Their Willow

Disclaimer: I don't own W.I.T.C.H. or any of the characters.

Time Period: This piece is set not too long after the episode "S is for Self".

Author's Note: This fanfiction is written from Will's point of view. This isn't because I don't care about Matt's emotions during the aftermath of "S is for Self". I do. I really do. (He's just as important. After all, he was the one who was possessed, wasn't he?) I care about the feelings of both characters. My inspiration for this story stemmed from a conversation that I had with Sweetbriar back in the fall. We were discussing how Will must have felt after such a traumatic experience. Our insights supplied me with the idea for this oneshot. Please keep in mind that I will DEFINITELY write a oneshot that's centered on Matt's thoughts and feelings as well. I love these two equally. x333

This is also a late birthday fic for Sweetbriar. When I generated the idea for this piece I didn't think it would become a birthday present, but Sweetbriar's birthday was on the twentieth, and as soon as I began working on "Their Willow", it struck me that this would make a great gift for her, especially since she's wanted to read this oneshot for so long. I'm really, really, sorry that I didn't post this sooner, Sweetbriar. I wanted this piece to be as polished as possible, so that's my (hopefully valid) excuse. You're a fantastic friend, I enjoy our thought provoking conversations so much, and I really appreciate your ability to help me see multiple sides of an argument or a topic. I hope you had a wonderful day because you deserve it! Love you, girl! :D x3333

Will was nestled next to Matt under their favorite willow tree in Sheffield's expansive courtyard. A frigid breeze blew over her, making her shiver. She rubbed her arms with her hands in order to warm herself. Her white long-sleeved shirt wasn't providing her with the proper insulation. If she had known that this unusual cold would pierce the warm autumn weather she would've brought a sweater with her to the battle of the bands that evening.

"Cold?" Matt asked. The sound of his voice almost made her jump.

It was strange to hear Matt's voice and know that he was actually talking to her after weeks of speaking to Shagon in disguise. Will had had to program herself to believe that it wasn't Matt who was conversing with her--even though the villain was occupying her boyfriend's body. Shagon looked like Matt on the outside, but he wasn't him. This was what scared her the most at first, but she wasn't willing to admit that to anybody.

Having to reprogram her mind for the second time in a three week span seemed odd and slightly overwhelming. Matt's tone had been as casual and benign as ever when he spoke to her. It lacked the malevolence and crudeness that Shagon's voice had, but the shock of her beau's return was still fresh in her mind.

"Wanna sit on my lap? It'll help you warm up," Matt offered.

"Sure."

Will sat down on his outstretched legs, folding her hands at the nape of his neck. She felt the all too familiar warmth encompass her when he arced his arms around her middle, clutching her to him. The sensation of his warm body pressed flush to hers and the scent of his cologne (one that was indescribable but familiar) lulled her. She couldn't believe that she had lacked his touch, his affection for weeks. To have it now felt so comforting, so right.

Will rested her head on his shoulder, letting the happiness course through her. She felt like it might make her cry for the second time that evening. She embraced him for a few moments and then looked into his eyes.

"I missed this," she said.

"I did, too. I missed you."

"So did I. I was so worried about you. Worried that..." Will winced. She was finding it hard to reflect on the recent events. The memory of Shagon taunting her on the topic of Matt's whereabouts with venom in his eyes and steel in his voice made her entire body tense. She took a short breath and collected her composure before finishing her thought. "Shagon had hurt you." This was said in a voice that was only audible enough for she and Matt to hear. "What happened?"

Will wasn't entirely sure that she was ready for this conversation, but she craved the knowledge in spite of her hesitancy. And although the skittish expression on Matt's face made her feel like shying away even more, she recognized a burgeoning sense of urgency. She needed to know what happened to Matt. She needed to know so she and Matt could begin to move away from the darkness that had formed over their relationship.

"Now that's a story." Matt laughed a dry laugh. Will assumed he was doing this to make the challenging process easier on himself. His humor, she guessed, was a mask for his true feelings. "Nerissa turned me into her, uh," he paused, seeming to put careful thought into his answer, "mind monkey as Irma called it." Now it was Matt's turn to tense into her. Will rubbed the back of his neck in gentle up and down motions.

"How?" she asked, feeling confused.

"Remember how Shagon fed on hate?"

If his body had been tense against hers before, now it was completely rigid. She could feel the stiffness in his neck and midsection. She ran her fingers through his hair, hoping it would soothe him. "Yeah."

