The Lunch
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Kathryn and Chakotay placed their trays on the table and sat down opposite each other, Kathryn facing the galley. Neelix followed them closely behind and once the two officers had taken their seats, he placed a flower between the two silvery trays, as he usually did when both the captain and the commander were in the same table having lunch together.
"Bon appétit!", he uttered cheerfully. "Enjoy your meal!"
"Thank you Neelix", Kathryn said mellowly and looked the Talaxian for a moment, until he realized it was time for him to leave them alone.
"What was this dish called again?", Chakotay asked quietly.
"I don't remember", Kathryn whispered. "But I guess it is too late to retreat now. He is obviously very delighted that we both decided to have lunch here today."
"We should have known better by now", he joked.
"Yes, we should have", Kathryn agreed and took the fork in her hand. "But we have been in worse situations, so I think we can handle this."
"Really?"
"Well, you have eaten in my quarters so whatever this is; it must beat easily some of the worst disasters I have replicated."
Chakotay laughed. "Well, at least I know what I put in my mouth in your quarters", he pointed out. "Most of the time."
Kathryn gave a laugh, shook her head, and took a bite. Once she swallowed the forkful, she raised her right brow and said: "This is most definitely something… peculiar."
"It's eatable?"
"Hmm-mm."
"You are not convincing me, Kathryn."
"Neelix is watching us", she whispered. "Eat."
"Is that an order?"
"I would call it a recommendation."
"Ah… so it is an order", he joked and took a bite.
"Well?"
"Hmm… as long as this doesn't put Voyager's systems in danger, I think my stomach can handle it, too."
Kathryn smiled and took another bite. "Well, we are making him happy, and happy morale officer helps the crew to be happy, too."
"All the things we do for them…"
Kathryn laughed and took a sip from her glass.
"So", Chakotay said then more seriously. "The response for Hayes."
Smile faded from Kathryn's face as well and she put her fork down.
"It's weird, Chakotay", she said then.
"What is?"
"How quickly this all has happened."
"Quickly? What do you mean?"
"It feels like it was yesterday when we had a 70-year-long journey ahead of us. And now… Hayes said five of six years and those deep space vessels reach us. Five years is considerably shorter period of time than 70 years."
"It's not" he agreed. "But we wouldn't exactly be in the Alpha Quadrant at that time."
"I know, but we wouldn't be alone either."
"And that worries you more than it encourages?"
"Worry? No. But it's going to be a whole different journey with those vessels with us."
"Like it was first with Equinox?", he asked.
"Yes. I guess I am a little cautious because of how that ended up being. And because of Hayes, too, and what he represents. I know it's not exactly logical, like Tuvok would say, but I cannot shake off this cautious feeling that I have when I think about that upcoming encounter with those Starfleet vessels. 70 years has gotten a lot shorter quite quickly."
"I thought you never believed it would take us that long."
"I didn't", she confessed. "But eventually I became to realize… or I was ready to accept that it would take considerably long time for us to reach the Alpha Quadrant."
"We have been very lucky, Kathryn", he reminded.
"I know", she said briefly, a slight sadness in her eyes. "Kes…" she whispered then.
"What?"
"Kes gave us the first jump", she whispered.
"Yes she did", Chakotay said softly. "And we shook off ten years."
"Ten years is a long time."
"It is, but we have jumped over 20 000 light years since. And once we did that 20 year jump, it truly changed everything around here."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, one part of the crew had lost any hope of returning home during their lifetimes, and they adjusted to the thought of living here. But once we shook of that 20 years, the 'final doubters' had to admit that there is a realistic chance to see the Earth again; that this is journey is indeed just a temporary thing for all of us."
"Five of six years…", she continued then. "It feels such a short time now."
"It's the time we have already been here", he reminded. "Not any shorter than that. A lot of things can happen in five or six years."
"You're right."
"And some things that won't", he continued. "Some things are can be resolved only in the Alpha Quadrant. There are things to look forward to, which could happen during our lifetimes."
Kathryn looked him in the eyes for a moment until placed her fork on the tray in front of her. She knew what Chakotay had said, but she didn't know how to reply. She was aware of certain postponed things that lingered between them, but she hadn't given those things much of a thought recently, like she hadn't to him, either. This lunch was the first in a long time they had been like this; talking like friends instead of officers.
"Is everything alright here?", Neelix, who had appeared next to their table, asked cheerfully and the silence between Kathryn and Chakotay was broken.
