Author's Note: Alright! I know it isn't Christmas, but I just thought of
this great idea, which is a parody of one of my dad's favorite movies. I
have been forced to watch this every year at Christmas (even though we
celebrate Hanukkah) so I know the story line well. Hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: Nothing in here is mine, and you would know me all too well if
I owned it.
Its A Wonderful Life:Harry Potter Style by Sweetened Sugar
Hermione Granger looked at her reflection in the mirror. She looked like a mess. Her mascara was running down her cheeks, and her hair was flopping. The Yule Ball had been a disaster for her. Viktor Krum, the famous Quiddich player, had taken her, but he was not the best dancer. Not that Viktor wasn't kind enough, but she didn't like him in that way. She would have rather spent the night with someone else.
"Stupid Ron. He always ruins everything." She said to her reflection.
He hadn't even asked her to dance once. He had insulted her by claiming she couldn't get a date and was only lying to Neville, and then he had blamed her for trying to make Harry lose the tournament.
"I wish I was never even born!" She yelled.
"That could be arranged." A voice replied.
Hermione nearly jumped in fright. She turned around, and she saw a bald man.
"Excuse me?" She stammered.
"Oh, I forgot, I haven't introduced myself. I'm an angel. You can call me Clarence."
"How did you get here?" She asked.
"I appeared suddenly, which angels tend to do. I would have come quicker if I had my wings, but I don't have them yet. And you, Hermione Granger, are going to help me get them."
"How will I help? How do you know my name? Why are you here?"
"Ask one question at a time! Really! I know your name because I have been watching your entire life." He said.
"How? Why?" She asked.
"To make a long story short, I was sent to you because you wished you were never born. I want to show you what it would be like."
"What, to die? Thanks, but no thanks Clarence. Why don't you go home now?" She asked.
"You wanted it, so you're going to get it. I think a girl as smart as you would know the old saying, 'Be careful what you wish for...', and you did wish it."
"I was being figurative, really. I don't want to be dead." Hermione said, stepping away from him.
"Well that's too bad, because here we go!" He yelled, grabbing her hand and disappearing.
When they landed, they were in a small kitchen that she recognized as her own.
"What are we doing at my house? I only come back during the summer."
"You are going to see how your parents live without you ever being born."
A man came in to sit down at the table, and was soon joined by a woman.
"Eggs again? We had those yesterday. And the day before." The man said.
"The doctor says it might help me have a baby." The woman said.
"Let's face it Laura, we're too old to have children. Nothing is going to help us, and even if we adopted, we'd be the oldest parents ever."
Tears came to the woman's eyes. "I know David, I know. But can it really hurt to try?"
"Laura, how about we go out for breakfast?" Hermione's father asked.
Hermione's mother nodded her head and they walked out the door.
"Why didn't they see us? Why do they need a baby if they have me?" Hermione asked, confused.
"They can't see us because I'm an angel, and you were never born. They feel alone because they never had any children." Clarence said. "Now, moving on..."
They disappeared again, and reappeared at a cemetary.
"Why are we here?" Hermione asked, then looking down, gasped.
Three grave stones stood in a row. James Potter, Lily Potter, Harry Potter.
"Harry isn't dead. I just saw him at the ball tonight." Hermione said.
"He drank the wrong bottle to get near to the Sorcerer's Stone. He never found out that it wasn't Snape who wanted it." Clarence said solemnly.
"He drank the right bottle. I told him which bottle to drink." Hermione protested.
"You didn't tell him anything, because you were never born. Let's go, this place gives me the creeps." Clarence said, grabbing her hand.
They now landed at Hogwarts.
"Good! Thanks for the tour Clarence, but I think that I'll be going back up to my room now."
"Not so fast Hermione. You have never been born, therefore, you don't have a room."
"Are we in the future? I don't remember ever seeing that boy at Hogwarts before." Hermione said, pointing at a boy who looked as if he had been struck by lightning.
