A Night of Glasses, a Crazy Night: New Year's Eve in Buckingham.
Chapter 1: A Knight to the Rescue.
"It was a Night of glasses,
It was A Crazy Night,
I kissed your lips,
I got lost myself alone,
And that's the story"
Lord Melbourne was happy and laughing with enthusiasm. He did not remember how much time had passed since he had been so genuinely happy and was able to enjoy the festivities as in the distant years of his youth.
When Lord Melbourne was a teenager and a young gentleman, he had been life of the of all the parties, a boy who with his presence would wake up the fun in any meeting. Then he fell in love for the first time and got married, and for a while he thought he was the happiest man in the world. But their marriage was not happy for long ... the birth of their sick, psychically handicapped son was the first blow and many other blows quickly arrived. His wife cheating him and left with another man, and the scandal was known throughout the country, humiliating him in front of the high society to which he belonged. His wife returned soon after her lover left her, but that only made the embarrassment and humiliation worse because she remained obsessed with her lover for the rest of her life, and told, her entire version of the story in an infamous novel.
The death of his mother, of his unfaithful wife and of his poor sick son, filled Lord Melbourne with profound pain and terrible loneliness. Not even the aphrodisiac elixir of political power filled the void in his life, even though he ruled the most powerful Empire of his time as Prime Minister, as Head of Government of His / Her Britannic Majesty. That's why Lord Melbourne had wanted to leave power and retreat to his Brocket Hall refuge to death, even secretly wishing death would come soon.
But then one day the old King who had twice asked him to form a government died ... and then a niece of the King, a young girl just out of adolescence, became Queen ... and Lord Melbourne's life underwent a radical change ...
Now a year and a half later, Lord Melbourne and Victoria seemed more husband and wife than Queen and Prime Minister. Lord Melbourne practically lived in Buckingham Palace, went to the Palace every day and spent long hours with the Queen, sometimes working in affairs of state and other times walking with her on foot or horseback, sitting chatting animatedly in a room of the Palace, eating together, participating in parties where they used to dance together, and even posing for her to draw him. Almost all the time they were happy when they were together, and they laughed at the jokes and anecdotes that Lord Melbourne shared with her. Even he used to sleep in the Palace, at Victoria's insistence that he had had a guest bedroom permanently reserved for him, in which he remained part of his wardrobe and other personal belongings. Anyone who saw them together would think they were a couple in love, despite the enormous age difference between them.
And that was the only small dark cloud that darkened Lord Melbourne's happiness, because he suspected that what she felt for him was inappropriate in the eyes of the political interests that ruled the country ... and he was sure that what he felt for her was inappropriate ... But above all he feared what would happen the day he lost her forever, the day she would have to marry another man, almost certainly a foreign prince of European Royalty, because that day the darkness and pain them would return to his life.
But that night the dark thoughts were not present in the head of Lord Melbourne, quite the contrary. And it was no wonder, because it was a special occasion.
It was the night of December 31, 1838, that is, New Year's Eve, and in a short time the new year 1839 would begin.
It was the second New Year that Lord Melbourne received alongside Victoria. The first, the one from the year 1837 to the year 1838, was the first that occurred with Victoria as Queen. On that occasion Victoria (who had just over six months in the Throne) insisted that him be present at the relatively small party she was going to organize in the Palace to celebrate the arrival of the new year, and he agreed happily. Now again they both were together to celebrate that magical and happy moment when a year dies and a new one is born.
Lord Melbourne and Victoria danced with pleasure and enthusiasm, and she felt as if she were levitating in his arms, as they turned around the room. Throughout the night they mixed with the guests separately, in the little groups that formed in the main room, but always they both reunited after a while. They did not stop talking, and Victoria did not seem to tire of the anecdotes and sarcastic jokes of Lord Melbourne.
In his enthusiasm Lord Melbourne allowed himself to lose a little of his self-control with alcohol ...
Sometimes Lord Melbourne acknowledged to himself that he drank a little more than was advisable. The years of loneliness and pain, of terrible emotional suffering, had made him dependent on alcohol as an anesthetic to the pain of his soul. It had been many years since Lord Melbourne used to fall asleep in an armchair in his library, both in Brocket Hall and in Dover House, drinking until he lost consciousness and fell into deep sleep. That's why in both residences he did not use the bed, at least to sleep ...
