Chapter one

With a stretch, I stand. Making my mouth move in a dead motion, I yawn. It's been two years, two years since he left, and this body has felt nothing but dead. Grabbing my new black bag, I slip it over my shoulder and call for my little me's.

"Ran, Miki, Sue!" I get no response. With a horrid gasp, I remember that they're gone. Having thought I was grown up, they had left me, just like everything else. Ikuto, Tadase, Utau, Nadshiko; who's apparently Nedeshiko in some messed up form, all the guardians; they all left me.

I knew they would, it wasn't impossible to guess. How couldn't they? They thought me as a bad omen, always in danger, and every time I needed their help, they had always came, until they got sick of it.

Skipping school is regular for me, and it disappointed my parents, oh how I knew that they would soon leave me too. They all did.

"Amu, time to leave." But mother's too late; I'm out the window and on the roof. Something I had picked up from Ikuto, apparently.

"Amu." My mother see's me, but I couldn't care less. "That boy, he's done this to you."

Oh, how she accuses him. Doesn't she see that it's everyone doing this to me? I'm slowly breaking, if I'm not already broken. Sure, Ikuto started it, but there's no need to rub it in, especially now that your part of the lot that continues it.

Ignoring her, I make my way around the bend of the roof and jump the fence. I run the rest of the way, not thinking about where I'm going.

Slowly, almost agonizingly, I drop to my knees in a fit of sobs.

At this point, I notice where I am. The amusement park. Why is it, that when something doesn't turn out the way I plan, that this is the place I find myself? This place will leave me too, it's bound too.

Turning on the electricity, I sit in the blue teacup, and let it spin as fast as it can. Trying to make my thoughts and worries and pain fly from my head, body and soul. Sure, my skin whipped fast into my bones, and it brought up my adrenaline, but it never quite did its job. It just made me extremely... dizzy.

I bring my legs to my stomach, holding them close to my chest as I put my head on them and cover my head with my hands. Single tears leak from my eyes, and I make no noise.

Something thumped, but I payed no attention to it.

"... Went to the school, they said you hardly attend. I thought I wouldn't find you, so I just stood it out, and came here, and it seems to be my luck, because here you are." Someone spokes. The tears didn't subside; instead they seem to grow faster. Now I'm hearing his voice, how pathetic.

"Amu? Are you listening?" The voice injects. "Hello?"

Something shakes my shoulder, and I ignore it, it's probably just my own sobbing, or a bird, anything really, but it wouldn't be him. He's gone, I can accept that. I think.

"Amu." The sound of Yoru yells in my thoughts, a happy sound. "Amu-chan?"

Yoru's voice is worried now, oh, he'll leave me too, just like the rest, even if I did help him, he wouldn't care.

"Where's Ran, Miki, Sue?" He mutters. I feel the shaking, except this time, it's much more urgent.

"Amu, look at me." His voice is so alluring, I just want to listen to it, but nothing works out right.

"I don't want this dream, I just want to wake up." Oh, so I now think this is a dream? How strange. I look up. My cheeks and eyes are brimming with tears and water streaks.

Ikuto sits in front of me; on the metal railing I'm supposed to be holding onto, his left leg brushing mine, the right now tucked under his chin on the metal railing, one hand on my shoulder, the other gripping onto his leg on the railing. His expression comes from one of worry to one of shock.

"Amu." He breathes. The tears pour faster.

"I just want to wake up."