Broken Vows, Broken Promises

A/N – Okay, so here's the obligatory preface. I don't own these characters, Bioware does. I'm just slightly obsessed with them. I haven't seen many full-length DA2 Cullen stories, so I thought I'd try my hand at one. I'll try juggling this and my DA:O story through the summer. Let me know what you all think! Rating likely to change later on.

Summary – She was a rogue; he was a warrior. He came to Kirkwall running away from a past that haunted him; she came to find a better life for her family. They were wrong for each other, so why does it feel so right? F/Hawke – Cullen – Fenris triangle.

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Sophia Hawke sat on the steps of the docks, staring out over the calm waters at the gloomy silhouette of the Gallows as it loomed just across the harbor. The sun was just beginning to disappear behind the mountains that circled the city, casting their long shadows over the whole Kirkwall. Sophia often came here at twilight to be alone with her thoughts as she stared out at the prison that had housed her sister for the better part of the last two years. The more reasonable part of her mind liked to remind her just how dangerous the docks could be at night; after all, she had made a good deal of coin over the years killing the groups of bandits that prowled the streets. The smug part of her mind took comfort in the twin blades strapped to her back, sure that she could take care of anything that crawled out of the shadows; besides, she worked best in the dark, moving unseen through the back ways of the city. She was probably safer at night than she was in broad daylight. At least at night, no one knew who she was; in the day, everyone recognized her thanks to her recent good fortune. That was probably why she found the moments just before dark soothing and in many ways almost peaceful. During this time of the day, the dock workers had all gone home, and the thugs hadn't crawled up from the holes in which they hid during the day. She could be alone with her thoughts, if only for a little while.

It had been almost two years since the templars had come and taken away her sister, and in those two years, she had never gotten up the nerve to board a boat and cross that harbor to visit her. Two years since she last saw Bethany's sweet face; two years, and she still hadn't recovered from the guilt that plagued her. Her mother often went to the Gallows, as often as the templars allowed, in fact, but Sophia never did. She simply couldn't bring herself to do it. Sitting there, staring out at the darkening towers of the massive prison, Sophia tried, for the thousandth time, to try to reason out why. It wasn't just that she felt guilty for allowing her sister to be taken, though she did, immensely so. There many nights as she would stare out across the harbor that she would allow herself to wonder what would have happened if she had just taken Bethany into the deep roads instead of Anders. Bethany had wanted so desperately to join her; it would have been easy to allow Anders to stay behind to tend to his clinic. However, Sophia wanted the edge Anders' Grey abilities as a Grey Warden would provide, so, as always, her pragmatism won out over her heart. She wasn't thinking about protecting her sister or appeasing her mother; it was about tactics, not emotion, just plain and simple tactics. So in the end, Anders had joined them on expedition while Bethany stayed behind, and because she stayed in Kirkwall, she was discovered and forced into the tower. However, Sophia knew better than to allow herself to venture down that line of thoughts as it would undoubtedly lead to regrets, regrets she could ill afford at the moment. What's done was done, and second-guessing herself wouldn't solve anything, and it certainly wouldn't rid her of her guilt.

However strong her guilt was, though, it wasn't the main emotion that was keeping her from visiting the Gallows. No, it was shame – shame that one some level, she agreed with what the templars were doing. Sophia knew that they had every right to take her sister in; Bethany was an apostate after all, and apostates were causing major problems all over the city. That wasn't to say she agreed with what the templars were doing to mages in the Gallows, but she wasn't blind to the apostate problem either. Sophia was also ashamed that on some level, she was grateful that her sister was in the Gallows and that protecting her was no longer Sophia's responsibility. Shame that she hoped her sister's induction to the Circle of Magi might finally give her and her mother a chance at the normal life. No more living in fear that the templars might barge into their home in the middle of the night, no more sneaking around the chantry for fear that they may be spotted; finally, she and her mother could live like normal people. Those were the feelings that upset Sophia worst of all because it made her feel like a selfish, heartless woman.

The fact that some part of her took even the slightest bit of joy in a situation that made her sister miserable was sickening to Sophia. She loved Bethany with all her heart, but in a way, she had always resented her little sister and the life that they had been forced to lead due to her magical abilities. Sophia hated a life of dodging templars, moving on a moment's notice, never making any friends because they couldn't trust anyone outside the family. Sophia knew it wasn't Bethany's fault, but that didn't stop the resentment from taking root in her teenage heart. Hide Bethany, protect Bethany, don't do that, it won't be good for Bethany; it was exhausting. In the end, it was why she and Carver joined the King's army in Ostagar once they were both of age. It wasn't to protect her homeland; it was to escape from the bitterness that was growing inside her.

