Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ, and while I'm on the point I would also like pointing out that I don't own Microsoft, The Moon, Japan, The Prime Meridian, George Bushes first pair of underwear, A thong, Muhammad Ali, or King Tuts chin thingy.
Brenman: This is a fic that I thought up at work one day. Not that you should care about that. It's about Bulma and Chi Chi getting transported into the future by Babas' crystal ball during the fight between Goku and Vegeta. How will the two women react during a run in with the man who just hours before they saw beating up their friends? You will just have to read to find out, or you could hit the back button and go choose a different story. No wait, don't do that. I wasn't being serious. Now if only I could figure out how to disable everyone's back buttons.
Crystal Ball, Screw Us All.
Chapter 1: Is That Crystal Or Dynamite?
Bulma Sat on the floor of Kame House, she was watching the television in horror with tears in her eyes. She had just witnessed the ruthless saiyan warriors kill off three of her closest friends and Piccolo. She had sadly watched the T.V. as her boyfriend of many years (I couldn't be bothered to count them.), Yamucha, was blown up by a little green thing.
For the past couple of hours the Television had been blank, but no one had moved from their spot watching it. Just in case it came back on, but it wouldn't come back on. The large saiyan known as Nappa had completely wiped out all the news crews that had stationed themselves on the island.
The other occupants of Kame House were just as silent as Bulma. Master Roshi was staring at the floor in obvious concentration. The glazed over look in his eyes was the only thing that showed his concentration was far away. The Ox King sat on the middle of the room fanning his daughter Chi Chi who had fallen over in a dead faint. The shape shifting pig Oolong sat over his friend Puars body. Puar had fainted at the sight of Yamuchas' dead body.
"Oh. I really wish we could see what was going on." Bulma grumbled out and snapped everyone out of their stupor's. "Damn those saiyans. What did we do to deserve this?" Chi Chi looked up at her blue haired friend from her position lying on the floor. There was nothing she had to say about that. If there was such thing as Karma, it was being particularly unfair right about now.
Everyone jumped a foot in the air when a sudden knock was heard on the door. Master Roshi looked at the door in surprise. "Now who would be here at a time like this?" Master Roshi got up and walked over to the door, he was soon followed by the rest of the gang. The martial arts master opened the door and stared at the person in front of him. It was none other then his wrinkly old sister. The fortune teller Baba.
"What are you doing here?" Master Roshi asked.
"I thought that you might want to watch the fight." Baba smiled at the rest of the onlookers. They all nodded with a dazed look in their eyes.
Suddenly they realized what Baba had said and without warning Oolong, Bulma and Chi Chi grabbed the crystal from underneath the fortune teller. With a scream of indignation the fortune teller was pulled inside the small pink house.
Once the crazy mob had put the short pink haired woman down she straightened out her dress and placed her hands on the crystal ball. Baba cleared her throat and began chanting. "Crystal Ball, Crystal Ball show the fight to end it all." Everyone crowded in around the ball to see what it would show. A light flickered into existence somewhere in the depths of the crystal and an image popped up suddenly like a television.
The group watched for the next half of an hour in amazement as their fearless hero Goku fought a fairly evenly matched battle against the flame haired saiyan named Vegeta. What a nut case this guy was. Apparently he had killed his own team mate. This was something Bulma couldn't figure out. Why did this guy have team mates in the first place. Who would actually want to spend their time with this guy?
The group had to shield their eyes as the two super powered warriors began putting out so much energy that the crystal ball was lighting up like a Christmas tree. A Christmas tree that just happened to be on fire. The whole group backed up a couple steps as a the crystal ball began to fizzle with electricity. "I don't know how much more of this your ball can take." Master Roshi said while eyeing the ball warily.
Baba looked at her brother in indignation, "Why, I'll have you know that my crystal ball can take much more then this." Baba spat at the wrinkled old man and then turned to look at the ball, but as soon as the words had left her mouth bolts of electricity began jumping around the room, blowing up any electrical devices that they hit. The group cried out in fright and ducked close to the ground.
