Sitting in her ship outside of the Rave Club Euphoria, Leanna thought, she thought and she thought. Angry thoughts, hurt thoughts, regretful thoughts, loving thoughts, thoughts about her matesprite and how he had done the worst thing possible. He had pailed the Renegade, the troll who claimed to be her ancestor. He should've known that she hated her with a passion, not black hate, but murder hate. Despite the fact that the Renegade had found her as a grub and raised her as her own, as well as many of her friends, the Renegade had raised her first moirail as well, Talian Canian. The vindictive bitch had known that pailing her Hoomun would hurt her beyond all belief, she had pailed him to hurt her. She just knew it. She sat in the corner of the cabin of the ship, all the lights were off, and she had changed her eyes to the rust-red ones that were natural to her, so that when she next saw him it would be easier as he would appear blurry. She wore an all-black outfit: slim black pants, a long sleeved black shirt that cut off just below her breasts and black combat boots. She had not put on the usual makeup to hide her numerous scars upon her body.
She sat there for a time, crying bloody tears; they left tracts behind, drying upon her face as if they were scabs. Her legs were pulled up to her chest, her arms around her knees, crying into them. At times she was screaming in rage, "HOOMUN! WHY?! WHY DID YOU DO THISS TO MEEE?!" She was furious, she was heartbroken, and she didn't know which was worse. Finally after a time, she let go of her knees, she wiped her cheeks off with the back of her hands, the worst of the "scabbing" falling off. She slowly stood up, sniffling and shaking. Leanna took a shaky step towards the hatch of the ship, she was going to confront him, she was going to give her a piece of her mind. "Sstupid… no good… lying… cheeeating Hoomun…" she grumbled under her breath. "Heee'ss gonna geeet it, heee reeeally iss." She felt so wronged, so hurt, so broken, she had thought that this matespritship would last; she thought that this one would work, she thought that this was the one that she would spend her last few sweeps with. Another shaky step towards the hatch and she crumpled to the ground, sobbing. She needed to get herself together if she was going to do this.
She screamed and wailed into her arms for a few minutes, before sitting up slowly. Standing up unsteadily she took a deep breath and brushed herself off, she would do this and she would do this now. Leanna walked over to the weapons chest that she kept by the captain's seat and opened it up. Inside were many daggers and knives, as well as any other thing that could be dangerous when flung at someone, such as her many syringes full of different chemicals. She grabbed quite a few daggers and knives, as well as a few syringes full of paralyzing agents. She stuffed these into her strife deck, Hoomun was going to pay and he was going to pay dearly for breaking her heart. She strode over to the hatch of the ship, gripping the inside handle weakly, turning it painfully slowly and pushing it open. She hopped down, neglecting to use the stairs that appeared at the open hatch. Leanna stormed over to the hub that housed the elevator down to the Rave Club, she knew he would be there. Hesitating before the doors she thought, maybe she shouldn't just storm in and confront him in front of everyone, but then she knew this was the only way she should do it.
With a press of a button, her decision was made, the doors opened and she stepped inside the elevator. On the way down she thought, she thought about what to say and how to say it. Should she tiptoe around the subject before announcing that she knew, or should she outright yell at him and say that she knew. Should she question him about what he did while she was gone on her mission, her mission that she nearly died on, did he miss her while she was away, like she had missed him, had he worried about her while she was away, the way that she always worried about him. All too soon the doors to the elevator opened and she stepped into the lounge of the Club. She walked into the lounge, frowning and with clenched fists, one step in and Lupi pounced upon her. Emitting an undignified screech she fell beneath the other troll.
"You all right?" Lupi asked her when Leanna had hissed at her. She was met merely with "Pisssseeed off.". Lupi seemed to immediately realize why Leanna was so upset when she asked, "Ryan?"
"Heee ssaid heee was ssorry and that heee did it beeecausseee heee was drunk and had a long day." Leanna drooped as she said this.
"That i5 a liEe. HEe wa5 a5 5obEer a5 I am." Lupi retorted. Leanna looked shocked and hurt as she exclaimed, "What!" Lupi nodded to confirm that what she had said was indeed as it had been.
She hissed between her teeth, "Heee'ss deeead." By now Blaire had noticed that the scene was before her was not going very well with a murmur of "This is goin bad…"
"I told him not to, and hEe 5aid hEe wa5n't thEen hEe did anyway5." Lupi told Leanna as Ryan, the male in question, walked down the stairs, looking about the room. Blaire noticed this and tried to motion him to go back up before he was seen. He didn't seem to understand and looked confused. Leanna screed angrily.