Evidently in the increasingly frequent occasions in which he slept in Buckingham Palace, he could not do so out of respect for the Queen, to take care of the image of the Court. Then Lord Melbourne was forced to sleep in a bed, in his room in the Palace ... but he did not stop drinking, because Buckingham's servants provided him with the liquor he needed every night in his bedroom.
But Lord Melbourne had a contradictory relationship with alcohol (as with so many things in his life) because there was always the unpleasant memory of the man he called father. The 1st Viscount Melbourne, the husband of Lord Melbourne's mother and his legal father, but that with almost all security him not his real father (he must have been one of his mother's lovers) was a violent and unpleasant man whose aggressive nature and cruel was aggravated by his alcoholism. Lord Melbourne did not want to be like his 'father' and for that reason, and to preserve his dignity and fulfill his duty as a politician of his importance should, he tried to curb his liking for liquor by restricting it to reasonable limits.
Particularly at the parties in the Palace, he was careful not to overdo it ... but that night he allowed himself to drink a little more, because after all it was New Year's Eve and even royalty and the aristocracy allowed themselves to relax the protocol on that occasion. In fact there was more than one gentleman who looked as if he had drunk a lot, but without losing his composure.
Lord Melbourne was more concerned that Victoria was drinking more than was advisable ... at the Coronation Ball the young and inexperienced Queen had drunk too much champagne and that had put her in a somewhat embarrassing situation, and she almost even looked for a kiss on her lips of him. But tonight Lord Melbourne was relaxed about it, because although Victoria drank some drinks throughout the night, she seemed to have learned the lesson and kept the situation under control.
But something else worried Lord Melbourne more. That night he had appreciated that there was more tension than usual (which was already a lot) between Victoria on the one hand and Victoria's mother (the Duchess of Kent) and Sir John Conroy on the other side. At the beginning of the party, Victoria had briefly told him that she had had another strong argument with her mother before beginning to dress for the occasion, and as always the reason was Conroy, the man that Victoria hated but that for her mother him was surely much more than a friend.
Conroy had almost lost hope of having a relevant role in the Victoria Court, after his greed and lack of scruples had made him hope to be the true power behind the Throne, turning Victoria into his puppet. But that was precisely why Conroy was full of rancor and anger, and used his pernicious influence on Victoria's mother to harass the Queen.
Lord Melbourne knew that at some point the situation had to be resolved with the final expulsion of Conroy from the Court, but he understood that Victoria delayed the decision because that could mean the definitive break with her mother, and a painful and contradictory relationship of a mother and daughter was always a complex issue. Lord Melbourne was angry and desperate because he hated anyone who hurt his beloved Victoria, but not even a Prime Minister could do anything against the Queen's mother.
Lord Melbourne noticed the gestures of anger and tension in the faces of the Duchess of Kent and Conroy, and how they saw Victoria with rage. He saw that Victoria was trying to ignore them both and every time she saw them nearby, she would go away and go to another corner of the room.
However, at one point Lord Melbourne saw that Victoria had gone to a room attached to the room where the party was being held, and shortly after saw that Conroy was heading to the same place. He imagined that they were both going to meet in the hallway, and his protective instinct from her alerted him, so excusing himself with Lord Alfred and other people he was talking to, he left his drink on a table and went to the place, without running but without losing time.
When he went out into the long corridor, Lord Melbourne looked for them but he did not see them. But then he heard angry voices coming from another corridor that was around the corner, at the end of the hall where he was. Lord Melbourne hurried to the voices, and he went like a Spanish Fighting Bull when was released in a bullring in Spain ...
"Release me! ... How dare you miserable coward!" Victoria shouted furious and anguished, with hatred reflected in her face and with tears in her eyes, because Conroy was holding her tightly by the arm.
"Ungrateful ... little snotty! ... You do not feel gratitude or respect even for your mother! ... Everything we did for you to be a Queen worthy of your lineage and this country! ... We waste our lives because you are no more than a spoiled and shameless girl! " Conroy shouted, with anger in his face and spitting on Victoria his alcoholic breath, because he had drunk too much.
"Traitor! ... Let me go, you hurt me! " Victoria screamed more scared.
"You're a…! " Conroy replied ...
But then Lord Melbourne appeared and pushed Conroy hard against the wall, forcing him to release Victoria. Lord Melbourne grabbed Conroy by the lapels of the suit and cornered him.
"Bastard!" Lord Melbourne shouted, losing his usual calm and his face contorted with rage.
