The incessant noise of mattress springs being strained was usually music to Murdoc Niccals ears, but things changed when it wasn't the bass-god who was making the racket. The founder of the world's greatest band slouched lower in the kitchen chair he was currently occupying, groaning. He had journeyed up from the carpark which housed his Winnebago for the soul purpose of treating what was already becoming a colossal hangover, and the muddy concoction in his glass was going to do very little good if he couldn't get any peace and quiet.
He turned his bloodshot, mismatched eyes towards the ceiling with a venomous glare. The squeaking and giggling coming from one of the upper floors seemed to echo through the entire studio, reverberating around the cracked and stained walls with an almost mocking clarity. Murdoc put a hand to his forehead, dragging his fingers down over his face as a guttural growl escaped his lips. 'Stupid waste of space…' he thought angrily. 'Wot're they still doin' up anyway?'
The clock above the grease-encrusted stove read 2:27 AM, and while this wasn't exactly a late night for the bass player, he hadn't expected any of his band mates to be keeping late hours, what with them working full time on what was to be their debut album. Bunch of goodie-two-shoes that they were.
Despite his malicious mental urgings, the noises continued and by the time the clock read 2:29, Murdoc had had enough. Slamming both hands down on the kitchen table, the dark-haired man rose from his seat, clad only in his yellowed briefs and thick leather boots, and stormed out of the room.
A short tromp up the neon-lit stairwell and Murdoc was closing in on the source of the auditory offense. With his pointed teeth grinding in aggravation he approached the door at the end of the hall as the sounds grew louder and clearer.
"Oh please, luv…"
Soft giggles were the only response.
"N-no, come on now…you really shouldn't – ah!"
More laughter.
"Yeh don' understand! Yer gonna get me in trouble if yeh keep this up…"
A female voice spoke unintelligibly and then a soft moan belonging to the band's lead vocalist followed.
'For the love of –!' Incensed, Murdoc didn't bother going for the doorknob, instead opting to land one well-executed kick against the door, knocking it inward with a loud bang. "Will the two of yeh cut the crap already?!" he bellowed, breathing ragged as his wild eyes threatened to set fire to the pair in the center of the room.
2D raised his blue-haired head in a panic, his hollow eyes wide. "M-Murdoc! I-I thought yeh'd gone back to the 'B-bago…" The scrawny young man was kneeling on the wooden floor, his upper torso clinging to the large bed as if he'd recently fallen from it. Beside him, their newest member, eight-year-old Noodle was bouncing on the rumpled bedding, her smile speaking volumes more than her very limited English.
Upon spotting the newcomer to her room, the little Japanese girl paused her mattress romp. The oversized T-shirt she was wearing as a makeshift nightgown had come from 2D's closet and its Power Puff Girls decal distorted as the fabric settled around her tiny frame. "Murdocu-san!" she cried, greeting her guest with a sky-high wave that sent the shirt sliding off her un-raised shoulder. "Anata wa watashitachi to issho ni asobi ni kite imashita ka?"
The olive-skinned man grimaced. He had never been fond of children, not even when he was one, and being addressed with what he could only guess was some bizarre foreign term of endearment was grossly unnerving. He pulled his gaze away from her much-too-sincere smile and glared at his singer. "Wot's she still doin' up?" he demanded. "Russ sent the two of yeh up here ages ago!"
"I know, I know!" 2D said, shaggy blue locks flying as he nodded, "'M sorry, Murdoc, but she won't settle down! The more I try, the more wound up she gets!"
As if on cue, Noodle chose that moment to latch onto the lanky singer's back, wrapping her arms and legs around his torso. "Raido, 2D-san! Jōba!"
Stuart Pot gagged, struggling with the sudden new weight. "See wot I mean?" he choked out. Reaching awkwardly behind him, he managed to free himself. "Aren't yeh worn out yet, luv?" he asked the child, setting her back down on her bed.
Noodle merely cocked her head at him, puzzled. Then, indicating a disregard for the miscommunication, she flung herself back into his arms. "Watashi wa tobitai! Onegaishimasu?"
"Ooof! See?" 2D wailed, knees buckling beneath him as he worked to steady himself while supporting her.
Murdoc was none too amused at the antics. "Yeh great waste, yeh're goin' 'bout it all wrong," he growled, striding across the room purposefully. Gripping the girl about the waist, he pulled her away from the vocalist and twisted her roughly to face him. "Look here, missy – I can't have yeh up all night, cuz I need yeh playin' first thing in the morning. So yeh can just park it," he said forcefully, picking her up and sitting her down against her pillows. "Now I don' wanna hear another peep, got me?"
With her hands over her mouth, Noodle let out a stifled giggle, but then fell quiet.
Smirking in smug satisfaction, Murdoc gestured at her as if she were a well-placed part of the décor he was showing off. "An' that's 'ow it's done, dullard. Honestly, why Russ trusts you with anythin' is beyond me. I'm obviously the only one who–" He was cut off as a pillow collided with his face.
Noodle erupted in a high-pitched, shrieking laugh as the bass player staggered backwards. As Murdoc regained his footing, absolutely livid, 2D clapped a hand over his mouth, trying in vain to suppress his own laughter.
