Kelly POV
Three little words, that's all that I've got. Three little words, like it or not.
Tell me she noticed or that she's heard. For Fritton I'd run to the ends of the Earth and back simply because she asked me to, nobody had me wrapped round their little finger the way Annabelle has. But there's a little problem, well a big problem. I couldn't keep her, the only thing I could keep was the promises that I made to her. The pang of hurt I get when I think of how I lost her is the most beautiful pain in the world. I love how it hurts.
I haven't cried since I left after all I was the one to finish it, why should she wait for me while I go jetting off around the world? It wouldn't have been fair on her and the dangers she would've been in by just being involved with me were too great. I didn't want Belle to be thrown into the firing line. I know it hurt her, me finishing everything, but it saved her a lot of pain in the long run. I know the dangers that I face being apart of MI7, I didn't want Belle to have to face the possibility of me being away for months or dying. That would've killed her.
I didn't want to leave her but it was for the best. I can handle my own hurt, it's Annabelle hurting that I can't bare to see. She's happy now and in the arms of somebody else. Fritton isn't settled down and married, she's too independent for that life. I'm happy for Annabelle and I'm happy to help her out when she needs me. I just wish she didn't choose Roxy. She could've had any man or woman, one that wasn't so hot headed and uncaring. At least I know that Belle won't let Roxy push her about and I know that Belle will put the rocker in her place should she need to. I taught Fritton all I knew about putting people in their places. I can't help but smile to self at that little fact.
Roxy can give Belle the attention and time that I couldn't give her. But the one thing Roxy cannot give Belle is the special smile I had for her. Roxy will never be able to do that, she'll never be able to do is to give Fritton the loyalty of St Trinians. I hope Roxy takes care of my Belle, if not that she'll be dead quicker then you can say coffin. I'd have to fight off the St Trinians just so I could kill her first. To me that is a comforting thought, that information would stop any sane man from messing around with a present, previous or future St Trinian. It's why I love the school and it's students dearly.
There's no point regretting that it didn't last, life's unfair like that. It pulls you apart and stabs you in the back, life does that to everyone. No point in sulking over the time between us being cruelly cut short, the time we had was like sand in our hands. But. Now this is a very big but. When I look behind at the past, I'm so glad that I had the chance to say that Belle was mine. It was never a dull moment when we were together making chaos in the true St Trinian way. I just wish that it could've been longer and that I didn't have to leave St Trinians, I could've sat in those lessons forever and still be entertained by it all.
I found out about Belle and Roxy when I bumped into Chelsea while on a mission in France. That's when I first felt the pang of hurt, she had moved on so quickly. I had to force myself to not go running back to St Trinians just to plead with her, to tell her that I had made a mistake. That would've been selfish of me to do that to her. Then she called me and asked for my help. I ditched everything, hot-wired a fast boat and sped back to her, just like I had promised. Where Annabelle Fritton is concerned nothing else matters. I would always be there to help her through even if it hurt me in the process.
I've been trying to fix all the gaps that loosing Annabelle has left, I've been rebuilding the wall just so she can come and knock it down again. I let her break it down again and again. It may make me lose my mind but I pretend that I'm fine just so it doesn't affect her. I make it look as if I'm keeping everything together while I crumble on the inside.
Give me a moment. Give me a chance. I'm lost in the hurt and living in the past. I couldn't keep her but I'll keep my word, I'll always be a phone call away. This pain deep inside is the most beautiful pain in the world and I love how it hurts. Annabelle is the most beautiful pain in the world. This is my journey and it isn't the end. I'll be stood waiting until she needs me again.
Three little words, that's all that I've got. Three little words, like it or not.
Not the most cheery thing I've written, but as everyone's favourite pirate who goes around pretendning to be a kiwi has pointed out it's a new side to Kelly. Guess one of the four songs used and I'll send you a preview of 'The Silent Killer'. And remember guys, where ever you go you'll be thinking about me (If you're from the land of moaning bus shelter que and you don't get that you must be living under a rock.)
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