You can't cry. You can't.
You watch them kiss, their lips locking together on the stage, her fingers tangled in his hair. Your heart aches and you suppress the tears. Andre is right next to you. No one can know. The only thing that keeps you going is that she's happy. She melted in his kiss so happily, like she was complete. Part of you wishes that she would look at you like that.
9 months. You have pined after her for 9 months. When they broke up, you started to see the real Jade, the one underneath the shell. You saw her the day she gave you back your spot for the PMA's, when she came over to help you with Cat immediately after you called without a reason. You still had your playful banter, that sexual tension (imagined?) that you wanted to cut through with your lips on hers.
But you can't now.
The whole point was for her to be happy. That's why you did this Tori. And so you could stop pining after her. She needed to be taken. And you may not have expected it to be Beck, but at least now you can't be tempted to make a move. She has him again.
Your brain tries to reason with you, telling you to calm your thrumming heart. Each beat aches within your chest and when you see that no one is watching you, you slip into Trina's car. She always keeps a spare key above the dash and you reach for it, driving yourself carefully home. Trina would find a way home, she always did. You park in front of the house, slipping up to your room quietly. Your throat is still hoarse from the sobbing you did last night when you wished again that she'd be yours, just be only yours. You want her so bad. That's why you had to do this.
"'No guys would ask her out.'"
Yes, but you would. You wanted to, so badly. But you couldn't. She still loved him, she had to. She proved that tonight. That "opposite date" with Beck had been so awkward. You wanted her, not him. But when she came bursting in through that door in the clinic, you saw the way she looked at him and you knew. You knew she still loved him. And that she would never love you the way you love her.
You curl up on your bed, turning off your phone. You feel numb but the tears start to pour out of your eyes. This is it. The end to the tragic love story. You didn't get the girl.
She's gone.