"How dare you!" Conroy exclaimed that recovered from his initial surprise, he faced Lord Melbourne trying to push him, but Lord Melbourne did not release him and both men struggled a bit, and Conroy also grabbed Lord Melbourne by the lapels.
"How dare you, scoundrel! ... It's the Queen!" Lord Melbourne exclaimed furiously.
"If you do not let me loose I ...! " threatened Conroy.
"Will you kill me? ... It's me who should kill you right now!" Lord Melbourne replied and his eyes said he was very serious.
"No, please! ... Please, Lord M ... it's not worth it!" Victoria begged crying desperately, while holding Lord Melbourne by an arm ... she was scared to death but not for her but for him, because she feared that the confrontation would end in a duel between both men and his beloved Lord Melbourne could be hurt or die.
"I will not tolerate this offense, I ...!" Conroy replied.
"Although the executioner will save me the work," Lord Melbourne said with a threatening look.
"The executioner! " Conroy exclaimed surprised and a little scared.
"Attacking the Queen is Treason and is punishable by death," said Lord Melbourne.
"I did not attack her! ... I just ...!" Conroy said terrified, beginning to understand the seriousness of his act.
"Put your hand on a Monarch to attack it is Treason! Even if it's just a slap, twist it arm or give it a pinch ... Our laws, old but in force, say it's Treason and it can be punished with Capital Punishment ... But even if you can convince a jury not to send you to the gallows, rest assured that at least you will spend most of the rest of your life in a filthy prison ... And at this moment I want to call guards, to order them arrested you, and to denounced you for destroy your miserable life," said Lord Melbourne with cold and terrible determination, as if he himself were the executioner and was about to execute Conroy.
Conroy opened his eyes and his face broke down, paled, and he saw Lord Melbourne and then Victoria.
"Forgive me, Drina ... sorry, Your Majesty ... My behavior has been shameful, unforgivable ... I beg for your clemency, Ma'am," Conroy said humiliated, with tears coming out of his eyes, and with his body trembling with fear.
Victoria saw him with hatred and fear, but she kept silent. Lord Melbourne released Conroy and moved a little away from him, but he stepped between Conroy and Victoria to protect her, in case the man lost his reason again.
"I think that the best thing, Sir John ... is that you leave here and leave the Palace this very night. If you do not do it, I must report it to the guards ... for the safety of the Queen, I can not allow you to sleep in the Palace tonight ... that is why you will leave without saying goodbye to anyone, not even the Duchess ... Tomorrow you will write to the Duchess apologizing for your absence with some clever excuse ... then you will write to Her Majesty asking for forgiveness ... and if Her Majesty is compassionate, you will not end up in jail. Then we can think of a way that your final departure from the Court is not scandalous ... a way for you to preserve your appearance of dignity and have a comfortable retirement ... But what is certain is that your days at the Court have ended, one way or another, Sir John," said Lord Melbourne looking at him with a terrifyingly, intimidating gaze that he had never had to use before in his life ... then he turned around a bit to see Victoria, but him still watching Conroy out of the corner of his eye, "Of course, if you agree with all this, Your Majesty," he added, addressing her.
Victoria nodded. Conroy saw them both with ill-concealed hatred, him feeling humiliated and frightened, defeated.
"I'll leave immediately ... with your permission, Your Majesty," Conroy said in a broken voice, making the deepest and most painful bowing of his life, and then left without waiting for Victoria to give him permission to withdraw.
Lord Melbourne and Victoria watched him go, and when he was sure him was far enough away, he turned to see Victoria with concern.
"Are you well, ma'am? ... He has hurt you?" Lord Melbourne asked with great and sincere concern for her, and having the certainty that if she told him that Conroy had done her some damage, he would run after him and when he reached him he would kill him.
Victoria saw him with her huge blue eyes full of tears ... she felt intense mixed feelings at that moment. Rage, pain, fear, shame, gratitude ... and love, a lot of love for her savior. Without thinking, Victoria threw herself at him, hugged him, buried her face in Lord Melbourne's chest and began to cry inconsolably, pouting.
Lord Melbourne was surprised and was shocked for a moment, not knowing how to react. With arms outstretched, not daring to close them around Victoria. His duty dictated that he could not embrace the Queen, that intimate physical contact between the two was a sacrilege, possibly illegal ... but at that time she was not a reigning Monarch, she was an anguished girl, who suffered not only because of the violent act that had just happened but for many years of loneliness and pain, by all her young life full of sadness, and that aggression had only served to remind her of all those painful experiences and concentrate them in a moment of humiliation.
