "I'm not going out there with it so cold."
"In the other room then," Brandon corrects. It isn't a question and he's leaving no room for discussion.
All eyes follow Rebecca as she leaves the room. She nearly stomps up the stairs like a pissed off thirteen year old. Brandon follows with almost the same force. The two of them sound like a heard of animals going up the stairs in seek of refuge during a storm.
"So, Daddy," Cindy starts, "how's business?"
"Business is business," Frank replies. "No one wants to discuss law at the dinner table."
Harvey freezes for a moment. He didn't know that Donna's dad was a lawyer. That…explains a lot actually. She must have felt his muscles tense because she's sliding her thumb over his knuckle like it will fix everything.
Harvey shrugs. "That's my favorite subject." He feels Donna's nails suddenly dig into his skin. He corrects himself on her command, "second favorite subject."
He still didn't correct himself with the right answer. He can tell by the way her jaw muscles tense and she looks like she's about to slap him. He really can get himself into trouble faster than anyone he knows. With the exception of Rebecca, it seems. He should probably tread lightly for the remainder of the evening.
To his relief, the baby starts screaming and blasts through the baby monitor. If it was Brandon and Rebecca who woke him up, he should probably thank them later. Donna removes her napkin from her lap to attend to James, but Harvey stops her before she can move any further. His eyes are pleading with her and she almost decides not to give him an out.
"I've got him. You stay," he says before she can say anything. Great, she thinks, now it looks like he's being considerate and she'd be the asshole if she didn't allow him the opportunity to be. She narrows her eyes at him before he can even finish his thought. He can feel the daggers her eyes are shooting at him in his skin. He releases her hand – "relax."
She lightly shakes her head at him as a look of defeat spreads over her face. She hands him the baby monitor with disdain. His fingers lightly touch her shoulder in an attempt to reassure her.
"Daddy-" Amy starts as Harvey stands from the table. He grimaces. "-Cindy told me that you and Mom were thinking about going on a cruise."
Donna's eyes follow Harvey as he leaves the room. He can't tell if she's still glaring at him or silently pleading with her to save him. He winks at her as he tosses her a glance before he rounds the stair rail to go up the stairs. He hears yelling from the right and a screaming baby from the left. He has this desire to run straight out of the front door the moment Rebecca's voice raises. This reminds him too much of when his mom left.
"Hey, Buddy," Harvey says, pulling the door shut tight behind him, "it's okay. I'm here now."
James keeps crying, even as Harvey lifts him into his arms. He tries to shush him, to soothe him as he sits on the bed and rocks him. He goes down the checklist of things that can be wrong before it hits him.
"I guess this is a Mommy problem," Harvey mutters.
"Show me how to do that thing again," Harvey says with a grin.
Donna looks at him emphatically before she grabs her sweater by the hem to tug it off over her head. He stares at her, lips parted as though he's never seen her topless before, and shakes his head. Why would she keep doing this to him? He swallows, hard, and kicks his shoes off.
"The kid is already asleep," she reminds him. She tosses her white cashmere sweater onto the bed and returns his gaze. He can't stand the way she's presenting herself to him like she isn't attractive at all. She's flaunting it, knowing that he can look but can't really touch. "You're staring."
He smirks. "Your body is bangin'." She's already so done with him. He's trying to mutually drive her up the wall like this isn't hard on her, too. "So is your face."
"Okay, no more movies for you," she murmurs through a small laugh.
"Made you laugh though," he points out. She unbuttons her jeans and grabs a cozy spot on the mattress within arm's length of her. He's tired of the no touching rule. It's the dumbest rule he's ever experienced in his entire life. "But you seriously are hot."
"How can you say that? I'm fat," she corrects.
"Donna," he replies. He almost rolls his eyes at how ridiculous of an idea that even is. He shakes his head in protest and reaches for her, his fingers circling her wrist. He pulls her between his legs and touches her stomach, thumbs brushing at her waistline. "Don't be like that. I've been telling you that I'm attracted to you for the last three weeks. Come on, you know you're hot."
"I just had a baby, Harvey."
"Exactly," he replies, "you just had a baby and you're still the most attractive person in the room. What can I do to make you believe me?"
She lifts her hands and settles them onto shoulders, draping her arms around his neck. "I don't even know where we stand, Harvey."
"How can you not know? We live together. We have a baby together. I'm at your family's house for Christmas. I don't know what else I can give so you can figure out where we stand." He presses his lips against her stomach just above her belly button. She shivers beneath the warmth of his mouth.
She sighs and he lifts his gaze to hers; "but what do I call you? Are you my boyfriend? Are you just the father of my child? Are you roommate? I need to know how to define us."
"How about fiancé? You can call me that," he replies with a shrug.
Her eyebrows furrow in confusion. "But we're not-"
"But I'm asking," he interjects. His fingers press into her ribcage and slide up her arms until he can clasp both of her hands in his.
"I thought you didn't want to get married," she reminds him.
"I wanted to surprise you but you're the hardest person to surprise that I've ever met. I thought if I didn't ask now then you'd figure it out and ruin the surprise," he explains. He smiles a bit sheepishly, fingers sliding through hers. "You didn't see this coming at all, did you?"
"I don't know what to say," she admits.
"You can think about it."
Her fingers squeeze his shoulders and she leans forward to press a kiss to his jaw. He doesn't know how to take that. Is that her way of answering his question, or is she telling him that she'll think about it? He can't tell, and for once he doesn't know how to read her. It doesn't help that she is speechless.
"Honey, I love you," she practically whispers in his ear, "but isn't this something you want to talk about?"
"Babe, you were crying earlier when you thought I didn't want to marry you," he kindly recaps for her, "but I did and I do. I want to marry you. I want us to be a family, but if you need to think about it-"
"I don't. I don't need to think about it," she shakes her head, "I do want to marry you. You're my hero for being here with me, in this crazy house, full of so many people that I don't even understand how we all fit. But, you've been driving me crazy with the way that your jeans have settled on your hips."
"Get some self-control, Woman," he retorts, "you don't have to wait much longer."
"I really can't wait to have sex with you again," she expresses.
He laughs quietly, dragging his fingers across her skin. "It's the ass."
She cackles, "it's the cute ass."
"I'm tired," he says, "can we go to bed?"
His fingers slide down her ribcage and his hands settle on her hips. "Can I get one more look at it before we go?"
"Consider it your new Christmas present," he jokes. Her fingers slip beneath the hem of his sweater and she claws at his skin with her nails. The light scratches prompts him to intake a sharp breath and narrow his gaze at her. "We have approximately three hours of sleep before her new alarm goes off. Stop teasing me."
"You're the boss," she replies with a wink.
He lightly shakes his head, deciding that it's better to make no comment at all. He takes his sweater off over his head and hands it to her, already knowing that she's going to pick it up and put it on to sleep in. He keeps his white t-shirt on and crawls into bed, hogging the middle and leaving her no choice but to be extremely close to him. He always does this to her.