A/N: I've been trying to justify a Xiaolin Showdown and KHR crossover and this idea popped into existence. Jack could be a formidable villain if he had the resources and training. For the sake of the story, I'm going with the fan theory that Jack is albino. Hope you all enjoy and feel free to leave a review!

Disclaimer: I don't own Katekyo Hitman Reborn! or Xiaolin Showdown!

A Loser like Me

When Tsuna was ten years old, Nana encouraged him to get a pen pal. He didn't think he had anything to lose at the time, if anything the stranger wouldn't know how useless he was. They would be writing back and forth in English so Tsuna had gathered all his courage to get tutoring from the smartest girl in his class, Hana Kurosawa. She had been skeptical about his request at first, thinking that he just wanted to approach Kyoko. His body was trembling and he practically shoved his letter in her face. From what she could read it seemed this Jack person was bullied as well and wanted to make a friend.

"Alright Tsuna, but you have to take this tutoring seriously. No slacking off, got it?" Tsuna looked up, an excited gleam in his eyes that she had never seen before. Probably because the stupid monkeys are always calling him stupid and useless. I don't think I'd be able to smile either. Hana thought guiltily. "For now we'll translate the letter and send a reply. Between now and your next letter we'll be going over the basics until you can write and speak English in your sleep."

Dear Sawada,

My mom is making me write this so I can "make a friend" since I suck at being social. It doesn't help that my classmates are morons and keep making fun of a medical condition that I have. I'm trying to get out of school but so far no luck. I was thinking of getting myself expelled by planting a smoke bomb in the principal's office. Hope your life is better than mine is.

Jack Spicer

Hana learned that if Tsuna had a teacher that actually gave a shit about him and encouraged him, that Tsuna wasn't a total moron. He bought a English/Japanese dictionary and a beginner's guide to English. Over time Tsuna picked up on the foreign language and could admit to being bilingual. Kyoko had eventually learned about Hana's tutoring sessions and decided to drag the poor boy with them everywhere. The stupid monkeys would shoot Tsuna jealous looks, only to be scared off by the ice queen herself.

Dear Jack

My mom thought this would be a good idea too. At least you are smart, everyone in my school thinks I am useless. I would like to be your friend, not that I know much about being one. Did that smoke bomb plan of yours work? And can you make other things too? You don't have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable or anything. The only thing I can build are Gundam models. And call me Tsuna, Sawada would be my dad.

Tsunayoshi Sawada

Jack had been surprised to get a response back and ecstatic that someone other than his grandmother was taking an interest in his inventions. He had gone through with his plan and his mother finally agreed to let him take online classes. He was light years ahead of his peers anyways, why not get his education over with? His mother had opened the door to their basement, only to smile to herself when she saw Jack searching for a pen and paper in the usual clutter. "Mom, do we still have the crime scene photos of the prank I pulled?" He yells.

XoXoXoXoXo

Jack and Tsuna wrote about everything in their lives, up until the point that they reached their teens. Jack didn't think that Tsuna would believe him about mystical items and elemental powers while Tsuna was afraid of dragging his first friend into the mafia world. Every time Reborn would try to pry information about Tsuna's pen pal out of the teen, he would become stubbornly silent no matter what methods he used. Reborn could somewhat understand, after all his guardians were all roped into being his friends with Reborn's interference. But Tsuna needed a full set of guardians and if he couldn't find another Lightning, then Lambo would be his default choice.

Dear Jack,

I'm now positive that my current tutor is a demon. He's a pretty shady guy so if you see anything suspicious in the mail, burn it. Things here are pretty hectic since my grandfather decided that I was going to take over the family business. I can barely manage my own life, much less subordinates and employees! I wish I could shoot Reborn out of a canon but knowing my luck it would backfire somehow. Hope things are better on your end.

Tsuna

Jack reread the letter, pursing his lips. He'd been an a slump for a couple weeks now and he was not looking forward to having his butt kicked by the monks and whoever wanted to use him as a punching bag. From what he heard about this Reborn guy, he was on a Chase Young level of douchery. "Dude, I need a vacation." He grumbles, rubbing his irritated red eyes. With Tsuna he had a kindred spirit, the only other person he could sort of claim as a friend was the cheese ball Omi. He was too clueless to purposely insult him, goodness was practically running through his veins. Then Jack had a brilliant idea and grinned.

Dear Tsuna,

Things have been craptastic here too. I was planning to take a break and figured I could visit. And I am not taking no for an answer either, by the time you get this letter I'll already be there. Besides, I have some cool designs I think you might like. I made an automated gumball machine that spits gum out at people as a weapon, the look on Omi's face was priceless!

Jack Spicer, Evil Boy Genius, Out.