(A/N: Yes, I make fun of Twilight too much. Yes, I have way too much fun doing it. Yes, it is sad that there are probably people who actually act like this out there. Enjoy!)
Crazy About Twilight
Diana was sitting in Dr. Madden's office, crying her eyes out. Dr. Madden wasn't totally following what she was so upset about, but he tried to pay attention, since that was his job.
"And then…" Diana blubbered, "Bella chose Edward over Jacob, even though she and Jacob were perfect together! And Jacob ran away into the forest! And…oh, it's so sad!"
"I see," Dr. Madden said. This wasn't the first time he'd had to sit through one of Diana's very in-depth summaries of the Twilight books. "I'm…very sorry about that."
"Why haven't you read the books?" Diana asked between sobs. "They're only the awesomest, sweetest, best books ever. You'd love them."
"Trust me, I know enough about them that I never want to read them," Dr. Madden muttered under his breath.
"What was that?"
"Nothing, nothing. Diana, I want you to stop obsessing over these books and pay attention to your family. Also, stop asking everyone if they're vampires. It's not polite."
Diana raised an eyebrow. "You're just saying that because you're a vampire, aren't you? OH MY EDWARD! YOU ARE! MAKE ME A VAMPIRE, PLEASE!"
Dr. Madden sighed. "Sorry, Diana, but we're all out of time. Maybe next week." He held the door open for her, and Diana walked out of it, still yelling.
"YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE ME A VAMPIRE! YOU'LL SEE!"
Dr. Madden just shook his head in frustration.
(A/N: Reviews are love!)