Chapter One
But where do you go to my lovely
When you're alone in your bed
Tell me the thoughts that surround you
I want to look inside your head, yes i do.
Hermione sat on the couch in the common room for Head Boy and Girl, staring blankly at a letter that had arrived so late in the night. The owl had woken her up at 2 in the morning rapping on the window in the common room. She had hurried to get it, afraid that it would wake Draco up and she wasn't in the mood to deal with another one of his tantrums. She couldn't understand what had been so urgent that it couldn't wait until the morning, but now she realized.
"Granger, I swear to god you're going to pay for this." Draco stomped into the room, with nothing more than boxers on. His hair was plastered to half of his face and his eyes were still heavy with sleep, but he somehow still managed to carry himself like he was the King of England. And he spoke like it too. "If we weren't graduating in less than two weeks I'd have switched back to the Slytherin House, six other boys aren't as bad as you." Draco stopped talking to wait for her response. Hermione could feel his eyes on her, waiting for her to snap back but nothing came out of her mouth. She could give as much as he could when it came to arguing, but this time she could barely bring herself to move her head.
She kept her eyes focused on the part of the letter addressed to her, she was scared that if she moved a muscle, even her eyes, she would lose control. She stared at her name written in her mother's script, tracing every curve.
"Granger, did you hear me?" Draco asked, but his voice had less of a bite to it.
Hermione blinked. She looked up at him, expressionless. She didn't think she could form the words she needed to express what had happened. She merely held out the letter to him.
Draco approached her, his eyes furrowed together. "What is this?" he asked as he took the letter from her. She watched as he scanned the letter, his mouth slowly dropping open, his previous aggravation disappearing into something less definable. He looked at her, not speaking.
Hermione forced herself to say the words. "He got hit by a car yesterday," she said, even though he already knew. "The funeral is going to be Thursday…" her voice came out flat and unrecognizable.
"Grang-" Draco stopped himself. "Hermione, I'm sorry." He sat down next to her slowly. "I-I'm so sorry."
Hermione nodded. Her body felt numb, she focused on anything she could to avoid thinking about what she had just found out. She traced the pattern on the carpet with her eyes, counted the lines on the table. She didn't know how long she sat there, but Draco never moved. Finally though—
"I think I'm going to be sick." Hermione closed her eyes, trying to keep the bile from her throat from rising. She felt Draco pull her up from the couch and quickly guide her into one of their rooms to the bathroom. He placed her carefully in front of the toilet and gathered her hair back as she retched. She shook violently, and Draco pulled her closer to him, rubbing her back as she emptied her stomach.
She pulled away from the porcelain bowl and Draco handed her a towel. She wiped her mouth and closed her eyes, falling into his chest. She started sobbing, the kind that rips your chest open and suffocates you all at the same time. Draco pressed her close to his chest, he was rubbing her arms, her hair anything to try and calm her down but she barely noticed. She could only think about the unavoidable truth that her father was dead.
Hermione moved slowly, feeling her surroundings. It felt like her bed, but the smell was different. She moved her arms across the sheets but it made contact with something soft and warm. There was a soft umph that issued from the thing she had hit. Not thing, person. Draco.
Hermione opened her eyes slowly and it took her a minute to remember why her eyes were so wet and puffy. Had she been crying in her sleep? The room was still dark, she couldn't have been out for that long. "What time is it?" she asked, her voice hoarse.
"Around 3:30. You've only been asleep for thirty minutes, try and go back to bed." Draco said softly. She didn't think he had ever used that tone with anyone before. It was soothing and low.
Hermione sniffed as her tears welled up again. She didn't even remember getting in bed, Draco must have put her here. She pressed her face into the pillow and tried to quiet herself.
"Hey, now. Don't start that again," Draco scooted closer to her, gently dislodging her from the pillow and pulling her into his chest. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and gently hushed her. "Everything will be okay, I promise."
Through the haze of her grief, Hermione puzzled why Draco was acting so nice to her. He was going above and beyond what she would expect from him in a situation like this. His actions were closer to a boyfriend or husband, not someone she constantly argued with. But she didn't rest on the thought long, she was too distracted to care why he was doing it, she was just grateful that he was. She wrapped an arm around his torso and intertwined their legs; she was clinging to him like he was a life preserver. He was the only thing keeping her head above water.
She drifted in and out of sleep for the rest of the night, but each time she woke up, Draco was there, either rubbing her back or telling her quietly to try and sleep more.