It was worse for Carver in a lot of ways. At least Sophia had the benefit of being the eldest and the head of the family after their father died. He felt that she had taken his place as the man of the house, never mind the fact that he had been a mere lad of 12 when the templars killed their father. If that wasn't enough, he felt that both their parents loved Bethany the most because they both seemed to dote on her constantly. She was Father's little mage and Mother's little princess, leaving Carver was overlooked on all sides. It had turned him into a bitter, hard-hearted young man who distanced himself from the whole family. Try as she might, Sophia had never been able to bridge the gap that had grown between them. She had hoped that fighting side by side in the Cailain's army would bring them together, but it had only succeeded driving them further apart as Sophia's unique talents as a rogue and her good looks made her well liked and respected among the King's soldiers. Carver, who was just another sword-bearing warrior, was once again over-looked in favor of his more talented sister.

Sighing, Sophia leaned forward on her knees as she continued to stare out over the Gallows, dreading the eventual walk home. Things hadn't improved the way she had hoped they would. Now, the great divide wasn't just between Sophia and her siblings, but it was between her and her mother as well. Leandra always blamed her for Carver's death, and Bethany's capture only made things worse between them, as her mother placed the blame for that squarely on Sophia's shoulders as well. Their relationship had become so strained of late that Sophia wondered if there was ever any hope of fixing it at all. Buying the mansion in Hightown had helped soften her mother a bit, but Sophia could still see the disappointment in Leandra's eyes every time she looked at her. It had gotten to the point that Sophia couldn't stand to be in the house, so she chose to seek the solitude of the docks rather than endure her mother's cold silence.

Sophia glanced around; night was beginning to fall in earnest around her. She was about to get up and head toward the Hanged Man when she noticed a figure moving toward her in the shadows. Trying to be discreet, she let her hand slide down her leg and began to feel for the dagger that was tucked away in her boot, her fingers itching to reach for the twin blades strapped to her back, but she knew going for them would give her away, resulting in an immediate attack from her stalker. She would only have a few moments to catch this guy before he realized he had been seen. She continued to track his movements, giving the mabari that was sleeping at her feet a quick nudge to warn him of the possible fight. Mathus gave a soft woof as he lifted his massive head and looked around. She had stayed out a bit longer than she had intended to, and now, she would likely have to fight her way out until she made it to the relative safety of the shadows. From the corner of her eye, she watched as the shadow moved closer. It was a man, obviously, dressed in casual clothing but there was a large sword hanging down at this side. She would have to disarm him and dispatch him quickly and hope that he was alone, one man she could handle. She was about to strike when he stepped into the moonlight, and she recognized his face.

"Knight-Captain, Cullen," she said, taking her hand off the hilt of her dagger and giving him a small nod of recognition.

The red-headed templar smiled as he walked over to her. "Lady Hawke," he said as he smiled down at her, "or should I call you Lady Sophia Amell Hawke, proud Scion of the Amell family."

"I guess you could call me that, just don't expect me to answer to it," she said chuckling. "It's just Hawke; at least that's what all my friends call me."

"Just Hawke it is then, and you can just call me Cullen, at least you can when I'm out of my armor. Do you mind if I join you?" he asked.

"It's a free city," Sophia said, gesturing to the step beside her. "For some of us at least," she muttered to herself, glancing over at the templar, a bit puzzled at his presence. She examined him for a moment, trying to figure him out, before turning her gaze back toward the Gallows. "So, what brings you to the mainland without all that heavy armor you usually wear? You're not on some secret mission are you, tracking down dangerous apostates, protecting virgins and kittens, or whatever else you templars do?"

Cullen chucked, "No, nothing as interesting as that, I'm afraid. I'm just on a break of sorts. The Knight-Commander thinks it's a good idea for us to get away from the Gallows every now and then so that we don't get burned out." Hawke glanced over at him, an eyebrow raised. "Oh, believe me; the irony of what I just said is not lost on me. There are many, I'm sure, who would like a break from the Gallows, but in the Commander's defense, I can't freeze people solid with my hands."

"No, but you can cleave someone's head from their shoulders in a single blow. I've seen you do it."

"You do have a point there, but so can you."

Hawke laughed, "I'm not so sure I can do that. I'm more of a sneak up behind them and slit their throat kind of girl; it takes a lot of strength to perform a feat like that. That being said, you really should be more careful about sneaking up on people in the dark, especially people like me; you startle me and you might just lose something important."

Cullen laughed. "Hopefully, I'd be quick enough to block you before I lost anything truly vital. I suppose could say the same about sitting alone out here in the dark, but I guess you're more than capable of taking care of yourself, at least based on what I've seen." He glanced toward the Gallows for a moment before turning his attention back toward her. "So what brings you out here? You're not scouting the Gallows for weaknesses, formulating some kind of escape plan or anything; are you?"

Sophia chuckled, "No, nothing like that. All though, if I was planning on breaking Bethany out, the Knight-Captain is probably the last person I would tell."

"I guess that's true, so what are you doing here then?"

"I just like to come out here and think, that's all. It's quiet; it helps me feel close to my sister, somehow. Besides, breaking Bethany out would just be a futile effort now, right? You guys have a phylactery on her, so you'd be able to track her down quite easily." She leaned back, resting her elbows on the stair behind her. "Keeping her abilities a secret was one thing. Back then, we weren't actively running from the circle, so it wasn't nearly as dangerous. If I broke her out now, it would make us hunted criminals, and there's no way I'd put my mother in that kind of danger." Hawke shook her head and looked up at him. "You know, I had planned to move us out of the city altogether once I got back from the expedition. I thought it would be safer for all of us."