"Yes Neelix", Kathryn told.
"Do you need anything? More water perhaps?"
"No thanks", Chakotay informed calmly.
"Very well then", he stated. "I'll be right there in the kitchen if you need me", he informed.
"Thanks", Chakotay stated briefly.
Once Neelix left, Kathryn let her smile appear. "See?", she asked. "He is so happy that we are here. We are boosting the moral of the moral officer."
"You are, Kathryn", he stated.
"You are too, Chakotay. How could you not?"
"But how are we going to get the response done, if he's jumping to our table every few minutes?" Chakotay wondered and smiled.
"I guess we have to start, then", she suggested. "Immediately."
"Yes ma'am."
"So", Kathryn said and took a padd in her hands. "He wanted to know about the status of the crew, first contacts, and our interactions with the Borg."
"How much does the Starfleet know already? We did send them the logs during our first 'call' with the Starfleet Command few months ago."
"True. And since then the only drones we have encountered are the children."
"First contacts", Chakotay said then.
"I can review my logs for those."
"So we can skip straight to the Maquis situation."
"So it seems", Kathryn sighed.
"You are worried, Kathryn", he noted then.
"That surprises you?"
"A little."
"I just hope we manage to phrase certain things correctly, so that it will become crystal clear what kind of crew this is and how valuable everyone on this ship is."
"Meaning?"
"Six years ago you were outlaws, criminals. I have seen the change, because I have lived it, but I don't know where they stand. I don't know what exactly the official opinion of the Starfleet is when it comes to you."
"Well, in that case", Chakotay started. "You should be precise with you words, and tell them that Chakotay, who is constantly causing problems, is currently assigned to deck 15 cleaning the plasma relay room with a micro-resonator."
Kathryn smiled and shook her head. "Deck 15?"
"That's as far as I can get from the bridge on this ship", he told. "So the captain won't get any disadvantageous influences from the big bad Maquis man."
"Who is getting bad influences from whom?" Kathryn asked and raised her brow. "It just might be the other way around."
Chakotay smiled. "Maybe."
"Besides", she continued. "If I wanted to punish you, cleaning the plasma relay room wouldn't be my first option."
"Really?", Chakotay asked playfully. "And what would the ultimate punishment be? Sitting in a front row on holodeck 2 watching Doctor's photographic essays in daily basis?"
Kathryn laughed. "Something like that, yes. Or I could even order you to help him in creating one."
"That would be pretty cruel. However, that contains the risk that you would have to come and see it."
"Ouch."
"I think we should stick with our supportive and cooperative aspects of this relationship instead", he whispered.
"I think you're right. So how do I phrase that to Admiral Hayes?"
"Just simply describe how incredible I am", he stated without blinking an eye.
"Really?" Kathryn asked with a smirk. "Are there any specific wishes how I should describe your… fantastic and glorious abilities on this message?"
"Well you could mention something about how I keep this ship and crew together, and how irreplaceable I am, and how you couldn't imagine doing this without me."
Kathryn laughed. "Oh… I see that you have this figured out already."
"Just telling you how it is", he noted playfully.
"Irreplaceable, huh?"
"I could settle with words like 'amazing' or 'the most important person', too."
"Hmm-mm", Kathryn replied containing her laugh. "And what kind of picture would Hayes get from that?"
"Pretty accurate one, I think."
Kathryn laughed. "I'm sure. So the troublemaker working on deck 15 is not an option anymore?"
Chakotay smiled and said: "I think we should stick to the truth. Honesty has always been a defining quality of Starfleet officers."
Kathryn smiled and leaned towards him: "You are impossible today", she told him. "Should I check the logs and see what you had for the breakfast?"
"Well, if we had breakfasts together, you wouldn't have to dig that information from logs", he replied.
"That would be one way to keep my eyes on you."
"Definitely something worth considering about."
Kathryn laughed. "Maybe I should relieve you from duty for the rest of the day. It seems to me that you could use some sleep."
"Oh, I don't know", he replied and looked her in the eyes. "I might not want to stay in bed… all alone there, nothing to do…"
"Careful", Kathryn said quietly. "If you don't slow down, I might tell Admiral Hayes about you."
"You would blab about me?"
Kathryn laughed. "Well, he did ask about the status of the crew, and so far this conversation has revolved around you. I just might be encouraged to tell all about you, and leaving no room for the rest of you former crew, or the five Equinoxes."
"All about me", Chakotay said and smiled. "I'm glad to see that I have finally gained a special place in your… report."
