It was August
It was August. August 1st, but that didn't matter. The point was, it was August. And things were drawing nearer and nearer. My blood seemed to have mixed with something else, formed into something that pumped out nothing but nervousness and excitement, everything radiating off of me at the same time. It was hard to remember what was up and what was down, and as Alice danced around me lovingly, she was literally so excited she was swirling about as I stared into the mirror. I realized that soon, this dress I was wearing would be seen by everyone I had known since my time in Forks.
"You look beautiful, absolutely perfect!" she chirped, clapping. Alice's enthusiasm hadn't stopped in all the time she had been working on the wedding, it seemed to grow more and more as the time went by. As I had told her, I was letting her do whatever she wanted, because we would only do this once—the right way. The idea that I might marry Edward again a million times in the eternity to come since butterflies to my stomach, and my heart raced automatically. I clutched at my stomach and groaned.
I had to admit, the dress did look nice on me. In no way did I look perfect, and Edward could show up covered in mud and tar and he'd still look much better than I did, but the dress still had some nice qualities to it, and having it on wasn't quite as terrible as I had been thinking it would be. To be completely honest, I had been putting off actually slipping the dress on for as long as I could manage; before Alice, completely exasperated, demanded I try it on to make sure it would fit. Of course, she knew good and well it would fit just fine, but she got such pleasure out of the idea of seeing me in it that I glumly agreed to let her put it on. Edward waited outside, probably picking at Alice's thoughts to see just how I looked. I hope Alice had enough tact to think about something else while she saw me in the dress. I didn't want him to see the dress on me already, and I was too worried about what he'd think.
Finally, Alice seemed uninterested in the dress any longer, and I very eagerly let her zip me out of it. Soon, I was back into my normal clothes, and before I was even done pulling open the door, Edward's arms were around me. I looked up in his face and noticed he looked quite smug, something that never meant anything good for me. However, I didn't have time to push the matter, because I was already yawning into his chest. He smiled, his cool fingertips trailing across my cheek.
"You're tired, Bella." He told me, trying to look less like he knew something I didn't know. "I think it's time to take you home." I wanted to protest, still worried about what he was so happy about, but I yawned again, and I knew there was no chance I was getting anything out of him now. It had been a long day; I'd spent the whole day with Alice and Edward making wedding preparations. It had been insanely meaningless tasks, or at least, it seemed to me. Alice showed me napkins and napkin rings, the china patterns for the plates that she had picked out, and the many different forks, knives, and spoons that would be in front of every dinner guest at my wedding. She had once promised I wouldn't have to do a thing, and it seemed all she wanted was my approval. Of course, everything she picked suited me just fine, and she could see in the future what I would say, anyway, but she seemed adamant about going through the motions.
I was so tired that I didn't notice as Edward skillfully scooped me up into his arms and carried me out the door. I didn't bother to protest Edward driving me home; however, he skipped my truck in favor for one of his sleeker, faster cars.
"Why do you seem to be in such a hurry to get me home?" I muttered, cuddling myself into the leather interior. I was much more tired than I thought.
"Just excited for tonight." Edward told me, and my eyebrows furrowed—what was he talking about? "Apparently, Alice made me more sleepy than we meant to." He mused.
Of course, everything he was saying was just turning into useless gibberish, and through my lethargic state I tried to make sense of his words.
"What's tonight?" I asked, and Edward was going even faster than usual-- very excited to get me home, I guessed, but why?
Edward turned to me, flashing a brilliant smile, and I melted. I suddenly forgot what I had been asking. Sooner or later, I was going to have to learn how to get past that trick. "You'll see." Was all he told me, and we were already at my house.
My mind was racing, could it be what I had been hoping for for so long? I didn't think it would be possible, and if it was, I didn't know if I'd be able to control myself. He had tried to give it to me, and I had told him no, but I didn't know if I had that restraint any more. My self-control was hardly there in the first place—I couldn't stand to have it be tested now, when it seemed to be dwindling. I no longer felt tired at all.
Edward had undone my seatbelt and was now helping me out of the car? Why wasn't he carrying me in, busting the door down, doing something? The door seemed so trivial now, and my heartbeat was erratic, it was all I could hear in my ears…
Then, Edward opened the door, and standing calmly in my kitchen as if this was something that happened all the time, were 20 of my closest female acquaintances.
My eyebrows went up and scarlet filled my cheeks. "No." I mouthed, and I automatically turned to hide my face in Edward's chest, even though I was enraged with him at the moment.
It was a bridal shower.
