A request for SpellboundWinter. Sorry if it's shit, sweetie. Thanks for getting me back into writing again. You've gotta start somewhere. :)

Disclaimer: I do not own South Park. It rightfully belongs to Trey&Matt!

Poor Boy

He should have known better than to be convinced by Craig and Clyde to spend his weekly allowance on a shitty videogame that he didn't have a console for. He also should have known better than to take his girlfriend out on a date to the shitty McDonald's in the South Park Mall's food court. Of all the restaurants in town, he could have taken her to a fancier one that would live up to her standards, like Café Monet. But no… all he could afford was a twenty piece chicken nugget and large fry meal.

And a hot coffee.

Go figure.

The wild blonde fumbled the cup in his hands, taking long sips to cure his jittery madness. He muttered his usual "God" and a "Jesus Christ" under his breath before biting into a juicy McNugget. W-why'd I take her here in the first place? Tweek wondered to himself. She's not enjoying the food or the luxury of her comfy booth… ARGH! Why did you take her here?! 'Cause you're poorer than Kenny, that's why! … You cheap asshole!

Rebecca lifted her eyes from her textbook. She set her pencil down that she had been jotting notes with and took a quick sip through her straw. Then she noticed her boyfriend was getting himself into a twitching fit. Again. The little girl shook her head, knowing he had nothing to worry about. She reached over the table to take one of his hands and give it a firm squeeze. The boy breathed in and out before he reached for his cup. But Rebecca playfully slapped his hand away and scolded him.

A second later, she apologized to him and relaxed into her comfy booth. Gentle eyes pried into Tweek's, finally settling him down.

"What seems to be the problem today, sweetie?" she asked, her tone obviously worried.

"N-nothing," he muttered quietly. "I'm… agh… fine!" He quickly added, his voiced hushed, "… Heh, n-not fine…"

Rebecca, who didn't hear Tweek's last sentence, shut her book and slid it to the side. "If you say so."

She sighed, eyeing the untouched fries on the tray between them. Hearing her stomach give an achy rumble, she blushed and started to go for a handful. Oh, this was sin. If her parents were here with her now, she'd—Rebecca then froze at the encountered touch with her boyfriend's fingers. With a horrific scream, Tweek jumped back, shaking like a single leaf on a bare tree. The poodle girl snuck back her hand and put it in her lap.

"Go ahead," she said. "I'd like for you to e-a-t… eat something… you seem hungrier than I am. It seems that you haven't eaten all day!"

Tweek looked guilty as he reached for the first fry. Rebecca clasped her hands and gave him a warm smile of reassurance.

"Sweetie, there's more enough to go around! Please. Eat."

But the boy could not. Why would Rebecca Cotswolds, one of the only girls to grow up and eat grains and mashed berries in her cereal, take a bite out of a greasy McDonald's French fry? … This was blasphemy. Tweek's face fell into his hands, mumbling about that Rebecca couldn't quite make out. She leaned over the table, offering the box of fries to him.

"What was that, dear?"

"… IsaidthatI'mabaaadboyfriend," he blurted a mess out.

A look of shock embedded itself into Rebecca's face.

"… Why?" she questioned, hands latched over her mouth. What on earth had gotten into her sweet Tweek? Calling himself a bad boyfriend? There wasn't anything wrong with him!

The boy slumped into his booth, hoping that he'd slide off the edge of the world. But no, no… he was still in a chattering crowd of people at a McDonald's that reeked like hell, and the most adorable puppy dog eyes that he'd ever seen in his ten-year-old life. He felt both his hands being held in Rebecca's grip. She motioned him to scoot over and Tweek, not wanting to cause an argument, did so. Rebecca covered him in cuddles and innocent kisses of comfort.

"Not one negative word out of your mouth for the rest of the day, mister," she told him, planting one last kiss on his nose.

"Good God, Rebecca!" he burst. "We're in a McDonald's because of my stupidity! Jesus Christ, GRAHH! It's my fault that we're here, I should have spent my money more wisely or not at all, I could've taken you to the Ritz but—agh!—"

"Tweek… Tweek, calm down, sweetie…"

"But now… Now I've become like Kenny, and I'll have'ta live in a little shack by the railroad tracks if I'm lucky, and I'll cook meth and make money like that Jesse character from Breaking Bad—"

I guess one more kiss wouldn't hurt, Rebecca thought to herself, tapping her fingers together mischievously.

She bent forward and left a chaste kiss on his moving lips. This was it… the last attempt… if this didn't work, she would be completely out of ideas.

For only a moment, Tweek melted between the girl's cupped hands across his cheeks. He moaned in pleasure, and when Rebecca moved away, he craved for her more than coffee. Rebecca pressed her forehead against his, grinning.

"You are not going to be poor, Tweek," she stated. "And even if you were, I'd live with you."

"Y-you would?" Tweek jittered excitedly. "Oh God, Rebecca! AGH! That makes me so… so happy! You'd save my ass if you'd live with a poor little shit like me!"

Rebecca's fingers traced his under lip lovingly, her eyes glowing with affection.

"As long as there's no meth involved, I'm sure we'll be just fine."