Coding: Laura Roslin/Adar
Timeline: Pre-Mini-Series
Spoilers: Act of Contrition
Disclaimer: Ronald D. Moore and Universal Studios own everything! I own my imagination. Don't sue.
Meeting Providence
She doesn't want him to come to the doctor's appointment with her. She's been very specific about that and she thinks, secretly, Adar is relieved. He's worried about her but he's about to embark on the re-election campaign and his mind should be focused on that.
Adar is the only reason she's still in politics; it's the only way she can spend any kind of quality time with him, play a part in his life. She's spent twenty odd years following him, now her body is tired and she's scared as hell because this is how her mother went. As she dresses for her doctor's appointment she thinks of her mother in that hospital bed, frail and drawn; her hands thin and clinging onto Laura…
Roslin looks at her own reflection as she brushes her hair and imagines herself at the end… who would be there to hold her hand? Her parents were gone… her sisters… and Adar – he loves her, she's sure, but there's something in the way he keeps saying 'if'.
"If you're ill…"
"If you have cancer…"
And she doesn't think he can cope with the outcome if it is cancer.
Adar has taught her the ins-and-outs of politics – of human nature. How to delegate, how to compromise, how to resolve problems with diplomacy instead of violence… she's been at his side and watched him make decisions she's glad she'll never have to make; seen him act composed in public only to fall into her arms when they're alone. His conscience is one of the reasons she loves him, it's also why, if the tests come back positive, she won't put him through the ordeal of seeing her suffer. She thinks of her mother and closes her eyes. She won't let Adar go through that.
Laura had sat by her mother's bedside, watched her decline… saw her struggling for breath; trying to hide the pain that wracked her body, that's when Laura knew what terror really was. Seeing her mother wheeled into yet another hospital ward, surrounded by IV's and wearing the scars of previous operations; that's when she stopped looking for reasons in the world, because she realized there were none.
Opening her eyes, Laura takes a last glance at the mirror – she has a decommissioning ceremonial thing to attend later today aboard Galactica – so she's wearing her best suit. She looks poised and she smiles to herself; she always had that skill; apparent composure when her heart is breaking and for a moment she wonders why she views it as a skill.
Roslin doesn't really want to go to Galactica but Adar had insisted, he thought it would be good for her; keep her occupied. But Laura has this feeling… that's why she's postponed this consultation – she already knows the result and she thinks, if the doctor doesn't actually say the words, then she won't really be ill. At the same time, she wants it over, wants to know for sure. Wants to begin the fight because she's never been a quitter and she's not going to start now.
She picks up her over-night case and heads for the door. The phone rings and Laura pauses in the doorway, the answering machine comes on and Adar's voice sounds through the room. "Hi Laura, I was just calling to wish you luck for today - not that you need it… I'm sure everything's going to be fine, you're one of life's survivors," he pauses. "Take care… love you. Bye," and he hangs up.
Roslin smiles to herself as she closes the door of her apartment. She hurries down the corridor; she doesn't want to be late for her appointment, that would set her whole day back and she can't miss the flight to Galactica, can't escape providence.
The End