A/N: The beginning of this and the voicemail message scenes are directly from the PP2 script, and these are scenes that were either cut or edited. I decided to fill in the blanks yet again in a pathetic attempt to get over the fact that Jeca was cut from the movie. I know, it's been a year, but it still makes me mad. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this…
She glances toward his car, packed to the brim with everything he owns, before turning her attention back to him. She's trying not to cry, so she takes a deep breath, the air puffing out of her lungs with a heavy sigh.
"I guess this is it, the big goodbye," she tells him.
"Bec, don't be sad. We knew this day was coming," he says. "I was always going to graduate early and go to film school."
"Still stings," she replies before adding, "Oh yeah, I got you a going away present." She pulls a gift from her bag and hands it to him. He opens it to reveal a copy of E.T. "You'll like it," she tells him, "It's about a strange, awkward outsider who leaves home and tries to fit in."
He cuts her off with a chuckle, "Beca, I've seen E.T."
"You have?" her expression is shocked and he finds it endearing. "It came out like a hundred years before we were born. How do you know this stuff?"
He smiles fondly at her before taking her hand and giving it a squeeze, "Thank you, I love it. We'll watch it together."
She laughs, "Really? Both hours?" she teases.
He shakes his head, "Still not a movie person." He stares at her intently, trying to read her emotions.
She turns her attention back to his car, not meeting his gaze, "Well, take care of yourself," she says without feeling.
"Take care of myself? What are you, my Aunt Delores?" he shakes his head at her.
"I just mean like don't get hit by a falling meteor or fall asleep holding a lit cigarette," she trails off.
"No, what you mean is that you think we're not going to make it," he corrects.
"C'mon Jess. Let's be real. This is exactly how relationships die," she pauses before continuing. "Look, I'm not upset you're pursuing your dream. I think that's great. But it means you're moving to the other side of the country. While I stay here to do my thing. And…we're young. We're growing apart. It's happening."
"Uh-uh," he shakes his head, "It's not going to happen. A couple of time zones could never come between us. So nice try. We'll be together again. I promise." He picks up his bag to go.
"When? When will we be together again?" she asks, trying to hold her the desperation in her voice in check.
Jesse starts to answer but says nothing. Softly, he tells her, "We'll figure it out. I gotta go."
He pulls her toward him, his lips meeting hers in a soft kiss. She grips his shoulders, pulling him down to her level before wrapping her arms around his neck. She deepens the kiss, tangling her tongue with his. She hears the rumble of a moan deep in his throat and she smiles into the kiss, knowing the effect she's always had on him. She kisses him like it's the last time she'll ever kiss him, pouring all of her feelings into this one moment. His knees buckle slightly before he reluctantly pulls away, touching her forehead with his briefly before turning to leave. He gets into the car and with one last wave to her, he drives away.
As tears begin to fill her eyes, she watches as the car disappears from sight. "Take care of yourself," she says to its retreating form before turning and walking through the snow back to the Bella house.
She tries to keep herself busy, but his absence is palpable. She knows that her friends are watching her carefully, waiting for that moment where she loses it and falls apart, but Beca isn't that girl. She's not going to fall apart over some guy, even one she knows she's in love with. She has plenty to do between classes, the Bellas, and her internship. She tells herself that even if Jesse were here right now she wouldn't have time for him anyway, but it doesn't really ease her loneliness.
At first, they're texting and video chatting all the time, but after he gets settled and his classes begin, the texts and chats grow fewer and farther between. It's difficult, with the time zone difference and their busy schedules, to find the time to talk. Her heart aches for him, but she tries to keep herself in check when she talks to him. It simply hurts too much.
She hates that she misses him. She hates that she allowed him to become such an integral part of her life. She always vowed to never need anyone, that she was better on her own. But somehow, he snaked his way into her heart and she fell for him, hard. She feels stupid, because she knew this was going to happen. He would leave eventually. It's not like it was a surprise, like he said, this was always part of his plan to go to film school. Before they had always talked about her eventually joining him in Los Angeles, but now she's working at Residual Heat. She just doesn't know about anything anymore.
