Author's Note: I have no idea what this is or how to explain it. It's very messy and a result of imminent boredom. May or may not continue, we shall see. :) Takes place somewhere after season 2 ends but somehow everyone is getting along.
Disclaimer: don't own any of these characters and what not.
It all starts one night.
Actually, he's not completely sure how it starts.
They are all incredibly drunk, sitting in a circle on the floor of Blair's bedroom.
Somehow graduation has forced them to put all of their differences aside and be friends (substitute friends for a synonym that is much more mild.)
Dan finds it hilarious how much they love each other when two bottles of French champagne and three shots of tequila (each) are swishing around in their stomachs.
Spin the bottle is Serena's idea, which comes as no surprise to anyone.
Why is Jenny here? The question crosses Dan's mind, but he chooses to ignore it.
His sister is almost as drunk as he is. Humphreys have never been known to hold their liquor well.
"Little Humphrey, you first!" Blair squeals, clapping her hands excitedly.
He notices things he hadn't noticed about her before.
She looks really good in maroon. (or crimson, to be politically correct.)
The frosty pink gloss on her lips matches the pearl shade of nail polish adorning her delicate fingers.
Her hair has gotten significantly lighter, and longer, since the first time he saw her two years ago- on thanksgiving.
She's been damaged since then, worn down and scarred by guys who have never really known her at all.
Watching her exhale a huge puff of smoke above her head, he doesn't think he's ever seen her so care-free, alive.
Jenny spins the bottle and everyone is suddenly silent with anticipation. Before he knows it, a joint is poised at his lips and Dan takes it gratefully.
Lonely boy isn't so lonely anymore.
The Insider is finally inside.
Jenny and Kati Farkas are making out in front of him but he's too stoned and drunk to care. His eyes have already glassed over and a fuzziness is traveling throughout his entire body.
Blair's bloodshot brown eyes meet his with a daring smirk as she gives the bottle a twirl.
He doesn't know how it happens really. Blair Waldorf is crawling across the circle to crush her lips into his. He grasps a handful of chestnut curls and kisses her back, roughly, without reason. Her teeth clamp down on his bottom lip and Dan lets out a groan as she pulls away from him, grinning with satisfaction.
No one cares. Nate isn't beating him to the ground. Chuck is just laughing a very baked laugh that Dan has grown to appreciate from him.
He never wanted to be a part of this world.
He thought he was better than this, better than them.
Now he's in the queen's chambers. Maybe it's where he's always belonged.
No one is tearing him down or ripping apart his wardrobe.
He is one of them. Whatever that means.
A very small, miniscule, insignificant part of him might even feel honored.
Serena and Chuck have collapsed onto his leg, making out as though no one else is in the room. Dan didn't see that one coming. They were brother and sister at one point this year.
He can't figure out why he isn't more disturbed.
Dan looks to Blair for a reaction, but she's laying on the floor, staring at the ceiling.
Giggles pour out of her mouth and it's all he can do to crawl on hands and knees, collapsing as soon as he's next to her body.
"You seem happy." He smiles at her, although his eyes are hazy and about to close.
Blair turns onto her side to face him. Her eyes are still stained red with intoxication but he's never been more attracted to her. She lets her fingers rest on his chin as her lips curl into a gentle grin.
"When did you get so beautiful, Humphrey?"
Dan narrows his eyes at her, not sure when he stopped writing sonnets about flighty, whirlwind blondes and started writing them about snarky brunettes who only call him by his last name.
"I want to kiss you again." He says softly, propping himself up on one elbow.
"Too bad."
With that, she closes her eyes and lets out a soft moan. When Dan turns around, he realizes everyone else has left the room, probably roaming the penthouse for more alcohol.
He should be the knight in shining armor. He should really carry her to bed and find a nice couch to pass out on, but he can't muster the strength to move.
Instead, he brushes a few strands of hair out of her face and presses his lips against her temple.
"When did you get so beautiful, Waldorf?"
Dan lets out one more deep sigh before falling asleep next to the girl who makes his life absolutely and miserably perfect in the very worst way possible.