[RN: Hello~! I need to drop off a few things before I get this started...

Disclaimer: Characters are copyright to Hidekaz Himaruya, but the storyline and writing are copyright to me. You may share the link to my blog or blog post, but you may not repost my writings without my permission.]

Drown yourself in guilt

drown drown

Fill up your lungs

until no more.

"No...please. Stop." I started to panic as soon as he brought over his kanata with maniacal glare plastered on his face.

"Nei. Bye-bye nii-san," he whispered with a smile.

I immediately turned around to make a run for it but it was too late...

"STOP ARU!" I tried to regain my breath as cold sweat ran down my face.

"Yao-Yao? What's wrong?" Small violet eyes peeked from under the covers.

"AIYA!" I fell off the bed hitting my butt pretty hard. I rubbed it as I tried to get up. "I-Ivan?" I called over to the small child as it popped out of the bed covers. "What are you doing here?"

"You invited me over da," he tilted his head. I got lost in this child's adorableness. Is it a sin to be so darn cute aru? The moon seemed to be a spotlight on him. He may seem small but his features reflect as strong willed but his eyes said something else. It seemed lonely and cold. Those same precious violet eyes could be so mesmerizing, they always caught my attention. Without a word, I climbed back to bed curled up. I was trying to recall when I invited Ivan over and my strange dream/vision until he spoke.

"Nightmares, da?" He whispered looking up at my hanged lanterns. I looked up to him, without a word. He scooched closer to me, hugging my face. I couldn't help but hug him. He was half my height but he was growing fast ever since I found him.

"I have them often. They don't bother me anymore but I found a way to make them go away..." he spoke as he were telling a secret.

"How, aru?"

"By being with the one who makes you smile," he said with warmth in his voice. I couldn't help but smile at the thought of having a child comfort me to sleep. It temporally brought an end to my "nightmares." I wasn't sure what they meant but this has continued for several nights now. Having my brothers, my family betray me was a nightmare I didn't want them to become reality. Though there are many reasons for them to do so, I wasn't ready to bring up the truth yet. It was too risky. My thoughts were calmed down by Ivan's smoothing voice. He had the most innocent voice, it seemed I had an angel in my room. I began to close my eyes. My guilt slowly began to drift away.

If I told you the truth, would you still be my side?

Or would you betray and take advantage of me...?

Somethings are better left unsaid.

China: Ah yes, I remember when Ivan was a child. Kawaii aru~! -daydreaming-

Russia: Am I not cute now? (;J;)

China: Um, yes but compared but not compared as when you were a-

Russia: -teary eyed-

China: Aiya! Y-you're still cute, ok aru?

RN: -sighs- Better stop before anyone gets butthurt. Anyway, arigato for reading. Please review and all that good stuff, they make my day. QwQ