This fanfic is inspired by the song "Kagerou Days". Some Kaworu/Shinji

"Help me, somebody help me!"

A crowd was gathered and in it stood that person with that mouth - only thin and straight. The lights are flashing green, the tinny music shrilling away.

His hand, limp in blood. Scarlet splattered in white hair. Eyes that were closed. He was shaking and shaking and being shaken but there was nothing, there was no movement. Drops of water on the face even without rain.

"K-Kaworu-k-kun..."

August 15th, 12:00p.m

Holidays. Shinji closed his phone. "Time to go." he smiled.

August 15th, 12:30p.m

It was something he suddenly realized - how pleasant the weather was. The sun was bright without glaring and the sky azure, pristine, with no clouds to obscure it. There was a light, gentle breeze, taking his hair with it and letting it go. Crickets somewhere were chirping.

Those days where everything was thrown into sharp detail, where Shinji felt, sitting idly on a swing, that he could just stand anywhere and stare, and he would be content looking at the intense colours of the world.

He missed that kind of feeling.

"Shinji-kun?"

He turned, and on his right was Kaworu on the other swing, serene as though he had been perched there for ever. Shinji started, but calmed down quickly. It was only Kaworu.

"A-Ah, Kaworu-kun, I didn't see you there."

His presence always had a curious calming effect. A slight smile graced Kaworu's lips. "A beautiful day, is it not?" The cat - now Shinji realized that he had a black tabby in his arms, curled up - opened its mouth in a little miaow and regarded Shinji with its bluish-green eyes, before turning away. Seeing Shinji's expectant gaze on the cat, Kaworu chuckled.

"I picked her up when I was walking here." He gestured casually back to the park behind them. "Just now, when I over there."

"I see."

Kaworu's smile grew into something Shinji couldn't quite tell. "Shinji-kun, do you think cats like summer?"

Shinji blinked. Did cats have a preference over the weather, he wondered? He did know that cats didn't like rain, but who did? He most commonly saw them at night, skulking around at high places, or when he was walking to school, strays prowling around their usual neighbourhood territory. Then again, those were the times when he was actually out. He didn't know much about cats.

"Why would you ask that, Kaworu?"

It could also be one of Kaworu's questions. Kaworu liked cats.

"I have read one of the old books before the Second Impact, when I was still in my old school." Kaworu began. "They mentioned something about winter, do you know what that is, Shinji-kun?"

"Winter?" Shinji knew what that was. It was also in his elementary school textbooks, describing pre-Second Impact climatic patterns. It didn't exist anymore, of course. "They taught us about winter too, in school...it's when it gets really cold and melting ice...I mean, it was called snow, right? The snow falls from the sky, and the winter causes all the trees to lose their leaves...They told us that it would usually start in about in November."

Trees without leaves. Shinji had seen one before, bare and looking strangely small without the vegetation. It looked...sad. To imagine that during winter, all the trees would look like that. Winter sounded really depressing. Did Kaworu feel that cats would prefer winter? But it would be so cold and uncomfortable...

Shinji registered Kaworu's eyes on him, waiting. "O-Of course, we don't have winter now, so...I don't know what it feels like." He looked down to gaze on his feet, cheeks burning in embarassment. Why was it whenever he tried to talk to anyone these awkward moments would occur?

Thankfully, Kaworu did not notice. "Winter sounds nice." Shinji stared at him, and Kaworu returned it. "Cold, but all the animals and plants are hibernating, waiting to be refreshed in spring, are they not?" He seemed to be answering Shinji's' unsaid questions, and his lips came apart. "The renewal of life. What do you think, Shinji-kun?"

What did he think? Shinji looked away. Kaworu liked winter. If he knew that Shinji did not like it, how would he feel? Would he be unhappy with him? "I would prefer winter over this kind of summer weather." Kaworu stated simply, saving Shinji from his pondering. He stroked the cat in his arms, who purred contentedly and closed its large eyes.

Shinji's mind went into overdrive again and decided, that with Kaworu's paper-white hair and pale skin, winter would suit him, since everything was similarly white. And even in the midst of all that white, him, a lone figure, would turn, and his crimson eyes, would make him stand out immediately, a striking contrast between two colours.

miaow

A black shape sprung out. "Ah-" Shinji looked up to see the black cat leap out of Kaworu's arms and dart away, skittering out of the park, out into the pavement, out into the road.

He was standing. "The cat could get hit!" Kaworu was saying with a hint of alarm in his normally placid tone. The traffic lights were trilling and blinking green. He was leaving, following the cat, his hair fluttering out as he ran.

There was no sign of vehicles on the road. Shinji got off the swing. "Kaworu-kun!"

As the cat stopped in the middle of white painted lines, Kaworu stooped down to pick it up, the cat now thrashing in his arms and trying to wrench free. Gripping it tightly in his arms, he turned and grinned at Shinji, and began to run back. The lights were still green, and as Kaworu took another step-

Shinji grinned back in response-

-they turned red.

A truck appearing from nowhere, the screech of brakes, tires trundling madly down asphalt. Kaworu- Shinji lunged out, hand outstretched, feet propelling off. Kaworu looked to his left, saw the truck in front of him, horn blaring, eyes widened-

"Kaworu!"

His hand opened in a loss of control and the cat jumped away. A sickening slam and splatter of scarlet. Someone was screaming - Shinji realized it was him, screaming out of his mouth stretched wide.

