It's been months since the day Kylo Ren fought Finn and Rey only to lose. It had taken Finn what seemed like forever to heal from his wounds of the fight but eventually he managed to get back up on his feet. He still swears to this day it was mostly due to Poe and bb-8's help. This might have something to do with why he accepted Poe's offer to share a room with him so quickly but that's up for debate.
It's through the few months they've spent in such close quarters that Poe has noticed a few strange quirks of Finn's. Having been a former stormtrooper some of these things probably aren't actually that unusual however there is one in particular that not only catches Poe's attention but also worries him.
On more than one occasion Poe has caught Finn going into the bathroom just to change his shirt, or Poe having woken him up from a nightmare leaving Finn sweating. Poe tried to get Finn to take his shirt off to cool down but Finn vehemently refused. Then there was the instance where the cooling on base had gone out leaving it ridiculously hot inside. No one in their right mind would walk around wearing more clothes than necessary, or especially sleep in a t-shirt but Finn still did. And he sweated greatly for it.
After that was when Poe finally seemed to figure it out. He had tried to bring it up more than once but he was shot down every time.
Then there was the incident today. Poe and Rey had convinced Finn to come with them and the rest of the pilots to a small spring for a day of swimming. Rey had tried to get Finn to come in with them and when he refused (Poe is certain it's only because he was afraid of taking his shirt off), Rey had gotten an attitude with him and they had fought until Poe had separated them. He had tried to ask Finn what was wrong but in turn got yelled at before Finn had stormed off back to the base.
Much later on that same day, Poe and Finn are back in their room getting ready for bed much like they always do. The only difference is the silence that has fallen between them from the events earlier in the day.
Poe absolutely hates the silence and he can't take it. He doesn't want them to go to bed angry with each other and this needs to be said. Finn can't go missing out on the rest of his life just because some asshole decided to slice him open with a lightsaber. Finn had only just gotten the chance at a real life, and Poe will be damned as the same asshole who helped make it hell for so long will take away the second chance he's been given.
Finn gets up from his bed and rummages through his nightstand for a shirt to change into with the pair cotton pants he already has on. Jumping up from his own bed, Poe catches him by the arm just before he can go into the bathroom.
Rather than pulling away like Poe knows he wants to, Finn turns to face him. There's a fear in his eyes that almost makes Poe release his grip and get back in bed, but that fear is why he has to say something so he stays put. By the end of the night maybe Poe can help stomp that fear out.
The muscles in Finn's arm are tense as Poe slides his hand down it to grasp Finn's hand instead. "Finn, what's wrong?"
Finn won't meet his eyes. "Nothing." He replies with the shrug of his shoulders, trying, and failing, to come across as casual.
Poe sighs. "Finn look at me." With his free hand he taps Finn on the chin, and reluctantly he looks up to meet the shorter man's eyes. "If nothings wrong then what was that earlier? You snapped at Rey, and that's not like you." Finn bites his lip and shrugs. "Am I allowed to say what I think is wrong?" Poe asks gently.
Now it's Finn's turn to sigh. "Yeah I guess."
"I think you're afraid to take your shirt off in front of other people because you're worried about your scar for some reason." Poe knows he's right when Finn suddenly looks down and starts stuttering.
"I... No... I don't know where you... No... That's not..."
"Finn..." Poe says trying to stop the rambling. It doesn't work as Finn, still rambling, pulls his hand out Poe's and starts to back into the bathroom. Knowing that if they don't do this now they never will, Poe doesn't let him get away. He lets out a little louder "Finn!" This time and it stops him in his tracks.
Finn sighs once again and runs a hand through his short black hair. "Fine." He says, barely audible. "I hate it when people see that damn scar."
"Why?" Poe asks simply.
Now Finn looks at him visibly confused. "It's ugly."
Taking a step forward Poe cups Finn's face in his hands. "Finn, there's no part of you that's ugly."
Finn reaches up with his free hand to wrap it around Poe's wrist and leans into his touch. "If you say so."
"Well I say so." He can see in Finn's face that there's something he's not saying. "Is that all?"
Finn shakes his head. It's such a small movement Poe isn't sure whether it actually happened or if he just imagined it. "I'm weak." He whispers so dejectedly, and so ashamed. Poe can feel his heart break right there in his chest. As heartbreaking as the confession is, it also puts things in perspective for Poe and makes him realize what the real problem is here.
Taking his hands off Finn's face, Poe grasps his shoulders. "You are not weak, and that scar is not proof of that."
"He beat me Poe. I should have been stronger, better for Rey. I should have been able to protect her, ...and Han. I should have stopped him." Finn's head hangs in shame.
Gently Poe tries to shake some sense into him. "No, you shouldn't have." Finn looks up surprised. "You wanted to do those things. You wish you could have. That doesn't mean..." Poe pauses trying to figure out how to word it. "Saving everyone and being the hero isn't your responsibility Finn. And nobody... I repeat nobody thinks you're weak because Kylo Ren almost killed you. If I'm being honest, you did better against him than most people on this base could have. Better than I could have, that's for sure. And you did save Rey. She probably wouldn't be alive right now if it weren't for you."
Stepping forward, Finn wraps his arms around Poe's midsection, and leans forward to rest his head on the shorter man's shoulder. Poe's hands go to Finn's waist. "Thank you." Finn breathes.
