Overheard conversation between Cayde-6 and a Hunter in the Tower lounge:
You want to hear that story? Okay. I'll tell ya that story.
So, a couple years back, there were these two young Hunters who'd just stumbled up to the Tower a few weeks earlier. Since they were fresh and green and everything, and I was their roguish Vanguard mentor, I decided to show them around the inner system, give them a taste of what life was like as a Guardian.
We landed on the Moon, spent a few hours zipping across craters and blasting some Exiles. Then, one of the greenies, she finds this crack in the ground. We go down, and before we know it, we're in this creepy Hive sanctum, or whatnot.
Of course, a few moments later, the place's outstanding occupants noticed they had guests, so they tried to kill us. A couple of acolytes came our way, with a wizard watching from the back. No big deal. We clean up the acolytes, then take aim at the wizard. She calls over this big ugly knight, and he's all growling and trying to chop us in half. Being a wise and thoughtful leader, I decide we should retreat.
We ran. You've been down into those Hive tunnels, so you know they're all dark and maze-like. Through absolutely no fault of mine, we got lost. We stumbled into what must have been some Hive hatching bed. Gooey, throbbing eggsacks all over the floor and walls. Just our luck, they start hatching. Suddenly, there's thrall everywhere. Falling from the ceiling, jumping out of the walls. Literally couldn't turn without knocking half a dozen of them over.
The greenies died a few times, and I rezzed them (didn't die once myself of course). By now there's literally thousands of thrall, and the wizard and her mate were still watching from the back. Started to realize that we might have bit off more than a couple greenies and a courageous Vanguard could chew. We fought our way towards the far end of the cavern, where we finally found a tunnel leading upwards.
Just as we reach it though, the sea of screaming bastards parts, and the biggest damn thrall you've ever seen crawls out of the floor. Not an ogre, mind you, but a giant, twenty foot tall thrall, covered in spikes and warts and glowing like a blue sun. It was big. Bigger than that. No, bigger. REALLY big, okay?
We took that as our cue to throw all caution to the wind, and just started running. We could hear the hundreds of thrall following us. Dust rained from the ceiling as the big one stomped over its little cousins.
We ran for a while. Must have been miles. One of the greenies starts falling behind. A thrall catches his leg, and he goes down, a dozen of the things pile on top of him. I turn around and start blasting them off, but there's too many, and that big creepy dude was closing fast. I finally kill enough to drag him free, just as the big guy roars and lunges at us. The other greenie, she shouts a warning, and shoots a rocket at the ceiling.
I jumped, dragging him with me, as rocks started raining everywhere. When everything was still again, me and the one greenie were lying on the floor, covered in dust, the other standing over us, her launcher smoking. She'd collapsed the tunnel on the overgrown thrall, and its head was poking out of the rubble.
She got on his rez, which meant I was just sitting there, staring at the overgrown bugger's incandescent forehead. I think to myself, well gee, this guy looks nasty, it would probably be really bad if he got loose. So I do the obvious thing; I pop my Golden Gun, aim at the great blue bulb, and pull the trigger. There was a woosh, and everything goes white.
Next thing I know, my Ghost is rezzing me at the bottom of a giant crater. Ash and powered rock all the way to the horizon. The dam bugger blew a new hole in the side of Luna, and not a small one either. Had to be a couple miles across. Can still see it with a decent telescope too. It's the black spot next to Tycho.
So we got back to the Tower, and Zavala started chewing me out for taking two new Guardians on an unauthorized expedition, blah blah blah. Then I tell him about the giant thrall, and all the color drained from his face. He immediately turns around and orders two Titans and three Warlocks to go search the crater.
They spent a couple days sifting through the dust. Never did figure out what happened to that wizard and knight. I hope the blast got them, because if they're still out there, cooking up more of those oversized thrall, let me tell you, we are screwed.
Actually, this reminds me of that one time I cracked open a Seeder down in Havana. Did I ever tell you that one? Oh boy, now that is a good story. You see, there was this witch...