Shadowkunu: This is my first poem/fanfic. Please be nice. .
Eternal Moonlight
Wandering aimlessly, I find myself atop a moonlit hill
Torn by opposing emotion, my thoughts led me here against my will.
Alone, angered and confused, I lift my empty eyes to the moon.
Sympathy was held in its glow, as remorse enveloped my heart like a cocoon.
In regret, I lift a taut fist to my chest
While becoming wrought with thoughts that needed to be put to rest.
Why was I created, what purpose do I serve?
What reason was I needed in this world?
The questions were endless, never leaving
They resonated with the pain in my heart, never ceasing
A light wind unraveled itself upon me, causing me to close my eyes
Indulging in its relaxation, the essence of you traveled to my side.
In the whispers of the wind, I heard your voice
Those alluring words you speak, passing between red lips tender and moist.
A faint smile curved my lips at the enticing thought of the look on your face
Of when I would finally bring my lips to yours and savor your sweet taste
Soon, the wind and the emotions it drew out of me were starting to fade
And on my own I could no longer elaborate on the charade
Slowly and reluctantly, I return my vision to the pale moon hung by an invisible wire
Only to witness the beautifully composed entity of my heavy heart's deepest desire
Captivated, I watched you descend from the skies with your wings spread wide
My eyes feasted on the exquisite sight of you, as in that moment, my emotions couldn't hide.
With a sparkling glint in your aquatic green eyes, you send a smile to me
At that moment, the world melted away and you were all that I could see
Yet, as soon as the enchantment nipped at my heart, I forcefully sent it away
I couldn't bear the thought of you leaving me for thinking about you in that way
Noticing my hesitance, you step close to me with curiosity swimming in your eyes
"What's the matter?" you ask "You look really deprived …"
It never ceased to amaze me how you always knew when something was wrong
It also made me wonder how I managed to attempt to hide it from you for so long
Feeling my heart ache from my heavy words, I parted my lips to speak
The sadness they held and the questions they left unanswered had already made me weak
"…My living existence… has been nothing but a tragic mystery…
I've been trying to find out who I am, but it's still not clear to me.
Even with this so-called ultimate power, I can never be whole.
Doesn't it seem illogical for a weapon to harness a soul?
To have a life worth living…it almost seems like a joke to me…
To have happiness or freedom…I'm beginning to think maybe it's not meant to be"
With a downtrodden expression, I turn to meet eyes with you
But instead, you had your back to me, and at that moment, I knew…
The burden my words carried affected you as much as it did me
You had always taken the pain deep inside, hidden so I couldn't see
"Rouge…" I call softly, almost hesitant if I should even try
My heart jumped as you turned to me with a liquidy glare in your eyes
"You just don't get it, do you…" you uttered lowly " Don't you listen?
You're more than a weapon!" you say, your eyes stern with a lucid glisten
"Rouge…" I utter, taking a step closer "I'm sorry. Look…. This is my problem…"
"Oh is it?" you retaliate "Obviously, you have trouble solving them."
Your sharp words pierced me like a rapier impaled in my heart
Unable to reply, I look away. Your words were cruel, but contributed to a great part
"Look, Shadow, I didn't come here to listen to you rant about your past
Yes, it was confusing and painful to you, but it's the future, not the past, that will last."
My spirits lifted, I abruptly face you
We both knew the words you spoke were bold and true
As if searching for something, you lightly smile to me
Placing a hand on your hip, you then lift your eyes to the sky, thoughtfully
"…You know, I recall a certain someone telling you that before.
Weapons don't have hearts like you. You're more than that…so much more…
For the last time, live the life you really want, Shadow. That's not a sin…
And if I have to tell you this again-!" "I get it", I interrupt, "You don't have to rub it in."
You stare at me for a moment, not knowing what to say
Then a smile inches your lips as you give me a tiny push "…Yeah, okay…"
As you laugh, so do I. The first laugh I've had in weeks
"You're laughing…" you say in a way that made a brush of crimson rush to my cheeks
"Yeah…" I say, slightly turning away and leading my eyes to the dark ground
"It's been a while…I almost forgot that sound…"
" …You know, it's funny…how we can just be so open, like this…"
"...You're right" I agree, eying those lips that dared me to steal a kiss.
"…Actually, I'm glad I found you here, Shadow. There's something…I want to say…
…And you had better listen up, because I'll only say it once!" I nodded. "Ok."
My eyes never left your form, as they lingered near your face
Continuing southward over your supple curves, did they trace
I watched you closely, as a sigh left from deep within you
With your eyes closed and your hands in fists, I knew your unborn words were hard on you
Slowly, your heavy lids lifted, revealing those illuminating gems that hid behind
Becoming lost in those glistening depths, I welcomed the thought of you being mine
"Shadow…the times we've had have been fun, haven't they?"
"Yes…they have…" I stated, wondering why you asked me in such a way.
Before I could say another word, your hands grabbed mine and you pulled me down
"Sit with me for a minute." you say, pulling me next to you on the ground
Feeling warmth spread across my face, I lift my eyes to the moon as a distraction
Only to be brought back to the pools of your eyes lit with a luminance of attraction
But the glimmer in those gorgeous gems quickly began to flicker and fade
As that slither of light was swallowed into the depths of the words you searched to create
"Shadow… I know how you feel about me…but you don't have to hide…
It's hard to lie about your true feelings when the truth is in your eyes…"
Not saying a word, I blankly stare at you
You knew me more than I knew myself…I couldn't lie to you
"I know…" I say, slowly touching your hand "But your feelings matter more than mine
All the times I went out to find another piece of myself, you were with me...every time
I never asked you to come with me, I never asked you to put your life in danger…
But, you always followed and willingly risked it all without any regret or anger
I do care for you, Rouge. I care for you from the very depths of my heart
But, if my feelings make you uncomfortable, then a relationship, we don't have to start
As much as I'd love to be yours, our friendship is of the most importance
I'd rather not lose you, because of a bad attempt of mine at romance…"
After taking in my words with your eyes wide, you hesitate, not knowing what to do
Feeling the same, I near closer and take your hand "Rouge…I think I love you…"
Your quivering lips try to form words as you keep your eyes glued to mine
Without realizing, I bring your hand to my lips, as my eyes indulge in yours at the same time
"Shadow…" you mutter, your alluring voice just inches above a whisper
My anticipation heightened when your eyes closed; my mind filled with the words: Kiss her
My hesitance was evident as I brushed my lips against yours
The pain that I had always held in my heart wasn't needed anymore.
Shadowkunu: Well, i tried. pleaze review and read my profile.