No, he could not separate her, although what they did was wrong, because there were moments in a person's life when words were not enough comfort and it was necessary to express consolation with the hands, with the bodies ...
Looking to one side and the other to make sure no one saw them, Lord Melbourne closed his arms and embraced her, and him felt her body shudder with the warm contact of his strong arms. Victoria clung to him with more strength and wept more vigorously. Lord Melbourne stroked Victoria's back with one of his big hands, and whispered in her ear, as it is would done with a little girl to stop crying.
"Easy, ma'am ... easy! Already everything happened ... them are inevitable things, the world is full of despicable people, scoundrels, and you only had the bad luck that one them were in your destiny ... You could not choose who to have in your life, others decided for you when you were vulnerable, and they wanted to undermine your spirit to become you a slave to their desires, their greed ... But you overcame them, because you are brave and audacious ... you are better than all of them, and you have fire in your heart ... I am very proud of you, I really am," said Lord Melbourne, his voice cracking with emotion.
"Are you proud of me, Lord M? " Victoria asked in a girl's voice, pouting, without taking her face away from his chest.
"Of course! I'm proud of what you've done since we met that day in Kensington ... if you allow me to say it, ma'am, you're becoming a great Queen ... and I'm sure you will not need me very soon ... But meanwhile, I feel proud to be able to help and protect her ... I will protect you with my life if it is necessary, ma'am," Lord Melbourne replied sincere and excited.
Victoria pulled her body a little away from him, and saw him with bright eyes, tears and emotion.
"Lord M ... I'm so important to you!" exclaimed Victoria, shocked and emotional.
"You doubt it? Ma'am, you are the most important thing to me ... you are ..." Lord Melbourne responded warmly, but then he was interrupted.
Surprisingly Victoria had stood on tiptoe and putting her hands behind Lord Melbourne's head had drawn him to her, and had kissed him on the lips. A clumsy kiss for her inexperience, but passionate, rubbing her lips with despair over his lips.
Lord Melbourne reacted instinctively and with the barriers of inhibition diffused by alcohol, and by the adrenaline that still ran through his body ... him corresponded to the kiss, his lips eating that mouth that he longed so much, that he wanted so much. He opened and closed his mouth over Victoria's small lips, rubbing them with energy, kissing her with passion. But then Lord Melbourne regained his sanity and with it the control of his senses, and turned away from Victoria sharply.
"No, ma'am ... we can not!" exclaimed Lord Melbourne scandalized, almost terrified.
"Easy, Lord M! We do not have to keep hiding our feelings," Victoria said with a sweet smile, approaching him, but Lord Melbourne stepped back to keep the distance between them.
"Feelings? No, ma'am ... this is a confusion, we are both ..." Lord Melbourne replied desperate.
"Lord M ... you must not fear! I know this scares, and believe me I'm a little scared too ... but we can overcome the obstacles. It is no use denying what we feel, our feelings are very clear ... I love you, Lord M!" Victoria said excited and nervous, but happy.
"Ma'am, please! You are confused by what just happened with that scoundrel, it was something terrible and you are disturb, you ..." Lord Melbourne replied anguished.
"No ... I know what I feel! ... I love you! ... You do not love me, Lord M?" Victoria asked turning serious and desperate, almost pleadingly.
"Ma'am! ... This is inappropriate ... absolutely incorrect! If we were in our senses ..." Lord Melbourne replied altered.
"Inappropriate! ... Incorrect! ... Is that how you call fact of kissing me? Because you responded to my kiss!" Victoria exclaimed in anger.
"I ... I beg your pardon, Your Majesty, I ..." Lord Melbourne answered embarrassed.
"Don't call me 'Your Majesty' at this moment!" Victoria replied quickly approaching him with a look of anger in her eyes and clenched fists, in a way that surprised and intimidated Lord Melbourne despite the short stature of Victoria, "Do not use the most formal treatment with me when we we just kissed ... 'Lord Melbourne'! ... Do not you dare to use it because I feel like slapping you! If you corresponded to my kiss it is because you feel something important for me ... because only then would you dare to overcome that reverential respect you feel for my dignity and turn your back your venerated sense of duty ... Only a rogue without scruples like the damn Conroy would dare to play with his Queen's feelings, especially if she is an innocent young woman like me ... and you are not a scoundrel, Lord Melbourne, although you are certainly stupid and at this very moment I am so angry with you that I would ... I want to whip you! I know you're too decent to play with me and that's why I know you feel love for me ... And I demand that you tell me!... You are in love with me? As your Queen I demand that you answer and that you do it with the truth!" Victoria added red of anger.
