LefthandedFreak: I'm back and crazier than ever! And now, I'd like you all to meet my friend, Josh, a Figment of my Imagination.
Josh, Figment Man: (darkly) joy. I hate you all. (Lefthand hits him)
LefthandedFreak: Boy, you make Kaiba look like some sort of daisy picking freak!
Kaiba: I resent that… highly.
Josh, Figment Man: Well, I might be a bit happier if someone hadn't dragged me away from what I was doing.
LefthandedFreak: Who cares about how many Pegasus things you have? (he glares) Anyways, this is the continuation of my last story "Fate's Underhanded Tactics". This we'll be just as cool as the last one, hopefully, and with a lot less mistakes.
Josh, Figment Man: You are one big mistake. What makes you think you can prevent them? (she hits him with a fish)
LefthandedFreak: Just hush and do the Disclaimer.
Josh, Figment Man: LefthandedFreak owns nothing. NADA. Anything mentioned has either been mentioned before somewhere else or belongs entirely to someone else. Besides, do you honestly think she'd be here IF she owned Yugioh?
LefthandedFreak: Maybe, I'd just be writing in a different section. Then again, I'd also be cruising the town in a sweet convertible, giving out cheese to all those unfortunate cheese less people.
Josh, Figment Man: She lacks the brain cells people!
LefthandedFreak: (pulls out a Ryou Bakura doll) Now before I beat you with your least favorite character, let's let everyone read the story? Have Fun!
Josh, Figment Man: Help!
It was a normal day in the Kaiba mansion that Monday morning. The birds chirped, the breeze swept through the trees-
"AHHHHHHHHHH!"
-And Seto has just managed to trip over a toy train, causing him to careen forward, tipping a bit to the left, and falling, painfully, down the stairs.
Yep, perfectly normal.
Sitting up, Kaiba rubbed his head, which he should have waited to do for soon after the toy itself landed on his already bruised skull. Cursing, he pulled the toy up for a better look and raised a brow. "Um?" When had he bought a toy train?
"Oh, Seto, I'm sorry, that's mine." Ah, and here comes our lovely blonde resident now, pulling a shirt on as he careened down the stairs, just a little more balanced. Kaiba grimaced as Joey snatched the toy from his grasp.
"Why, and please make this a logical answer, do you have a toy train?" Joey appeared a bit nervous as Kaiba raised a brow.
"Um…well…", Joey stuttered, racking his feeble mind for a good answer. "Um, I like trains?" If Kaiba weren't hurt as it was, he would have proceeded to bury his head in his free hand with force.
"Really? So you decided to take your love for trains and, may I add, dangerous sports, mix them together, and test out the result on me?" He was really going to need some strong coffee at work today.
"Um, well I wasn't expecting you to trip over it and careen (AN: Notice I like this word) down the hard, solid concrete, with nice plush carpet, stairs." Joey spoke, trying to add a bit of humor to an already dead situation.
"Wow, Yugi look, there already getting into it this morning! I thought you didn't do that sort of thing before work Seto?" Yami, yet another resident, along with Yugi, proceeded down the stairs, a devilish smile on his face as Yugi rolled his eyes. Kaiba was a bit confused by what Yami had said. That is, until he looked at his current position.
"I don't. Joey decided to test out his train ramp on a poor unsuspecting victim." He grumbled as he stood up, helping Joey up as well.
"Hey, success!" Joey chuckled but stopped at Kaiba's glare. "Ahah….um, actually, it was an accident." Yami seemed a little too happy about this.
"Hmm, I didn't think I'd have to 'punish' you this early!" Yugi rolled his eyes again.
"I swear Yami, if I didn't love you, I would never have showed you anything about sex. You've become a fiend!" Yami just laughed openly as Kaiba glanced at his watch. "Anyways, what was that about a toy?" Joey shrugged and revealed the small wooden object.
Yami eyed the toy, almost like he was suspecting it to capture his soul, as Yugi raised a brow.
"Um, why do you have a toy train?" Well, as any reasonable person would have done, they would most likely decide to answer with their great and brilliant answer from earlier! Everything would match and no one would think anything else.
But, this is Joey were talking about.
"Oh, is that the time? I got to go bye!" And before anyone could say another word, Joey had dashed down the hall and out the door. Yami peered at the door.
"That was…. sudden."
