Roses Have Thorns
Roses have thorns, and silver fountains mud:
Clouds and eclipses stain both moon and sun,
And loathsome canker lives in sweetest bud.
Shakespeare
Prologue
"I can't live without you," he said.
She didn't want to hear these words coming from him. He was the reason she was there. First, he killed Michael, her lover, and then he exposed her father to her as the puppet master that he is. Finally, Gibbs chose him over her. Each step there was a chance for everything to work out, but Tony was there and Tony's actions forced her on the road to Somalia, on the road to being tortured and abused.
"Talk to me, Ziver," said Gibbs.
Standing there in his basement, she was dressed in NCIS sweatpants and tee shirt. She looked at the man that she thought of as more of a father than her own flesh and blood. He was housing her and taking caring of her, and, more importantly, keeping him away from her own father.
"I cannot work with him," she stated.
Gibbs knew whom she meant. Ever since they came back, her attitude towards DiNozzo had changed.
"He was behind the rescue mission, Ziver," Gibbs said.
He grey blue eyes stared at her. She was broken and he had to fix her. Abby and Ziva had become his daughters, his replacement for Kelly.
"I do not care, Gibbs. I was in Somalia because of him, because of his thoughtless actions," she hissed.
Her dark eyes filled with tears. Gibbs put down his sander, walked over to her, and took her in his arms. He kissed her head.
"I want you to talk to Ducky tomorrow," he said. "Will you do that for me?"
"Yes, Gibbs," she said with a sob.
"I'll take care of DiNozzo," he said.
"I don't' want to hate him, Gibbs, but I do. I hate him," Ziva sobbed.
"I understand, Ziver. I understand," he said.
NCIS
Ducky sat on Gibbs sofa beside Ziva. He listened as she confided in him. His heart broke as she told him how she blamed Tony for her pain. Ducky nodded understandingly and patted her hand. When she was done, Ducky smiled. He told her that she should take her pain medication and go upstairs for a nap. She kissed his cheek and went up the stairs.
Once Ziva was gone, Gibbs came into the living room and sat down in the armchair. He stared at the geriatric medical examiner, who seemed lost in thought.
"How is she, Duck?" he asked.
"In pain," he said then he reached for his cup of tea and took a sip.
"What is this thing she has about Tony?" Gibbs asked. Gibbs was honestly confused by it. Before he killed Rivkin, it always seemed like Ziva and Tony were one-step away from shattering rule 12. When they were together, they smoldered.
Ducky sighed. His affection for Anthony DiNozzo was that of a grandfather for his favorite grandson. Both men liked to talk and both men liked scotch. But, this was about Ziva.
"She has transferred a great deal of her anger and pain to Tony. He was there every step of the way as things went badly for her. Rivkin, Tel Aviv, and in many ways Somalia. If Rivkin wasn't dead, he'd have been on that mission. If Eli wasn't exposed by Tony, she probably wouldn't have been put on that mission. If you had chosen her over Tony, she would have come home with you. Each step involved Tony," Ducky said.
"Including saving her," sighed Gibbs.
"She is not being rational right now, Jethro. She is a young woman in pain, both physically and mentally. In time with therapy she will become rational, but right now she feels what she feels," Ducky said.
"He loves her, Duck. This is going to destroy him," Gibbs said.
"And she loves him, which is probably why she has chosen to hate him. He should have protected her from Rivkin or her father. She is lashing out at him because she wanted him to be the one in her bed not Rivkin. If he was then this would have never happened," Ducky said.
"What do we do?" asked Gibbs.
"What do you do, Jethro," Ducky revered it on him. "She needs you. And, eventually, in the coming weeks she needs to come back to work and rebuild her self-esteem, as well as go to therapy. Unfortunately, she can't work with Anthony. She will need to be with another team."
"No," said Gibbs. "I need to protect her Ducky. She needs to stay with my team. Tony is ready to run his own team. I'll talk to Vance about it."
Ducky sighed. He was afraid that it would happen this way. Leroy Jethro Gibbs was a difficult man and he seldom did things the easy way. In many ways, he was now picking between his children and he was choosing the one who needed him the most, even if it destroyed the other one.
"Do think about your decision, Jethro. Anthony doesn't have family other than us," he said.
"She needs us now, Duck, and I won't let her father get his claws into her again," growled Gibbs.
NCIS
Tony got to work on time for a change for a Monday. Instead of spending the weekend womanizing or drinking, he spent it listening to music and wondering how he was going to bridge the gap between him and Ziva that existed right now. He understood that she needed time, four months being brutalized in a terrorist camp in Somalia was devastating for anyone, but for his ninja who was used to being strong and independent, so it must have been unbearable to be unable to do anything but endure for four months.