Lord Melbourne felt for a moment the desire to corner her against the wall and kiss her, seeing her so desirable in her passionate rage ... but his rational mind imposed to his feelings and desires.
"With all due respect, ma'am ... that's something you can not demand of me ... I think tomorrow we'll see everything more clearly ... obfuscation is not a good adviser, ma'am," said Lord Melbourne seriously, trying to appear cold and equanimity.
Victoria saw him, surprised and frustrated, realizing that he was not going to give in.
"I thank you for protecting me, Lord Melbourne, and also for giving me an important lesson ... that men are the most pathetically stupid beings that God has placed in the world to torment us women! " Victoria exclaimed, disappointed and furious, and turned her back on Lord Melbourne, and she away from him.
Lord Melbourne sighed and raised his head to see the ceiling, feeling that the end of the night could not have been more disastrous ...
Not long after, Victoria was in her bedroom, preparing to sleep with the help of Miss Skerrett.
Skerrett was nervous and acting cautiously, for she had never seen the Queen so angry and upset, as if something terrible had happened to her that night. The Queen usually used to be charming to most people, including Miss Skerrett, whom she treated with great kindness and confidence to be a servant, even sometimes almost as a friend. But when she was in a bad mood, Victoria could be very intimidating to those around her, especially to the servants, and Skerrett felt uncomfortable because nothing in her education and experience in life had prepared her to deal with the tantrums of a Queen.
"Where did you tell me that Lehzen was!" Victoria exclaimed with a demanding and moody tone.
"Your Majesty ... the Baroness is still sick ... her flu is very strong, ma'am," said Skerrett who was standing behind Victoria, who was sitting in front of the dressers furniture, while Skerrett was dedicated to finish undoing the hairstyle and the arrangement that had made in the Queen's hair.
Victoria turned to see Skerrett with a worried expression, because even if at that moment her mind was absorbed in the events of the night, she could not stop worrying about the woman who had been more a mother to her than her own mother.
"But ... she's very bad? ... Is it worrying?" Victoria asked with anguish in her voice.
"No ... no, Your Majesty ... as you ordered in the afternoon, Her Majesty's doctor visited her and examined her thoroughly ... The doctor told her that it was not something very serious, but that she should rest a lot for a few days, so that it does not get complicated ... He demanded that she stay in bed, well warm, and take her medication ... the Baroness was not very happy, ma'am," said Miss Skerrett and saying the last words, Victoria could not help but smile imagining the anger of her former governess and Skerrett also smiled shyly, "But as she is coughing loudly and with some frequency, she chose not to disturb Your Majesty ... she does not want to disturb your sleep, and that is why tonight she will not sleep in the bedroom annexed yours, ma'am. But since the Baroness did not want that you did not have at your disposal someone who could take care of you and attend you at any time of the night, she ordered to me to sleep in her bedroom tonight, ma'am," Skerrett added.
"Poor Lehzen ... always thinking about my well-being. If it was not so late, I'd go visit her in the bedroom where she sleeps, but I'll do it tomorrow before I start my daily duties ... I hope the Baroness's bed is not uncomfortable for you, Skerrett," Victoria replied.
"No, ma'am, of course not," replied Skerrett.
"And do not worry about me ... I'm very capable of finding my chamber pot all by myself, although Lehzen thinks I'm still a little girl ... But yes, there's something ... I need you to go to the kitchen and bring me before you retire to Lehzen's bedroom a bottle of champagne and a glass," said Victoria.
"A bottle of champagne, ma'am?" Skerrett asked a little surprised.
"Yes ... is there a problem with that, Skerrett?" Victoria asked and her bad mood returned, seeing Skerrett with some anger.
"No, of course not, Your Majesty!" Skerrett replied a little nervous.
A while later, with Victoria already ready to go to bed, Miss Skerrett asked permission to go and get the bottle of champagne.
"Skerrett ... out of curiosity ... do not you know if Lord Melbourne has already retired to his bedroom?" Victoria asked without being able to hide her anxiety and anger.
"Yes, ma'am ... before coming to your bedroom I met young Brodie and him carried a bottle of whiskey for Lord Melbourne to his bedroom," Skerrett replied.