"I've never seen him move so fast…well, unless it's for food.." Yugi added.
"Or sex!" Yami chirped.
"Oh it's always sex with you isn't it?"
"Why not? It's not too bad is it?"
"If your not allergic"
"People our allergic to sex!" Yami seemed shocked by the idea.
"Something's up." Kaiba, who was still looking at the door, snagged Yugi and Yami's attention, voiced his wisdom.
"How do you know that?" Yugi asked inquisitive like. (AN: Awww)
"Well, a couple of reasons actually. Reason One: Joey has been wandering out everyday this week, including Sunday, yet he hasn't mentioned a job like he would and isn't complaining. Reason Two: He seems glum a bit when he leaves and then when he returns, he's cheerful. And Reason Three.." Kaiba pointed to the floor.
A rubber duck peeked happily at the three that where staring at it.
"So…does he need to be punished?"
Even the duck managed a look.
"What?"
So that's how our dynamic duo, due to the fact that Kaiba had work, were tailing Joey in hopes of finding what he was doing. Through trees and bushes, across ponds and alley's, when they could have just tailed him since he was on busy sidewalk but, hey, who ever heard of a good tailing scene doing something so simple as that?
Anyways, Yami, after performing a neat duck and roll to a very un neat and extremely thin pole, you know, the kind not worth hiding behind, peeked his head out and watched as Joey strolled into a park.
"Yami, what are you doing?" Yugi, a bit undramaticly, stood behind Yami and stared down at his crazy counterpart, who was at the moment, trying to figure out how to keep both feet from being seen.
"Hiding nonchalantly!" Yami replied as Yugi rolled his eyes.
"This is going to be a long day." With that, he pulled Yami out from behind the pole. "Don't worry about hiding, you look silly. Let's worry about Joey!" He pointed to the blonde teen.
They both stopped and watched what he was doing. He was smiling, like he hadn't done for a few days without force, and passing out toys, including the train, to the children who were playing.
"Um, Yugi, is Joey having a mental problem? I think he thinks he's Santa."
"Yami, that's an establishment problem your thinking about and I hope not." Yugi corrected.
"So? It has to do with the mind too, right?"
"I guess so but mental seems to be considered crazy"
"But an establishment problem also has to do with being crazy, right?"
"Not precisely. Sometimes it means having a hard time fitting in."
"……. So why would he think he's Santa if he's having trouble fitting in?"
"Guys, what are you doing here?" Yugi and Yami both jumped, too deep in conversation to notice that Joey had spotted quite a while ago and had approached them. He was fiddling with his shirt.
"Oh Joey, we where just, uh?… Yami, why don't you tell him?" Yugi laughed nervously, nudging Yami in the side.
"Um, well, we where um…"Yami thought hard.
"Following me right?" Yami nodded quickly as Yugi buried his head in his hands.
"That's it…uh, I mean no".
"No need to deny it. I kind of figured you guys would try and follow me. So I guess your wondering why I'm here?" Joey questioned.
"That and if you have a mental or establishment problem." Yami inquired lightly as Joey glanced at Yugi who just shook his head.
"Um, right. Uh, let's sit down and I'll answer your… questions"
After finding a bench that wasn't covered in filth and occupied, the three sat down, Joey a little bit more uncomfortable. Joey looked at the ground, Yugi looked at Joey, and Yami, well, that's not important. After a bit of uncomfortable silence Yugi spoke.
"So, mind telling us why your acting like some sort of miracle toy giver?"
"And why you've been down lately?" Yami, magically, decided to act serious. Not like he couldn't, he had just recently figured out what humor was called and was trying to use it whenever.
Joey sighed. "Well, it's kind of weird. See, um, I sort of-"
"Oh my god, Joey, please tell me your not 'attracted' to children!" Yami sputtered as Yugi tried to hold back a giggle.
"What, no, nothing like that. DEFINITELY nothing like that. Thing is, I want to, oh, how should I put this, have a child" If looks could talk Yugi would have been saying a million words.
So Yami decided to help him out. "Oh, well, um, can't really help that since your not equipped correctly and-" Joey sighed.
"I didn't mean literally! But I would like us to have a child, all together, but the thing is we'd never have time. Kaiba's always so busy, you two are hardly ever home, and I don't know the first thing about raising a kid." Yugi glanced at Yami.
