WARNING! This fic contains major spoilers for Kingdom Hearts I, Chain of Memories, and II! Don't even read the Author's Notes if you haven't completed all the games!
Author's Note: Hello, dears! Finally. My first completed fanfiction. It may be a oneshot angst/fluff piece, but it's FINISHED! Mwahahahahahaha! I hope you all enjoy it, and please feel free to leave comments and/or constructive criticism (that's constructive criticism, not flames) in a review. I'd very much appreciate it!
Also, I should point out that I haven't played Chain of Memories, so anything taken from that game is what I had in the script before me. (Google is my friend.) In other words, I'm sorry if I screwed anything up.
As for the ficlet itself, I took most of the dialogue (as far as the KH, COM, and KHII scenes go) directly from the script of the games. You'll probably recognize it all anyway, but I didn't want to use the dialogue without saying, "Hey! This isn't mine!"
This ficcy is set the night of the trio's return to Destiny Islands (post-KH II, pre-Mickey's letter).
Disclaimer: Need I really say it? Kingdom Hearts, and anything to do with it belongs not to me, but to Disney and Square Enix. If the characters belonged to me, this wouldn't be on this site, now would it?
The End
"It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end."
Riku vaguely remembered reading the quote somewhere- probably in one of the random volumes he'd poured over in the library on a day too hot to sail over to the Islands. He wasn't particularly surprised that the quote had crept into his mind, Not in a situation like this, anyway, he thought. For the third time in as many minutes, Riku swallowed, his deafening gulp echoing in his ears. This isn't fair.
Riku had done a lot of resisting, and whoever had originally coined the phrase had it right; it only became more and more difficult.
The first instance that came to mind was a few years before their adventures began. Riku had been twelve at the time.
--
He and Sora had gotten relatively bored of the others' antics, especially when Selphie had whipped out her jump rope and suggested a "jump off"… whatever that was. The two boys had looked at Kairi, only to find that she was planning to participate in the "jump off." They sighed, and one glance at the crazy tricks Selphie was already doing told them Kairi wouldn't get her turn for a while. The boys had decided to go to the trio's secret hiding place without her.
After all, Wakka and Tidus weren't back with the ice lollies yet, which likely meant they'd gotten distracted by something-or-other in a shop window. They probably wouldn't be back for at least an hour, and Riku and Sora had better things to do than watch a couple of girls play jump rope- even if it meant eventual ice lollies.
Riku stood watching as Sora scratched a crude drawing into the wall of their cave. It… slightly resembled a fish. Sora finished and looked expectantly up at Riku from his position on the floor.
"It's uh… nice," he said with a slight cough. Sora grinned, oblivious to the blatant lie.
"It's a bird!" he announced, tossing aside his drawing instrument- a rock. Riku frowned and cocked his head.
He couldn't help but ask, "How?"
At this, Sora frowned. "It's not that bad! I bet you couldn't do better."
"Sora, it doesn't have legs." There was a slight pause.
"They're- they're tucked up in his feathers! He's flying." Riku tried to turn his sudden burst of laughter into a cough, but failed. Sora launched himself at his silver-haired friend.
Unfortunately, even then Riku was bigger and stronger than Sora, despite the fact that he was only a year older. Their wrestling match was quite short, resulting in Riku pinning Sora to the ground by his shoulders. His legs flailed madly, but Riku had him firmly pinned, and they both knew it.
Both boys were laughing and Sora's blue eyes shone as they met with Riku's. Something clutched the older boy's stomach in a tight grasp, but as soon as it was there, it was gone.
What was that, Riku wondered.
"Erm… Riku?"
Suddenly, the older boy became aware of the squirming beneath his hands- Sora. Immediately, he released his friend, but he failed to move quickly enough. As Sora shot up, his forehead crashed into Riku's nose. There was a resounding crack closely followed by a low moan.
"Oops…" Sora's puppy dog eyes widened, "Sorry, Riku!"
Yeah, that had been painful. Riku hadn't appreciated one bit the nose cast he'd had to wear. He'd come close to exacting revenge upon Sora, but the boy was too damn fast. Riku settled for a sprained ankle, but he would have prefered to break his friend's nose right back. Oh well, at least his nose had returned to its normal size and shape eventually.
It was that clenched feeling he couldn't shake. After that initial vice grip, the sensation returned on many an occasion, but he ignored it.
--
Then, just before their journeys began, he and Sora were sitting on the trunk of the Paopu tree. Riku had been watching the beautiful orange, pink, and purple sunset. The sun's fading rays danced across the surface of the water before them, sending glimmers of light into Riku's eyes.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" he asked Sora. Spiky brown hair stirred as the boy whipped his head around.