"You are in pretty exceptional position on this ship", she stated and took another forkful from her tray.
"I'm glad you have noticed."
"Oh, I am aware of my first officer."
"Glad to hear that. Nothing brightens commander's day better than special attention from the captain."
"Really? I have to remember that…"
Chakotay, who was enjoying their current bantering very much, was about to respond, but a sudden call interrupted him.
"Captain!", Neelix said cheerfully while he was approaching to their table once again. "Now that you are here, I was wondering if you would approve my idea of upgrading the kitchen."
"Neelix", Kathryn stated calmly as she placed her fork on the tray again. "Your attempts to enhance the plasma burners with Seven's Borg technology wasn't exactly successful, so I must inform you that whatever you are planning, I might be a little skeptical."
"Oh captain…", Neelix gave a laugh. "That little incident burned my brows only. I have learnt from that. Besides, losing brows is hardy an inconvenience when you have burned your face on the Norcadian beach under the two suns, I can tell you that. But I learnt my lesson from that incident too, so needless to say that I shall never forget my dermaline hypospray again, no matter what shore leave is in question."
"Hmm-mmm", Kathryn stated and gave Chakotay a quick look.
"What is it, Neelix?" Chakotay asked.
"Well, I had a little chat with Vorik the other day and he said that it would be possible if…"
"Neelix! There is a fire in the kitchen!", Kathryn yelled all of the sudden, cutting his explanations off.
"Oh!", Neelix cried out and started running towards the galley. "Don't' worry, Captain! This happens every now and then. Nothing to be worried about! Out of my way, ensign, please!"
"What on Earth is he trying to suggest now?", Kathryn wondered and looked Chakotay.
Chakotay laughed and shook his head. "I think Neelix is done developing his kitchen for a time being."
"I think you're right", Kathryn agreed. "Or else this deck is getting the most hazardous place onboard."
"See captain; this is under control already!" Neelix informed all the way from the kitchen. "It was just the 'rohto' on a stove. It has a little flammable quality in it so I must keep my eye on it for now, until its done!"
Kathryn leaned back on her chair and sighed with a smile.
"So where were we?", Chakotay asked then.
"On the Maquis and the Equinoxes."
"Right."
"I think we have to check the reports of all the accomplishments each of them have accomplished and report truthfully about them. We need all the hands onboard that we currently have, no matter who is doing it and I want to emphasize that in my message."
"But obviously Hayes should also be informed about insubordinations", Chakotay pointed out.
"Of course", Kathryn sighed. "I just don't like the fact that some of these insubordinations should be reported more in detail than others, just because someone has a different background than the other person next to him."
"It is what it is, Kathryn", Chakotay reminded.
"I know. And I know I see my crew differently than any admiral in Alpha Quadrant does at the time being."
"True. But think it as this way; what ever there is waiting for the Maquis there, your report has most likely little effect on the possible charges they'll face."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, if and when we are charged, we are charged by the things we did during the resistance, not during our duties on this ship. Of course positive reports could help those admirals see how certain people here have advanced during the years, but who's to know if that's enough."
"Chakotay…", Kathryn said and looked her intensely. "I haven't really even considered that you would be imprisoned. I mean I have obviously known that it is a possibility, but…"
"I don't think that's something any of us would think consciously every day. But it is a realistic possibility, yes."
"I want you to know that I would, and I will, fight them with everything I got."
"I know", Chakotay said and smiled. "You would most likely do just that even if I would ask you not to."
"Would you ask such a thing from me?" she inquired.
"I would, if I knew it would do you harm", he told. "You come first, Kathryn."
Kathryn's heart leapt. Sometimes Chakotay succeeded to touch her heart so effortlessly, and this was one of those times. Kathryn kept looking deep into his eyes. She wanted to take his hand in hers, but they were in the mess hall, and therefore such a personal gesture was something she wasn't ready to demonstrate. But she wanted to, now more than in a long time. She wanted him to know how much she appreciated him and how much she...
"So, did you enjoy your meal?! Neelix, who had come to their table again, asked.
Kathryn almost jumped on her chair. "Yes", she managed to say. "Thank you."
"Anything for the dessert? I have some wonderful..."
"No thanks", Chakotay informed bluntly.
"Well, the captain surely would like to have a cup of coffee", Neelix pointed out and looked Kathryn with sparkling Talaxian eyes.
"Coffee would be nice, thank you."