"Well, we could always work something out. I mean, we are sort of young to be worrying about children, but I'm sure Seto could do something. Besides, I'm sure if he had a child, he'd make sure to be home most of the time to help."
"Yeah, he's not that heartless!" Joey, Yugi, and Yami nearly jumped fifty feet. A young blonde woman had suddenly appeared out of nowhere, leaning against the park bench, smiling sweetly at the three. It took a moment of shock to actually realize who she was.
"Aphrodite! What are you doing here?" Aphrodite pouted at Joey's question.
"Oh, I see, just cram me with questions, see if I care. Don't bother to say you've missed me, oh no, don't be nice.." Yugi hugged her as she stood stiffly.
"Ah, come on, you know we've missed you, a bit since we hardly knew you all too much, but it's kind of hard not to ask questions when you've been gone for about five months without contacting." Aphrodite relaxed a bit and sighed.
"Yeah, I know, we've been having some difficulty upstairs. Replacing Hades is like pulling teeth an no everyone think the position on Fate is jinxed…" she paused and looked at the others. "Which reminds me of why I'm here. We finally found Fate's last request."
The three smiled!
"Bad news is, we can't translate it. She wrote it in some secret language of hers. That's Fate for you. Can't do anything simple without making it challenging first." She sighed. "But don't worry, we're working our hardest to find out what she wanted. So, what's this I hear about wanting a child?"
Yugi spoke for Joey seeing that the blonde really didn't want to talk about it again. "Well, see, Joey's, what do woman call it, clock, is ticking." Aphrodite burst into laughter.
"Oh, Joey now how's paternal instinct! Funny, never really met a man with one!" Joey buried his face in his hands.
"I don't LITERALLY want to have one I'd just like to have someone to raise, as my own child. Is that too hard to comprehend?"
"Chill tiger, I understand you. I just thought what Yugi said was funny, not you actually wanting a kid. I think it's great!" The three looked at her.
"Really?" Joey inquired.
"Yes, really. You all seem capable of raising one. I mean, not considering the fact that your all seventeen and sex crazed, I think you'd be fine parents."
"Well, no matter how fine we may be, Kaiba would never go for it. He still has Mokuba to raise. He wouldn't have time." Aphrodite didn't say anything at this, just smiled slyly.
"Well, I think you just need to talk to him, that's all. Now due to terrible inconvenience, and because I want to, I must take my leave. As soon as we find out Fate's last request, we'll contact you." With a small pop, just for effect, she disappeared, leaving our three guys to talk.
But where has Aphrodite gone?
Kaiba sat at his desk, burying the back of his head into his comfy chair and sighing. He may not be able to spend a lot of time in a comfy bed but this was just as good. Eyes closed, he carefully reached out to grab his coffee, searching his desk to no avail.
"Is this what your looking for?" Kaiba nearly fell out of his chair as he opened his eyes, finding Aphrodite sitting in the air inches away, coffee in hand.
"You know, you really shouldn't sneak up on people." Aphrodite shrugged.
"You really shouldn't jump. You could have knocked this on me you know." Kaiba, pulling himself back into his chair, sat up rigidly, as if he where in some sort of business meeting.
"Oh don't seat stiff. I'm not pulling your teeth out you know. Besides, it's bound to be bad for your back" She waited for Kaiba to loosen up a bit before floating down and sitting on the edge of his desk.
"I came to talk to you about Fate's last request." Aphrodite played with a paperweight as Kaiba carefully took his coffee, eyeing her as he did so.
"Why didn't you wait until I was with the others? I'm sure they'd like to know it." She shrugged lightly before glancing at him.
"Oh, they will, but it was more of a thing you'd be able to solve. See, she wanted the last couple she ever worked with to have a kid. A girl to be precise." Kaiba raised a brow.
"Well that's sort of, um, weird to say. I mean, we are guys you know. Anyway, we could have kids later." Aphrodite shook her head.
"She pacifically said as soon as this is read." Kaiba looked at her.
"So why are you just now talking to me?"
"We had to translate it." She shrugged before tipping the weight over, causing a dull thud. Kaiba sighed. He really didn't know if he had time for a kid or if the other three even knew how to raise one. But Fate had clearly stated what she had wanted and seeing how she did get him together with the others…
"Alright. I'll talk to the others about it. We'll see about adoption." Aphrodite smile darkened.
