Author's Note: Well, here we are again; a sequel to The Visitors has been gnawing at me since I finished the last installment. I figured I may as well give in to the feeling. This segment of The Visitors is set during the holiday season (I know, a holiday story for a Halloween entry? But in all truth, the previous one was set late November/early December so…) It's also set a year from the current chapters of Redemption (current Redemption is in November at the moment; so this story is early December of the following year). I am also still working on Reflections and Redemption; I wrote this chapter and another one in advance. I hope you all enjoy this second journey into this little part of Johanna's universe!
Chapter 1- A Feeling
Johanna Beckett stood in her kitchen feeling like a weight was settling on her shoulders as she listened to the television on the counter while she washed dishes. Commercial after commercial announced extended Black Friday sale prices for the first week of December and she cringed inside. Usually extended sale prices made her giddy…usually it had her itching to head out on a shopping spree, no matter the time of year…and yet she was utterly uninspired. She'd been dreading the Christmas season since the end of the last holiday season and now it was upon them again…and she didn't want any part of it. The first Christmas of being reunited with her family had been a complete and utter disaster and she had no desire for a repeat; especially since she had been made acutely aware of Jim and Kate's true feelings on the topic of Christmas. The feeling that wrapped around her now reminded her of the feeling she had always carried in Wyoming when the holiday season set in…she just wanted to shun it; to run and hide from it until it was over; forget it existed. She didn't want holiday music or decorations; she didn't feel a need to shop for personalized gifts. She just didn't want any part of it at all. All of her good Christmases were behind her…and there were painful memories of all the ones she had spent alone…and the disaster of the year before dogging her heels. No; she didn't want any part of it; holiday hoopla was no longer a part of her life. She had washed her hands of all of it and would be more than happy to leave it in the past.
As the commercials faded and one of television's most popular courtroom shows came back on; she decided that she wasn't going to do it this year; she wasn't going to pretend to assuage anyone's feelings; she wasn't making any half hearted efforts. Her husband had only gone along with her desire to celebrate last year to humor her; his true feelings only being revealed after she and Kate had their tiff about the whole thing. She wouldn't dare even entertain the notion of any semblance of a holiday with her daughter. That was never going to happen; she accepted that and respected it. Johanna sighed as she once again resigned herself to that acceptance. Oh well; she wasn't going to bother this year; she had gone all out last year and it had gotten her nothing but heartache. This year they could embark on a new tradition; pretending it was like any other day as she always did in Wyoming while locked in her house with the curtains drawn and the phone off…or they could take up Jim's tradition and head up to the cabin. That's what he would've preferred the year before and if that's what would make him happy then she'd be happy to go. In fact the idea of shunning the city and being tucked away in the mountains appealed to her greatly. The quietness of their mountain home and the fresh, yet cold and crisp air would be refreshing. Perhaps she wouldn't feel so suffocated by the month if they spent part of it up their where things seemed so wide open and still; so free from drama and all the things she wanted to ignore. The cabin was definitely a good idea.
Deciding there was no better time than the present to make their holiday plans; Johanna rinsed the last plate and put it in the drainer and then grabbed the towel to start drying them. "When will we be leaving for the cabin?" she asked.
Jim glanced at her from over the newspaper as he sat at the table. "I wasn't aware that we had plans to go."
"For Christmas," she replied. "Remember, we said we'd stick to new traditions and yours is going to the cabin for the holiday so I was wondering when we'd be leaving."
"If you want to get specific about what you said last year, you said Katie could go where she wanted, I could go to the cabin and you'd be staying home."
"Alright," Johanna stated, ignoring the sting of the remark. "When will you be leaving and when will you be back?"
"Johanna, don't be ridiculous," he retorted. "I'm not going anywhere without you."
She sighed. "Then my original question still stands; when are we leaving? Are we going on the 23rd or should we head out on the 22nd and avoid some of the traffic? We could even go the week before if you want; that is if your work is wrapped up by then for the holidays. To tell you the truth, I wouldn't mind at all if we left the week before and came back after the New Year."
"We're not going anywhere," Jim told her. "We're staying home where we belong for Christmas."
His wife blew out a breath. "I'd rather go to the cabin."
"No."
"Why not? It's what you wanted. You even said last year that you would've preferred it!"
"That was last year; this is this year."
"Jim; please; let's just get out of town and away from this holiday nonsense. You like low key holidays and I'm completely over holidays so let's just go up to the cabin and have a little vacation, okay?"
"No," he replied as he continued to read his paper.
"Give me one good reason," she stated tersely.
"Because I said so."
Johanna glared at him. "Fine; I'll go by myself."
"That's a deviation from the original plan but call me when you get there," he quipped.
