Oh no, here it comes again. I rushed out the backstage door right to the spot where I knew to be a puke bucket. It was the second time I had used this notorious puke bucket. It was an exceedingly hot day for London. It was so hot you could even smell the heat, could smell the sunbeams spread across your body. However over the stench of the sick bucket there was nothing to smell but exactly that.
This wasn't supposed to be happening. I am a professional, and professionals don't do this. This is my first show at the globe theater. I've been practicing this play for months. I've been perfect every single run-through. I have nothing to worry about, but the stink that I am breathing slithers into my nose and all the way up to my brain, urging anxiety to come out and play. I take four obnoxiously long breathes. In thru the nose, out through the mouth, in through the nose, out through the mouth, thats what he told me.
Jack is probably my best mate. I met him through the play- he plays Juliet and I play Romeo. We are both lead characters in Shakespeare's play Romeo and Juliet, obviously. He has been helping me with keeping my nerves. I decide that I should probably go find him before show time.
I slap my hat back on my head and adjust my collar in an organized and precise fashion. This costume is particularly itchy, but Jack says I wear it well, so I try to ignore the annoying burgundy and creame fabric. I push through the single door leading backstage. As soon as I walk in the heat hits me. There were bodies crammed together trying to get into their costumes while going over lines. It was chaotic, but it was home.
I saw Jack. He was already prepped and dressed for the part. His hair reaching down past his waist in a tightly wound braid. His dress was long and had an elegant flow to it, with intricately designed stitches. He was gorgeous.
His dress flapping as he ran up to embrace me. "Ianto, you look fantastic! Are you ready for the big premier?" he chirped. He has always been a loud and in your face sort of man, but even more so when he is excited. I apparently started to get a little green in the face because Jack handed me some water and told me it was ok to throw up again. "I'm fine. Just a bit nervous." I said taking the glass of water out of his hand. I took a swig of the water. It was warm, too bad I really could have used a cool-down.
Jack grabbed me by the shoulders and told me, "You will do fine. You will do better than fine! Its going to be a great show, you've practiced so hard and I will be there on stage with you for almost the entire time." This actually did calm me down a bit. He's always known exactly what to say to make me feel better.
I could hear the loud rumblings of the groundlings quiet down as the announcer came on stage. It was almost time. I looked at Jack one last time before heading out to my spot on the sidelines right next to the stage. Finally the time had come, I got into character and marched onto the middle of the stage. I saw the rambunctious groundlings and the proper gents and ladies and remembered how much fun it was to be on the stage. All my fears melted away and I was Romeo once again.