But eventually the morning light began to creep through the curtains and she couldn't get herself to sleep any longer. She saw her surroundings properly for the first time and realized that the décor was the green and silver of Slytherin. Hermione knew that had this happened under any other circumstance she would be in a rage and demand to know why he hadn't put her in her own bed and let her sleep by herself. But now she didn't care. She felt detached from herself, anything that had been important before last night didn't matter anymore. It didn't matter that she was in Draco's bed, what mattered was that he was there for her when she needed someone, he was the one comforting her the entire night and reassuring her that everything was going to be okay, even though she knew it was just a lie. But the lie was a nice one.
Hermione tried to gently disengage herself from Draco, they were in an intimate position for two people who barely knew each other. Well, depending on how you looked at it Hermione knew quite a lot about Draco and his family. But she had no idea what his favorite cereal was, which Quidditch team he supported, what kind of literature he read, or if he even read at all. And most of all she had no idea that he was capable of acting the way he had last night.
As she extracted herself from him he let out a low moan.
"Where do you think you're going?" he asked groggily.
"I should probably get up, it's morning."
"It's barely light out, Hermione." Draco rubbed his eyes with the hand that wasn't lodged underneath Hermione and sat up a slightly. "It's probably not even 7 yet."
"Well, you know better than anyone I like to get a head start on the day. I have a lot of things I need to take care of…"
Draco nodded in understanding. He let her slide away from him. She made it to the door, but then stopped and turned to face him.
"Thank you for last night," she said. "I would appreciate your discretion on this…I don't know if I can handle any questions at the moment."
Draco nodded again. "Of course. If you need anything, you know where I am."
Hermione exited his room into the bright common room. She espied the letter on the middle of the floor but didn't pick it up. She knew that he was dead, but having the paper in her hands would make it more palpable, more real. She went to her room and went through the motions of getting ready for the day. It was all she could do.
7 years later
Draco Malfoy woke with a start, his bedroom was far too bright for the time he should have been awake.
He turned and grabbed his clock to check the time; it was half past 12 in the afternoon.
"Shit!" He cursed as he jumped out of bed, nearly tossing the sleeping girl beside him onto the floor. She let out a groan of annoyance.
"Draco, whas goin' on?" she asked, still half asleep.
"Look, I have to go. You know where the door is. And if you take anything, I'll know." He said as he threw on a shirt and pulled up his jeans that he had worn last night. They reeked of stale cigarettes and alcohol, but he didn't have time to change, he was already late and he knew how much it irritated Hermione when he kept her waiting.
"Yeesh, all right," the girl flipped to her other side and continued to snooze as Draco raced out the door.
He spotted her immediately when he entered the restaurant, her brown hair was hard to miss after all these years. It was the one thing that had stayed the same about her, though she had gotten it down to glossy curls instead of the ball of frizz she sported while they were at Hogwarts. Like he expected, she was stirring a coffee with a frown on her face. She looked at her watch in irritation, not having noticed him yet.
He rushed to the table, slightly out of breath.
"Hey." He said, taking a seat across from her.
She looked up at him and her expression didn't change. "No, hey would have been acceptable thirty minutes ago. I think I deserve a little more than a hey right now." She said, crossing her arms across her chest.
Draco sighed, he was too hungover to think of an acceptable reason for why he was late. "I'm sorry, Granger. I had a rough night."
"Yes, so I smell." Hermione wrinkled her noise.
Draco cocked a grin, giving her his best Well, what can I say? face. She rolled her eyes and motioned for the waitress.
"Another coffee, please, for my friend here. Black," she said.
"Would you like anything else?" the waitress asked, her pen poised over her pad.
"Bacon and eggs, over easy. And some toast. And hashbrowns." Draco ordered without looking at the menu.
"We stop serving breakfast at 11, sir."
"Ah, really?" Draco quickly glanced at Hermione. "That's really a shame, Sarah." He said, reading her name off her nametag. "You know I had a girlfriend named Sarah once."
"Really?"
Draco slung his elbow on the back of his chair so that he could face her full on. "Yeah, not as pretty as you though," he said, giving her his killer grin. If this didn't work, they would have to find another place that served breakfast.
She blushed and giggled. "I'll see what I can do about your eggs and bacon."
"You're a doll," he said, giving her a wink. "And don't forget the toast and hashbrowns."
With another giggle she grabbed their menus and departed.
Draco turned to Hermione with a wide grin on his face. She merely stared back at him shaking her head.