A sheen of tears appeared in her eyes and she glanced away as she picked up another dish to dry. Maybe she should go by herself and wait out this holiday like a hermit…she had plenty of experience at it; it would be like being back in Wyoming and no one would have to worry about any expectations. "I will," she murmured. "I'll leave the 23rd and I'll come back the 27th…or 28th; whichever I feel like and weather depending. I'll make sure the groceries are stocked for you before I go."
Jim caught her eye. "You can't be serious. You don't really think there's a chance in hell that I'm letting you walk out of here to drive up to the cabin to spend Christmas alone, do you?"
"Then come with me," Johanna said; desperation coloring her tone. "I just can't do it again this year, Jim. Last Christmas is nothing but terrible memories and if we stay in the city I'll just keep thinking about them and I don't want to. I just want this holiday to be over and done with."
"Going away isn't going to make it leave any faster. It's just a form of hiding, isn't it?"
"No; it's me wanting us to have a stress free holiday this year since last year was a disaster but I see you're in the mood to be a jackass so I'll just drop the line of conversation and we can forget I mentioned anything. I'll be fine; don't worry about it."
"I know you will be," he said gently. "Last year is over; this one will be better, we're all more settled now. It'll be fine, Jo. I'm not saying you have to go through with any big plans, but we'll stay home and have a nice holiday. We do have family who might want to see us."
"Like who?" she asked, tossing the dish towel on the counter. "Andrew and Gabby are going to be in Maine so Gabby can see her grandmother. Valerie and Frankie are going to be in Florida on that family Christmas vacation they planned. Samantha will be with Lindsey and John in Virginia. Jeff and Maggie are so terrified of the thought of even attempting a family Christmas that they've already booked their plane tickets to Cancun so they can get the hell out of Dodge. I say we borrow a page from their playbook and hit the road too…hell, I'm even willing to go to Cancun too if you want; it'll be nice and warm there."
"I'm not going to Cancun," Jim replied. "And you forgot someone on your relative list."
"Who? Michael isn't going to come around here; they still treat me like I have the plague."
"I meant our daughter," he stated. "You remember her; you two were okay with each other a few weeks ago and I noticed that around her birthday you started being distant with her."
Johanna smiled. "Honey, she's not coming. She's engaged, she has her fiancé, a future step-daughter and mother-in-law that she will be spending the holidays with; which is how it should be. Face it, it's just you and me, so we may as well go have a romantic getaway."
"Oh, so now it's a romantic getaway?" he asked.
"How could it be anything else?" she replied. "It is you and me after all…you play your cards right and decide on a tropical vacation and you'll get the bonus of me spending the holiday in a bathing suit," she said with an enticing smile.
"The sight of you in a bathing suit is always tempting, sweetheart; but I don't think we should infringe on Jeff and Maggie's plans by showing up in Cancun."
She shrugged. "There are plenty of other tropical destinations…we could go to Hawaii. I love Hawaii."
"We already went to Hawaii this year," Jim remarked as he turned the page of his newspaper.
"Are people only allowed to visit Hawaii once a year?" she asked. "I didn't realize there was a restriction."
"There's not; I just don't want to go to Hawaii again."
"Why not? I thought we had fun."
"We did have fun," he replied with a smile. "It was wonderful; I enjoyed it a great deal and I have no problem taking you back there…but not for Christmas. I'll take you for your birthday if you really want to go back that badly."
She huffed in annoyance. "That's so far away."
Jim chuckled. "Really? I was under the impression that February was only two months away; give or take a few days."
Johanna sighed. "Well then you pick a place."
"I already have; it's called home. I'm not going anywhere for the holidays, Johanna."
"So it doesn't matter what I want?"
"We did what you wanted last year."
She turned back to the sink. "I hate this holiday," she muttered.
"You'll feel better once you start shopping."
"I'm not doing any damn shopping with the exception of you. I'll get the nieces and nephews gift cards and I'll do the same for Frankie and Valerie. You can handle anyone in your family that I don't deal with."
"I thought you said gift cards were cold and impersonal," Jim replied.
Johanna nodded. "That's the look I'm going for this season; cold and impersonal. Here's your card, go buy your own gift because I am done."
"What about Katie?"
"She didn't want the gifts I bought for her last year and they got returned," she replied, ignoring the sting that still lingered from the memory of their fight. "I'm not going to bother this year. She doesn't like gifts from me; that's why I sent her flowers on her birthday; I didn't want to ruin her day with an unwanted present. I'm not going through it again with her for Christmas and I don't want her showing up here with anything with my name on it either and I mean it, so you better pass that along and make it clear. If you want to get her something for Christmas; by all means, please do; just leave my name off of it…I don't want her to think I'm backtracking on our deal."
Jim sighed. "I told you last year to just get her gift cards; you wouldn't listen."
"Excuse me for trying to personalize gifts. I learned my lesson; that's what everyone else is getting this year; except you…and I can shop for you online so technically; my shopping can be done in a matter of minutes."