"That's how. She made me feel hate."

Unwanted images of Nerissa torturing Matt until she provoked contempt flooded Will's mind. Will found herself shuddering like a frail, frightened bird. She was once again confronted with the temptation to cry, but she bit the inside of her cheek and willed the heaviness in her eyes to go away. It did. "That must've been horrible."

"It wasn't exactly a cake walk," Matt remarked, using one of Will's favorite expressions. He must have noticed her shaking because he whispered to her, "Geez, Will. You're shaking like a leaf. Still cold?"

"No," she murmured without shame. Normally she wouldn't have been this open, but she was in Matt's arms. She was safe.

"Aw." His hold tightened on her.

She focused on the feel of his body heat and the comforting thought that it was all over now. Her body steadied. She remembered something that Matt had mentioned earlier, something that, now that she considered it, perplexed her. "How did you know that Irma called you--or uh, Shagon, Nerissa's mind monkey?"

"Let's just say that old Shaggy had a few lapses of control." Matt's muscles loosened beneath her as he said this.

One of Will's eyebrows dipped. She was about to say, "Huh?" but then began to fit the puzzle pieces together. If Shagon hadn't always possessed control over Matt's mind, then he and Matt had fought for control. Matt must have-- "Were you able to..." she shied away from supplying her theory because it was impossible. It made no rational sense. But she wanted to know. "Watch us?"

Matt nodded wordlessly.

That was when Will's mind went into overdrive. If there had been times when Matt was truly himself, what if she had attacked or injured him in that state? For all she knew, he could have been maintaining an act so as not to blow Shagon's intricately constructed cover during those occasions.

The idea horrified and consumed her. It caused a painful knot to form in her abdomen. The tears that she had held back with such care and intention earlier poured from her eyes. She cast aside her pride, not caring how the action made her appear.

"What – What's wrong?" Matt inquired, his eyes wide. He looked panicked, as if he feared that he was the source of her outburst. "Did I do something?"

She shook her head, alleviating his concern.

"Please tell me," he begged, extending a hand and brushing an errant tear from her cheek.

She took a few deep breaths and sought solace in his eyes. "I didn't..." Will began, pushing back the violent memories that were attempting to penetrate her mind. She inhaled again, feeling calmer. "I never hurt you, did I?"

A look of understanding came onto Matt's face. "No. Don't worry about that. You didn't touch me."

"What about Shagon?"

He chuckled, and the sound was tainted with a trace of darkness. "That's another story."

Will wanted to echo his laugh, to find humor in the situation like he was, but she couldn't. Instead, she wiped away the last of her tears with her sleeve and put her hand on top of Matt's, holding it in place on her cheek. That was when she noticed that the sleeve of his hoodie had slipped down a little, exposing a cluster of large, purple bruises on his tanned arm. She gasped and her mouth fell open.

Then, in a series of hasty motions, Will grabbed Matt's left arm, extracted it from her waist, and pushed the sleeve down. She was met with the same nausea inducing sight. Matt caught her eye when she gazed at him, and gave her a somber look. He didn't attempt to calm her down or reassure her that he was all right. He just offered her the same glum expression.

Tears began to blur Will's vision again. She made no effort to stop them. She needed to mourn over her boyfriend's hurt. Things always had to get worse before they got better, as her mother said.

Will felt Matt's hand inching upward, moving to caress away her sorrow, as if a single gesture could remedy their suffering. As thoughtful as his gesture was, she knew it wouldn't accomplish that feat. It couldn't. They both needed the gift and the curse of time to recover from this ordeal.

Without thinking, she lifted his arm to her lips and showered his injured skin with light kisses. Will knew the action wouldn't make the bruises fade, and it wouldn't compensate for what Shagon had done to Matt, but it would provide him with a sense of support at the very least.

When she finished she lowered his arm and peered at him, still crying, and still feeling no shame. As she looked at him another wave of emotion engulfed her. Will eased her arms around Matt and buried her head in his chest, sobbing and pouring her pain into his hoodie. She released her pent up agony, which was a combination of heart-wrenching emotions: guilt for hurting someone who had been a part of the boy--no, man, that she loved, affliction for everything she and Matt had endured, and a gnawing worry over Matt's well being.

All the while Matt held her in a vice-like grip, stroking her back and relieving her frayed nerves in silence. After what seemed to be the elapse of thirty minutes, her tears halted. Will raised her head and looked at Matt full in the face. She was surprised when he smiled at her, something that seemed unfitting in the midst of such sorrow.

