Jason, I Need You..
Carly ran through the rain, soaking wet from head to toe, her clothes clinging to her body like a second skin.
Jason, I Need You..
She tried to get it out of her mind, tried to block out the searing image of Jax and Kate making out on their couch..in THEIR home. But she found it impossible, and with each second she thinks about it, her heart breaks a little more.
Jason, I Need You..
She wanted to run into Jason's arms, to have him hold her and tell her everything was going to be ok, to erase the stinging pain that infidelity can bring. Not 3 months into the marriage, and he does this shit. Carly thinks to herself, her tears mixing with the rain pelting her face. She came home, expecting to find Jax fast asleep in bed, and instead he was on top of that Anne Wintour-wannabe, kissing her lips, one hand through her hair, another hand under her dress. They didn't even notice her coming in and stopping halfway through the door. They didn't notice her small gasp of shock and pain. They didn't notice the tears forming in her blue eyes. And they damn sure didn't notice her leaving out the door, her half-stumbling down the steps.
Jason, I Need You..
Carly thought of going to her mother's, before realizing she was with Mike Corbin in Florida, on a damn vacation with her children, Michael and Morgan. My children..Michael..Morgan, they must be dead to the world right now.. Her only solace was knowing that her kids were safe with Bobbie and Mike. She thought of going to a hotel, until she remembered that she dropped her purse in shock of seeing Jax and Kate together, and all she could think of was getting out there ASAP. She wouldn't dare go back there--God knows what they were doing now. Prolly going at it like pigs, Carly thought bitterly. She damn sure wasn't going to go to Sonny. Last thing she needed was hate sex to top off her night, and she knew that was exactly was going to happen. She would always have a special place in her heart for Sonny, but she didn't love him anymore, nor was she in love with him. She had no other friends; everybody else hated her and she hated them. But there was always that one man who she felt even to this day..got away..
Jason, I Need You..
That was her mantra, the continuous thinking pattern above all. She needed Jason.
Her best friend.
Her rock.
Her shelter.
Her past love.
Maybe..she was beginning to realize..
Her only love..
Jason, I Need You..
Jason listened to the rain pelting morse codes on his windows. He had just gotten home before it started raining. He laid spread-eagle on his bed, beer in hand, tears running down his face. He wasn't crying from the booming headache that threatened to split his head wide open. He wasn't crying from the fact that he couldn't open the stubborn bottle-cap on his beer. He was crying because he was completely, utterly alone. He had no one to hold at night, he had no one to pillow talk with, and he had no one to kiss and tell 'I Love You' and hear the words repeated back to him. He had that with Sam, God how he loved Sam, but after finding out he was a father to Elizabeth's son, Jake, a result from their ONS, their love and bond just couldn't hold. He thought he was falling in love with Elizabeth, he really did, but it turned out his love for her was the love for his son. Then come to find out baby Jake wasn't really his..I lost Sam, I lost my son who wasn't even mine..I lost everything.. Jason was about to immerse himself farther into his sorrows, until a name, one single solitary name clicked in his mind, and sent a shot of warmth through his body, the one person he would never lose..
Carly.
The craziest, most complicated, woman he has ever had the blessing to know. Carly, fiery, brave, damn near insane, passionate, loyal, willing to put her life on the very line if it meant saving those she held to her heart. Jason knew he would do the exact same thing for her, he loved her with all his heart and soul. If only that day didn't happen..Jason thought. Seeing her in nothing but a shirt..Sonny's shirt. That day tore him apart like nothing before. On top of that he had been shot. He would be always grateful for Elizabeth being there, but he had intense hatred for her at this very moment. When he found out that Elizabeth knew that Jake was really Lucky's and had lied to everybody--again--about Jake's being Jason's..he flipped out, cussed her out, cut her off, and told Sam. Sam laughed in his face and said she had a feeling all along that he wasn't the father. She wouldn't take him back, and said she hoped Elizabeth was worth it all. When Lucky found out, all he could do was laugh too, and gave Elizabeth an even worse cuss-out than Jason. Now Elizabeth is all alone, raising her two kids from two fathers, and even to this day still stalks Jason, begging him for another chance. Like hell I will..Jason thought. Now Sam and Lucky were together, and honestly he wished them the best, but where did that leave him? Sonny was always there as his friend, and Michael + Morgan were always there and Jason was blessed to have those boys, but they weren't his boys, and he wanted a woman, a woman who loved him for who he was, mobster, hitman and all. A woman who wouldn't change him and loved him unconditionally. Where would I find that woman? Jason sadly thought. Was Sam the end-all be-all? Am I doomed to never have that love again because of the life I live? Where is that woman for me?
Carly.
Jason opened his cobalt blue eyes. He couldn't have Carly, she was married to another. Hell, he was her best man at her wedding and he had never seen her happier. Besides, Michael + Morgan were safe, and that was the most important thing. Wasn't it? All these thoughts were driving Jason nearly insane, so he did the one thing that always cleared his mind: driving his motorcycle. With an effort he got off his bed, and went to get his coat and raced down the stairs, determined to make some sense of his life. He flung open the door, and there she stood, soaked from head to toe, eyes brimming with tears, her face distorted with pain. Jason's heart jumped in his chest and began beating 100 miles a minute. He knew something was wrong.