"So, why did you stay?"

"Once you and your men took Bethany, there was really no point to hiding anymore. Besides, it was always her dream to reclaim the estate for our mother; I guess I felt that I owed it to her to see her dreams come true, that one at the very least."

Cullen was quiet for a moment, and Sophia could tell he was mulling over something. "Look, Hawke, I just wanted you to know, I kept my promise to you. I wasn't the one who turned her in. I mean…I know I was there when we took her in, but Meredith didn't find out about her through me."

Hawke glanced over at him. "Really?" Her eyes narrowed, "Why are you telling me this?"

"Well, I always felt bad about being there when she was taken into custody after I promised you to look the other way when it came to Bethany. I mean, I felt that I owed it to you two after everything you did to help us with the Wilmond thing a while back. You did a lot to help the templars back then; it seemed only fair to look the other way. Besides, Bethany didn't seem like she was a danger."

"A fat lot of good that did for me," she muttered to herself. "So how did the rest of the order find out about her?"

"While you were gone, Bethany healed a little boy in Lowtown. He had fallen and broken his leg pretty badly, and your sister happened to be there."

"So she healed him?" Cullen nodded, and Hawke rolled her eyes, "Of course she healed him. That's so something Bethany would do. Let me guess, there were some city guards or templars nearby who witnessed the whole thing."

Cullen shook his head, "You know, I almost wish it was that. It was the boy's mother." Sophia turned and glanced up at him, her eyes wide with surprise.

"His mother? After Bethany saved him his mother turned her in?"

Cullen nodded. "She was a poor refugee and needed the money she would get from the reward. No good deed goes un punished, huh?"

Sophia sighed and shook her head. "You know, I wish I could say this surprises me, but it doesn't. The only thing that really did surprise me is that it took someone that long to turn on her. She helped dozens of people; I guess it was only a matter of time. I wonder what took them so long to turn on her."

"If I was to water a guess, I'd say it was you."

"Me?"

"Yeah, you. Who in their right minds would knowingly cross you? I remember the way you looked at me when I realized Bethany was a mage. like you were going to tear my heart out if I tried anything. You can be downright scary, you know?"

Sophia sighed, "So since I wasn't there to intimidate her, the mother turned on her? Well doesn't that do wonders for my guilt?" The templar turned and gave her a funny look. "Never mind, you interrupted my self-loathing about letting her be captured only to provide me with more ammunition. Thanks for that."

"I'm s..sorry," he stuttered as he scrambled to his feet. "I really didn't mean…I didn't know…"

"Ah, it's fine, no one really knows; it's not exactly something I talk about. Speaking of which, I have no idea why I'm unloading on you all of a sudden. Maybe because you're a templar, the nearest other target for my frustrations, I don't know."

"Is that why you haven't been to the Gallows to see her; you've felt guilty?"

Sophia glanced up at him, a bit surprised. A knowing grin crossed her face. "You've noticed that I haven't been to the Gallows? Why ser templar, I do believe you've been keeping tabs on me."

She could see a blush beginning to creep up his neck. "Um, well, not exactly, I mean, yes, in a way. We were just told to keep an eye out for you in case you tried any, you know, ill-advised prison breaks."

Hawke snorted. "Well, don't you know how to stoke a girl's ego? First you make me feel guilty, then almost cheer me up by suggesting you've been looking for me only to point out that you did so only because your boss told you to. Why, my heart's all aflutter."

Sophia glanced over at him and nearly burst out laughing at the sight of his scarlet face. He was a handsome man, even when he was beet red, and in truth, she had actually thought about him several times since she and her party had returned from their expedition. Back before they left for the deep roads, Sophia had always made it a point to talk to the captain whenever their business brought them into the Gallows. She had always told herself it was because she enjoyed hearing someone speak with a Ferelden accent that wasn't tinged with a hint of bitterness, but that was a lie she liked to tell herself. She was a fugitive, hiding her apostate sister from the Chantry, so there was no way she would admit, even to herself, that she found the Knight-Captain even remotely attractive. Not back then, anyway, and now, well too much had happened now.

"Well, since I've thoroughly insulted you, then allow me to do the gentlemanly thing and make amends," the templar said once he managed to get his blushing under control. "I came over to the city to have a few drinks, and I would be honored if you would join me. It is the least I can do."

Sophia thought about it for a moment. "Did you have any place in particular in mind?"

Cullen shrugged, "Not really. I can't say that I'm all that familiar with the taverns around here."

"Well I am, so I accept your offer on one condition. I get to name the place."

"That sounds reasonable," he said, extending a hand to help her to her feet. "So, where are we headed?"

"The Hanged Man, the ale tastes like horse piss and the whiskey is usually watered down, but you can't beat the company anywhere in Kirkwall."

"Ummm, sounds appealing," Cullen said with a grin. He extended his arm to her, and with a smile, she took it. "Lead the way, My Lady."