Jesse, in turn, can feel her pulling away from him. He knew she would, because he knows her well. Beca doesn't handle emotions or pain very well, but she insisted that he follow his dreams, that she couldn't be the one to stand in his way, and so he left. He was certain that they could survive anything. He loves her so completely, and he doesn't think he'll ever love anyone else the way that he loves her. And even though he's expressed that many times before, he knows there's always going to be a part of her that doesn't believe him—the same part of her that was damaged when her dad left. He gets it, but it doesn't make it hurt any less when he feels her slowly slipping away from him, acting upon her own foolish self-fulfilling prophecy. He tries to tell her how much he loves her when they talk, but she always cuts him off with small talk about the Bellas or her classes. His heart aches for her, but he hopes that they can survive this, that he won't lose her entirely.
He's vaguely aware that some of the girls in his new program are hitting on him, but he barely pays attention to them. He dives into his studies, figuring the least he can do in all this mess is earn good grades which might end up landing him a good job.
When Beca's boss tells her to give him her demos, she immediately calls Jesse to tell him the good news. He of course fills her with encouragement and tells her he knew she could do it, and her heart is swelling with pride. When her boss doesn't say anything about the demos she gave him, she gets up the nerve to ask, and is heartbroken and ashamed of his reaction that what she does is nothing special. How is she ever going to make it as a music producer?
Late that evening she picks up the phone, on the verge of tears from her stressful day at Residual Heat. It immediately goes to voicemail and she listens to Jesse's outgoing message and waits for the beep, "Hey it's me. You probably won't be able to even hear this message because as it turns out, I have nothing to say. Um, that's music industry speak for "I suck" so… You're definitely sleeping right now. That's cool. Hopefully this isn't us growing apart." She sighs heavily, "But it sorta feels like it is." She hastily adds, "This is Beca." She hangs up and tosses her phone on the bed.
Fat Amy does an ok job of trying to cheer her up, but what she really needs is Jesse. Before when she'd freak out or get insecure, he was always there to hold her, or tell her exactly what she needs to hear. She misses him so much it physically hurts. Eventually, she passes out on her bed from sheer exhaustion.
She wakes with a start and immediately reaches for her phone but she doesn't have any missed calls or texts from Jesse. Frowning, she heads to the shower before classes. She rationalizes that he must have not gotten the message because he's still asleep, the time in L.A. being three hours earlier than where she is. She knows he has a crazy busy schedule and she tries not to read too much into his silence, but by the time her phone rings with his incoming call, she'd be lying if she said she wasn't at least a little angry with him.
"Hey," she says hesitantly into the phone.
"Beca!" he exclaims, "I'm so sorry it took me this long to get back to you. I passed out last night early and I didn't wake up until just now. I must have been exhausted because I don't usually sleep that long. It's just that my schedule is so crazy right now. But anyway, are you going to tell me what's going on?"
She contemplates it for a split second before responding, "Oh I'm fine, it was nothing. Just a brief moment of insecurity. No big deal."
"It sounded big to me," he sighs heavily into the phone, "Beca, please just talk to me. I know this is hard, being apart. It's hard for me too. But I don't want to lose you."
She's glad that they aren't video chatting and he can't see the tears that threaten to spill from her eyes. "Beca," he pleads again.
"He didn't like my demos," she finally admits, "He said they weren't original, that anyone there could do what I do. I don't know if I have what it takes."
"Yes you do," he insists, "You're the most talented person I know."
She scoffs, "That's what Amy said too," she responds, "But I don't feel talented. I can't even come up with a set for Worlds."
"Beca," he says, his tone holding so much emotion, "I wish I could hold you right now, you have no idea."
"Me too," she whispers, her voice barely audible over the phone. There's a moment of silence before a female voice interrupts them on his end of the line.
"Jesse?" the voice asks, and Beca's heart drops.
"Who is that?" she questions, her voice coming out like a hiss.
"It's just Alexa, my friend from class," he explains. "We usually drive over to class together because she lives in my building."
"And she just lets herself in your room? Or was she already there?" Beca asks, and this time the anger in her voice is obvious.
"You're reading too much into this. I swear we are just friends," he insists.
"Right, just like we were just friends freshman year," she replies scathingly. "I have to go," she adds.
"Beca," he begins, but she hangs up before he can say anything else. He stares at his phone for a while before turning to look at Alexa. "Well that went well," he says sarcastically and she laughs. He turns away from Alexa and feels her come up behind him.
"Long distance relationships almost never work," Alexa says, patting him on the arm, "Don't beat yourself up about it too much."
"You don't get it!" Jesse snaps at her, "Beca's the only one for me. She's everything!" He covers his face with his hands.
