So I should be working on one of my other stories but instead I decide to do this because I freaking love River and the doctor. Plus I had some feels left over from The Name Of The doctor.
Note: The song She's Always a Woman to Me does exist even though as far I know The doctor didn't write it. I just think the song matches River's personality. I highly recommend it.
There was one thing the doctor loved more than his bowties. That was holding hands especially when he was running which was basically all the time. It wasn't even romantic most of the time like with Martha and Donna even though it did start with Rose who he loved and he still loved to some degree. Holding hands to him most of the time was just a way of reassuring himself that he hasn't lost them or gotten them killed yet. It was also his way of saying you are important to me. Holding hands with River was different, the two times he was able to do it. It could be any number or reasons. It could be because she was his wife. It could also be because he was never sure when he would see her again and wanted to make every moment last. He just got this wonderful feeling while he was holding her hand that made him never want to let go.
River however wasn't particularly fond of holding hands especially when they were running.
"It's hard to shoot a gun with only one hand sweetie." She explained to him one day when he asked her about it. "It's nothing personal."
"You don't have to shoot things." He said even though he knew trying to get her to do anything that she didn't want to do was impossible.
"Sweetie, asking me to shoot anything is like asking you not to wear bowties." She replied
She was right. Of course she was. She was always right.
He tried not to take it personally. He really tried. It just hurt him when he would reach out to her and she would ignore it. He tried to use reason to make him feel better. She just like to shoot things you know that. You've always known that he told himself. It wasn't just when they were fighting daleks and things like that. It was also when he took her to romantic places like a planet made entirely out of cotton candy because he knew how much she loved that stuff or that time when he had Billy Joel come to Paris to perform a song that he wrote specifically called She's always a woman to me.
He reached out to hold her hand thinking that maybe now that she wouldn't ignore his empty hand. He pretended not to notice or care. Though he couldn't help but wonder why. It couldn't be because she didn't like to be physical or intimate because after they technically got married. They had quite the honeymoon if you know what I mean.
After a while of pretending not to care. The doctor just snapped and asked her point blank why she didn't like holding hands.
"I told you it's hard to shoot a gun with one hand." she reminded him
"I understand that but you don't want to do it when I do romantic things for you." He said "Like that time in Paris."
"Why is so important that I hold hands with you?"
He took a deep breath so he didn't start crying "Because I've lost so many people. So many people that I cared about and I know that I lose you. I just need sometimes that you are here with me right now."
"Oh Sweetie." She said as she close the space between them. She interlaced their hands together once she was close enough. "This good?"
"This is perfect." He said as he glided his lips over hers.
And in that moment she agreed with him.