"Huh?" Ryan murmured. He heard the scree and looked more confused. "Leanna?"
"HEe EevEen called hEer LaEetu5." Lupi continued on despite Leanna's obvious fury. Leanna was glaring at Ryan by now, she was shooting daggers with her dull eyes now bright with rage. "YOU!" She screamed at him.
Despite the look aimed at him, Ryan seemed unphased. "Hm?" He muttered as his companion called to him. Blaire could tell by now that no good would come of this, breathing out " Shit..." Leanna stood up, clenching her fists and snarling at Ryan. " L-Leanna n0w darlin dㆁnt kill any0ne." Blaire called out to her. She sat back, gripping her tablet worriedly, her eyes fglowing a dark green.
"Heee fuckeeed that bitch!" Leanna screamed as Foxias ran over to Ryan, looking confused. "Master?" he asked. No reply, until "Hello Foxias." Lupi was merely watching at this point. By now Leanna appeared very furious yet also ready to cry. Blaire's eyes dated between Lupi, Leanna and finally Ryan.
"Foxias, I have some bad news for the both of us." Ryan said to his companion. Blaire called Lupi over to her. Foxias asked about the news as Ryan sighed, putting a hand on his shoulder. Out of nowhere Leanna flung a dagger at Ryan, aiming for right between his eyes, Foxias caught it, not once looking away from Ryan as he did so and threw the dagger to the ground. "Who threw the dagger, Fox?" Ryan asked.
Blaire gulped nervously from her pile of candy, "H-how do you think er…this shall end…" she asked Lupi who shrugged and asked her why she asked. Foxias had admitted that he did not know who had thrown the dagger because he hadn't looked. Leanna hissed angrily, flinging more daggers with intense speed and rapidity. One of these daggers hit him in the forehead, a golden light coming out from the wound.
Foxias exclaimed, looking about frantically and calling out, "Who threw that?!" He was met by a scream from Leanna.
"ANYONEEE BUT HEEER AND IT WOULD HAVEEE BEEEEEEN FINEEE!" She still had the daggers in hand. Ryan started to falter, gasping out with shuddering breaths the news he had meant to tell Foxias.
"I was going to tell y-you…Life meters, a-are all s-set…To…" He fell over as he uttered the last word. "Zero.." His eyes shut and his chest fell, not rising once more, his body motionless.
Leanna screamed once more, "NO! I'M NOT DONEEE WITH YOU!" Bloody tears were dripping down her cheeks. Blaire and Lupi had been talking the background, now noticing what was happening. Foxias kneeled down next to Ryan, dark blue tears welling up at the edges of his eyes.
Blaire tried to intervene, " L-Lupi st0p Leanna..." Foxias mourned for Ryan, telling his body that he should have told him, that he would've protected him. Various others in the room watched the scene, talking amongst themselves. Blaire motioned to Ryan's body lying on the floor in response to Lupi's question as to why she should stop Leanna.
Leanna started bawling, falling to her knees. She screamed once more, "I'M NOT DONEEE WITH YOU!" A golden light came up from Ryan's chest, as if to say 'last life taken'. Lupi shrugged, "HEe'5 gonEe."
Foxias mumbled stuff about Ryan being permanently gone and not able to be saved. Leanna had blocked everything out by this point. Daggers still in her hands, she began slamming them into her thighs in a pit of fury and anguish. "NO! I'M NOT DONEEE WITH YOU!" She screamed. Bloody tears were streaming down her cheeks, her rust red eyes seemed hollow now. Her whole being gave off an air of defeat and pain.
Blaire had been watching this all, she nudged Lupi, "S-she's hurtin' herself." She murmured. Lupi yelled at Leanna to stop. She ignored Lupi, she ignored everyone, she just continued to stab herself. Blaire and Lupi ran over to Leanna trying to get her to stop.
As this happened the eyes on Ryan's body bolted open, completely golden, the body stood up, golden wings sprouting from his back and a white halo appearing over his head. He looked at each Foxias and Leanna. Foxias seemed confused. "Foxias, I'm sorry."
Blaire tried to grab Leanna's wrists, telling her to stop. Leanna snarled at her, pulling away from her grip. "LEanna! Do you not rEemEembEer what you told mEe?" Lupi exclaimed. Blaire grabbed her shoulders, begging her to stop hurting herself.
"I DON'T CAREEE! MY LIFEEE ISS RUINEEED NOW! THAT BITCH MADEEE SSUREEE OF IT!" Leanna screamed out. Ryan turned to look at Leanna, walking over to her.