Alexa begins rubbing his back, trying to comfort him. "Well if you change your mind, you know where to find me," she says, her intentions obvious to even him at this point. He waits for Alexa to leave before picking up his phone to text Beca.
You know I love you. I've loved you from the moment I first saw you. Nothing will ever change that. Please don't give up on us.
Beca hears her phone chime and picks it up, reading his message. And it's then, months after he left, that she finally allows herself to feel his absence completely. She begins sobbing, and buries her face into her pillows, but she doesn't respond to his text. Throughout the day and the next week, he floods her phone and voicemail with messages like:
I know you're just pushing me away again, putting up your walls because this is hard and it hurts. But please Beca, I need you.
I love you so, so much. We'll find a way to work this out.
Please believe me when I say that Alexa means nothing to me. She's just a friend who happens to be female. If you want I'll never say another word to her again.
You are the most beautiful, most talented, most amazing girl I've ever met in my life. Don't give up. I love you.
She's devastated at this point, and it's then that Chloe decides that they're all going to Aubrey's ridiculous outdoor retreat for spring break as a way to get their sound back. After days of silence, she finally texts him back.
I'm sorry, I'm just hurting right now. I miss you. Can't wait until graduation.
Relief washes over him when he sees he has a message from her. But it's short lived when he sees the content. He never mentioned he wouldn't be back to Barden for graduation to walk in the ceremony with Beca and all of their friends. He has a final exam that day and he can't miss it. He decides not to tell her just yet, being that she is finally speaking to him again.
Beca tries to enjoy the retreat, but she's moody and miserable for most of it. It isn't until she realizes that Emily's song may be a big opportunity for her that she starts to lighten up a little. She does love the Bellas, no matter how much heartache she's feeling right now over Jesse. She heads back to Barden feeling happier than she has in months. They work on the song and when Beca's boss loves it she immediately calls Jesse, eager to share the news.
"That's great Bec!" he exclaims happily before telling her about his studies and catching up with her about all their friends. "Hey, Beca?" he tentatively begins, "I hate to ruin the mood here, but I can't make it back for graduation."
There's silence for a long while on her end of the line before she quietly responds, "Why not?"
"I have my last final that day, and there's no way out of it. I even checked with the professor and it's non-negotiable. I'm so sorry Beca. You have no idea how much I want to be there," he explains.
He hears her sniff into the phone, "Beca? Are you crying?"
"No," she replies, but it's obvious that she is. "I just hate this so much," she admits to him. "I'm so stressed right now. And I was looking forward to graduation because the classes would be finally over. But mostly because I was going to get to see you."
"I know," he whispers.
"And now I just don't know. I just can't keep doing this," she continues.
"Doing what?" he asks, his heart pounding.
"Emily and I are going to be working on her song after graduation. That means I'm still here and you're still there. And I just don't know if I can do it. But I can't pass up on this opportunity at Residual Heat to go to Los Angeles like we talked about. I need to see how this pans out," she says.
"I know," his tone is serious. "I would never ask you to give up your dream for me."
"And I would never ask you to, either," she adds.
"So where does that leave us?" he wonders aloud.
"I don't know," she admits.
"We'll figure it out," he insists.
"Jesse," she breathes out, and her simple utterance of his name is enough to break his heart all over again. He can hear the pain in her voice, and he knows it's because of him.
"This isn't goodbye," he affirms, "I won't let it be."
She doesn't say anything for a long while, lost in her thoughts. Finally, he hears her voice whisper, "Take care of yourself," before she hangs up the phone.
Frustrated, he throws his phone across the room. He paces the room, unsure of what he's going to do. He knew the distance was going to be difficult, but it is far worse than he ever imagined. He picks up his books and tries to study, when he hears his phone buzzing with an incoming text. Hoping it's from Beca, he picks his phone up from the floor and sees that it's from Chloe.
Beca's singing James Bay – Let It Go in the shower and crying. She doesn't know we can hear her but we're all worried. Do something! She loves you. Just thought you should know
He thanks Chloe for letting him know. If she's singing that song, she must think they're breaking up, or they have already, and he begins to panic. He begins playing the song on his phone, trying to imagine how beautiful Beca's voice would sound singing to it. The lyrics are devastating to him and hold so much emotion.
But now we're sleeping at the edge
Holding something we don't need
All this delusion in our heads
Is gonna bring us to our knees
So come on let it go
Just let it be
Why don't you be you
And I'll be me
Everything's that's broke
Leave it to the breeze
Why don't you be you
And I'll be me
He needs to do something, or he's going to lose her. He picks up his calendar and starts scanning over the days when an idea occurs to him. He goes to his laptop and starts planning right then and there.