And he had suckered me right in.
Minutes later, Alice was there, obviously very excited that I hadn't made a run for it. Charlie was nowhere to be found, which was good. I didn't expect him to be too happy with the idea of a bridal shower. Since we told him about the engagement, he seemed to get more and more morose as the days dwindled, as if he could sense that I'd be stolen right from under him once Edward and I were married. He had turned quiet, reserved, and he wouldn't talk to me much. I had expected it, but it still hurt when I tried to press and he'd just give me a sad smile and tell me he had to go off to work or go fishing or do something else to get out of the house. It had been a hard few months.
Edward left soon enough, after laughing and whispering in my ear that he would be upstairs. Of course he wouldn't leave; he wouldn't want to miss this. I was going to have to make sure he understood the extent of my anger later.
Over the next hour I didn't know what exactly I was doing. I smiled and played bridal games, hugged a few people and hoped they'd come to the wedding. The minutes felt like hours, and it was mortifying being the center of attention. Once again, Alice was the one putting me into these situations she thought I would just adore. Edward, however, knew better.
Then, something happened to break me out of my reverie. Rosalie, who had been hiding in the back for quite some time, holding a cup of punch that I was sure was probably half-full to begin with, walked toward me with a deliberateness. Her voice seemed slow, calculated, measured.
"Can I speak with you in private?" she asked me, gesturing toward the door. I didn't know why, but I grew nervous. Somehow, I knew whatever the outcome, this would not be good. But I couldn't say no to her, not when I was trying to make sure things were okay between us. We excused ourselves outside and she ran a hand through her perfect hair, everything so perfect on Rosalie.
"I don't want to have to do this." She whispered, "I especially don't want to have to do this tonight, Bella, when you should be enjoying your party. But I have to try."
My throat felt like it was closing, and I wanted to leave, to go back inside. I was too tired for this, whatever it was. I was already panicking, and all she wanted to do was talk.
"There's no way I can talk you out of this?" even though she didn't tell me what she meant, I knew exactly what she was thinking of. I didn't know why we were continuing this conversation. I was well aware, however, of how much what I was doing hurt her.
"I hope you can forgive me," was all I could say, and I was looking at the ground.
I looked up in time to see her nod, stony-faced, silent. "I don't know if that will be possible, but I can try my hardest."
And I didn't know what had happened, but for a second Rosalie's eyes flashed, and I felt something cold wrapping itself around my waist.
"I expected that." Rosalie nodded once again, her voice grim. I turned to see that the cold had been Edward, who was looking at her with an odd face, a growl coming from his chest.
"It was just a thought." She suddenly said, her voice defensive.
"Keep your thoughts to yourself, then." Edward snapped, and Rosalie glowered.
"Obviously that is not as easy as you'd think!" Rosalie's fists were clenched. Apparently, I had missed something very important in those seconds between Rosalie's silence and Edward's arrival.
"I think," Edward said each word carefully. "It's time for you to go back inside, Rosalie."
"You've over-reacting." Her voice was barely a whisper; I was surprised I could hear it at all. "You know me better than to think I would have gone through it with it."
"I'm not taking any chances." Edward told her tonelessly, tightening his grip on me. I had no idea what he was going on about, but I just wanted to get him alone to ask what I had missed.
Rosalie gave me one last fleeting glance and she was gone, back through the door. It didn't take me long to turn on Edward.
"What was that?!" I demanded, putting my hands on my hips, demanding an explanation. My anger at him for the party was distant, off in another place. I hated when he used his power to know things I did not.
Edward's tone was bleak. "Rosalie thought just for a moment that, maybe, she ought to scare you away. Just far away to not come back—she wouldn't have done anything that would have mattered much. But I just…." He shook his head. I still felt like there was more to this story, as if he was spending his whole time trying to choose his words.
"Don't make me go back to that party," I groaned, pushing myself into him once again.
He smiled, leaning down and kissing my hair. "So, you want to sneak off?" he grinned, pulling up my hand and kissing my wrist delicately.
"Yes, please." I said, closing my eyes. I was so tired, and I still had so many questions, but the most important of which needed to be going to sleep.
"I suppose we've put you through enough torture for tonight." He pulled me up and held me tight to his chest, walking me commonly to the window, and then jumped up and through it at is this was nothing. I hardly noticed anything after that, though I was a little aware of him putting me under the covers and tucking me in, then settling himself up against me. "Goodnight, my little bride." He joked, kissing my temple.
I sighed, trying not to think too much about Edward's favorite new pet name.