McGee was down with Abby doing God knows what and Gibbs was somewhere, which left tony alone in the bullpen. He looked at Ziva's empty desk and sighed. For the first time since Wendy, he felt as if he could completely commit to one person, and that person was Ziva.
"DiNozzo," Gibbs yelled from the mezzanine.
Tony looked up and saw him. He waved to Tony to join him. Tony stood up adjusted the black silk tie he wore then the jacket of his black Armani suit. In a matter of moments, he found himself in Director Vance's officer with Gibbs. They were seated at the conference table. Tony looked over at Gibbs, who refused to make eye contact with him. He looked like the proper gunny sitting straight in the chair with his eyes forward.
"Special Agent in Charge James Han is retiring and we need a replacement. Agent Gibbs told me that he believes you are ready to step up and take on the load of being a leader. After what I saw you do in Tel Aviv with Eli David and Somalia I agree," said Vance.
"Han – isn't he in Singapore?" asked Tony.
"He's the SAC in charge of Singapore," said Vance. "I want you to take the job. It's a big one, Tony. NCIS is the only Defense Criminal Investigative Organization in the area. Singapore is the main field office but Singapore is responsible for overseeing Manila, Sydney, Perth, East Timor, India, Indonesia, Laos, New Zealand, Papua, Maldives, Fiji, Malaysia, Philippines, New Guinea, Solomon Islands, Sri Lanka, Tonga, Tasmania, Thailand, Vietnam, and Diego Gracia to name a few. It'll be a hard job."
Tony looked over at Gibbs, who finally made eye contact with him.
"Take the job, DiNozzo. It's time you go. I've already asked Vance to reassign Stan Burley as my senior field Agent," Gibbs said.
Gibbs felt like a bastard, especially as he saw Tony's face almost crumble with shock and pain. Tony felt as if Gibbs had taken a knife out and gutted him like a fish. He almost couldn't breathe, so he looked away from Gibbs and to Vance.
"Do you want the position, Tony?" asked Vance.
"I guess so," said Tony.
Vance broke out into a smile. He offered his right hand to Tony to shake. Tony shook it.
"Congratulations, SAC DiNozzo," he said.
Tony looked at Gibbs, who nodded.
"It's for the best," Gibbs said.
"Yeah. For the best," Tony repeated the words.
He got up on unsteady legs hoping either man noticed that he wanted to fall to his knees and scream.
"Well, when do I need to report?" he asked.
"You have a week to get your life in order," said Vance.
"Sounds like a deal," smiled Tony. It hurt to smile but he knew it was expected of him. He walked out of the Director's office and headed to the Men's Room to vomit.
NCIS
Abby was the hardest one to tell. He told McGee with a smile and slap on the shoulder and McGee bought that he wanted the promotion to Singapore. Ducky gave him a knowing nod and Jimmy a surprisingly warm hug. However, Abby the Goth dressed as if a Catholic schoolgirl took it about as well as he thought she would: she balled her eyes out. Tony gave her a big warm hug.
"I pinkie swear, Abby, I'll keep in touch," he said.
"It won't be the same. You'll be gone," she said. "Why, Tony, why are you deserting us?"
"I'm not deserting you, Abs," he said.
"Yes, you are," she cried.
For the rest of the day he filled out paperwork with personnel and avoided Gibbs who avoided him. Once work was out, Gibbs went home to Ziva and Tony followed. He parked his Mustang and waited ten minutes before he finally drew the courage to talk to Gibbs and see Ziva. It needed to be done.
Walking up the porch steps, he rang the buzzer instead of knocking or just busting in. Gibbs opened the door and sighed when he saw it was Tony. Tony's green eyes met Gibbs' blue eyes. Both men felt the tension.
"That was a fun day. Right boss?" he said.
"Why are you here, DiNozzo?" asked Gibbs.
"Need to talk to you and Ziva. You owe me that much," he said.
Gibbs walked into the house. Tony followed him and shut the door behind him. Standing in the doorway between the living room and dining room was Ziva. She had on sweatpants and tee shirt with her dark hair down and wild and her dark eye staring at him with anger.
"Talk. I'll be in the basement," Gibbs growled then opened his basement door and disappeared.
"You heard about my so-call promotion?" he asked her.
She nodded yes.
"What do you think about it?" she said. "Half way across the world is about as close to me as I want you."
"Ziva," he said with shock.