"Remember when I told you that even If i was married to Jax, I still would need you to catch me when I fall?" Carly said between sobs.
Jason's heart broke for her. "Of course I do." He replied.
"I need you now, Jase."
Carly could say no more. she began crying even harder. Jason held out his arms, and Carly rushed to him, clinging to his body as if he were her very lifeline. In some ways, he was. Jason hugged her hard, breathing her scent in, and it almost cleansed him, as well as shocked him that they felt so right together. Maybe..it's supposed to be this way. Maybe, it's always should've been this way..Jason quickly pushed those thoughts out. Hurting or not, Carly was still married to Jax, and he didn't even know why Carly was here, so hurt, so vulnerable, yet still so beautiful..Jason caught himself thinking. After a couple more minutes of holding each other in the doorway, Jason led her to the couch and brought her a towel to dry herself off.
"Why don't you tell me what happened?" Jason asked as he sat on the table across from her.
Carly got herself together as best as she could. "Jax..he cheated on me, Jase."
Jason's eyes hardened, his breath got shorter, and his fists clenched until his fingernails were in his skin. He was about to shout and curse, until he saw the intense pain in Carly's eyes, and realized that it wasn't what she needed right now. He immediately softened up and took her hands.
"Carly, I'm so sorry." He got off the table and sat next to her holding her again, her head resting on his shoulder. Carly closed her eyes and found immense comfort in his touch.
"I came home, and there they were, on our couch, Jason, in our home.." She explained, the very memory of it constricting her voice."It hurts, Jase. It hurts like hell knowing that the man I made vows is on top of that..that slut." Carly began crying again, and held on to Jason even tighter.
Jason silently vowed to deal with Jax once Carly was ok and Michael and Morgan were nowhere near them. They didn't deserve to see the can of ass-whupping he was going to unleash on their step-father..hopefully former. "You don't have to make any decisions right now. Regardless of how much you're hurting right now, I know you still love him. Right now it looks like you need to get out of those clothes and into my--i mean a bed."
Jason checked himself quickly, hoping that Carly didn't catch his smalll error. She did, and as she raised her head to look at him, something flashed in those big blue eyes, clear of tears now, and a small smile crept across her mouth. God, she's beautiful, Jason thought.
"Jason, I'm flattered, and you're absolutely right, I do need some to get out these clothes." She got up and Jason went upstairs with her to get a shirt. "Unfortunately I don't have women's clothes, so I hope my shirt will do." He held out the shirt to her. Carly reached for it, their fingers touching, sending electrical shocks through them both.
Carly and Jason's eyes met, and Jason felt currents of love, lust, desire, and somewhat of of animalistic need to tear Carly's clothes apart and have her right then. Right there. He shut down his aching need. This was his best friend, his MARRIED best friend. He couldn't violate it, violate her, but God how he wanted to. Carly was the 1st to move away. She mouthed 'Thank you", and went into the bathroom to change. After standing there, forcing himself not to think about Carly in "that way", he moved to the door.
"You can sleep in my bed, Carly. I'll sleep on the couch tonight." A beat passed.
"Thank you, Jason." Carly said quietly. Jason put his hand on the door for a moment, then went downstairs. He got some blankets and a pillow and threw them on the couch, but something told him he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight..
15 minutes later, Carly came downstairs in nothing but a shirt. Jason's shirt. Jason was lying on the couch with his arms folded, watching TV when he saw her. It took every fiber and ounce of his being not to do things to her that had to have been illegal in some states. She looked utterly, completely radiant, her blue sparkling with something he wasn't clear about.
The love he also felt for her?
The lust he had creeping through his entire body as well?
Did she know how much he wanted her?
Stop it! Jason thought. She's your best friend, and even though Jax is a utter dickhead, they are still married. Jason tried with an effort to regain his composure and cleared his throat. He got up and stood at least a foot away from her. Any closer and she wouldn't have been safe from his touch.
"Umm..goodnight Carly. Sweet dreams."
He smiled a fruitless smile, wishing against everything that he could join her. But not now..not yet. Carly smiled and rushed to hug him. Jason immediately reciprocated, and they clung to each other. Jason savored her body close to his, and had to knock off any of the 50 million desires he felt at that very moment.
"Goodnight, Jason. And thank you, my best friend."
Carly pulled away and kissed him on the cheek. She walked away and up the stairs to Jason's room. Jason watched her until she was out of sight, then put a hand to where Carly's lips had been, and replayed the 3 seconds over and over until it was immortalized in his mind, heart and soul. He laid back on the couch, hoping to get some sleep, but it was a hollow hope. He knew that he was going to have X-rated thoughts about Carly tonight, but little did he know Carly had those same thoughts too..