"Coming right up!" Neelix informed and started pacing towards the kitchen. "And I make a cup for you too, Commander!"
Chakotay and Kathryn exchanged looks again and they both smiled.
"So, do have you considered what you are going to say about the five Equinoxes?" he asked then. "I'm sure Hayes would like you to include them to your message."
"Yeah. I should say something about them, too. I just don't know exactly what."
"Well, they are most definitely going to face a trial alongside us."
"I'm facing the court martial too", Kathryn reminded. "It's a standard procedure to all ships that have been lost."
"I think you have nothing to worry about."
"One can never be too sure", she said briefly. "What comes to the Equinoxes…"
"They have done their best here", he reminded. "They have truly tried, Kathryn."
"Good."
"But I get the feeling they still haven't found their place on this ship. And they are very unsure about you."
Kathryn nodded. "I'm still quite unsure about them."
"They are good people. They have done their share of mistakes, no one is denying that. But the former Maquis are good people too, and they still don't see their past as something to regret about. That is how we and the five others differ."
"I know", Kathryn sighed. "And I cannot believe how quickly we have arrived to this situation where we have to start facing these things. Why do I start to get the feeling that returning home might not be as wonderful as we have expected?"
"None of the Maquis have forgotten what is facing us there, but everyone of us is still fully devoted to get us all there in one piece. You are not responsible what they have done in their pasts, Kathryn."
"But I feel responsible of them now, and especially because of this trip. This is not just one Starfleet starship crew among the others, Chakotay."
"I know, but when we get there, when ever that is, I think the circumstances require you to see them as just a crew."
"I'm not sure if I can do that", she confessed. "Could you?"
"I'm not sure", he told. "But what I am sure of, is that there is also a lot of good about getting there. A lot."
"I know", Kathryn said. "But I know already how strange it is going to see this crew breaking into pieces, shattering apart."
"We will never be truly apart", he said then. "We will remain close no matter in which Quadrant we are."
Kathryn looked Chakotay and she started to wonder if he was referring to the crew as a whole, or perhaps just to the two of them. Which ever it was, she agreed. They had grown together and a thought of them not being together was against all she had learnt to know; like a variable that just didn't fit to the equation.
"And here comes the coffee", Neelix informed and placed two steaming cups on the table.
"Thanks you Neelix", Kathryn said.
"Now, about the suggestion that I had…", Neelix started, but Chakotay quickly cut him off. "Not now Neelix", he informed.
"But…"
Chakotay gave the Talaxian a serious look. Neelix noticed that and understood perfectly what it meant.
"Enjoy your coffee", he said then and backed off. This obviously wasn't the right day for him to shine with his brilliant suggestions.
"How many times has he interrupted us exactly?" Chakotay asked then and smiled.
Kathryn laughed. "I guess we would have accomplished more during this lunch, if we had been in my ready room instead."
"I guess we would have", Chakotay agreed. "Maybe we should continue this later."
"I think we should."
"Dinner?"
"Are you sure your stomach can take it? Both Neelix and me during the same day… it could be a risky move."
"What if I do the replicating?"
"Aah… well that sounds like a plan to me."
"So dinner it is", he stated. "And if we are distracted again, we would have to seriously consider the possibility of the breakfast, too."
Kathryn smiled and took another sip of coffee. Chakotay was definitely in a playful mood. But she liked it, since there hadn't been many moments for them to be like this.
"Maybe I should watch over your shoulder when you're having your breakfast, if this day is any indication", she whispered.
"And what would you expect to observe?"
"About your breakfast, you mean?"
"Yes."
"Oh, I don't know… Romulan Ale, Klingon Bloodwine… or knowing your liking to certain soup; those mushrooms Neelix brought onboard a month ago."
"Are your referring to the ones which he claimed to be fully safe, until he cooked them, tasted them, and ended up staggering to the sickbay?"
Kathryn laughed. Chakotay's smile widened too and soon he gave a laugh as well. Kathryn deduced from the look in his eyes that this banter of theirs was obviously very enjoyable from him too, and that made her happy. They may have not gotten much done when it came to the reply message for Admiral Hayes, but otherwise the lunch had been a successful one. It certainly boosted her spirits by wiping away most of those worrying thoughts the admiral's message had created.
"Tuvok to Captain Janeway", was the next thing they both heard.
Kathryn sighed. "Looks like we have to take our coffee with us", Kathryn said and Chakotay nodded with a smile. Then Kathryn tapped her combadge. "I am on my way."