An extraordinary man has extraordinary problems.

Gauis didn't blame the entire Six line for wanting to frak him - who wouldn't want to frak a handsome genius who also happened to be the president of the Twelve Colonies? - but it did pose some interesting issues where Caprica was concerned. She'd grown more possessive on this planet and was increasingly pissed each time she caught him frakking one of her sisters.

Caprica could be terrifying when she was angry. She was quite fond of reminding him she could break him in half if she so desired. And for whatever reason, "I thought she was you," didn't cut it with her even though it had worked more than once on human women.

So he decided to approach telling the women apart like the good scientist he was; frakking each one who came to his bed was research and geniuses often had to suffer in search of answers.

He started with the five senses. Of course they all looked and felt the same so he ruled out those hypotheses right away. He'd been more intrigued to discover that they were like human women in that they tasted different depending on what they'd eaten. Filing that piece of knowledge away, he marked that off as well. Smell was out because, he'd discovered recently, Cylons didn't have a smell and all the Sixes used the same damn perfume they got from who the frak knew where. He thought he might have cracked it at sound but after listening to the recording of Caprica (he knew it was her, or was at least as sure as he could be) and one he didn't think was her (again, pretty sure) he found they all screamed like banshees when they came.

One night she caught him licking off a Six who was tied to the bed. After gently untying her and escorting her out of the presidential bedroom - she was always so gentle with her sisters and he wondered why the frak she couldn't just tell them to quit pretending to be her instead of blaming the victim - she tied him up instead and got him nice and hard with gentle licks up and down his shaft. Just as he was about to explode she left the room and didn't come back until the next morning.

He toyed with the idea of getting her some piece of jewelry that only she would have but discarded the idea when he realized she'd probably figure out what he was trying to do and leave him tied up for two days instead of one.

Finally, he settled on another research method he'd always disdained but just might work. He'd simply ask the subject.

He got his chance when she came into his bedroom, licked his ear and whispered, "it's me." She seemed amenable enough to the suggestion that she tell him a way to be sure it was every time.

When she jammed one of her long fingers with her really long fingernail up his ass as he came he wished he'd gone with the jewelry.