"That's Ron Weasley."
"What? No, Ron has that color hair, but that definitely isn't Ron."
"It is Ron."
"No it isn't. I just saw Ron at the ball, and he doesn't look a thing like that. That boy looks so...dead."
"He is almost dead. When Harry was killed, he felt responsible. His sister was killed by Tom Riddle, because Harry wasn't there to save her. Voldemort returned to power and killed his parents."
"No! Harry didn't die! I helped him get to the Sorcerer's Stone! He saved Ginny, and You-Know-Who never returned to power! Ron's parents are still alive and well!" Hermione yelled, enraged.
"No they aren't. You were never born. Harry is dead. Ginny is dead. Ron's parents are dead. Ron neglects his appearance, because he feels he has no reason to live." Clarence stated.
"No! It can't be true!" Hermione cried, sinking to her knees.
"It is."
"What did they do to deserve this?" She said, bursting into tears.
"They did nothing."
"What do you mean?"
"You did it."
"Why would I do something like this to my friends? I may not be a Hufflepuff, but I am loyal."
"You said you were never born. By not being born, you did this to your friends."
"So you mean, this wouldn't happen if I had been born." She said, drying her eyes.
"Yep."
"So all I need to say is that I want to be born?"
"Yes, but you have to mean it."
"I wish I was born! I wish it with all my heart!" Hermione yelled.
Suddenly, the world started spinning. When things calmed down, Hermione and Clarence were back in the bathroom.
"Am I born?"
"Yep."
"If I'm born, then where are your wings?"
"I'll get them later. Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings. Goodbye Hermione."
"Goodbye Clarence." She said, as he disappeared.
Hermione cleaned herself up and walked into her room. Parvati and Lavender were sitting on their beds.
"Hi." Hermione said.
"What were you doing in there? We heard noises." Parvati asked, taking off her earings.
"Parvati, can I see your earings?" Hermione asked, wanting a closer look.
"Sure." She said, handing them over to Hermione.
The earings were shaped like little bells. Hermione shook one, and it rang.
"Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings. Thanks Clarence." She whispered.
Its A Wonderful Life:Harry Potter Style by Sweetened Sugar
Hermione Granger looked at her reflection in the mirror. She looked like a mess. Her mascara was running down her cheeks, and her hair was flopping. The Yule Ball had been a disaster for her. Viktor Krum, the famous Quiddich player, had taken her, but he was not the best dancer. Not that Viktor wasn't kind enough, but she didn't like him in that way. She would have rather spent the night with someone else.
"Stupid Ron. He always ruins everything." She said to her reflection.
He hadn't even asked her to dance once. He had insulted her by claiming she couldn't get a date and was only lying to Neville, and then he had blamed her for trying to make Harry lose the tournament.
"I wish I was never even born!" She yelled.
"That could be arranged." A voice replied.
Hermione nearly jumped in fright. She turned around, and she saw a bald man.
"Excuse me?" She stammered.
"Oh, I forgot, I haven't introduced myself. I'm an angel. You can call me Clarence."
"How did you get here?" She asked.
"I appeared suddenly, which angels tend to do. I would have come quicker if I had my wings, but I don't have them yet. And you, Hermione Granger, are going to help me get them."
"How will I help? How do you know my name? Why are you here?"
"Ask one question at a time! Really! I know your name because I have been watching your entire life." He said.
"How? Why?" She asked.
"To make a long story short, I was sent to you because you wished you were never born. I want to show you what it would be like."
"What, to die? Thanks, but no thanks Clarence. Why don't you go home now?" She asked.
"You wanted it, so you're going to get it. I think a girl as smart as you would know the old saying, 'Be careful what you wish for...', and you did wish it."
"I was being figurative, really. I don't want to be dead." Hermione said, stepping away from him.
"Well that's too bad, because here we go!" He yelled, grabbing her hand and disappearing.