"Leanna…" He uttered softly, Blaire was grabbing at Leanna's wrists again, her eyes flaring up green. "Think of the grub5." Lupi pleaded. Leanna hissed, bloody tears rolling down her cheeks, by now there were dried tracts of blood on her face, and splatters of it upon her body as well as the blood from the stabs she had inflicted upon herself.
Once Ryan reached Leanna, he rested a hand on her head, the daggers turning to gold and busting, her wounds healing as her body gained a slight golden glow. "Leanna, listen to me. I'm sorry for what I did, I thought it was you. All I ever di is mess things up, don't I?" He said to her.
"You'rEe lying." Lupi hissed out. Ryan replied calmly, "I'm not. I have to go in a minute, I'm telling my truths here and now." Lupi snarled, "You fucking called hEer LaEetu5."
"Leanna, I want to let you know, you were the best thing to come into my life. I love you." He hugged her tightly, beginning to cry. Leanna screeched, causing those around her to cover their ears in pain. "Leanna, please, it'll be alright." He tried to comfort her.
"No, it won't!" She cried out, her body wracked with sobs, her voice hoarse from grief. "It will…Trust me, my love, it will…" He told her, "Leanna, look at me." Leanna looked up at him, her eyes shining from the tears. "Really?! How?! When I'm losing everything, how will it be alright?!" She wailed out.
"It will be okay…You were the one to kill me, and I'm fine with it. I never should've did what I did." He tried to sound okay with this, but she could tell that he didn't want to go. "It won't beee!" She whimpered out. "You'll find someone better, someone who wasn't in the position that I was." Ryan told her, he wanted her to believe this just as much as he wanted to believe it himself. "No…I won't…" Ryan's body began to glow gold, he leaned down to kiss her on the forehead and stood up.
"I'm sorry, Leanna." He said before his body started to slowly break away, his whole being focused on her, a single tear came from an eye and as it landed on the ground he disappeared. In the air Leanna could hear in just a whisper, "Goodbye, I love you." Leanna started to sob uncontrollably, her vascular pump broken. She felt as if her whole life was over, it seemed like she had been losing everything lately, everything was spiraling out of control.
"That'5 not…Nonono thi5 i5 not what wa5 5uppo5Eed to happen…" Lupi uttered before falling to her knees crying. Blaire's eyes slowly dimmed, her hands coming down from her ears to reveal blood, she went over to Lupi and hugged her. Ignoring all this, Leanna grabbed a pair of daggers again, starting to slam them into any and every place she can easily get them on her body. Blaire let go of Lupi, wiping the blood off that was running down her jawline.
As she slammed her daggers into her flesh, blood pouring fowarth from the wounds, she ignored the world. Leanna did not notice as Lupi came over to her and mutely grabbed at her hands. Leanna tried to wrench her hands away from to stab herself, but Lupi grabbed at her daggers and pulled her into a hug. Blaire floated over to the two, kneeling down and taking the daggers to keep them away from Leanna.
Leanna still cried and screamed in grief, a grief that she had never before known, she had not known that one could hurt so much, so deeply, so intensely. She slammed her fists into her thighs, screaming in rage. Lupi nudged her with her nose, illiciting Leanna to whisper, "I-it'ss all my" she sobbed, "f-fault!" Lupi nudged her again. "EEE-eeeveeert-thing iss g-going wrong!" Lupi slowly signed to her, "Yuthio hatched" Leanna smiled weakly, going back to sobbing.
Lupi nudged her again and covered her own ears, then uncovering them, shrugging as if to say it didn't make a difference. "What?" Leanna asked. Lupi sighed and pointed to herself and then to Leanna, pointing to her own ears and shaking her head. Suddenly Leanna tried to pull out her eyes, electronics and all. Lupi grabbed at her hands, despite Leanna's struggles she pulled her hands away. "5top. PlEea5Ee."
" I don't deeesseeerveee to sseeeeee anymoreee" She tried tugging at her eyes again, Lupi stopping her from ripping them out. "LEeanna, 5top." Leanna emitted a screech once more, a mournful and grievous screech, not really highpitched but low. Leanna fell limp, crying heavily as Lupi left without warning. Once Leanna realized that Lupi had disappeared, she reached for her face, ripping out her eyes causing blood to pour out from the wound. She soon passed out in a pool of her own blood.
After everyone else in the lounge had either left or fallen asleep, the Renegade entered, she could tell that something was wrong with her 'grub'. She could tell from both her flickering light in the elder's mind's eye and from a tug in her vascular pump. "Leanna! Dawling, whewe awe you?" She cooed, hoping that the younger would reply. Once she stepped foot inside the Club though, she scented Leanna's blood and knew that something had gone terribly wrong. Leanna's light was fading, and fading quickly, she would not last too much longer without help.