"Why you little–!" the dark-haired Satanist barked, lunging forward.
"Muds, no!" 2D cried, throwing his arms around the child.
His dramatic panic turned out to be unfounded however, as Murdoc was stopped in his assault by a thick hand coming down hard on his shoulder. Unbeknownst to all of them, Russell had entered the room. "That's enough," the drummer rumbled, the rings under his eyes darker than usual.
Murdoc craned his neck to meet the bigger man's cold stare with his own fiery one and for one tense moment, the two engaged in a silent battle of wills. Then the bass player let his arms drop to his sides. "Wasn't gonna hurt 'er…" he muttered.
"Did we wake yeh, Russ?" 2D asked as Noodle wriggled out of his spindly grip.
"Doesn't matter," the drummer said, shaking his head. He released Murdoc just as the little girl bounded across the bed and into his arms. "Hey, baby girl," he greeted her with a gentle smile. "I thought I told you it was bedtime?"
"Shikashi, watashi wa zenzen shinai tsukarete iru, Russell-san," she protested, "Watashi ga purei shitai!"
"She's too riled, Russ," 2D said, rubbing one thin arm nervously. "I did everythin' yeh said to, I swear. I got 'er washed and dressed and read to 'er…"
"Still don't see the point o' that…" Murdoc pouted, "'S'not like she understands any of it…"
Russell silenced the bass player with a stern glance and then returned his attention to the singer. "Guess she's just not used to us takin' turns with this yet," he sighed as the child clambered up onto his massive shoulders. "The way she sees it, you're her playtime guy, I'm the one who takes care of this…er…domestic stuff, and you…" He pointed at Murdoc as he wracked his brain, "…I don't even know what she thinks you are."
The Satanist snorted indignantly.
"But," Russell continued, as Noodle tugged at his ears as if they were reigns. "That's gotta change. I can't be the only responsible one around here. We're all gonna hafta step up and make her realize that she's gotta listen to us. We're the grown-ups, so it's time to act like it." He glanced pointedly at Murdoc as he finished, causing the bass player to stick out his snakelike tongue in protest.
"Russell-san!" Noodle cried, tired of being ignored. "Saasaa…uma, uma!" She pressed her heels into his chest as if prodding an actual horse into motion.
"No, no 'uma'," he said, reaching up to pull her down from her perch. "Bed. You know that," he told her, holding her so they were eye-to-eye.
The little Japanese girl watched him silently for a moment, scrutinizing his somber expression. Deciding that this was not what she wanted to see, she thrust her hands towards his face and hooked her thumbs in the corner of his mouth. "Egao, Russell-san!"
Gagging in surprise, the dark-skinned drummer dropped her back onto her bed, coughing and spluttering.
"I told you!" Murdoc cried. "Little she-devil."
"Alright, come on now," Russell said, ignoring the bass player as he made a grab for the child, who had resumed using her mattress as a trampoline.
"Please, luv, we're tired…" 2D whined.
"Alright, D, you get 'er from that side," Russell said, working his way around the back of the headboard. "Muds, you go from this side."
"Yeah, yeah."
"Ready…? Go!"
"Oof, ow – tha's me!"
"Well get out of the way then!"
"Got 'er! Erk – c'mon, Noods, quit wiggling!"
"You just 'old 'er down, Russ. I'll tuck 'er in so tight she won't even be able to breathe much less move."
"Aw, there's no need to be mean…"
"D! Ack! Would ya grab her legs or something?"
"Right, sorry!"
As the clock struck 3:13 AM, the sound of snoring filled Noodle's bedroom, though the little girl was not the source. She was seated in Russelll's lap, being rocked by his slow breathing, while 2D and Murdoc lay sprawled out in front of them (the former on his stomach, the latter on his back), with their limbs dangling off the edges as they slept. She smiled to herself. In their attempts to put her to sleep, they'd worn themselves out while she remained awake.
She raised a hand as she yawned. Maybe it was time for bed – there was no one left to play with, after all. Climbing carefully off of the drummer's thick legs, she stood on tiptoe to kiss his shaved head. She then crouched down and crawled on hands and knees to the others. For 2D, she buried her nose in his disheveled hair, nuzzling against his head. Then she turned to Murdoc, who was the loudest sleeper of the three. She leaned over him for a long moment, watching his mouth work with curiosity. She then placed a delicate kiss on his oh-so crooked nose and scooted away quickly, lest he should awaken.
With a bit of work, she freed her stuffed monkey from beneath Russell and then curled up with it in the last bit of free mattress space – a spot directly in between all three men. As she let her eyes fall shut, she smiled and whispered, "Oyasuminasai, Papas…"
~Fin~
Noodle Translator
Since she was super chatty in this fic, I thought some loose translations might be in order. This is just from Google's translator, so I make no claims to 100% accuracy.
Anata wa watashitachi to issho ni asobi ni kite imashita ka? = Have you come to play with us?
Raido = ride
Jōba = horse riding
Watashi wa tobitai = I want to fly
Onegaishimasu = please
Shikashi, watashi wa zenzen shinai tsukarete iru = But I'm not tired at all
Watashi ga purei shitai = I want to play
Saasaa = come now
Uma = horse
Egao = smile
Oyasuminasai = good night