"Wha- huh? I wasn't… What did you say?" Riku rolled his eyes at his friend's confused expression. He should've known better than to interrupt Sora's thoughts. Those bright blue eyes were off in another world. If only we were too, Riku wished.
"The sunset- it's beautiful." He turned his head to watch his friend's reaction as he gazed at the beautiful portrait before them. Sora's smile lifted his entire being as he stared at the sun setting on the sea.
"Yeah, it is." Sora sighed and crossed his arms behind his head. "Hey Riku?"
"Yeah?"
"It's times like this that make me wonder why you want to leave the Islands so much. Do you really want to give up things like this sunset? This Paopu tree? This moment?"
Riku turned to Sora, pleasantly surprised at his thoughts. He hadn't expected Sora to say something so… meaningful. Usually, the boy was acting too silly to really talk about things. Riku felt that familiar knot again, but this time it didn't disappear. No, it stayed there, twisting away at his insides whenever he was with Sora. By this point, he was pretty sure he knew what it was.
--
Three days later the Destiny Islands were besieged by the Heartless. Riku remembered that night all too well. He had been so… happy.
"The door has opened, Sora! Now we can go to the outside world!" Riku smiled, but Sora seemed reluctant. The silver-haired boy reached out a hand to his friend, but Sora drew back. Something broke within Riku in that moment, and it was suddenly too late. Sora was gone.
Time passed as Riku fell in with Malificent. She told him what to do to find Sora and save Kairi, and he obeyed. As the sorceress fed him lies about Sora's betrayal, that strangely pleasant clench turned into a stabbing pain, and Riku stopped caring which side he was on. Black and white blurred to gray as the pain within him intensified.
Then Sora had come. Sora gave him a path to the light. His pain began to ebb, even as Xehanort's heartless took over him. As long as Sora was there, the pain receeded. Eventually, Sora destroyed Xehanort's heartless, and Riku was freed. He remembered watching Sora as the door to darkness closed. A million things raced through his mind, countless things he needed to say to Sora. Riku barely resisted the urge to lean across the distance between them and kiss the boy with those captivating blue eyes. The knot was back. He sighed, knowing he couldn't say any of the things he wanted to say. Finally, he murmured, "Take care of her."
Sora nodded. The door closed and a single tear ran down Riku's cheek. He quickly brushed it away and turned to help the king.
--
After that, Riku was forced to fight his way through Castle Oblivion. Without Sora, the pain returned. It was no longer the stabbing pain of betrayal and rejection, but a constant ache. Riku longed to see him, to stare once more into those shining sapphire eyes. The pain never left him- that is, until he met Naminé.
She led him straight to Sora, no questions asked, no requirements, nothing. Suddenly, Riku was once more standing before his best friend. But… his eyes… his eyes were closed in peaceful slumber.
"What did you do to him?" he turned back to Naminé, many strings of emotions tangled in his stomach.
"Nothing," she replied softly, "he's just sleeping. He must- to get his memory back."
His memory? What was she talking about? Had Sora lost his memory? Forgotten the Islands? His friends? Why?
"Tell me what happened," he begged, pushing all thoughts away and trying to think clearly. She told him. She told him everything.
"So… Sora chose to forget about this castle and get back his old memories." His memories of me, Riku couldn't help but think. Naminé nodded.
The soft-spoken girl guided him to his decision to battle Xehanort's heartless, the darkness within him. He fought that battle and won, but when he realized the darkness was not yet gone, he sighed. He could never face Sora that way.
He'd decided to walk the twilit road with Mickey, hoping to erase the last shred of Xehanort in his heart.
--
It had been a year before Riku had seen Sora again, face-to-face.
Kairi tugged his hand forward, calling Sora to them. It was at this point in time that Riku could no longer bring himself to resist. He let Sora come forward and take his hand. An electric shock raced through him.
Sora had changed so much. He was taller, more muscular than he'd been a year before. But it was his eyes that had changed the most. He'd been put through so much. These adventures, these battles had taken a telling toll on the boy. His eyes were older, deeper. If possible, they were more stunning than before.
The eyes closed as Kairi directed, and Riku stared at his friend, praying he would see. And he did see. Riku knew the moment Sora realized he was holding the hand of his long-lost friend. Riku smiled faintly, and Sora opened his eyes.
"Riku," he whispered in awe, "it's Riku. Riku's here…" Then Sora fell to his knees, still clinging to Riku's hand, as if he'd disappear if one of them pulled away. Riku was in shock. What was Sora doing? Tears streamed down his best friend's cheeks. Tears for… for what? For… who?
"I looked for you!" Riku hated seeing Sora in such a broken state. He didn't know what to do.
