Disclaimer: I do not own Sirius Black, unfortunately. if I was JKR Sirius would never have died.
The days and months and years
Slowly and inexorably pass,
Leaving me sinking deeper
In despair and recrimination.
Twelve years is a long time
For one's worst nightmares to replay themselves,
and in this place I cannot escape
My thoughts, my fears and failures.
The cold seeps through me
To touch my very soul,
Draining all my happy thoughts,
Taking away my dreams.
Making me remember that disasterous decision
To make Pettigrew the secret keeper,
not knowing that he would run to voldemort
To betray the friends who trusted him.
I think of James and Lily
And my heart aches with sadness
And regret for my stupidity
In trusting the wrong person.
I think about Harry
And wonder where he is now,
And I think about moony
And wonder if he hates me.
Only two things keep me sane,
And give me reason to hold on;
My love and concern for my Godson
And my desire for revenge on that traitorous rat.
Day after day passes without change,
Filled with the cries of the hopeless;
Those whom the dementors have driven insane
By draining all vestiges of light and hope.
I escape into Padfoot's form
To find temporary relief;
If I didn't have this way of hiding myself
I would be as crazy as the rest of them.
And I know I'll find a way
To leave this place behind;
To be a part of Harry's life
And tell my true story.f
A/N: thanks for reading, please let me know what you think.