Poe chuckles lightly. "For what, telling you the truth?"
Finn nods into his shoulder. Poe leans over and presses a gently kiss to the side of his head. If he could, Poe would never move again. He's starting to realize there's nowhere in the universe he'd rather be than in Finn's arms, not even his x-wing. From the very beginning their relationship had been very touchy-feely especially for just "friends", and right now Poe is grateful for it. It means Finn is comfortable with this, and will let Poe help him learn that that scar is really just a reminder of how strong he is.
Slowly, as slowly as he can possibly be, Poe's hands start to slide back onto Finn's back. As Finn's body starts to tense, Poe stops his movements and asks "Is this okay?"
"Yes." Finn whispers.
Nodding to himself, Poe continues his search for the scar. He knows he's hit it when Finn flinches in his arms. "You okay?" Poe asks once again, not wanting to make Finn uncomfortable in any way.
He takes a deep breath before replying "Yeah, I trust you."
Slowly, so as not to startle Finn, he starts rubbing his fingers up and down it. His other arm goes around Finn's waist and pulls him close so they're flush against one another.
Finn moves his head to rest it in the crook of Poe's neck, and lets himself get lost in the comforting embrace. They stay like that for a while before Poe pulls back to look at Finn's face. He looks much less afraid and ashamed.
"Can I..." He tugs at the fabric of Finn's shirt. "Can I take your shirt off?"
A smirk appears on Finn's face. "Poe Dameron, are you trying to get in my pants?"
Poe chuckles and shakes his head. "Maybe another night." He winks before bunching his hands into Finn's shirt and looks expectedly at the other man.
Turning serious once again, Finn nods. "Take it off." His voice is stronger now than it had been earlier and Poe likes to think that maybe he's gaining a little bit of confidence.
Poe grabs the hem of his shirt before slowly lifting it up, and pulling it over Finn's head. Now Finn looks a little more nervous as Poe takes in his chest. He's just so beautiful. Hard muscle rests under his dark skin, and his abs are well defined. It almost makes Poe a little self conscious. Any other time it would have gone straight to his groin, but tonight isn't about that.
He opens his mouth to ask if Finn is ready to turn around but he doesn't have too. The other man takes a deep breath before turning so his back is facing Poe.
The scar is a lighter color than the rest of Finn's back. The skin is slightly raised, and it goes diagonally from slightly left of the top of his spine to dipping down under the waistband of Finn's pants more on the right.
He reaches up to touch the very top of it before stopping. "Do you mind if I..." He leaves the question hanging and wait patiently for Finn's answer.
This time Finn pauses, unsure what he wants. Eventually though he decides he needs to conquer this. "Go ahead."
Very lightly, Poe rests his hand at the top of Finn's back. He gently runs his thumb over the very tip of the raised skin. Finn flinches a little. "It doesn't hurt right?" Poe asks just to be sure.
"No." Finn shakes his head.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Poe runs his index finger all the way down it until he reaches the top of Finn's pants before going back up the way he came.
He wraps his arms around Finn's waist and pulls him close. Finn's hand finds his own that's resting on Finn's dark skin, and tangles their fingers together.
Poe's mouth meets Finn's back. He presses, slow, loving, open-mouthed kisses down the scar. Finn's thumb is rubbing circles on the side of Poe's hand. Suddenly, he stops.
"Poe?" He asks.
"Hmm?" Poe hums into his back.
Finn fidgets a bit. "Why are you doing this?"
"Doing what?" He asks with a small smirk that Finn can't see. He presses another kiss to Finn's back.
"Taking the time to make sure I'm okay."
At this point Poe isn't sure how it isn't obvious. He might as well say it, there's no good reason not to at this point. "Because I love you." He murmurs into Finn's back before pulling away and resting his forehead against the top of the taller man's spine.
For as quietly as he said it, the words almost seem to echo around the room as if he had yelled into the deepest cavern you could find. And if Finn wanted him to, Poe would yell it, scream it, tell anyone that would listen until the day he dies.
"Really?" Finn sounds genuinely surprised.
"Of course." He replies. "How could I not?"
Finn is silent for a moment, but he starts rubbing Poe's hand again. "I love you too." He finally says.
He turns in Poe's grip and places a hand on the older man's face, his thumb runs gently through the stubble there.
Neither of them are quite sure who initiates it, or if they just meet somewhere in the middle, but somehow their meet each other's in a soft embrace. Shortly after, Finn pulls away to yawn.
Poe chuckles. "Maybe we should go to bed."
"Yeah I think you're right." Finn agrees. With another short peck to the lips, he pulls away and tries to walk over to his own bed. It doesn't work though as Poe grabs his hand at the last minute and drags him over to the other bunk.
"Did you really think you were getting away from me that easily?" Poe asks, grinning as he lays down on the far side of the small bed, motioning for Finn to take the remaining empty space.
Finn laughs. "I guess not." He crawls in next to the other man and lies with his head resting on Poe's chest.
Poe reaches over to flick off the lights before pulling the blanket up to their waists. After a few minutes of silence he thinks Finn has fallen asleep but then he mutters "You're the old one, aren't you supposed to be wearing me out, not the other way around?"
Poe laughs. "Hey, I'm not that old." When the only thing he gets in response is Finn's deep breathing, he closes his eyes and finally lets sleep overtake his body.