He started to walk towards her but he saw her tense up and look almost afraid. Tony stopped. This wasn't his Ziva before him but a broken woman. He needed to be careful with her.
"You want me to go," he said.
"Yes," she answered.
"Why?" he asked.
"I hate you. You killed Michael. It should have been you not him then my father sends me to Somalia to fulfill Michael's mission because of you. I hate you," she spat at him.
Tony's insides turned to stone. She was right about it. Everything was his fault. She suffered and almost died because of him. Without thinking, he walked into her personal space. Ziva immediately slapped him across the face. It stung, but she wasn't done. She slapped him again and again and again until he finally stepped away from her. He could taste the blood where his lip split.
"I'm sorry," he said softly.
"That is not good enough. Nothing you do is good enough," she said coldly.
"You're right," he said. "Tell Gibbs I won't be bothering him or you again."
He turned and left. Ziva fell to her knees and started weeping. She couldn't explain why but it hurt to see him leave.
Chapter One
Fifteen Months Later
Tony sat in his office reading reports from Sydney, Perth, and Manila. The NCIS field office was located in Sembawang Wharves, as part of the Changi Naval Base. The PSA Sembawang Terminal housed the COMLOG WESTPAC, PACOM, Pacific Air Force, Commander Pacific Fleet, Commander Seventh Fleet, US ARMY Pacific, as well as USAF 497th Combat training Squad. Like Sydney. Perth, and Manila, Singapore mainly a port of call rather than a busy hub for US ships to be stationed. Hundreds of ships passed through with plenty of naval personnel to get into trouble, especially since a good time could be found in Singapore.
Singapore was a city state, three and half times the size of DC with a population of almost five million. The main language spoken was English, but on the streets, you could hear Singlish, a mix of Cantonese, English, Malay, Hokkien, Tamil, and Teochew. There was no cool season here. The temperature averaged a humid ninety degrees during the day and a humid seventy degrees at night.
Tony tossed the reports on his desk and stood up. Gone were the days that he wore expensive suits. His usual work attire now was either cargo pants or jeans with a linen oxford shirt or safari shirt, sensible and durable shoes or hiking boots and a black blazer. Suits weren't practical in the hot and humid weather. He just sweat through them.
Stretching his body, which was a good twenty pounds lighter since he was in DC; he looked out at his squad room. His MCRT was working a missing Petty Officer and the contingency agents were busy enough preparing for the USS Reagan and accompanying ships arrival. He was tired. About six months ago, he developed insomnia. He now averaged about three hours of sleep a night. His smartphone rang. He reached into his cargo pants and pulled it out.
"DiNozzo," he answered.
"It's Inspector Kuan," said Inspector Lee Kuan.
Tony had developed a good relationship with Kuan and the Singapore Police Force.
"Hey, Lee," Tony replied.
"I have a body in the red light district in a seedy hotel. Looks to be a LT Commander Marvin Burns. I thought you might want this one," he said.
"I'll be there with my ME and a couple of agents," said Tony. "What's the problem?"
"You'll see," he said then hung.
Geylang was the Red Light District of Singapore. It was filled with Beauty and Body Spas, brothels, cheap hotels, and every perversion imaginable. The Hotel in question was Hotel 81. Tony arrived with Agent Benny Chan and Michael Forrest, who wore NCIS windbreakers and hats, as well as the ME Dawn Chang and her assistant Kim Santiago. Tony and the agents pulled up in a Honda Accord while the ME arrived in a mini-van. Compacts and smaller cars dominated the city.
Entering the hotel Tony pushed passed some police by showing his badge. Inspector Kuan saw him and smiled.
"You made good time," he said.
"Show me the damage, Lee," said Tony.
Lee led him to the elevator. In third floor hotel room, Lt Commander Burns was lying on the floor. A rope bound him around his ankles, his genitals, around his wrists behind his back, and his neck.
"Popular way of tying up customers for prostitutes who have customer who wants sexual asphyxiation," Lee said. "My men were going to call it either accidental death or suicide. Suicide, bodoh shit."
Bodoh shit translated to ignorant shit. He smiled and Tony laughed. Tony turned and addressed his men, who carried their forensic gear.
"Work the crime scene. Once you're done I want you then to start canvassing," he said. "I'll accept accidental death or murder but not suicide."
"Yes, boss," the two men said in unison.
The attractive petite, black haired ME came in with her assistant. He shot her a warm smile.
"Dr. Chang, sorry to ruin your dinner," he said.
"I had no plans," she said then she went about to get to work.
"You let me know what you find out," Lee said to Tony. "Some of my men are cheena."
"I understand, Lee," smiled Tony.
