It's Always Sunny in Naples
"The gang gets a new member"
"Why did you give the car to Abbachio? You know he'd never come to pick us up?"
"Abbachio had something come up. He said he wish he could come."
"He's probably drunk, and your phone call woke him up," Mista mumbled. Bruno glared at him and opened his mouth to probably start lecturing. "Okay, let's work on getting a cab I guess."
They walked past the pay phone in the airport and stepped outside to see a line of people wrapping around taxi pickup area. Bucciarati stopped for a second at the end of the line, but Mista walked angrily past him, muttering something about rather dying than waiting in a line with a bunch of fucking tourist. Bucciarati sighed and followed, looking for someone he could maybe convince to drive them home.
"Mista, we'll have to wait in line anyway. Let's not waste anymore time."
"I'm not waiting for in that long ass-"
"I could drive you two if you wanted."
They both turned around to see a donut haired blond boy approaching them. Mista left his mouth open for a second, taking a moment before he told the kid off to appreciate the pure strangeness of his hair.
"We don't need a ride from you. I bet you're one of Luca's dudes that hangs around here, over charges desperate tourist, steals their stuff."
"No, no, I would never work for Luca."
"But you're going to steal our stuff?"
"What's your name?"
"Bucciarati, ignore him. It's a scam."
"Giorno Giovanna."
"Why are you doing this? You look like you should be in school."
"I'm old enough to drive, and I need money for my apartment."
"You don't live with your parents?"
"No..." Bruno gave the kid the saddest look that kind of freaked him out, but Mista knew what was happening already. "So it might be a little more expensive to get a ride from me, but I can see you're from around here, so I'll-"
"Do you need a place to stay?"
"What?"
"Bucciarati, no. You're not bringing in another random kid to live with us. There's too many of us already. You're not the world's mom."
"This poor kid is living without his parents at an age where he should be going to school and has to drive people around at the airport just to make a living. I can't just leave him."
"Yes, you can. I don't want the whole city in our apartment."
"He wouldn't have to live with us. He could just work in the restaurant with the rest of us. It would be better work. I'd be able to make sure he was okay."
"What's wrong with you?"
"I actually care unlike the rest of you. I know he's just some dude we met at the airport, but I know a face in need when I see one. That's how I met you and the rest of us. I didn't know any of you well but took a chance and look at how great-"
"Nice speech, but you might wanna hurry up 'cause he's trying to run away."
Bruno looked over to see Giorno already in his car, shoving in the key as fast as possible, but this only made Bruno more determined. He grabbed onto Mista, called Sticky Fingers, and zipped themselves inside of the car.
"What the-"
"I understand what you overheard might have been strange, but I want to assure you that it wasn't meant to scare you. I'll leave you alone, but could you please drive me and Mista?" He spoke calmly, as if he didn't make ask a complete stranger to live with him not even a few minutes ago.
"What the fuck is that?" Bruno looked confused. "The thing that's sitting next to you and that got you into the car."
"You can see my stand?"
"If that's a stand, then yes."
"Do you have something similar, that nobody else can see, that does strange things?"
Gold experience appeared in the passenger seat next to Giorno. "Like this?"
Mista pulled at his gun and aimed it at the boy. "How did you get a stand? Who gave it to you?"
Giorno didn't flinch at the gun and instead moved closer to it, looking Mista straight in the eyes. "Nobody. It showed up on its own a few years ago."
Mista leaned over to Bruno with his gun still pointing at Giorno's head. "Is that even possible?"
"I've heard that it's rare, but stands don't always come from the arrow."
"What are the chances though? This dude doesn't seem too phased by most of this stuff. He could know who we are."
"Why would he show his stand then?"
"I don't know. To make us lower our guard?"
"He probably could've-"
"If you're going to have a full conversation could you not point your gun at me?"
Mista glance over at Bruno who nodded and then slowly lower his gun. They sat there in an awkward silence for a few moments, sweating, before Bruno began speaking. "This changes things. You don't seem to know what stands are or how to use them, you have little money, and you're what 16?"
