"Steve, where are you going?"
"I'm leaving."
"What do you mean you are leaving?"
"I can't take it anymore. I can't be apart of the initiative."
"Why?"
"You very well know why, Tony."
"Okay…"
"Okay?"
"Okay."
Steve walked back into the meeting room the next day. He had warned the initiative that he was leaving, now for the hard part, he had to tell his teammates.
"How? When? Why?" Asked Clint.
The last question resonated with Tony. Because of me. He felt like a part of him was dying inside as Steve spoke. He is leaving because of me. I wouldn't commit. I didn't appreciate him. I treated him like shit. I never told him how much he meant and how much I loved him. This is my fault and I deserve to feel like this.
Tony and Steve had been in an off and on fling for five months before Tony finally agreed to a relationship. They had been dating in secret for over half a year. Steve was so good to Tony, he made life livable. Tony repaid him by being cut off. He managed this by never professing any emotions he felt and flirting with anything that breathed so that he didn't have to commit to anyone. Tony knew it was wrong, but it had protected him his entire life. He tried so hard to be unattainable so that no one could get close enough to hurt him. Than there was Steve…
He fell in love with Steve before the fling even began. He had loved that Steve wouldn't give in to his charm and worship him. He liked being challenged. Basically Tony would be his normal cocky-asshole self and Steve would try to knock him down a peg. Their Dynamic was perfect. Well… perfect up until they needed more.
Steve had a way of making Tony want to let him in. He wanted to cry and he wanted to love and he wanted burn with passion. He wanted to be real. Tony couldn't help but be uncomfortable by this. It scared him to think that he wanted this man to love him, not wanted but needed Steve to love him. So he grew more distant and more flirty and more heartless.
Steve couldn't be with Tony anymore. No matter how much he loved him, he couldn't bear the torture of being with him. It felt like Tony was only with him for the sex, he thought that beyond his body and skills in bed that Tony didn't actually like him. He told Tony this one time and that is what caused the break up that eventually caused Steve to leave S.H.E.I.L.D.
Steve packed up all his belongings ready to leave everything of this new world that had meant something to him. It was time to go. He had already sad goodbye to everyone, everyone but Tony. He wasn't planning on seeing him again, not even for a goodbye, it was painful enough as is. Of course he had thought that at the exact moment that he and Tony collided into each other, dropping all of Steve's things.
"Oh sorry, I wasn't loo- oh shit."
"Not pleased to see me?"
Steve rolled his eyes and knelt on the floor to pick up his things. Tony joined him.
"You know… You don't have to leave."
"Yes I do."
"Why?"
That drove Steve over the edge.
"Why? WHY? I WILL TELL YOU WHY! BECAUSE I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU AND YOU COULDN'T GIVE A RATS ASS ABOUT ME! THAT IS WHY! ...You know what just forget it. It's done."
"I give a rats ass."
"Oh fuck off."
"I'm serious."
"Yeah well over the past year that we have been… doing things, you never once acknowledged me-"
"I'm sorry."
"I mean I could be fucking you into the wall right now and you wouldn't notice me, wait what? What did you say?"
"I said I am sorry."
"For what?"
"For never…"
"For never what?"
"For never letting you in, no matter how much I wanted to. For not caring for you the way you should have been. For pushing you away. For treating you like shit. For being an asshole For never telling you how much I fucking love you."
"Say that again."
"I am an asshole?"
"No, the other part."
"I love you. I always have and I always will."
Tears were coming down hard now. Steve was experiencing a flood of emotions. He was mad that Tony had done this to him. He was sad that all this hurt had come from it, for both parties. He was struck silly by the idea that Tony had loved him this entire time. But most of all there was relief, he was finally understanding the predicament they were in.
Tony saw Steve slide down to the ground with tears in his eyes and thought Fuck it, I am going to love this man for the rest of my life, I better start doing it right. With that in mind he walked over to Steve and gently pulled his face so that he was facing him. "Look at me." Tony said
Steve shook his head, his eyes shut tight. Slowly Tony began to kiss everyone of Steves tears away. "Love, look at me." Steve lifted his head a bit and looked straight at Tony, with a sad expression.
"I love you. I need you. There is no life for me without you. I want to be with you, and I want to let you in. Please say you will stay."
"For you, anything."
Tony pulled Steve into a kiss that encompassed all the pain and confusion and hope that they had felt.