Sigh
"Come ON, Ted!" Barney shouted at him across the table. You've got to choose!"
"Yeah!" Marshall agreed, a little sullenly.
"I cannot believe," Ted laughed, "that you guys are actually asking me to decide which of you I'd rather have sex with!"
At least the both of them had the good sense to look embarrassed.
"Hypothetically," Marshall elaborated, hurriedly.
"Okay," Ted said with a sigh. "I choose Barney."
"WHAT?" Marshall spluttered.
"Yes!!" Barney jumped up and down in his seat. "In your face, loser!"
"But… no!" Marshall looked on the verge of tears. "Why, Ted? After twelve years of best-friendship? Just tell me why! You owe me that much…"
Ted chuckled. "Well, since Barney's obviously done it with a guy before, I figured that at least he'd know what he was doing, you know?"
Marshall swallowed, while Barney continued to look smug until he realised what Ted had said.
"Say what?" Barney protested.
"And dude, I've seen your penis. It's monstrous…" Ted continued.
"I- I- I- " Barney stuttered, his eye twitching.
"Oh give it up, dude," Marshall snapped at him. "I'd be disappointed if you hadn't gone gay at least three times."
Barney opened his mouth to protest but Ted put his hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, man. You can tell us."
Barney swallowed. "Well, there was that time when…"
"HAH!" Ted said, laughing and beckoning to Marshall, who reluctantly handed over a large wad of bills.
"That was a bet?" Barney said, looking between the both of them in disbelief. "You bet whether I'd ever had sex with another dude?"
Ted nodded and Marshall said, "Hey, it's nothing to be embarrassed about dude."
"I'm not!" Barney said with a snort. "I was awesome, obviously. But…"
"But what?" Marshall said looking at Ted.
Ted turned away, his cheeks coloring.
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me…" Marshall laughed. "Ted?"
Ted mumbled. "We were drunk."
Barney laughed "Yeah we were!"
Ted mumbled something else, far too low for Marshall to hear.
"What did he say?" Marshall asked.
Barney winked and grinned. "He said, the first three times…"