"You're unbelievable, you know that?"
Draco shrugged, "I'm a hungry man, Granger. I have to use what I got to get what I want."
Hermione shook her head again, "Which is what you were doing last night, no doubt. Who is she this time, Draco? I can't imagine there are any good looking girls left in London for you to fuck since you've already gotten to them all."
"Hey, now," Draco straightened himself in his chair. "I don't lecture you about fucking."
"Maybe you would if I slept with another guy every night."
"Eh, maybe. What's got your skivies in a bunch? You're extra..." Draco fished around for the right word. "Tenacious today."
Hermione heaved a sigh, she knew when she was being a bitch, which was one thing Draco liked about Hermione. She at least recognized it when it was happening.
"Aside from you being a half an hour late?"
"Aside from that."
Hermione didn't answer for a moment. "Ron and I broke up." She said tersely.
"Finally!" Draco threw his hands in the air. "How long have I been telling you to dump that loser?"
Hermione didn't respond, but looked down at her coffee.
"Wait, did he break up with you?"
Draco sighed when she didn't respond. "I can't believe that asshole broke up with you."
Hermione sniffed daintily and looked up at him. Her eyes were completely dry. "It was for the best, really. He and Harry are abroad so much, it didn't make sense to keep trying."
"Harry and Ginny are still together." Draco said, but he had a feeling he wasn't making her feel any better.
"Well, some people are just better at relationships, I suppose." She said loftily, taking a sip of her coffee.
"He was a git from the start, there was no making that relationship work."
"Yes, well regardless. How have you been? I daresay you've gotten yourself into plenty of shenagnigans in the week I haven't seen you."
The two sat there chatting for the next couple hours, as was their ritual for 7 years. Of course it didn't always work out, life did get in the way on occasion. But they would make up for it, grabbing a quick coffee when they could. Occasionally they would go out for drinks, but Hermione rarely let herself into those situations. They always ended the same way.
"So, we're on for next Saturday?" Draco asked as they exited the restaurant. "My turn to pick, next time we might not have a waitress I can hit on and you know I need breakfast."
"Actually, I'm busy."
"Doing what?" Draco asked as they walked down the street to the train.
"I'm moving out," Hermione said as she waited for the crosswalk sign to turn green.
"Wait, you're moving out and you weren't going to ask for my help?" Draco asked, turning to her. She was still busy watching the traffic and avoiding his eye.
"I know how much you dislike Ron and I figured keeping you two apart would be for the best."
Draco snorted, "That doesn't mean I'm not going to help you. Do you even have a place to live yet?"
Hermione started walking across the street and didn't answer.
"Granger, did you hear me? I asked if you had a place to live."
Hermione stopped abruptly once they had reached the other side of the street and rounded on him. "No, I don't! I don't have a place to live and I need to be out by Saturday and I have no idea what I'm doing or where I'm going, okay? Are you happy?" she screeched.
Draco pulled her to the side of the street so they were out of the way of the other pedestrians, some of whom had looked over at her sudden outburst.
"Why would I be happy about that?" he asked with his hand still firmly gripped on her arm.
"Because you've always said the entire time we've been together that it was going to end badly and it has, so you're right! You should be positively thrilled right now, you always are when you get your way."
Draco shook his head. She couldn't be serious about this. "Hermione," he used her first name to let her know he meant business, "I would never be happy about you being hurt, especially by that sorry excuse for a man. Don't wait till next Saturday, get your stuff and you can move in with me until you find a place of your own."
Hermione hesitated. "I don't know if that's a good idea, Draco. It can't be that hard to find a place…"
"Hermione, it'll be impossible for you to find a livable apartment in this short of time that's actually affordable. I have more than enough room for the two of us, you'll barely see me if you don't want to."
He could tell that Hermione was seriously considering his offer. She was biting her lower lip as she weighed her options. He took advantage of her hesitation.
"Look, you don't want to spend another week with that git so I'll come over tomorrow morning, we'll pack up your stuff and have you moved into my place in time for afternoon tea. This isn't permanent, Hermione. It's just until you get back on your feet." He squeezed her arm in reassurance.
"All right, but under one condition," she said.
"What's that?" he asked, grinning.
"I'm not sleeping with you," she said firmly.
Draco laughed, "Are you sure that's something you want me to promise? You'll be losing out."
Hermione returned a small smile. "Just promise me that you won't try to."
"Yeah, yeah," Draco waved her off. "Whatever you want, princess."