Disclaimer: Inuyasha's not mine… But I'm sure the poem is.
Oi, minna-san, wasabi! Eh...hehe….*cringes under cruel glares* Okay, okay, gomen nasai for such a long hiatus; I honestly went through about twenty revisions of this chapter because I just never quite got what I wanted. Anyway… thanks to all who read this. In addition, I'm experimenting with html, so things could get a little weird…
Episode 4:
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I promise you, I won't cry
When your limbs are torn away from mine,
I promise you, I won't say a thing.
I'll rip my mouth out, rip my mouth out.
I'll swallow my tongue.
The words are already branded there,
To burn in your writhing flesh forever.
You'll be reminded when you toss and turn
Should you dare to sleep,
…Ai shiteru, my whisper
…Ai shiteru, my lover
No, I won't say a thing.
-Houteki's Apostrophe to Rosutokoi, from The Sun Sets at Dawn. (c. 2994)
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"Kagome! Hey! Kagome!"
Officially drenched by the pouring rain, Kagome looked up, veiled by her screen of hair. The rain, the cold enhanced her numbness- the ache that had been very carefully explained to her by the psychiatrists.
"Sudden loss as such is perhaps one of the most traumatizing that can be experienced by a retainer. The process of recovery is slow, but if you understand it, healing will be all that much easier. The first thing is shock, as I can see you are now feeling, but you must be aware, you must listen. Kagome, later is denial- subconsciously or not. Some retainers find it impossible to move beyond this point. You must understand: it is like ripping a band-aid off your skin. Shocking to do, but then you rub away the hurt and move on. The quicker you realize the slave is gone, the sooner you shall move on with your life. In the denial stage, you will feel as though something is missing and not know what it is. You will search for the slave.
"He will not be there.
"All this is normal, although we have never had such a violent incident. Nonetheless, the following step is anger. Sometimes is comes slowly, sometimes it is an immediate thing; it all depends on the person. A retainer and slave relationship is an intense one built over long years of companionship. Much like that of mother and son, sister and brother… or love and lover. As a point of medical note, would you consider your relationship… the third one?..."
She remembered it hollowly, feeling the word echo sullenly in her chest. "No."
And then the sudden sigh of relief from the psychiatrist. "Well that makes things by far simpler…"
The conversation trailed off and Kagome nodded or shook her head obediently as required. The rain began.
The investigators arrived. Against the best wished of the doctors present, they demanded Kagome kept for analytical purposed. Two hours later, she was a discarded piece of evidence sitting in the sidelines beneath the hood of a flashing ambulance, entranced by the blankness of her own mind, a void that replayed her slave like a vid again and again. She extended a hand into the night- desiring to feel something tangible, something beyond the empty space where her stomach and heart should have been. She shoved her hand in her armpit. The rain was just cold.
"Higurashi, hey now, Higurashi!" The voice brought her into the present.
"Huh?... Oh. What?"
"You're done here, girl." It was Otenba, her boyishly young face locked in a pretense of a smile. "The damn investigators have finally decided they're finished butting their fucking faces in and are leaving the small fries- us, you know- to clean the rest up." She shook some of the rain off her police slicker and sat down, exuding an aura of sympathetic companionship as best she could. Kagome could not help but notice the automatic distance Otenba put between them. After all, a …man freely touched me, touched my skin! she shuddered.