The group watched in slow motion as twin bolts of electricity shot out from the crystal ball and trailed along the floor before they landed on Bulma and Chi Chi. Suddenly all the electricity in the room stopped and the group looked around. The two women inspected themselves for a couple seconds. "Well, that wasn't to bad." Bulma said quietly. She was surprised that she was even alive. That electricity had blown up the television and yet she hadn't felt any pain.
Chi Chi was about to agree when she began feeling funny. "I don't feel to good." She said and held her head in her hands. Bulma had to agree with her. With out any warning both of the women vanished. No noise, no light shows. They just vanished. How boring.
Bulma and Chi Chi found themselves floating in some sort of tunnel made out of swirling colors and they were traveling at incredible speeds. They looked at each other for a couple seconds before they were separated and sent down different tunnels. Bulmas' last thought in the tunnel was, 'This can't be good.'
Chi Chis' last thought had been, 'I sure hope I don't miss laundry day. Gohan doesn't have any clean underwear. Not to mention I haven't seen him in almost a year and I bet that horrible green guy didn't make him take his bathes. He's going to be so dirty, and he doesn't have his special shampoo. He's going to have the worst split ends.'
-- Kame House --
The group stared at the spots that the two women used to be. "Chi Chi!" The Ox King called out, hoping to locate his missing daughter. No one had any clue what had happened. Not even Baba. Her crystal ball had never failed her like this before.
Master Roshi was the first to fully collect himself, or so he thought. He decided that they wouldn't get anywhere if they kept gawking at empty space and opened up his mouth to break the silence with the most intelligent thing he could think to say, "Uh... Duh... What the Doodles?"
This simple sentence did manage to break everyone out of their stupor's as they began staring at the martial arts master. Oh well. it doesn't look like they're going to be making any progress any time soon.
-- Somewhere in the center of Satan City --
Bulma got up from her position lying on the ground. She rubbed the spot where she had bumped her head. "Where am I?" She remarked to no one in particular. She looked around her and deduced that she was in some sort of back alley way. 'Well, better have a look around.' she thought to herself and strode out of the alley. she squinted in the sun light and noticed that she was now standing directly in front of a large bill board sign for a movie preview. The sign proclaimed the the movie 'The Satantrix Revolutions' would be playing in theaters on...
"What the Hell?" Bulma called out, "They're advertising for a movie that won't come out for another thirteen years." Bulma didn't have a clue what was going on.
Most of the passers by on the street paid her no attention. One man who had over heard her stopped and looked at her strangely, "That movies coming out tomorrow." He said kindly.
Bulma stared at the man, "What's today's date?"
"July third." stated the man
Bulma groaned inwardly. July third? That's not right, "What is the year?"
The man looked surprised, "It's the year Seven-hundred and Seventy-four." The man walked off like a character in a video game once they have said everything they are programed to say. They're so rude, aren't they.
Bulma stood still for a couple minutes. She was in the future, and she didn't know how to get back.
'Well. If I'm in the future it would probably be best if I go track myself down. That shouldn't be too hard. I am famous, and if I have two genius's working on getting me home, then I have a much better chance. I guess the best place to start would be to go home.' Bulma pulled out a capsule and clicked the button. She threw the capsule on the ground and it changed into a car.
Bulma had one foot in the car when she realized that she didn't know where she was. She stood up again and surveyed the area around her. Her eyes fell on a large building. 'Perfect.' She thought to herself as she stared at orange star high school.
-- Somewhere In The Wilderness --
Chi Chi sat up. She was sitting on a patch of grass on top of a grassy knoll. She looked around at her surroundings. "What in the world happened?" Chi Chi shook her head and really concentrated on where she was. She was sitting in a large clearing surrounded by tall trees. A short distance away from her was a tall tree and on the other side of the clearing a dirt path was meandering it's way through the forest. "I know where I am." Chi Chi said suddenly. This is Mount Paozu . I wonder how I got here though. Well, the only thing to do now would be to go home."
Chi Chi stood up and walked in the direction of the path.
Brenman: How was it? Please review and leave your answer. The options are:
A) It was fantastic! Please make more.
B) It was so great I printed out a copy and stuck it on my refrigerator.
C) It was amazing and I bookmarked it.
or D) I own a publishing company and even though it's illegal I'm going to publish it in the next book we print.