Beca sings her heart out in the shower, and when she thinks she's gotten it out of her system, she sets to work on the Bellas set again. She has a ton of work to do in the weeks before Worlds and she needs to be focused right now. She tries her best to make it through finals and plans a great set for the Bellas to do in competition. Graduation Day comes and she admits it hurts like hell to attend the ceremony without Jesse by her side, but she shrugs it off and does her best fake smile for all the photos. She is proud of herself, after all this, that she finally made it through college.
Before she knows it, it's time for Worlds and she and the Bellas are on a plane to Copenhagen. They have a great time exploring the city. Right before they are going to go on stage for their performance, she sees that Benji has made the trip there to support Emily, and even though she's thrilled for her friends, her heart aches as she makes her way to the stage. She's so focused on the performance that she barely registers the massive crowd in front of them, and just sings her heart out on stage.
From the audience, Jesse's heart swells when he sees Beca take the stage. "That's my girl! Be-caw!" he shouts, but it doesn't seem like she notices him. Once again, Jesse is in awe of his girl and the Bellas' performance is flawless. When they finish, he screams and cheers as loudly as he can, jumping up and down holding a huge American flag. This time she notices him, and her face breaks into a breathtaking smile. He has to wait until the performances are finished and they've announced the winner as the Bellas before he attempts to get through the insane crowd and find her. She's surrounded by her friends and posing for photos when he finally spots her, and she smiles again when she spies him staring at her.
"Hey weirdo!" she shouts over the noise, and he beams at her. He frowns, disappointed that she doesn't just drop everything and run to him like he imagined, but he tries to give her some space after their six months apart. Once the photos are finished and the crowd begins to thin out a little, she makes her way over to him. She's nervous, he can tell, because she's biting her lip and twisting the rings on her fingers.
"Hey," he says softly when she reaches him.
"What are you doing here?" she asks, keeping her tone level as to not sound accusing.
"I couldn't miss this," he replies, taking her hand and squeezing it. "I couldn't miss you anymore," he adds, and she looks at her feet, unwilling to meet his gaze.
"After party at the hotel lobby bar!" Fat Amy shouts to them as she and the Bellas leave the tent. Beca kicks at something imaginary on the ground with her toe, and Jesse tugs at her hand gently.
"Come with me," she says quietly, pulling him in the direction of her hotel.
They walk quickly, with him rambling on and on about his film program and his flight. She doesn't say anything, just nods and smiles occasionally to show him she's listening. She leads him to the hotel and into the elevator. Silently, she opens the door to the room she's sharing with Amy and closes it behind them. He stands in the middle of the room, looking at her expectantly as she turns to face him.
"Ah, fuck it," she finally says and launches herself at him, the force of her tiny frame almost knocking him over. Her lips meld against his and her tongue delves into his mouth as she kisses him with all the passion she can muster. His knees buckle at the feel of her wrapping her legs around his waist and threading her fingers through his hair, and he stumbles as he walks her toward the bed. She's tearing at his shirt and soon his clothes join hers on the floor in a pile. She's kissing him everywhere and pulling him as close as possible, her hands on his hips. "Jesse, please," she pleads with him, "I need you."
With that, his resolve breaks and he pushes himself into her forcefully. She gasps as he moans her name. His hands and mouth are on her breasts and they both climax quickly together, breathing heavily as he collapses on top of her. She holds onto him tightly, brushing her fingers lightly up and down his spine as he buries his head in her hair. When he feels wetness on her cheeks he lifts his head up to look at her and sees that she's crying.
"Beca, what is it? Did I hurt you?" his eyes scan her face.
She reaches up and traces his jawline with her fingertips, "No," she whispers, "I'm just…I'm overwhelmed. I never thought this would happen again."
"What?" he asks.
"This, us," she says as he rolls off of her and sits up. She leans up, facing him. "I thought I had lost you."
"You didn't," he says firmly, "You never will."
"You keep saying that," she replies, "But I can't keep going on like this. She gets out of bed and his eyes are glued to her naked form as she paces the room.
"God, Beca," he breathes, the sight of her hair mussed from the pillow and her makeup smudged from his kisses is more than he can handle, and he's on his feet in a matter of seconds, stilling her movement as he takes both of her hands in his and stands in front of her. "You're amazing, you know that right? And you're perfect for me, in every way. I could search forever and never find anyone better for me than you, so I figure, why try? We belong together, and you know that I'm right."