"Leanna!" She cried out, rushing to the broken body on the floor, she kneeled in the pool of blood, allowing it to soak into her clothes. She grabbed the young woman's body and held her to her chest, whimpering softly as she felt how cool the body was and how light her breathing was. "Leanna, I'm not done with you yet." She whispered to the unconscious girl, she wasn't going to give up on her little girl, not now, not ever. This was the girl that she had stolen from the brooding caverns, along with ten other grubs (but that doesn't matter now). This was the girl that she had given her lusus to, she had stolen the other ten lusi for her other charges (but that still isn't what matters now). This was the girl that she had trained to grow blind as the sweeps went by, she had taught her how to play the tin whistle; she had instructed her in the practices of echolocation. She was not going to give up on her so easily.
"Leanna, don't you dawe fucking die on me. I will find a way to bwing you back if you twy." She hissed at the bloodied body, pale red tears splashing down to land on the cheeks of the smaller. "Leanna, I won't let you die. You have no idea who you'we meththing with." She whimpered, her lower lip quivering as she saw the light blink out and back on in her mind. She clutched the girl to her chest, running into the elevator and quickly pressing the button to take them to the topside. Once they had reached the topside, she raced to her ship, shouting at it. "Hatch: OPEN! OPEN NOW!" By the time she had reached the hatch to the ship, the hatch had opened and lowered the stairs, she bound up them, rushing into a room that appeared to be a respite block. She lay the girl down on a bed gently, tears still sliding down from her eyes despite her fighting to hold them back. "Bitch, you will not die. You will not die on me today. I will not allow it." She whispered. She pulled out a med kit from her sylladex, ripping it open and grabbing the bandages.
Leanna moaned slightly as she was laid on the bed, a low tortured chirp emitted from deep in her throat, she moved a hand to her face, sticking a single finger into her left eye socket and clawing at it lightly. "Nonna…dom't leeet neee sseeeeee how bad it iss…" She whimpered out. The Renegade, "Nonna", gently petted the girl's cheek, pulling her hand away from her face. She cooed at her gently before tying her wrists to the bed to prevent her from harming herself further. She began to compress the deepest wounds with bandages; the worst of the bleeding had already stopped from time. "Nonna… I'n sorry…I didm't neam to do it…" The girl continued on. She was met with a gentle shushing from the elder and a stroke of her cheek.
"Nonna will make it alwight, my dawling. Nonna alwayth doeth." 'Nonna' cooed to her little girl. She leaned down and kissed her forehead before bandaging around the girl's eye sockets, tears dripping into the wounds as she did so. It always hurt her so much to see her child hurt so, any of her children, she had never stopped grieving for the children that she had lost. She knew that Leanna was broken now, broken worse than she ever had before, worse even than when that horrid Einarr had broken her vascular pump, he had at least had the decency to save her life first. "My dawling gwub, Nonna will alwayth be hewe fow you. Don't you evew fowget that." She cooed into her ear. She began to file down the girl's claws, a deep fear in her vascular pump that if she did not the girl would use them to harm herself. She would have to remind herself to 'watch' the girl closely to prevent her from biting herself.
"NONNA!" Leanna cried out at this, "MO! I MEEEEEED THOSSEEE! What if a big lussuss comeeess at neee agaim?!" She tried to fight against the nail file but was too weak to do so for long. She soon passed out again and the job was done. 'Nonna' fell over her child's broken body, no longer strong enough to hold back her weeping; she knew that in some way she had caused this. There was no other explanation. This child was her pride and joy; she had been the first one that she had found, the one that was most like her. For all she knew, this child was truly her descendant, despite having been hatched only ten sweeps after her own wriggling day. This was why she was so hard on her, she wanted her to be the very best that she could, she wanted her to be better than she had ever been. She wanted this child to know happiness, which was why she had tested her child's matesprite, he had failed the test and this was surely why her child was broken. Her child was broken because her matesprite wasn't ready to be tested, because he had failed and broken her vascular pump.
"Damn human," she hissed out, sobbing into the girl's stomach. "He bwoke hew, he bwoke my little giwl." She pounded a fist on the bed, anger overwhelming her. She needed to find that human and make him pay. She stood up after a time, weeping her tears away. She gathered weapons from the supply closet and set out. She was going to find this human no matter what and make him pay. "Leanna, I will be back thoon, thleep well."