"C-c'mon, Sora. You've got to pull it together," he said, his voice wavering slightly. Please. Don't cry like this…
"I looked everywhere for you!" Sora shouted, clutching Riku's hand tighter. Through the pain, Riku nearly laughed. How could I let you find me, Sora? I was on the wrong side… You would've hated me- you will hate me, once you find out.
"I didn't want you to find me."
Goofy, Sora's least credited friend, was the first to figure out that the trio's anonymous "guiding light" had been him. Riku.
"Why didn't you let me know you were okay?" Sora's eyes were pleading. Riku hadn't been prepared for this. Why was Sora reacting this way? The ever-present knot spread to Riku's throat. He worried his next words would be lost in a sob, but he managed to force them out calmly.
"I told you… I didn't want to be found. Not like this…" He looked down at himself in shame. How he wished he could share Sora's light. The entire group was silent as Riku explained what he'd done. Kairi's voice was soft and saddened.
"Does that mean you can't change back?" she asked. Riku shook his head sadly.
"This battle isn't over, and until it is, I still need the power of darkness." He prepared to turn and leave when Sora spoke.
"Then… let's finish it. You're still Riku, no matter what!" Riku was frozen in place as a smile tugged at his lips. The tightness in his stomach twisted into a warmth that spread throughout his body. Sora had accepted him despite his darkness.
--
The last time Riku had had to resist was just the night before as he'd sat with Sora on the beach of the World That Never Was.
"What I said back there… about thinking I was better at stuff than you… To tell you the truth, Sora… I was jealous of you."
Sora frowned. "What for?"
"I wished I could live life the way you do. Just following my heart." Unfortunately, Sora, if I did that, I'd likely lose your friendship.
"Yeah, well I've got my share of problems, too."
"Like what?" I bet it has nothing to do with having feelings for your best friend.
"Like wanting to be like you."
Riku was caught completely off-guard. He looked into Sora's clear blue eyes and saw that he meant what he'd said. Like me? Riku was taken aback. He smiled.
"Well," he said, "there is one advantage to being me… Something you could never imitate." Sora's eyes widened in curiosity.
"Really? What's that?"
"Having you for a friend." The statement was true, but it went deeper than that. Sora seemed to be contemplating something.
"Then I guess I'm okay the way I am. I've got something you could never imitate too." Riku smiled, wishing there was more meaning behind Sora's words. The two sat together a while on the beach, looking out to the sea.
Riku turned to Sora. They were there. Together. Just them. The moment seemed perfect. Riku felt himself leaning in to Sora when something cold touched his leg. Don't be stupid, he told himself as he reached for the glass bottle and took out the message inside. He read it and smiled bitterly, handing Kairi's letter to Sora.
"Sora? I think it's for you."
Sora read the letter aloud, creating a new kind of pain that replaced the warmth within Riku. He clutched his stomach as a bright light shone in the corner of his eye. He shifted his glance toward the appearing door.
"Light," he murmured. Sora glanced up at the door.
"The door to light…" he whispered, standing. He offered his hand to Riku and helped him stand. "We'll go together."
Riku smiled.
"Yeah."
--
The boys returned home- the door had taken them back to the Destiny Islands. They'd kicked their way to shore and were greeted by Kairi, Donald, Goofy, and Mickey. The king and his subjects, however, had to leave almost immediately to return to their home, promising that they'd stay in touch. After an extended goodbye, the Disney trio left for their own world.
Kairi had gone right away to find Selphie, Wakka, and Tidus, but Sora and Riku stayed at the beach, not yet ready to return to their normal lives.
Riku had collapsed onto the sand, exhausted. Sora, eternally full of energy, sat down beside him.
"Now that we're here… I don't know if I wanted to go back," Riku said. He paused in hesitation. "Sora, do you remember that time we were talking by the Paopu tree and you asked how I could want to leave this?" He made a sweeping gesture that encompassed the setting sun that so resembled that day two years before.
"Yes," Sora replied softly. Riku brushed aside his surprise and continued.
"Well, I can't argue. This is beautiful. But it's not so much the sun or the sand or the Paopu tree. It's Kairi. It's you. And as long as I have that, anywhere would be as beautiful as this."
Riku glanced over at Sora, who was smiling, and that was the moment that faintly familiar quote had trickled into his mind.
He sighed and gulped once more, turning to face Sora completely. His courage was quickly slipping away, but he leaned forward and cupped Sora's cheek anyway. The boy's radiant blue eyes were unreadable as Riku bent down to kiss his friend.
He could feel Sora stiffen beside him, and he pulled away, eyes downcast.
"I'm sorry," Riku whispered as he stood. He turned but felt a tug on his arm. Glancing back, he was met with those brilliant eyes. Sora pulled Riku back down into the sand and returned his kiss.