"So, what are you plans for the night?" Lee asked Tony.
"I'm supposed to go to a dinner at the Eagle Country Club, but I think this gets me out of it," he said.
"Maybe you go to some hump hump bar instead," smiled Lee.
Tony yawned. He was getting too old for hump hump bars.
"I think I'll just go back to the office, read some reports, and wait to see what we have here," said Tony.
Tony walked over to Dr. Chang.
"Hey, Doc, I'll be in my office. If you have anything tonight, please let me know," he said.
"I'll have you buy me a cup coffee," she said.
"Sounds good," he said then he turned to Chan. "Don't forget to get the security tape. Bring along one of Singapore's finest to get it, too."
"Sure, boss," he said.
Tony strolled out of the hotel room. LT. Commander Burns didn't kill himself, but if it was an accidental death, does he let it slide. He decided when the time came. It was going to be a late night.
NCIS
Ziva got in early enough so that Stan wasn't at his desk. No, it wasn't his desk, it was Tony's desk. Eight months into therapy, life became clearer for her as she realized what she felt for Tony wasn't hate. It was something completely different, but she had managed to get him banished to Singapore. Except for Abby, who still wouldn't talk to her, Tony didn't get in touch with any of the old team. From what she heard, Vance was thrilled with the job that he was doing.
About a month ago, they had a Singapore agent come through the office. He was headed to Rhode Island after three years in Singapore. It seemed that Tony DiNozzo was no longer the man they remembered him to be. According to Agent Munn, he didn't wear expensive clothes; there were no film quotes, no joking, or sense of humor, just a driven professional who didn't seem to have a personal life. Ziva went home and cried that night.
Stan came strolling into the office. He tossed his backpack down behind his desk and gave Ziva a smile.
"Morning, Ziva," he said.
"Morning, Stan," she replied.
McGee was the next to come in. He looked tired.
"Morning, guys," he said, as he headed to his desk and collapsed in his seat.
"Playing online or writing another book?" Stan asked.
"Book," sighed McGee.
"What's wrong?" asked Stan.
"I decided to kill off Agent Tommy. It's too hard a character to write without DiNozzo around," he admitted.
Ziva heard this and stiffened. McGee was killing off Agent Tommy. Tony was never coming back. Gibbs came walking through the bullpen with his coffee.
"If you kill off Agent Tommy, I want you to kill off Tibbs," growled Gibbs.
"Boss, you… I mean Tibbs is the main character. There is no book without him," said Gibbs.
"Hardly a team without Tommy," Gibbs said.
Stan and McGee looked as if they had been head slapped, while Ziva found herself in agreement with Gibbs. The team still functioned but not as well. They still had the best closure rate at 92 percent, but that was down from when Tony was there. Also, everything just seemed harder now.
"Okay, maybe I won't kill off Tommy," McGee offered the peace offering.
Before the conversation could go any further, Abby came into the bullpen.
"His Stan, McGee," she said.
She ignored Ziva and Gibbs, who she blamed equally for Tony's absence. Gibbs knew how angry she was at him. He tried several times to make amends, but he had to settle for some days were better than others. Today was not a good day. With a file behind her back, she turned and looked at Gibbs.
"Agent Gibbs," she said.
"What is it, Abs?" he sighed.
She brought the file from her back and dropped it on his desk.
"Here are the tests you wanted done," she said.
"Thanks, Abs," he said.
Without another word, she walked away. Today was a bad day.
NCIS
Vance waited for the hook up with the Singapore field office. There was a twelve-hour difference, so SAC DiNozzo agreed to be in the office at midnight for this face-to-face. The head tech brought up Singapore. Suddenly, there was DiNozzo standing in Singapore's MTAC. He was wearing jeans, a khaki safari shirt. His sandy hair was longer than it used to be and combed to the side without the spikiness and he had a few days' worth of beard.
"SAC DiNozzo, sorry to keep you at the office so late," Vance started the meeting.
"No problem, Director," Tony answered.
"You've done a remarkable," said Vance.
"Thank you, sir," Tony said. "Shall I start with LT Commander Burns?"
"Please do," said Vance.
"We are recommending accidental death. It appears that the LT Commander Burns hired a sixteen-year-old prostitute. We have him on a security feed entering the hotel with her. It appears that Burns like autoerotic asphyxiation. I interviewed the girl. He had her tie him up in a rather embracing way and since this was her first time, she tied it too tight. He started choking to death and she couldn't get the knot out. When this happened, she panicked and ran leaving him to asphyxiate. I turned her over to Inspector Kuan of the Singapore Police Force," he explained.
