AN: This is just something I thought of while I got dragged somewhere I will not mention. I did want to do a Pokémon fic first, so I decided I might as well publish this, even though it's pretty short. I don't THINK I'm breaking any guidelines, but if I am, tell me and I'll change it. I'd rather this not get taken down if it's avoidable.

Like any good son on a Pokémon journey, Gold visited his mother on a regular basis. After coming back to an empty house a few times and several embarrassing incidents that will not be mentioned, they finally established a set date: every other Wednesday.

They had a set routine as well. When he returned home, his mother would ask him how he'd been, and he'd launch into a very long and unnecessarily detailed description of every action he had taken since the last time they'd talked. It would often involve sudden, unrelated tangents, such as a rant about how expensive Super Potions were getting, but she drank in every word attentively. By the time he was finished, it would be time for dinner and she would cook something. Gold would proclaim his undying love as he salivated over the meal. Then he'd practically inhale it. Finally, they would do the dishes together, Gold washing and his mother drying, before he left on his Togekiss.

This time, oddly enough, his complaints about the smelly Muk his neighbor owned was punctuated by a phone call. What was even more odd was that he actually picked up instead of letting his Pokégear go to voicemail.

"Uh-huh . . . yeah . . . just talking to Mum, like normal," was Gold's half of the conversation. "Yeah, I'll be back tonight. No, Lyra isn't home. Ok, bye."

"Who was that?" his mother asked him curiously.

"Oh, just a friend," Gold replied vaguely. He couldn't tell her who it actually was unless he felt like dying. Gold quite liked his life as it was, thanks. Although he wouldn't mind if his boyfriend was just a little less violent . . .

It was when they were doing the dishes after spaghetti and meatballs that he sprung the news on her.

"Oh, by the way Mum, I'm gay," he said casually, while he scrubbed the saucepan.

To his surprise, she dropped the dishtowel and sank to the floor, pounding her fists on the tiles. "NOOOOOOOO!" she wailed.

Gold stared in surprise. "Gee, Mum, I hadn't pegged you as a homophobe."

"Oh, I'm not," she said. "But now I can't have grandbabies!"

"Mum, we can adopt," Gold pointed out.

"Oh, right," she said, perking up instantly and getting up from the floor, resuming the drying as if nothing had happened. Three seconds later, she stopped as a thought struck her. "Wait, we?" Her eyes started shining. "Are you in a relationship with someone? Tell me, tell me!"

Gold started edging away from his overeager mother, wondering yet again how she could be so bipolar and cursing his slip of the tongue. "Er, I'd love to Mum, really, only I think he'd kill me."

She clapped her hands together excitedly. "So you are! Is it with that nice Silver fellow who visited last month?"

"Only Mum would describe him as nice," Gold thought amusedly, discreetly finishing the last dish and setting it on the counter so she wouldn't have an excuse to keep him there any longer. "Great to see you Mum, bye now!" he shouted, making a mad dash for the door.

He loved his mother, but Silver was going to throttle him when he found out.