"Even if I do know that, how can we be together when we never see each other? I can't go another six months without you, Jess. I just can't."
"I can't either," he admits, brushing her hair over her shoulder. "I love you, Beca."
"I love you too," she replies, and he picks her up bridal style and carries her back to the bed, placing her gently upon it before climbing in next to her. This time he makes love to her slowly, taking his time to kiss and touch her everywhere until she's trembling in his arms and moaning his name. Afterwards, they lay in the darkness together, trying to catch their breaths.
"Do you think we should go to the party?" she asks.
"I don't have any of my stuff," he replies. "It's all in my hotel room across the city. I'm going to need to get it."
"You're not going anywhere without me," she tells him firmly. They dress and leave the hotel, the streets of Copenhagen almost empty as they head in the direction of his hotel.
"Is it ok if I stay in your room tonight?" he asks her, knowing that she's sharing with Amy.
"It's fine," she replies, "Amy is already going to share with Chloe and Stacie. Stacie probably won't be back to the room tonight anyway," she laughs. She tells him more about what has happened in his absence as they hold hands and stroll down the city streets. She can't help but think how natural this is, being with him, even after so many months apart.
"I want to marry you," Jesse blurts at one point, causing Beca to drop his hand and gape at him, stunned. "I don't mean right now but someday. And I know how you hate marriage and don't believe that it can work, but I wanted you to know that I'm committed to you and I want to be with you forever. And I'm sorry if that scares you but it's the truth."
She stares at him for a moment before turning back in the direction of his hotel and continuing to walk. He falls into step beside her, waiting to hear her reaction.
"It doesn't scare me," she finally admits to him, "But we're still so young. I'm not ready yet."
"Neither am I," he answers, "But I don't want to lose you, ever. You mean too much to me. I don't think I'd survive it if I lost you."
"Me either," she replies, "And it scares me Jesse. It scares me so much."
"I know, me too," he admits.
"So what happens when it's time to go home?" she wonders.
"Well I have another year and half to go in my program," he replies, "And then after that all of the jobs will probably be in Los Angeles. Did your boss give you any idea of the timeframe with Emily's song?"
"We already started working on it," she answers. "Actually, you just heard us perform it," she adds.
"That's a great song," he pulls her closer, wrapping an arm around her shoulders as they walk. "Ok, so what happens after that? Can you see if maybe your boss could give you a recommendation for a place in Los Angeles instead? Do you want to stay at Residual Heat permanently?"
"Even if I did, it wouldn't be near you," she replies. "I can ask," she says finally, "And just see what my options are."
"Just make sure you're not giving up anything for me," he reminds her as he stops walking and cups her face in his hands. He kisses her then, and the kiss quickly heats up as they lose themselves in each other. She pulls away, remembering their surroundings and grins up at him.
"Oh believe me, I won't be giving anything up," she quips, raising her eyebrows suggestively and he laughs. "Plus, someone has to show Alexa that you belong to me."
"Oh really?" he chuckles, "I think it's rather obvious. Plus, I should probably be the insecure one with all those guys you always have asking for your number after every performance. You're hot, Beca. Do you know how many guys I've had to threaten over the years to stake my claim on you?"
"Dork," she teases, "Believe me, I'm all yours." Her voice drops as she says it, and he licks his lips as they hurry into his hotel room.
"Might as well get my money's worth," he jokes as they shed their clothes once more.
They never make it to the after party.
They have the next day together, and they spend it touring the city and seeing the sites before he boards a plane to fly back to school. And this time when they part, she knows it isn't forever. She returns to Residual Heat and tells her boss about her desire to move to Los Angeles. When he asks her why she wants to move she responds simply, "My life is there."
She and Emily complete work on Flashlight, and it becomes a hit for Residual Heat. It turns out her boss has some connections in Los Angeles, and sets her up to meet some people there. His only request is that she collaborates with him on her next project. As he puts it, she doesn't need to be in the office to do her job. All she needs is mixing equipment and talent.
After about two months, she's packing her car with all of her belongings and heading to Los Angeles. She texts Jesse to let him know she's on her way. His response is almost immediate.
Drive safely. I love you.
She smiles as she puts her car in gear and pulls away from the curb in the direction of her future and laughs as her phone chimes with another text from Jesse.
Take care of yourself.