"Father," Draco Malfoy said, "Have you ever wished you were Larry Boy?"
"Who's Larry Boy?" drawled his father.
"It's Larry from Veggie Tales in disguise!"
"Hooray!" said Bellatrix, "Archibald is better, though."
"PUREBLOODS NEVER WATCH MUGGLE TELEVISION! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU STUPID BOY! WHEN DID Y'ALL BECOME A MUDBLOOD?" screeched Lord Ticklebum (previously Voldemort. aha!) He grabbed a steak knife and removed Angel's forehead from the rest of her hybrid body, angering Max. You won't like Max when she's angry.
"My dear Snakeman," began Gazzy, "When did you get that Michael Jackson-esque nose job?"
"That is, like, so last year," said Iggy. Voldemort killed them both, and Nudge kissed him.
The evil people dropped a bomb on them and everybody except Fang and Bellatrix died.