"Jo; you're overwhelming me with your enthusiasm."
"I don't have any damn enthusiasm," she exclaimed; "That's what I'm trying to get through to you. I'm not doing this again. I'm not shopping for gifts for everyone; I'm not decorating, I'm not baking. I'm not planning a big holiday dinner. I'm just not going to do it. It's not my thing anymore; I'm done. Our child is grown up and pretty much has a family of her own; she doesn't need me to provide her with a holiday. You made it clear last year that you didn't want anything that I did; that you just humored me until Katie laid it all out nice and clear. I'm not going through that again this year…all it did was cause problems between us. We didn't have a good Christmas and New Year's was even worse because…," she trailed off.
"Because we fought and you got pissed off enough to start showing everyone what you're made of," Jim stated. "I didn't like that we were having issues back then…but I think it was a good thing in the long run…I think it did you good."
"Didn't seem like it at the time," she replied.
He got up from his chair and crossed the room to stand near her. "Listen; I know it was bad last year…you started to make some good memories and then Katie and I ruined that for you; but that doesn't mean we need to run away this year. We're going to stay home; if you don't want to do anything for the holiday, you don't have to; but we're not going anywhere."
Johanna sighed and decided to play the only card she had left. "If you really loved me…"
"I do," Jim interrupted; "I love you madly; and we're still not going anywhere. If you want to go somewhere that badly; you'll be going alone…and then we'll be fighting again for the New Year and I don't think you want that."
That was true, Johanna thought to herself; she didn't want to be embroiled in marital discord for the New Year. "Alright, we'll stay home…but I'm serious; I'm not doing this holiday stuff. Absolutely none of it."
"Fine," he replied; figuring she'd change her mind later on; not that he was overly concerned if she didn't. He didn't really mind if she didn't want to go through all the usual holiday hoopla. A low key affair was fine with him.
"I'm serious."
"I believe you," he said as he brushed a kiss against her cheek; his phone suddenly blaring music. "Uh oh," he remarked; "That hasn't happened in awhile."
"Hello, Sarah," Johanna stated. "Welcome home."
"Do you see her?" Jim asked as he looked around the room.
"No, but clearly she's around."
"Maybe she's not happy with your holiday plans," he jested as he grabbed his phone from the table and silenced it.
"Or she wants to visit for the holidays," she replied.
"Well it's always nice to have family drop by for the holidays," he quipped. "Especially a guest who doesn't make a mess…unless she's mad at us."
Johanna conjured up a smile but she felt an odd sense of trepidation slide down her spine. She was used to Sarah McKenzie making her presence known from time to time; she was even used to her popping in to visit once in awhile. But for some reason she couldn't help but wonder if her husband's comment held some merit. Did Sarah have an opinion about her holiday plans or was she just checking in and letting them know she was still around?
A flash at the corner of her eye had her jerking her head in the direction of the doorway; the shimmering being of her grandmother stood there; her brow raised as her green eyes locked upon hers. Johanna's throat went dry, her lips parting as if to say something but as quickly as Sarah appeared, she was gone; the doorway empty once more, leaving Johanna to wonder if she had really seen her at all; if perhaps she had conjured up the image because Sarah was on her mind. She needed to stop thinking about the mischief making spirit that liked to pop in on occasion. It would just drive her crazy and she didn't need that.
She tried to push away the troubling thought of her ghostly grandmother having some opinion to share but a tiny knot formed in her stomach; a far more worrying thought pushing to the front of her mind. What if she did have an opinion? So far the only ghost to pop in on her every so often had been Sarah…but if Sarah had a point she wanted to drive home; would she bring friends to help her cause? That wasn't an overly pleasant thought. It wasn't what she wanted for Christmas…and there was no way to stop it if it was coming; at least she didn't think so; but she'd try. She'd just have to convince Sarah to go ahead and speak her piece if she had one and then politely tell her to mind her own business.
A glass she had finished drying and had set on the counter suddenly tipped over and rolled off, crashing to the floor and breaking. That wasn't a good sign, Johanna thought to herself as she looked at the broken pieces of glass on the floor.
"Are you having problems over there?" Jim asked from his seat at the table.
"Yeah," she replied. "I'm thinking we need to switch to plastic cups…it might cut down on having to buy new glasses every time this counter mysteriously rolls one onto the floor.
"Is it possible that you've ticked off your grandmother again?"
"Honey, when it comes to me, it's always possible that I've ticked someone off. Hopefully she's just being her usual mischief making self."
"She needs to take it easy on the glasses; this isn't the first time she's broken one."
"Yeah, I'll see if I can ask her to find a new trick," Johanna said as she carefully stepped around the broken glass to go get the broom. She was going to have to have a word with Sarah as soon as possible…but she was dreading it.