"I hope he drowns in his whiskey!" Victoria said in a whisper.
"Excuse me, ma'am ... did you say anything to me?" Skerrett said, she had not listened well.
"No, nothing ... you can go find that bottle, Skerrett," Victoria replied.
"With your permission, Your Majesty," said Skerrett, and with a bow she left.
Meanwhile, in his bedroom at the Palace, Lord Melbourne was reclining on the bed, in a half-sitting position. He drank, with the bottle of whiskey in one hand and a glass in the other hand, pouring himself one drink after another. He was dressed in a nightshirt and long underpants, well wrapped under the sheets and blankets. His face was serious and reflected a certain restlessness and frustration.
"Damn it! ... Damned Conroy! ... I'm a damned stupid!" exclaimed Lord Melbourne frustrated, cursing all the causes of the night's disaster, including himself.
Lord Melbourne feared how the events of the night would affect his relationship with Victoria, and he felt guilty for letting his feelings for her come out with the kiss. Now they would have to rebuild their relationship, but it would never be the same, and what he feared most was that their relationship would deteriorate so much after that, that in the end he would have to resign, because although he knew that this moment would come, he did not want it to be so soon, because I could not stand being away from her ... On the other hand, he felt miserable and like a scoundrel, because whenever he remembered the kiss of both, he felt the hot desire that arose from his heart and his entrails, that desire to have taken her and would made love to her ... and that desire manifested itself in an erection ...
That's why Lord Melbourne decided that he would drink until he would was unconscious, until he would fell asleep in bed, not caring that the next day he got up too late or could not even get out of bed ... he was going to anesthetize his anguish with alcohol.
Meanwhile, in her own bedroom Victoria was dedicated to doing something similar ...
After Skerrett brought her the bottle, Victoria drank one glass after another. She was so upset by the events of the night, that she needed to drink to try to ease her nerves and her frustration.
When Lord Melbourne acted as her fairytale prince (running to the rescue of his beloved her in distress) and subsequently reciprocated her kiss, for a brief moment Victoria felt the happiest person in the Universe ... but then he ruined her happiness with his damned scruples.
She would have done literally anything to show him her love and gratitude, she was willing to give herself to him as if it were a gift ... but he rejected her for his damn sense of duty, for an idiot ...
Victoria preferred to drink than to spend the night crying, because she was tired of crying, pouting like a little girl, and she preferred to do what grownups did ... drink to forget her sorrows.
Soon Victoria saw that her mind was dull with the effects of champagne, and that she could feel the pain and rage becoming less strong and more digestible. And she started talking to her confidant: her dog Dash ...
"Why that idiot Lord M is so stupid, Dash! ... Why do not he forget for a moment that I am the Queen and him the Prime Minister! After all, we are also people of flesh and blood ... we have feelings ... and desires ... And I know that he loves me and desires me! I'm an inexperienced girl, but I know ... by the way he kissed me ..." Victoria said lying face down, on her bed, with one leg bent with her foot raised, and with her head resting on the bottom of the bed, where she put her feet when she slept ... she saw Dash who was lying on the floor in front of her, him watching her carefully, "He just had to be honest and a little braver with me ... recognize that he loved me but that his duty was to stay away from me ... I would have been happy just to hear him say 'I love you' ... But he did not! ... Damn fool! ... I hate him!"
Victoria punched the mattress and buried her face in it ... but after a moment she raised her head and saw Dash again.
"Who I intend to cheat! I do not hate him, I love him ... if you had seen how handsome and virile he looked when he saved me from the clutches of that Conroy bastard! ... My heart was pounding when he confronted Conroy, like a damsel in a romantic novel who suffers when the man she loves confronts the villain to defend her ..." Victoria said with a sigh, "I would have gladly given myself to him to do with me what he wanted! ... Because I want it too, Dashy! Although I do not know what happens between men and women in privacy, and I only have suspicions ... I am sure that whatever it is, with him, it must be the most pleasant and beautiful in world ... How I would like to be his wife Dashy! And discover with him the secrets that the Wedding Night has for a girl like me, an innocent maiden ... How I hate this situation! ... How I hate that because I am the Queen, he can not express his love!"
Victoria cried a little and pouted, causing Dash to raise his head and see her carefully. The dog came and jumped into the bed, and Victoria hugged him while dog licked to her face.