"That's the problem. She also stated that she wanted the child to be a product of the couple. No adoptions. And as seeing as all of you are males, this makes it a bit difficult. We can't just make you pregnant, that'd take decades to work out the jinks, so we're sort of stuck. That's why I came to you. I wanted to see if you'd know what to do."
"Well, under the circumstances, no, I don't." He shook his head. "She just had to make this hard." He paused for a second. "Tell me, exactly how did she state the whole letter, or whatever?" Aphrodite glanced at him and paused.
Seconds later, with a small poof, a square object with buttons and numbers appeared.
It was Jerald the Calculator. "You called Aphrodite?" Kaiba eyed the object, having seen it before. He had never really met this, Jerald, but Yami spoke avidly, almost regrettably, about him.
"Yes Jerald. Did you bring my copy of Fate's request?" Jerald promptly pulled the paper out of the air, with his little calculator body, and slid it over to Aphrodite. "Thank you." Clearing her throat, she addressed Kaiba.
"Dear Whoever,
I really don't know how this stupid thing works. Seems a little trivial to me. Oh well. Anyways, I've decided what my last request will be! That's why I'm here.-"
Kaiba rolled his eyes, keeping a hard look, though he really wanted to smile. Only Fate would make a last request sound like some sort of Diary entry.
"-Seeing that I really don't have much to offer I've decided to make this a bit simple. I would really like if the last couple that I get together, because Aphrodite's slacking, and Dity, if you're reading this, phooey on you, would have a child. And not just any child.
A child made of their love! I'm not against adoption or anything I'd just like for this to happen. I don't really care how they have the child, just as long as it's born of their love for each other. Also, if the couple seems a bit harmful, like the cembalist and that psycho clown I worked with, ignore them. Find a couple suitable! Thank you.
Till whenever
Fate" Aphrodite folded the sheet back up. Kaiba was thinking, leaning against the back of his chair. It seemed to involve a lot of brain cells due to the look on his face. Then again, he probably looked like that every time he thought.
"This is aggravating", Kaiba broke the silence as he ran his hands through his hair. "How am I supposed to do this? I'm not a miracle worker. Besides, the others may not be up to it." Aphrodite shook her head.
"Actually, you know how Joey's been acting lately?" Kaiba raised a brow. What did that have to do with anything?
"Yeah"
"Well, it's because he wants a child. It seems weird especially for his age, I know, but he seems so consumed by this. You know, he goes to the park to play with the kids there?" Kaiba just stared at her as she sighed at the thought. "You know he has a way with kids"
"He would have told me if he wanted a child." Aphrodite peered at him, uncrossing her legs and tilting closer.
"Are you sure? You've seen how he's become. I myself would have waited to tell you this, allowing to figure out how we would make this work, if he wasn't so down."
"But why would he hide it?"
"Maybe he's afraid that you'll disapprove? You do have a company and your little brother, who I've heard is getting along great in that boarding school he wanted to go to, to take of. He doesn't want to force you to do something you don't want to."
Kaiba sat in silence for a moment as he peered at Aphrodite. She was probably right. Besides, he couldn't stand seeing Joey so down. He looked like death had crossed over. He wanted to make Joey happy. He also wanted to know something.
"Did you send a little girl to my house last Sunday? Joey started acting really down after talking to some girl that supposedly showed up on our doorstep but I checked. There was no trace of her even being there." Aphrodite raised a brow.
"No, we didn't send anyone. Wonder who she was." Kaiba nodded, excepting this answer as enough.
"Alright. I'll do what I can. I want to make Joey happy." Aphrodite smiled.
"And it might say that you're sorry for not always being able to be home." Kaiba nodded as Aphrodite stood.
"I'll keep in contact with you. Try to think of something. We will. Jerald." Kaiba had forgotten all about the calculator as it floated to her side before they disappeared.
"Fate, you sure know how to cause confusion."
Kaiba: Aphrodite lied?
LefthandedFreak: maybe(looking for Josh) blast he's a good hider.
Kaiba: He's a smart man.
LefthandedFreak: Watch it stick boy.
Kaiba: I loathe you with every fiber of my being.
LefthandedFreak: Just be happy that I actually finished this chapter. Anyways, hopefully it wasn't too boring or too confusing. Till next time! (Flips over a pot Finds Josh.)
Josh, Figment Man: EEP! (Runs away) Read and Review!