"15."
"That's it. That age alone means you need help."
"I really don't."
"Listen to him."
"Would you like to come work at my restaurant? We'd pay you more than you make ripping off a few tourist."
Giorno sat in silence contemplating the offer. This dude was really weird, but he didn't seem creepy. Giorno doubted he could really make money at the restaurant, but he could learn more about stands and that might be his only opportunity.
"Will there be free pizza?"
"Lots."
"I'll do it."
Mista sat in the back of the car, blankly staring, horrified at his friend's mom skills and about the new dude's ability to be convinced so easily.
The next morning Bruno rounded up everyone to the center of the closed restaurant while Mista slinked off in the corner somewhere.
"Today someone new will be joining us. He's a stand user but doesn't know much about what they are really. Our meeting was somewhat strange yesterday, so he probably won't be too comfortable here for a while. Be nice."
"I already have enough idiots to watch over. Fire him."
"I agree with Abbachio," Fugo said.
"Fire Fugo while you're at it."
"What the hell dude? I thought we were friends."
"You're annoying and never get any work down."
"That's because I'm fixing all of Narancia's messes. He drops something every five minutes, so I have to follow him around catching food and plates and stop him from beating up the customers."
"Fire Narancia too then."
"Fugo if you just got me fired I'll-"
The door opened, shutting them up and in walked the new member. The glares from the gang examined him at the same time they tried to scare him off with only Bruno having a nice smile across his face. Their unwelcoming faces actually made Giorno feel better about all this. Good, he thought, I won't have to try and put on a happy front.
"Hi, I'm Giorno Giovanna."
"Your name is Giorno? Like buon giorno?"
"Yeah..."
"I'm not calling you that."
"Cool. I'll call you bitch then."
"Alright, fucker."
"Giorno, this is Abbachio." Bruno nervously tried to diffuse the tension. "That's Fugo, Narancia, and you remember Mista from yesterday."
"It would be kind of weird to call him that now that I think about it. We could call him Gio?" Mista said.
"That's kind of boring. I don't want to call him that either..." Narancia leaned his head against his hand in deep thought for a while. "Ah! What about GioGio?"
"I can work with that. I actually kind of like that."
"It's the beginning of his first and last names."
"That's kind of cool."
"I've been here for 2 minutes, and you've changed my name?"
"C'mon GioGio, you have to admit it is a better name." Bruno was surprised that Fugo was now agreeing with them. Mista swooped in from the corner and put his hand on Giorno's shoulder, making him groan slightly.
"GioGio, for the first few weeks you'll be doing 'Narancia Work.' You'll be taking out the trash, cleaning the bathroom, doing whatever jobs we don't want to do." Giorno stared blankly as Mista explained and contemplated leaving now.
"Sweet! I can finally become a waiter again."
"I'm afraid we can't let you do that, Narancia. Just being the busboy and janitor causes us enough damage, so you're going to focus on a new project this week. Also you can't read or write."
"What do you mean? I read magazines all the time, and Fugo says my writing is better than my math."
"That's how shitty your math is, not how good your writing is. Most things you write down aren't even in a human language. The only thing preventing me from killing you is some little part of my brain telling me that your writing is something so intelligent the rest of us can't possibly understand, but deep down, I know it's complete shit."
"What am I going to be doing for the next few weeks then?"
"Teaching GioGio to do Narancia Work." There was a moment of awkward silence before Bruno started to inch backwards towards the door.
"Okay, I'm going to trust that you all won't try to kill GioGio-"
"You too?"
"Sorry. It does have a nice ring to it... I have to go see Polpo. I'll open the restaurant on the way out. Don't do anything stupid."
As soon as Bucciarati turned around, the gang began to enclose Giorno, each making their own plan to mess with him. Abbachio planned on seriously harming him or making him disappear forever in a way that Bucciarati wouldn't suspect, but the rest planned something much more funny than anything. Giorno sighed and accepted that if he wanted to do what he set out to, he was going to have to accept his new life as 'GioGio'.