As he finished his explanations, Ziva slipped into MTAC. She had no idea that Vance was talking to Tony. In twenty minutes, she had a hook up with San Diego. She was shocked to see him on the screen. He looked tired with darkness under his eyes and he'd lost weight. Staying in the shadows she listened to them talk.
"Good job. What are they going to do with the girl?" Vance asked.
"I asked Kuan to run her through the system for prostitution and get her released. It's not her fault she was picked up by a kinky pedophile Commander," sighed Tony.
"Agreed," said Vance. "Our next topic is a happier one. Assistant Director Kimble has taken a job with Homeland Security. I am offering you the job of Assistant Director of Southeast Asia, Special Agent DiNozzo. Do you accept?"
"Me? Really? May I ask why, sir?" Tony asked.
"Because you have proven yourself more than capable and that field office covers more territory than any other. I need a hands on Assistant Director and that's you. Do you accept?" asked Vance.
"It seems like I've found a home in Singapore. I've been searching for one most of my life. I thought I had found it in DC, but I was wrong. Singapore is it," Tony smiled. It was a little forced, but Vance chalked it up to being midnight in Singapore and the man had probably at work for fifteen or sixteen hours or more.
Home. Ziva felt her insides tightened. He had a home in DC and family and she forced him out.
"Paperwork will be processed and I'll send out a system wide e-mail about the promotion," said Vance. "You'll be doing a lot more travel now, so I'd make sure you pick one or two agents who you trust as your private security. You'd be amazed how a title can draw people's attention."
"I've already got a couple men in mind who I trust," said Tony.
"Get some sleep, Tony. We'll be having more of these conversations," said Vance then he gave the kill sign and the screen went blank.
Vance turned and started to head up the stairs when he saw Ziva sitting in the back row. He stopped to talk to her.
"Agent David, I've been meaning to talk to you. Have you spoken to your father at all?" he asked.
"No, Director. Our relationship is strained since Somalia," she said.
"I can't blame you. You've made a great recovery, Ziva. You should be proud of yourself," he said.
"The recovery came at a cost. I made some mistakes when I first came home," she said.
"You were broken when you came back to us, so, of course, you may have made some mistakes. You are no longer broken, Ziva," he said. "Anyway, you can always make up for your mistakes."
"Can you, Director? Can you really?" she asked him sincerely.
"I believe that you can if you put the effort into it," he said. "Trust me I have made a great many mistakes."
"I hope you are right," she said.
Vance smiled and nodded: "I do, too."
He walked out of MTAC leaving Ziva thinking about her mistakes.
NCIS
He wore his black Armani blazer with a white linen shirt and pair of khaki linen pants. It was his first day in the big office for Tony. He thought he would have been nervous or excited but he wasn't. Tony felt sort of empty. When he checked his e-mail, he saw one from Abby congratulating him and one from Stan Burley doing the same then a short e-mail from Ziva, which surprised him. It also congratulated him. Of course, there was nothing from Gibbs and he didn't expect anything.
His secretary Janet Yam let Tony's replacement into his office, SAC Linda Morimoto. Linda was half-Irish and half Japanese with beautiful long black hair, which she wore up in a bun.
"Linda, take a seat," Tony said.
"Congratulations, Director DiNozzo," she said.
He smiled.
"I thought we could start with human trafficking. Usually, this doesn't fall under our jurisdiction, but there is a rumor about some of our sailors being involved in a local ring," he started.
"You want me to start an investigation on this ring," she said.
"Yup. Use the MCRT if you like," he said. "Also, I need two men for personnel security. It seems that the title director brings attention from killers and kidnappers."
"How does Hank Thornson, who is an ex-Marine, and Mike James sound?" she suggested.
"Talk to them for me, Janet," he said.
"I will," she said.
"Call from Sydney field office on the line, sir," Janet Yam said over the intercom.
Tony picked up the phone and hit the intercom button: "Thanks, Janet."
He pushed the blinking red light button:
"Assistant Director DiNozzo here."
"Director, this is SAC Linus Philbin. First off let me congratulate on your first day on the job," Philbin said.
"Thank you, SAC Philbin," replied DiNozzo then he waited for the real reason for the call.
"I think we may have a serial killer who likes US sailors," he said.
Tony closed his eyes and sighed: "I'll be on a plane in the morning. Let Vance know."
"Ace. I'll have some amber fluid waiting for you. You're going to need," said Philbin.
"It's that bad," said Tony.
"If I wasn't in charge I'd chuck sickie on this one," said Philbin.
"I'll see you tomorrow," Tony hung up.