"Glad to see that my beautiful girlfriend has stopped crying." His hand skimmed over the fabric of her lavender skirt. "Has anyone told you how pretty you look tonight?"

A blush heated Will's cheeks. She was glad that Matt wouldn't be able to tell it was there--her face always reddened after crying. When she was a child, Will thought it made her resemble an overripe tomato. It was one of the many factors that helped her avoid the display of weakness. "No. You're the first," she answered. "Do you like my outfit or something?"

"Yeah. It looks great. You should wear clothes like that more often."

"Maybe I will." She returned his smile with a mischievous one of her own. It was the first time she had smiled in the past forty five minutes.

The desire to be close to Matt overtook Will again, and she cuddled into his chest, becoming immersed in private reflection.

They had already been through so much together, and although she knew this situation had permanently scarred them, and that they would never be the same, she didn't doubt they could squelch their grief together. If Matt's love had overpowered Shagon's hate with its gentleness and mercy, couldn't their unity and strength help them combat their demons as a couple? Couldn't it provide them with the will to persevere?

Yes. Yes, it could, Will thought, feeling soothed by her proximity to Matt, their favorite willow tree, and the breeze. It had lost its strength and now acted as a lullaby instead of a burden. Will closed her eyes and allowed herself to feel whole and hopeful.

WARNING: LONG AUTHOR'S NOTE AHEAD! EXIT THIS WINDOW IMMEDIATELY IF YOU DETEST READING WALLS OF TEXT!

Author's Note: Wow. I finally wrote this oneshot after several months of wanting and promising to write it. I won't lie, the idea was a daunting one. The part of it that scared me the most was Will and Matt's dialogue. I wanted to capture their discussion about the events that occurred between episodes "L" through "S" without making their dialogue seem too cartoonish or unrealistic. I discussed this matter with Sweetbriar beforehand and she said that the problem writers run into is when they have characters reveal too much about an intense topic. She suggested that I take the route where these two discuss a few topics and keep it vague. So that's exactly what I did. I also carefully planned out their conversation via an outline in a word document instead of following a mental plan like I usually do. That helped loads. (Note to self: Planning in the form of a written, detailed bulleted list/outline pays off BIG TIME!! :D)

Thanks so much for the words of advice, the suggestion to create an outline, and for helping me relax, SB! :D It was extremely helpful and I really appreciate it! -hugs- Also, I plan on responding to your PMs this evening. In some ways I've been busy with life, but in other ways I've just been kinda selfish and caught up in my own little writing world, which is very mean and unfair to you. I apologize for that. :/ The same goes for your message, Merilin. I shall respond to it tonight. ;)

Although I initially experienced oh-so-typical-omg-Eve panic when I started writing Will and Matt's conversation, I eventually calmed down. Perhaps too much. It actually got to the point where I was so at ease that I had to stop writing and dance around the loft to "Black or White" by Michael Jackson because I became hyper from a sense of accomplishment. (Note: This song will be making a cameo in a future W/M ficlet. Watch out for it!) If any of the dialogue in this piece strikes you, the reader, as being unrealistic or unreasonable, please let me know in a kind way and provide me with specific feedback on how it can be improved. The eye of an outside viewer often picks up on the small details that the writer's eye doesn't.

All right, dialogue aside, I am extremely proud of this piece for many reasons, one of them being that I finally gave Will and Matt some angst to deal with. I felt like I added depth to their relationship. I balanced out the angst with a fluffy, hopeful ending, but that's just because I like balance. And, well, I'm a softy, and I thought they deserved some relaxation after a very emotional ordeal. I also like "Their Willow" because of the obvious symbolism and my continued lack of adverbs. Using "ly" words on occasion instead of engaging in adverb abuse has really opened me up to new methods of description. This makes me very happy.

Yay for me actually managing to post two fics in a month here on FF[dot]net! And one that's over fifteen hundred words for that matter. :D Let's hope I can continue to do this after spring break when school resumes.

Next up is... I'm not tellin' you. It's gonna be a surprise. :P ;) But I know you guys will like it. :)

You know the drill. If you found any typos let me know. If you have any concrit be tactful about how you word it.

That's all. As per usual, thanks to everyone who faves, reviews, and adds my fics to their communities. I really, really appreciate it! Much love to you! x333

'Till the next time, emeraldflame out!