"I'm afraid he never would wants to be with me ... I'm afraid he'll renounces our love and leave my life some day, for his damn sense of duty ... I do not want to live without him!" Victoria said sadly, pouting, while the dog kept licking her face, "You the dogs are happier ... you do not have the problems and complications that humans have ... surely if you like a female dog, you go and love her without problems ... right, Dashy? You all are smarter and more noble than people ... you do not allow foolish things like traditions, duty and a Crown to get in the way of love ... At this moment I do not want to be human, I would like to be a dog, to have my loved with me," Victoria added embracing the dog and kissing him.
Victoria was silent for a moment, and suddenly she raised her head, with an expression on her face as if she would make a great discovery. And then a big smile of genuine joy emerged between her lips ...
"Maybe it's not so difficult after all, Dashy!" exclaimed Victoria enthusiastically.
Meanwhile, in Baroness Lehzen's bedroom, Miss Skerrett had fallen asleep in her boss's bed. Although it had been a bit difficult to get to sleep, Skerrett had finally been overcome by fatigue. It had been a day of frenetic activity, with the New Year's Eve party. If, Skerrett would have been told a few years ago that she would be on New Year's Eve at the Palace of Queen, and even more so, sleeping in a bedroom annexed to the Queen's bedroom, a few steps from the bed where the reigning Monarch of country slept, surely she would have laughed out loud. But she had carved a path out of the most horrible and poorest slums of London to become the most trusted employee of the young Queen after Baroness Lehzen ... and Lehzen was more than an employee, she was practically the adoptive mother of the Queen, so Skerrett's position on Victoria's confidence scale was even more worthy of pride.
That's why Skerrett felt satisfied, despite how strenuous her job could be at times, to keep impeccable a Queen who was just out of adolescence and always wanted to look fashionable. That night Skerrett slept ready to get up early to wake up the Queen (something that Baroness Skerrett normally did) and then help her clean up and get dressed (something she did every day).
Skerrett slept until she felt someone shake her gently, and at first she thought it was a dream, perhaps one of her frequent and pleasant dreams with Mr. Francatelli, the Palace cook ... but as the jolts became more insistent, the sensation of physical reality was making its way through her heavy sleep. Skerrett half-opened her eyes, and noticed that there was a dim light in the bedroom, and then the image of someone's face began to appear in front of her still blurred view. And when Skerrett cleared her eyes and recognized the face, she could not help giving a small scared cry ...
"Shhh! ... Do not shout, Skerrett! ..." Victoria exclaimed, taking a finger to her own lips in order to ask her to remain silent ... Victoria was sitting on the edge of the bed and saw Miss Skerrett with a look like a little girl when she sees a friend who is going to propose it to make a mischief, "Forgive me for waking you up in this way, but there is something urgent that can not wait ... does it bother you very much, that I woke up you? " Victoria added with some concern.
Skerrett was stunned ... by the fact and by Victoria's words, even by asking if she had bothered her, something unusual for a Queen towards a maid, even if it was her favorite.
"No, of course not, Your Majesty," Skerrett replied, sitting up a little on the bed, sitting with her back against the headboard and covering herself better with the savannah out of modesty in front of the Queen, "I'm always at your service, Ma'am."
"Magnificent!" exclaimed Victoria in an exaggeratedly enthusiastic and with a childish smile, and Skerrett noticed the alcoholic breath emanating from the Queen, "Because I need your help, Skerrett."
"At your service, Majesty," Skerrett said helpfully, but deep down she felt a little nervous and suspicious.
"Skerrett ... I know that you, the servants of the Palace, use those service passageways to go quickly and discreetly from one bedroom to another and to any room in the Palace ... obviously you know all the passages of the Palace, or at least of dormitory wings, right? " Victoria said.
"Yes, of course ... I know the passageways well, to carry out my job, ma'am," replied Skerrett, increasingly disconcerted and uneasy.
"Perfect! ... Skerrett, I need you to guide me through the passageways ... I need you to take me right now to a place in the Palace," Victoria replied enthusiastically.
"A place in the Palace ... now? ... Ma'am, if you allow me, I can ask ... what place? " Skerrett asked, afraid of the answer.
"Well, it's ... it's ... the bedroom where Lord Melbourne sleeps," Victoria answered turning red as a tomato and lowering her eyes a bit embarrassed, but with a smile.
Skerrett opened her mouth and her face covered with a gesture of surprise and fear ... and she thought she was in trouble.