When they landed, they were in a small kitchen that she recognized as her own.
"What are we doing at my house? I only come back during the summer."
"You are going to see how your parents live without you ever being born."
A man came in to sit down at the table, and was soon joined by a woman.
"Eggs again? We had those yesterday. And the day before." The man said.
"The doctor says it might help me have a baby." The woman said.
"Let's face it Laura, we're too old to have children. Nothing is going to help us, and even if we adopted, we'd be the oldest parents ever."
Tears came to the woman's eyes. "I know David, I know. But can it really hurt to try?"
"Laura, how about we go out for breakfast?" Hermione's father asked.
Hermione's mother nodded her head and they walked out the door.
"Why didn't they see us? Why do they need a baby if they have me?" Hermione asked, confused.
"They can't see us because I'm an angel, and you were never born. They feel alone because they never had any children." Clarence said. "Now, moving on..."
They disappeared again, and reappeared at a cemetary.
"Why are we here?" Hermione asked, then looking down, gasped.
Three grave stones stood in a row. James Potter, Lily Potter, Harry Potter.
"Harry isn't dead. I just saw him at the ball tonight." Hermione said.
"He drank the wrong bottle to get near to the Sorcerer's Stone. He never found out that it wasn't Snape who wanted it." Clarence said solemnly.
"He drank the right bottle. I told him which bottle to drink." Hermione protested.
"You didn't tell him anything, because you were never born. Let's go, this place gives me the creeps." Clarence said, grabbing her hand.
They now landed at Hogwarts.
"Good! Thanks for the tour Clarence, but I think that I'll be going back up to my room now."
"Not so fast Hermione. You have never been born, therefore, you don't have a room."
"Are we in the future? I don't remember ever seeing that boy at Hogwarts before." Hermione said, pointing at a boy who looked as if he had been struck by lightning.
"That's Ron Weasley."
"What? No, Ron has that color hair, but that definitely isn't Ron."
"It is Ron."
"No it isn't. I just saw Ron at the ball, and he doesn't look a thing like that. That boy looks so...dead."
"He is almost dead. When Harry was killed, he felt responsible. His sister was killed by Tom Riddle, because Harry wasn't there to save her. Voldemort returned to power and killed his parents."
"No! Harry didn't die! I helped him get to the Sorcerer's Stone! He saved Ginny, and You-Know-Who never returned to power! Ron's parents are still alive and well!" Hermione yelled, enraged.
"No they aren't. You were never born. Harry is dead. Ginny is dead. Ron's parents are dead. Ron neglects his appearance, because he feels he has no reason to live." Clarence stated.
"No! It can't be true!" Hermione cried, sinking to her knees.
"It is."
"What did they do to deserve this?" She said, bursting into tears.
"They did nothing."
"What do you mean?"
"You did it."
"Why would I do something like this to my friends? I may not be a Hufflepuff, but I am loyal."
"You said you were never born. By not being born, you did this to your friends."
"So you mean, this wouldn't happen if I had been born." She said, drying her eyes.
"Yep."
"So all I need to say is that I want to be born?"
"Yes, but you have to mean it."
"I wish I was born! I wish it with all my heart!" Hermione yelled.
Suddenly, the world started spinning. When things calmed down, Hermione and Clarence were back in the bathroom.
"Am I born?"
"Yep."
"If I'm born, then where are your wings?"
"I'll get them later. Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings. Goodbye Hermione."
"Goodbye Clarence." She said, as he disappeared.
Hermione cleaned herself up and walked into her room. Parvati and Lavender were sitting on their beds.
"Hi." Hermione said.
"What were you doing in there? We heard noises." Parvati asked, taking off her earings.
"Parvati, can I see your earings?" Hermione asked, wanting a closer look.
"Sure." She said, handing them over to Hermione.
The earings were shaped like little bells. Hermione shook one, and it rang.
"Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings. Thanks Clarence." She whispered.