Blood dripped off the truck sprayed in red. Blood was on his shirt, white and red, blood painting the road, smearing the white painted lines. Blood everywhere.

So much blood. The metallic smell assaulted his senses and Shinji hunched over, hand on his mouth, choking and trying to resist the nauseating lump churning in his stomach. Kaworu was lying on the road, twisted, hands and limbs splayed, bleeding that did not cease. The blood was pooling underneath him, blood that coloured his ivory fingers, grasping nothing as they trembled, his alabaster hair bedaubed in crimson. And his eyes, blood red, scrunched in pain, fighting the closing.

"K-Kaworu-" Kaworu shuddered as Shinji ran over to hold him, taking in breaths that were increasingly shallow and scratchy. Tears were pooling in Shinji's eyes and falling with abandon. Kaworu had been hit, an accident, Kaworu was going to- This could not be happening, why was it happening? "K-Kaworu-kun!" He was shaking Kaworu, hard, and crying.

"S-Shin...ji..." His fingers brushed onto the damp shirt, agonizingly slow and slowing down. Kaworu was getting cold, the eyes fading, his breaths slowing. He was dimming away.

"Kaworu- stay with me-!"

It reminded him of a winter's day, but all red.

There was no one a few moments ago but people were gathering, forming a crowd. Someone stood in the crowd, black-haired and clad in black, narrowed bluish-green eyes, mouth thin. Hushed murmurs echoed all around, fingers jabbing away at keys. "Help me!" Frenzied, Shinji looked up, screaming at them, holding Kaworu in his arms. Why weren't they doing anything? "Somebody help me!"

The lights were flashing green, the tinny music shrilling away. The crickets were silent.

"Kaworu!" He could not be...He couldn't be...no...not like mother...

His hand was limp in blood. Scarlet splattered in white hair. Eyes that were closed. He was shaking and shaking and being shaken but there was nothing, there was no movement. Drops of water fell and splashed on the puddle.

This is all real

"Kaworu!"

tick

Shinji's eyes burst open. Day, shining through the curtains, it was soft and warm, he was on his bed, his legs still wrapped up in the blanket.

He blinked.

What time was it?

Getting up, he noticed his phone in his hands and the clock to the right. Past twelve, and the sun was shining.

August 14th. He was going to meet Kaworu.

He could hear the crickets somewhere.

Outside was a incredibly pleasant day, the skies all blue and clear, with a breeze that caressed his hair. He was sitting at the swing, idling, doing nothing.

"Shinji-kun?"

To his right was Kaworu on the other swing, smiling, eyes open, red. A black cat with bluish-green eyes in his hands.

"It is a beautiful day, is it not?" He said.

He stared at Kaworu, remembering him in red, splattered with blood. The truck that was sprayed with scarlet. Lying on the road, contorted horribly, gasping for air. Losing warmth. It was darkening.

Was it a dream?

"Are you all right, Shinji-kun?" Kaworu asked, concerned.

Kaworu was there. Warm, with heat, alive. Breathing steadily. Shinji, involuntarily, could feel his mouth opening. "You know, Kaworu-kun, it's a little strange."

Kaworu's smile widened, eyes soft. "What is it, Shinji-kun?"

"Last night, in my dream, we were at this exact same place."

"Were we?"

What if it was real? A warning?

Shinji began to move. His legs were pushing him up, off the swing, to stand, and his arm reached out to grab Kaworu's shoulder. Kaworu was looking at him, inquisitive and slightly puzzled at Shinji's narrowed eyes.

"Kaworu, let's go home."

He would not let Kaworu die.

"If you wish." Kaworu obliged, smiling his same gentle smile. He released the cat and stood up. The cat leapt off and prowled behind them, walking in the same direction.

The traffic light was green when they crossed, Shinji still holding onto Kaworu. There were no vehicles in that empty road. They made it to the other side, safely in the shadows of the towering buildings. Shinji released the breath he had been holding. Kaworu would be safe now. He turned to look at Kaworu, to reassure himself that he was alive and that all was well.

Where Shinji could not see, Kaworu narrowed his eyes.

Slowing down, Kaworu went on ahead, ignoring his gaze. Then they were surrounded, full of talking, a disturbing crreeaaak sounding from up above. Shinji glanced around to see people standing around, some cowering, pointing up, mouths opened.

He turned to see Kaworu rush forward -why? then a distant snap sounded. A scream, someone screaming in terror, the rushing wind of something dropping far too quickly, then a squelch-

"Kaworu!"

Iron poles, from construction above the building fell, straight down. One pierced Kaworu, who was moving, who looked up too late. The pole impaled him with his cry of pain, others fell on him and pinned him to the ground. Blood splattered, blood that got on Shinji's hands, his eyes widening and stared. There was so much blood, blood that covered the metal poles covering protuding from Kaworu, lying on the pavement bleeding.

No - Not again-

His hands were reaching out, outstretched, and he was shaking, collapsed to Kaworu beside him. His limbs were limp like a broken doll, crushed under the weight. Blood stained his white shirt, his white hair covering his eyes. Blood was painting his fingers as he clutched Kaworu, tears leaving splashes on his face. Again, hit, hit by a truck, stabbed by a pole. He was still. The blood oozed out slowly, creeping across the cement. Kaworu, motionless, covered in blood, hurt, dead.

Shinji, joining the people around him, screamed.

Through his tears, he saw him again, bluish-green eyes fixed on Shinji, mouth moving.

This is the real thing.

And he realized Kaworu was smiling.

Part 2 coming up soon!